


Hold It Against Me

by WolvenFighter



Series: Men of No Nation [3]
Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Arthur and John are OTP don't worry, Arthur's discovering his sexuality guys, Arthur's still in the closet lol, Distrust, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Feels, Fluff and Angst, M/M, More angst, Multi, Past Relationship(s), Period Typical Attitudes, Period-Typical Homophobia, Period-Typical Racism, Porn With Plot, Pre-Canon, Pre-Video Game: Red Dead Redemption 2 (2018), Sex, Slow Burn, Unresolved Sexual Tension, some canon changes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:34:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 138,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24851659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolvenFighter/pseuds/WolvenFighter
Summary: 1895.With the birth of Jack, things around camp finally begin to feel like a home... That is until old urges and a new face threaten everything that the hardened executioner of the Van der Linde Gang has known to believe about himself. How is he supposed to be a father when his old sins come back to haunt him..? And when the man he fell for finally returns, Arthur Morgan fears he will lose whatever sanity he has left chasing things that are so wrong but feel so right.[It's important that you read the first two parts to understand everything in this work.]
Relationships: Abigail Roberts Marston/Arthur Morgan, Abigail Roberts Marston/John Marston, Arthur Morgan/Original Male Character(s), John Marston/Arthur Morgan
Series: Men of No Nation [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1322261
Comments: 85
Kudos: 82





	1. He Looks Like His Daddy

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY! So there are a couple things I have to explain about this work before we get into the nitty-gritty of it! So I know that I tagged them, but don't expect many Arthur/John moments, those who've read the previous part will probably understand why lmao, however, this work is literally BASED around the Arthur/John pairing so I couldn't NOT put it in, I also know I put Arthur/Dutch but genuinely I don't know how far that will go (yet) either I may delete that pairing in the future should the work call for it I'm still playing with that idea.  
> Secondly, I know I put Arthur/OC but fear not, like I said this work revolves around Arthur and John but it's time for Arthur to have some hardcore truths about himself that I have been desperately waiting for (obviously without spoilers lmaoo).  
> If anyone has any questions feel free to ask and as always I love feedback! Don't hesitate to leave a comment I always love them! I'll shut up now so that you all can enjoy Part 3 of Men of No Nation! :)  
> -Eros

_May 11th, 1895_

_Well, we're finally back further south after spending months in Montana, I have to admit I'm going to miss it, but with Abigail being due any day it's best to get somewhere warmer and I have to admit, while there are many things I love about her, I can't wait for the pregnancy to be done. I have never been so frightened of a woman in my life, no matter what I do it's never right and while sometimes it's funny, I never laugh... God help me if I do._

_Dutch might almost be more excited than Abigail, but I can tell he tries to hide it... It's still hard to believe how good Abigail is to me, even when she's ripping me a new one for suggesting she sit down and rest her feet. She's never said anything about me being the kid's father... I wouldn't have blamed her if she confessed the truth and the respect I have for her is far greater than most people I know._

_I want to love her... Lord, I do, and I know part of me does but... I just don't think I have it in me anymore, but even though I can't give her what she deserves, I'll do whatever I can for her no matter what. I failed her once, not again._

Blinking, Arthur exhaled slowly as the pencil on the parchment paused. It had been almost three weeks since he had been able to jot down even the slightest illustration with everything that had been happening. If he wasn't helping prepare their big move he was with Abigail, sometimes to her dismay but ever since she had entered the eighth month in her pregnancy, Arthur didn't like leaving her alone for too long. He made sure to give her privacy when she needed it but it was difficult, the fierce protectiveness he felt over her made his life hell.

Things between her and Arthur were... Weird. Not bad, but a little weird, only because they still weren't sure where they stood. After John's disappearance, Arthur began seeing Abigail on a much more _regular_ basis, he was probably spending at least three nights a week with her. She had taken over John's tent after they moved away from Virginia City and with the 10,000 dollars they had received, Arthur saw to it that he got his own tent, there was nothing against Dutch but it made dealing with both of their losses easier for Arthur.

He had been good about keeping Dutch at an arm's length and the other had respected Arthur's decision to break things off between them, but that didn't mean that there weren't moments that Arthur missed it. Even now when they looked at each other a certain way, Arthur almost blushed and it had been _six months_. He sighed, knowing how pathetic it was for him to be so weak around Dutch, but he had done well with his boundaries.

Dutch and Hosea argued as they used to, which used to put Arthur on edge but now it comforted him in a way knowing that Hosea was back to his old self. Hosea argued that they should have used the money that Ivy had given them to buy a piece of land and start over, but Dutch argued back that if they were going to truly retire, they may as well get off the map completely. What was the point in settling down somewhere if you have to look over your shoulder all the time? However, Dutch did impress Arthur with his behavior after Abigail finally confessed the pregnancy to him.

It was like knowing that their little band of misfits was becoming an actual community where people could have families changed something in him, and finally for the better. They had been trying to keep their heads down since they would have a baby around camp and Dutch, while conniving and slick with his tongue, actually kept his hands clean and with Hosea's help, they were still able to farm some money together without ever having to draw their guns, when people started to suspect them they'd move... But now, they couldn't move until Abigail gave birth, which meant no illegal activities.

To say that Arthur was shocked that Mac and Davey stuck around was an understatement, but they had become valuable members once Arthur laid down the iron fist those months ago and they hadn't given him trouble since. Though now, only time would tell if they and Bill would be able to keep their heads down now that they weren't permitted to do any robbing until the baby was born, they couldn't risk having to pack up and run when Abigail was in labor. It wasn't like they couldn't make themselves useful around the few ranches in the area anyway, they came to farmlands for that reason alone.

Wondering exactly what kind of place they had stopped, Arthur pulled out a map that Hosea had snagged in town when he went to check the local population out. Humming, Arthur nodded to himself, it wasn't half bad, there were some stores and a couple of bars, a typical farm town they just had to stick it out for a little while.

"Hey." The familiar sweet tone of Abigail caught Arthur's attention and he glanced up as she walked towards him, a hand resting on her bump.

"Hey." Arthur replied as he got up and dusted himself off from leaning against a tree that he had been currently hiding behind.

"Sorry, hope I wasn't interrupting you." She mused as she watched Arthur shut his journal and slip it back into his satchel.

"Of course not." Arthur replied as he swung an arm around her shoulders and began walking with her back toward the center of camp. "You need me for somethin'?" He asked curiously.

"No, just wondering where you were." She chuckled, looking up to him with that beaming expression which Arthur couldn't help but smile back at in return as they walked to the campfire where Abigail sat down with a small sigh.

"You want me to get you anything?" Arthur then offered, watching Abigail smile and roll her eyes, at least she didn't get mad at him this time.

"I want you to just sit down with me, Arthur." She giggled, watching as Arthur cleared his throat and nodded before taking a seat next to her and feeling her lean into him.

"Mornin' Abigail, Arthur." Hosea greeted as he approached the fire as well, holding out his hands to warm them from the slightly crisp morning air.

"Hosea." Arthur replied, nodding his head to him.

"Mornin'-Oh!" Abigail gasped, a hand coming to her belly, watching Arthur glance at her quickly.

"You alright?"

"Oh, yes the baby is kicking, wanna feel?" She offered, looking up to Hosea.

Arthur knew the old man couldn't resist, he was getting softer and softer the older he got but Arthur wouldn't change him for the world. He tried to be coy at first, seeming unsure but he stepped up to Abigail quickly and took off his glove to rest it gently upon her distended stomach. It wasn't long before a gentle smile made its way onto Hosea's expression.

"Been so long since I've experienced life growing." He chuckled as the fetus responded to his touch by pushing against his hand.

Arthur could see the happiness in Hosea's eyes, it was hard to be unhappy with the prospect of a cute little baby running around soon enough. Even Bill offered his hand to Abigail when she was struggling upon standing up if Arthur wasn't there to help her. Everyone chipped in to make things easier on Abigail even if she didn't always want that, though she appreciated it dearly.

"Arthur! Hosea!" Dutch called as he rode back into camp on top of The Count.

"What is it? You come here!" Hosea replied, and seeing that both men were glued to Abgiail, Dutch chuckled and did as he was told.

"You wanna feel Dutch? He's fiery this mornin'." Abigail snorted as Dutch approached.

"He?" Dutch asked curiously as he bent down and felt the healthy kicking baby.

"Yeah... I think I finally figured it out." She replied with a nod of absolute certainty, and Arthur couldn't help but feel the sense of someone stabbing him in the gut, he was still scared as hell.

"My god he is angry ain't he." Dutch chortled as he felt the movement beneath his hand.

"Sorry, didn't mean to distract you." Abigail then said, nodding and watching Dutch blink and remember why he actually came back.

"Oh! Sorry my dear, but I must requisition these two. I saw some massive pike in the river, you two wanna come with me to fetch 'em for Pearson?" He inquired.

"Sure, I always love a good fishing trip." Hosea replied with a nod, though Arthur looked to Abigail with a critical gaze, he didn't like leaving her for too long.

"Go on Arthur." She then chuckled, bumping his elbow with hers as she picked her weight up off of him.

"You sure?" He asked, seeing Hosea and Dutch share a look in the corner of his eye.

"Arthur. Go. I'm sure I'll be fine for one more afternoon." She then said before gently shoving him off the log that they were sitting upon and sending a smile to him.

Caving in, knowing that Abigail wouldn't accept his staying, Arthur then nodded and looked to Dutch to lead the way. Climbing on all their horses, Dutch announced that he Hosea and Arthur were going to be gone for a while before they began trotting away. After a few moments, Hosea and Dutch looked to one another again before chuckling softly.

"What?" Arthur asked.

"Nothin', it's just that, you? Asking permission to leave camp?" Dutch teased in good humor, making Arthur's cheeks burn crimson.

"That's not what that was." Arthur growled.

"It's cute for someone as big and dumb as yourself Arthur, maybe even heartwarming." Hosea cackled.

"I swear to god I'll turn around right now." Arthur threatened.

"Alright, alright." Dutch acquiesced, glancing over and sending a playful wink at him, which didn't help his blush either.

In truth, it had been a long while since Arthur had freely left camp and he definitely needed it, and being with Dutch and Hosea just made life so much sweeter to have their attention to himself. While Arthur wasn't someone who necessarily needed _attention_ , it was nice to cut loose and relive old times with them... But this time felt a little different. It was the first time the three had gone out alone with one another since John had disappeared.

They had set up on the shoreline of the closest river where Dutch had seen their dinner and while they had laughed and joked and reminisced... When there was silence, Arthur could feel it in the air.

"Thank you for comin' with my today my friends." Dutch finally sighed. "Tell ya'll the truth, I was feelin' suffocated back there, I can't imagine how you feel Arthur." He mused.

"Ah, Abigail's alright... If anything I probably suffocate her." Arthur chuckled in reply.

"You took to each other pretty well, weren't you two together before-..." Hosea paused in the middle of his statement as John came to mind, and once more a silence consumed the air, but eventually, Arthur breathed out as well.

"Yeah, but she made her choice then... I wasn't offended." He replied without mentioning _his_ name.

Dutch and Hosea had mostly gotten over their anger towards their other son, even though the loss and sadness still remained. Arthur on the other hand... He didn't know what he was but it felt like bitter and angry didn't even come close to what seethed through his pores whenever he thought of John.

"Good for you... You both seem happy." Dutch commented, making Arthur tense up and wish the subject would get off of him.

He knew he made Abigail happy, in fact, he went out of his way to do so but... It wasn't that he wasn't happy with her but he wasn't... _Complete_ with her. He had experienced a pure perfect love with John and there was nothing that could replicate that... And that was why Arthur _hated_ him for it.

"New subject." He finally groaned and shook his head, hearing both his mentors chortle again and feeling Dutch's hand gently land on his back for some momentary support on the matter.

They talked about Annabelle and Bessie, and even though Hosea had finally saved himself after his wife's death, there was still sadness that resided behind his eyes when he spoke of her, and Dutch too... It made a pit form in Arthur's gut because... He didn't feel that way about Abigail, he loved her, there was no question about it but he wasn't _in love_ with her. He was able to appreciate and satisfy her, and they definitely had sex while Abigail was pregnant before her stomach was too in the way... But he wasn't able to give himself fully to her, and the reason for that made a deep fear settle in him because he wasn't ready to face that, maybe ever.

Thankfully before long, their rods began to move and Dutch wasn't lying about the size of the fish, during that afternoon alone they had caught enough to feed them for the night and then some and were able to talk about the game plan while they were there. Dutch figure it was best not to make too many big moves for at least a couple of months after the baby was born since travel was already hard on Abigail while she was pregnant, and after maybe go further east. Arthur wasn't exactly excited about the direction since the further east they got the shittier the weather and the shittier the people.

However, they weren't able to settle on a direct place because as the sun began to signal that evening would be falling soon, the thudding of hooves began to pad from not far off. On instinct, Arthur rested a hand on his sidearm as he, Hosea and Dutch turned to greet the possible foes, there was definitely more than one, but when Mac and Davey showed up to greet them, Arthur arched a brow.

"What're you boys doin' here?" Dutch inquired.

"We were told to come get ya'll cause I guess Abigail's havin' the baby." Davey said nonchalantly with his brother in tow, they almost never went anywhere without one another.

"What!?" Arthur snapped.

"Don't ask questions, let's go!" Hosea scoffed.

Within minutes the trio had all the food their things packed back up and were all galloping back toward camp. Arthur's heart was racing and he couldn't help but feel stupid for leaving. Despite the fact that he didn't want to admit it, he really wanted to be there when the baby was born to be sure Abigail was alright, more importantly... It was happening... The baby was coming, he was going to be a father again-

_**BA-BUMP.** _

A sharp pain hit Arthur in the chest, no... He wasn't, this was Abigail's baby, he had to remember that. He was supporting her but he wasn't that kid's father... Right? Arthur recalled the conversation he and Abigail had just weeks after John had left.

_I can't promise you anythin' Abigail._

_I know..._

_I'm sorry..._

_I know..._

_C-Can you say something besides you know?_

_Arthur... Look I'm not gonna try and change you, I tried for far too much of my life tryin' to change men and look where it got me? Just... Don't start nothin' you can't finish._

She had said the same thing to John...

Arthur took a deep breath recalling they also had sex that night too... But he made a point to stay away from her at least for a few nights a week to make sure there was no mistake, that they weren't together at least officially. He just knew he had to figure it out before the kid got too invested in him.

"How the hell did you find us?" Dutch inquired curiously to Davey as sweat formed at Arthur's brow.

"I tracked you." Davey replied simply.

"You hunt, Davey?" Hosea asked.

"A little here and there, Mac is better than me but he made me do it so I could get better at it."

Interesting. Arthur was thankful for the distraction and plus he found out some information about Mac and Davey, they sure weren't close yet but they didn't have beef with each other either, only now it was time to worry about how long it took them to track the trio down. Arthur just hoped they weren't too late.

It wasn't more than fifteen minutes before they could hear Abigail's cries echoing from camp, which made Arthur kick The Admiral harder. When they arrived back, it seemed as if the girls were inside Abigail's tent helping with Susan while the men, while acting nonchalant, were listening out for Abigail. It was obvious when Bill would glance over while cleaning his gun or Javier pick his head up while tuning his guitar, and Uncle would cringe when she wailed.

Quickly getting off The Admiral, Arthur glanced over to Pearson who was leaning against his caravan.

"Hey, Pearson, we got some gifts for ya." He called, seeing the other glance over and perk up before walking toward them. "Would you unload my horse?" He then asked as he got closer.

"Yeah of course." The other replied as he reached into the saddlebag to pull out the fish carefully one by one.

Arthur tried not to appear like he was rushing, but he jaunted toward the fire where Javier was sitting and stood near him, reaching into his satchel and lighting a cigarette.

"How is she?" He asked, offering one to the bronze-skinned man beside him.

"Been like this for about half an hour... She reached up to grab something off the clothesline and her water broke." Javier explained as he took the tobacco stick.

Nodding, Arthur gulped as he heard Abigail scream again, he could also hear Susan saying things to her but he was too far away to hear exactly what she was saying. Arthur just tried to steady his breathing and keep an eye on the tent entrance, eventually, Tilly jogged out and over to the clothesline, yanking off a towel and rushing back inside. Unable to stand it anymore, inhaling some of the tobacco he slowly walked toward her tent and stood about ten feet away from the entrance just to make sure no smoke made it's way inside, but close enough to listen inside.

"We're almost there honey, I can see the head." Susan said.

"I-I can't do this! I can't do this!" Abigail whimpered.

"Yes, you can sweetheart! You can! Karen wipe her forehead!" Susan ordered.

Arthur's hands nearly started to tremble as he took another drag off his cigarette. It was really happening...

"Alright! Push Abigail! Push!"

Another yell made its way out of the tent.

"There we go! Come on keep goin'!" Susan encouraged.

Arthur knew childbirth was painful, but to hear Abigail scream and cry in pain hurt his heart, and only made him feel worse for doing this to her. However, once the sun had finally disappeared from the night sky, all at once, Abigail's shouting and sobbing ceased... And Arthur's heart stopped as his head snapped in the direction of her tent. It was quiet for multiple minutes and at first, Arthur didn't think he could take it... But then the soft wails of a newborn baby emitted pitifully and Arthur reached up to rub his eyes as relief tore through his body.

Hearing the baby cries made everyone start gathering around, it was a new life after all. Dutch stood next to Arthur and waited patiently, sensing the radiating anxiety still exuding off his partner, he reached up and patted his back gently for a moment until Susan and the girls finally walked out.

"How is she?" Hosea inquired.

"She'll be just fine... Don't go crowdin' her now she needs rest, one at a time." She instructed.

With the relief that both Abigail and the baby were safe and sound, one anxiety was replaced with another... And that was the fact that the baby was in there... Really there.

"You wanna go see her?" Dutch asked, glancing over, but Arthur went rigid.

"N-No I'm fine. I'm sure I'll see her later tonight." He replied, knowing he wasn't ready yet.

Arching a brow, Dutch dropped it for Arthur's sake remembering his past after all. He knew it must've been hard for Arthur despite his relationship to Abigail and eventually left his side to go see the baby, he and Hosea were first and eventually the Reverend, Uncle, Pearson, Javier and finally, even Bill walked inside to see her, though he didn't stay long.

Arthur sighed, wishing he could check the time and suddenly feeling a heart-wrenching sadness he hadn't felt in a long time... He hadn't broken down about John in a while, and if things with Abigail hadn't gone perfectly he might have again, but he took a breath and reached up to rub his eyes tiredly. He knew it was wrong not to go see her... Glancing to the tent, Arthur stared at it for the longest time.

It must have been an hour now, the sky was completely black... Taking a breath, Arthur started forward and while he paused when he was just outside, he bit the bullet and ducked inside. The sight that greeted him warmed his heart and made all of his guilt and self-loathing melt away at least for the moment... She was sitting there, leaning against a makeshift headboard with a multitude of pillows keeping her comfortable. Susan and the girls had changed the bedding as well as helped Abigail change before allowing her visitors to provide her with dignity... But her hair was touselled, her eyes were exhausted and her smile was nothing short of joy and love, she was glowing now more than ever with her expression.

When she looked up to Arthur, the air around them paused... But Abigail couldn't deny being glad Arthur was there. Dark circles had encapsulated her usually fierce eyes but if Arthur was being honest, he had never seen her look any more beautiful.

"Hey." She eventually simpered, flashing a grin at him.

"Hey..." Arthur replied, fidgeting slightly in place.

"You're just on time... I gotta wake him up to feed him." She chuckled softly, it was inherently cute to see how nervous Arthur was.

"... Him?" Arthur eventually asked as his feet began to move for him, slowly approaching the bedside as Abigail carefully tilted the baby in her arms so that Arthur could get a good view of him.

"Him." She confirmed softly before she gently scooted over and patted the spot beside her so that Arthur could sit.

Blinking, part of Arthur wanted to run, he wanted to run as far away as he possibly could... But seeing the tiny pink baby nestled in Abigail's grasp, it was too sweet a sight to give up. He had forgotten just how small and delicate they were, he had probably only seen a couple of babies in his life not even including his first son, so to see this boy...

"Wow." Arthur whispered quietly before taking the offered seat next to Abigail carefully, not wanting to disturb the child.

Looking over, Abigail smiled before she glanced back to the baby and with just the very slightest touch with the tip of her finger, to the baby's nose... Tired eyes began to fluttered though he seemed reluctant, only making Abigail giggle quietly as she then began to caress the newborn's cheek with the pad of her thumb until bright blue eyes opened up and looked dead ahead at Abigail and Arthur...

Suddenly it was all clear... There was no denying it anymore, Arthur knew it as soon as the baby had opened his eyes, that familiar feeling of a deep love that one only had with their own, it was like a feeling almost unlike any Arthur had ever experienced... His second son.

Releasing a slow breath, Abigail just smiled as her fingers gently ran through the soft head of hair that the newborn adorned.

"Hello, Jack." She whispered, watching the baby blink.

"Jack... I like that." Arthur mused softly before an arm slowly came out to wrap around Abigail. "He ain't cryin'... That normal?" Arthur then asked, tilting his head down at the little whelp.

"I'm sure he will." Abigail giggled softly before there was another quietness in the air.

Soon, Abigail looked back to Arthur again... And her eyes reflected nothing but that same warmth that beat hard in Arthur's chest as his mind tried to deny what was right there in front of him, but even though he _wanted_ this to be wrong, he _wanted_ this baby to be John's...

"... He looks like his daddy." She stated with a tender smile up at Arthur before turning her gaze back to Jack... And she was right.

It was one of the few times that Abigail had given Arthur that title in private, and he could feel the raging battle within him, the love that he felt was being overcome by his fear and he could feel his heart pounding, but once he felt Abigail lean against him he relaxed and he just held her close.

"You mind if I feed him?" Abigail then asked, breaking the silence to Arthur's relief.

"Of course not." Arthur replied.

"Good cause I'm not moving." Abigail chuckled before she reached up and carefully exposed one of her breasts so that she could feel her curiously content baby.

Arthur quickly glanced to the doorway of the tent to make sure it was shut properly so that Abigail had some privacy as she angled Jack toward her chest. He latched on without much of a fuss and suckled greedily. Reaching down, unable to help himself any longer, Arthur delicately ran a thumb over Jack's forehead and soon ran his fingers through the feather-light mop of dark hair that adorned his head. It was so soft, softer than anything Arthur had ever felt... Which only solidified his urge to protect this baby with his life, how was something so tiny and adorable capable growing into someone like him..?

Gulping, Arthur glanced over to Abigail whose eyes had shut peacefully as she laid against Arthur and for once, Arthur managed to shut off the irrational, fearful, and bitter thoughts that usually ran through his head... For one night... Arthur would enjoy being a father.

Leaning over, Arthur planted a soft kiss on Abigail's head and she responded by sighing in contentment and leaning her head further inward to almost nuzzle into Arthur's neck, it was soon obvious that she was snoozing despite feeding the baby... And it was cute. Finally, an open smile slowly spread over Arthur's expression as he watched Jack guzzle happily. Releasing a small puff of breath out of amusement at the hungry baby, he shook his head before gently resting it on top of Abigail's, only when the baby begin to wiggle and fidget in Abigail's grasp did her eyes flutter back open.

"Sorry Arthur..." She moaned quietly against him.

"Don't be." He whispered to her. "You did good."

Smiling exhaustedly once more, Abigail managed to put her breast away, though a thought came to her. Looking over to Arthur with only a slightly worried expression she decided to ask her question anyway.

"You wanna hold him..?"

_**BA-BUMP.** _

Blinking, Arthur inhaled slowly as he quickly looked from Abigail to the baby, in all truth he was worried he'd break him somehow, but reminding himself that he had tonight to relish being Jack's father, he finally nodded. His heart fluttered when he saw the optimistic look cross over Abigail's features and he gently unraveled himself from her and prepared himself as Abigail sat up a little bit and turned herself toward him before she slowly transferred the baby boy into Arthur's arms... And seeing the way his gaze looked down at the wiggling bundle of joy, for just a split moment... Abigail could have sworn she saw tears gathering in his eyes.

Arthur was never one to pride himself on being good with children, naturally, they liked him for one reason or the next but he himself had issues dealing with them for obvious reasons, but he was nothing but calm as he held Jack, it felt natural... Right even, it felt like this was _exactly_ where he was supposed to be... With Jack in his grasp. When the bright ocean hues of the inquisitive baby met Arthur's it felt like he was looking into himself and he wasn't sure if it should scare him or not.

"... He's beautiful." Arthur finally breathed, reaching up with a free hand to carefully brush some of the blanket out of the way to get the best view he could.

"He has your eyes..." Abigail commented with a grin, seeing the pride flourish in Arthur's gaze.

"He does..." He confirmed, his smile falling momentarily, though as he felt Abigail's hand rest on his thigh for some support, he glanced over just in time to see her smile at him.

It was at that moment... That Arthur knew he couldn't do this. Because right then at that moment, in Arthur's heart... It had felt like they were a family there in that tent, and he wasn't a family man, he never was and Arthur knew deep down he never could be no matter how much he wanted it, and dammit he wanted it... But Abigail deserved far better than him, someone who could give her their soul and all of their demons... Abigail couldn't handle him.

It was somewhat relieving to finally come to a decision, but he couldn't help but feel the sadness deep in his heart as Arthur looked back down at Jack. He would continue to support them in any way possible that he could but... He could only be Jack's father for tonight, the boy deserved that much on the day of his birth, even if he wouldn't remember it.

When he looked back to Abigail, Arthur smiled seeing that she was asleep again despite her hand still resting on his leg. Taking a breath, Arthur carefully stood with Jack and looked down to him once more... It was time for him to go... It was late, and it was time for Arthur to remove himself from this family that he had no business being apart of even though it felt like he was taking off one of his limbs by doing so.

Finally leaning down, Arthur placed the smallest of kissed atop the boy's head.

"... No matter what, your daddy loves you." He whispered to Jack with a small proud smile before glancing behind him to Abigal. "... But you gotta be better than me, and take care of your mama." He explained, watching Jack yawn too adorably for his heart to handle and he snickered softly. "I'm borin' you I know..." He said before turning to the bassinet that had been placed in Abigail's tent not longer than a few weeks ago before carefully kneeling beside it and placing Jack down slowly.

Arthur was pleased to see that Jack was such a tame baby, he was certain that would change in time but before he could slip out of the tent he paused and looked back to Abigail who slept peacefully and Jack in his bassinet... And Arthur knew he was a fool to turn this down but... He had always been a fool for love.

Despite the warmth residing in Arthur's eyes, he ducked out of the tent.


	2. Can You Break?

_September 19th, 1895_

_I think it's safe to assume that my dread about children is coming to a bitter end thanks to Jack. Staying away from him is proving a lot harder said than done, the kid is smart... At just four months old he knows who all of us are, and to no one's surprise... I'm his favorite._

_Abigail has been real good about it, why, I'm not really sure. I didn't think I could handle this, Jack, with her but... Every time she looks at me with that smile, I feel like I could actually be better... That maybe I could change. I know it's not smart to bet all on a losing horse like me but she makes me_ _want_ _to be better, and maybe that's enough?_

The familiar sound of a wailing Jack caught Arthur's attention not far off. He knew he was right when he assumed that Jack would find his voice and he indeed used it, but he wasn't a hard baby either all things considered. He recalled when Jack was born that he had wanted to take a step back, but... He promised that he would support Abigail _and_ Jack, which meant that those three nights a week that he _still_ spent with Abigail, often time he was up helping with Jack so that Abigail could get some much-needed rest.

To say Abigail was a good mother was a complete understatement, despite her past, she took up mothering almost instantly and her intuition was always spot on. It was almost scary how accurate she was, but overall it was impressive and knowing he couldn't stay away for too long when he heard that pitiful little cry, Arthur carefully shut his journal and slipped out of his tent that he was currently hiding in, glancing to his right to the tent next to his that held Abigail and Jack, he made the short trip before pausing outside.

"Need help in there?" Arthur asked, making a point never to barge in uninvited.

"When have I ever?" Abigail replied from inside, making a small subtle smile cross over Arthur's expression. "But if you're looking for an excuse to come in you don't need one." She then added, seeming to know Arthur better than himself more and more every day.

Rolling his eyes before ducking in, when he did so he was greeted with the sight with Abigail gently rocking and shushing baby Jack who was whimpering and whining unhappily in her grasp. She then began to gently pat his back and encourage him to burp as Arthur came closer and eventually walked around to see Jack's face. Like clockwork, as soon as Jack's baby blues landed on Arthur's all crying ceased and he stared at him like he was a unicorn and no matter how much Arthur denied that he loved it, he couldn't help but snicker as Abigail turn to look at him incredulously.

"... How do you do that?" She asked.

"Dunno, kids just like me." He replied, watching as Abigail gently pulled Jack down from her shoulder and back into her arms.

"Will you hold him? I've been tryin' to find his hat that Miss Grimshaw made him for fifteen minutes but he just won't let me focus long enough to look for it." She sighed, looking to Arthur with an apologetic expression and sighing with relief when Arthur shrugged and held out his arms.

Arthur couldn't help the unbelievable hard tug at his heartstrings as Jack grinned wildly and reached for him when Abigail began to hand him over and Arthur chuckled in response. He still kept himself at bay so that Jack didn't start recognizing him as his father but he _loved_ how much Jack seemed to love him regardless of his fatherhood or not. Despite that, Arthur knew that in the end, this would bite him in the ass but... It was worth it.

Abigail quickly turned away from Arthur and began surfing through a few strewn out belongings in the enclosed tent before she eventually grabbed a dress and reached into the pocket, breathing a sigh of relief when she pulled out the red knitted cap that protected Jack's ears from the cold and his scalp from the sun. Turning back to Arthur and Jack, she stepped up to them before carefully slipping the soft hat onto Jack's head. However, as she did so, there was a small hitch in the air as Arthur looked down to her... And she looked up to him, their gazes met and the air stilled around them, even as Jack gently wriggled happily in Arthur's hold.

Blinking, Abigail blushed and swallowed before averting her gaze back down and carefully straightening the hat on Jack's head and regaining her wits as Arthur continued to watch her. It was hard to resist her at times, Arthur was careful not to seek too much affection with her just because he didn't want her to think there was something there that wasn't... Sex was one thing, affection and love are another, but for the first time in a long while, Arthur broke one his rules and carefully reached down and angled her chin up carefully before leaning in and gently pressing his lips against hers just for the hell of it.

She gasped slightly in surprise, but she relaxed into the gesture, and though Arthur didn't hold her there long, he reached up and gently ran his fingers through her hair carefully as he just appreciated her for a moment.

"... Sorry." He then whispered softly, watching a small sweet smile creep up on Abigail's features.

"What for..?" She simpered as Arthur briefly readjusted the energetic baby in his grasp before shrugging.

"I know you don't like bein' snuck up on like that." He replied simply with a small smile of his own before taking his hand away and handing Jack back to his mother despite his protest, though he was much calmer now.

"... Thank you, Arthur." She then said, nodding seriously, and though she wasn't descript on what, Arthur nodded back before taking his leave and ducking back out of the tent.

They had just made their first big move last week, though it had only taken a couple of hours to arrive at their next location after stopping from their trip down from Montana, Dutch decided they needed a more centralized location if they wanted to both lay low and make their move when the time was finally right. They were still a good hours ride away from any town, small or otherwise, Dutch and Hosea had picked this location in particular because they were in the center of three distinct towns.

There was Wolf's Trail, which was the most popular hunting and trading town in a hundred miles despite it being no larger than a modern outpost, a lot of money went through there with pelt sales being at an all-time high in the area. Then there was Airedale which held the highest quality and quantity of livestock in the area, there were multiple families with competing ranches around which only dealt with a _single_ bank in town. Last but surely not least Copper Lake, which ironically had been booming with a gold mine in the area, Arthur had recalled being disappointed when they had arrived in the once gold-paved streets of Virginia City only to find out the mine had all but begun drying up, knowing that there was a good surplus of gold in the area, Dutch was sure they could figure out how and where they were moving it.

Arthur inhaled slowly before walking forward, reaching into his bag and pulling out a cigarette, lighting it and taking a sharp drag, just knowing that Dutch would propose robbing all three instead of sticking to the most reliable and _possible_ of the three towns. Though he was thankful knowing there were no plans in the immediate future to do anything like that while Jack was still small, there was plenty of reliable and _legal_ work available to them, there was no excuse in being arrested.

Dutch simply put it as: if he didn't know about their crimes, he didn't care about it as long as no one pulled anything major, and as long as everything was kept clean, no deaths. Besides, they had _a lot_ of work to do before they could even begin to formulate where to strike first... And in reality, they were in no rush, they could take their time for once. They had been extra careful in the last nine or so months since they had fled Virginia City. Whatever law that had been chasing them had been gone for a long time, and even with Dutch killing the Chief of Police, Ivy Winter's had helped them a great deal by making sure their names weren't brought up in correlation... It was as if they had never been there, to begin with.

Josiah had decided to stay behind and be with Ivy for a while though they had seen him on multiple occasions since the Van der Lide gang had disappeared, he usually corresponded with Dutch on the amount of attention they had, whether the law was still pursuing them. Though as of recent, there had only been whispers of the notorious band of outlaws, which unsettled Dutch... He never said it, but Arthur knew it tore Dutch up a little to look like they had just vanished off the earth without cause or meaning, but he was putting the needs of the gang above his own, and Arthur was proud of him for it.

"Hey, Arthur."

_Speak of the devil._

Turning, Arthur watched as Dutch approached with his pipe in hand.

"Mornin'." He replied casually, nodding to the other.

"You finally decided where you're headin' first?" Dutch inquired curiously with a small smile of amusement as Arthur rolled his eyes, he had been having trouble figuring out if he wanted to go try for bounties in Copper Lake or go see if there were ranches that needed volunteers in Airedale, typically it was easier than being shot at by an angry outlaw.

"... Think I'm gonna head to head to Airedale first, I might have to fight some horses or steers but at least they can't shoot back." He sighed with a small nod before rolling his neck and glancing back to Dutch. "You?"

"You know I can't stay away from that gold, Hosea either." He chortled.

"You sure you're gonna behave yourselves?" Arthur snorted softly, arching a brow.

"Of course, we'll be perfect gentlemen, but I _have_ to know that there's a way to find out where they're stashing it, and who their clients are... Could prove useful in the future." Dutch explained with a nod, and truth be told it was smart.

Though, if there was one thing Arthur was doing first, it was going to a damn bar. He had been running himself very, very thin lately, and even if he'd never take it out on Abigail or the baby, he needed to get away and be _alone_.

"What about the others?" Arthur inquired curiously, hoping to avoid anyone for at least a few hours.

"Well, Bill, Javier, and Uncle was talkin' bout headin' to Wolf's Trail to see if there was anything there worth looking into, and the Callander's mentioned heading to Copper Lake." Dutch replied with a nod which ultimately solidified Arthur's decision to go to Airedale, looking up Dutch could see Hosea disembark from his tent and wave him over. "Looks like that's my cue, remember Arthur, stay outta trouble." Dutch reminded more playfully than anything.

"Yeah back'atcha." Arthur scoffed with a smile before shaking his head and watching his two mentors mount their horses and disembark on their respective plans.

Reaching into his satchel, Arthur paused... Even now... _Nine_ _months later..._ And Arthur still reached for his watch. Sighing, Arthur looked around wondering who was still here. Seeing the Reverend actually sitting down and reading his bible for once, Arthur approached him.

"Hey, Reverend, you got the time?" He asked, watching Swanson look up briefly when his focus was broken though he reached into his breast pocket and pulled out his own watch before observing the face.

"It's 10:15, Mister Morgan." He replied evenly, Arthur nodded in response with a small huff knowing he needed to get going soon.

"Thank you." He muttered, allowing the burnt cigarette to fall from his lips and crushing it with his boot.

Arthur only spared a glance at Abigail's and Jack's tent before trudging up to The Admiral and climbed atop his saddle. Reaching down, Arthur patted the silver horse's massive neck, feeling the horse shift underneath him in excitement for the run that he knew Arthur would provide him with. Looking up to turn his horse accordingly, he was just in time to see Abigail and Jack slip outside, making him pause.

Looking around momentarily and finally turning in his direction, Abigail smiled before she reached down and gently took Jack's tiny hand and carefully waved it at Arthur with a small giggle as Jack squawked with glee. It was truly a sight that Arthur cherished and he couldn't help smiling back and reaching up to tip his hat at Abigail before leading The Admiral away from camp and kicking his sides.

* * *

When Arthur trotted into town, he wasn't disappointed. It was fairly large but it wasn't anywhere near the cesspool like Virginia City. There was a handful of everything, bars, hotels, stores, and more though there was nothing unnecessary. Everything had a purpose and this town was a functioning society, and thanks to that, the likelihood of anything more than local deputy sheriffs were slim to none, and the fact that there was indeed only one bank in town made this all easier.

As Arthur passed by the said bank, he looked over at it, analyzing it briefly as he rode by. It didn't look like anything fancy, but it was a decent-sized, easily a place to take seriously and consider it a viable option for success despite the unpredictability of rural banks. The town was clean which only made Arthur curious what the dynamic was like between the three towns in the area, but at least they knew there was money here, enough to keep the town tidy and support a multitude of businesses.

Taking his eyes away from the bank, Arthur began his search for the closest saloon. At this time of day, he was most likely to be left alone by other patrons and he could have a couple of drinks before looking for work. Finally pulling up to a single story establishment, Arthur tied The Admiral down and looked over his coat for a moment. Maybe whoever he ended up working for wouldn't mind him using their tools to groom his horse after he was finished...

Reaching up, Arthur ran his hand down his reliable mount's nose before turning away and walking into the tavern. As Arthur had predicted, there weren't many people here, and those who were, were passed out drunk from the night before or weren't drunk enough yet to cause an issue, but Arthur was pleased to see that there was someone available playing piano. He didn't get to appreciate music as much as he wanted to, and he rarely was alone long enough to really listen to it, even if it were a simple tune on the piano.

Approaching the bar, Arthur waved down the bartender before taking a seat at the stool provided.

"Beer please." He ordered before placing a few coins down and waiting patiently, nodding his thanks to the man when his beverage was brought to him.

He brought the alcohol to his lips and took a few generous swigs before allowing the bottle to lower from his lips. Arthur then allowed his eyes to flutter shut as he slowly started to decompress and enjoy the light tune that played in the background. He felt mentally exhausted all the time and having to be strong so Abigail didn't have to be, it took a lot out of him. She was a good woman and she always held herself with grace, but for the first few months after John had left, every now and again she'd lose it and it would be up to Arthur to bring her back.

Thankfully though since Jack had been born, she had been nothing short of joyous even when Jack utterly exhausted her. She was happy and Arthur would do whatever he could to make sure she stayed that way, even if it cost him his own happiness, it wasn't like he deserved it anyway.

Quickly bringing himself out of the darkness that had begun to shroud his mind, Arthur brought the bottle back up to his lips and continued drinking at a moderate pace until he tipped the bottle upside down and placed it back down onto the counter. He wanted another, but considering where his thoughts were heading he knew it was probably a good idea to walk away, or at least give it time before getting another since he wasn't quite ready to deal with other people again.

However, a small _clack_ on the wood of the counter caught Arthur's attention, making him open his eyes to see a small glass of some kind of suspected alcohol in front of him. Arching a brow, Arthur looked up at the bartender with confusion.

"Uh... I didn't order this." he muttered.

"I know, he did." The bartender replied, motioning down to the other side of the bar.

When Arthur looked up, he noted a slender young man, short and wavy sandy blonde hair, and striking gray eyes. Immediately, Arthur felt suspicious... It wasn't like people to order him drinks, especially men and since he had a record and a price on his head in several states... It was unwise to drink a randomly offered beverage before feeling out the person who provided him with it. Getting up, Arthur took the glass and began to meander toward the other, though as Arthur got closer, the more he began to wonder how old the other man was, he looked considerably younger than Arthur... Perhaps even younger than John.

"Hope you didn't mind, you looked like a bourbon man." The stranger mused as Arthur got close, making Arthur grow increasingly uncomfortable when the other revealed what he had ordered... It was his favorite after all.

"Perhaps..." Arthur replied before leaning against the bar and looking over the man again.

Judging from his voice and complexion, Arthur figured it was safe to assume he didn't smoke, his tone was clear and... If Arthur was completely honest, despite resembling a teenager in some ways, he was attractive... Clearing his throat, Arthur turned his attention back to his beverage.

"What's the occasion?" He then inquired curiously, tilting his head down at the mystery man.

"Oh, nothin'... Most folk who come in here around this time are either miserable drunks or new... And I was curious." The other chuckled, his friendly demeanor putting Arthur somewhat to ease before motioning to the stool positioned next to him.

"You mind?"

"O'course not, go ahead."

Taking his seat, Arthur finally reached down and took a sip of the already paid-for beverage. It was bourbon after all, and it was a _good_ bourbon. After the initial sample, Arthur then didn't hesitate on throwing it back and taking down what remained, swallowing the harsh liquid with a neutral expression.

"Thanks." he then stated, looking over to see an amused expression across the other man's face.

"... Was I wrong to assume you were different than the miserable drunks I mentioned before?" He asked, actually making a smile creep up on Arthur's expression.

"You were." He replied with a small chuckle of his own before his eyes landed back onto the man next to him, his eyes were truly gorgeous, it made not staring difficult. "You got a name..?"

"Oh, sorry. Name's Vincent, Vincent Taylor." The other introduced, holding a hand out to Arthur.

"Arthur Callahan." Arthur replied smoothly before reaching out and taking the offered hand, grasping it firmly and shaking it.

All at once, Arthur wondered how he hadn't even noticed the other man come in. He was different than the others Arthur had seen wallowing in their self-pity, he was alert, and far friendlier than Arthur was expecting. Part of him still wanted to be suspicious but with the short interaction he had with Vincent, he felt that nagging sense of paranoia begin to fade.

"You are new around here though, aren't you?" Vincent inquired curiously as he waved down the bartender. "Two more bourbons please." He then ordered.

"How could you tell?" Arthur asked back.

"Well, I've lived here all my life, my pa owns the ranch down the way North of town... I can usually tell when I've never seen someone." Vincent mused.

"How old even are you?" Arthur snorted. "Doubt you've lived on _earth_ long enough."

"This again." Vincent chortled to himself. "That's another reason I know you ain't from here... Lemme guess, you're about to tell me I look like a kid right?" Vincent questioned with a smile nonetheless, and Arthur shrugged and nodded as their drinks were delivered to them. "I'm actually twenty-three." The other informed, shocking Arthur to see that the man before him was actually a year _older_ than John.

"Coulda fooled me."

"That's usually the case. Sometimes I think my own parents didn't take me seriously because of how I look." The other explained, rolling his eyes but shrugging. "Is what it is I suppose."

When Arthur took a moment to look over the other man again as he reached down to take a swig of his alcohol, he eventually came to the conclusion that it was believable that Vincent was as old as he said he was. Looking at his frame, while he was smaller than Arthur, was filled out nicely and seeing just a few stray hairs up near his sideburns, he figured the other shaved often.

Quickly clearing his throat as he felt himself beginning to feel creepy, Arthur looked away. It wasn't like the other man mattered much anyway, though as Arthur recalled Vincent mentioning the farm his family ran, he turned his attention back over to him, though making sure to keep his eyes locked on their other's face to keep them from wandering.

"You said you owned a ranch, yeah?" Arthur then asked, watching the other nod. "Well, I did just get into town and I'm lookin' for work. If you need any help I work hard and have some experience with animals." He explained.

Vincent then seemed to look over Arthur, and for the first time in a long while, Arthur almost felt self-conscious with this man's steel gaze. After a few moments though, Vincent seemed to look back to his drink and hum softly.

"You lookin' for short-term or long-term work?"

"Honestly, I'm not sure... Could be a few weeks or a few months." Arthur sighed.

"Hm... Well, my father prefers people who he knows will be reliable at work and in the long run but... I can tell you're good for it, you can help me for the day and if you prove that you're worth keepin' around then... Maybe I can talk to my pa on your behalf." Vincent explained, relieving Arthur.

"I'd appreciate that, thank you." Arthur replied with a nod before the other held up his glass, Arthur took his and gently _clinked_ it with Vincent's before they finished their last beverage.

"Don't thank me yet until I hire you." Vincent chuckled playfully before he stood up. "You got a horse?"

"Of course." Arthur chortled softly before he rose from his stool as well feeling pleasantly warm from the extra alcohol consumption.

"Alright then, you can follow me back." Vincent offered before motioning Arthur to follow him and passed him to walk out the door.

Arthur tried... He really did, but when the other passed him, Arthur's eyes briefly traveled lower to get a look at his nether regions before quickly sweeping back up and cursing his rather juvenile hormones. If he really needed male company he knew he could find it somewhere that wouldn't remember him the next day, and it would be _far_ away from here, but just the thought of paying someone to fulfil his unusual and blasphemous urges was extremely risky... And he wouldn't emotionally invest in someone else again, the price he paid last time was far too great. Blinking, Arthur continued walking and pushed any other unsavory thoughts out of his head before he approached The Admiral and climbed atop him.

"That you're horse?" Vincent asked, seeming more impressed than he was trying to let on as he climbed atop his own.

Arthur watched Vincent approach on a white stallion with an ebony mane and tail, though as he got closer, Arthur could see black slowly cascading down the back of his neck and Arthur tilted his head trying to figure out what breed of horse his companion was riding.

"American Paint." Vincent piped up with a snort as he saw Arthur staring at his horse with determination.

"Really?" Arthur asked, seeming confused.

"Yeah, I'll show you when we get back if you can keep up." Vincent stated, meeting Arthur's eyes and once more Arthur was quick to avert his gaze just to be safe, but he couldn't help the smile on his expression.

"Careful there, The Admiral doesn't take to being insulted." He mentioned, reaching down and patting the huffing beast affectionately.

"The Admiral? There's gotta be a story to that." Vincent said with a grin, though Arthur was quick to feel a major jab in his heart.

_Well, Dutch has The Count, it only makes sense for you to have The Admiral._

"Yeah... Long time ago now." Arthur commented, though he left it at that as he began to follow Vincent to where he'd probably be spending most of his time until they started their diabolical plotting... At least it would be easy work, even it was physically taxing.

As they rode, Arthur couldn't stop his eyes wandering to the man in front of him, he was... Interesting, it had been a long time since he had interacted with someone outside of his little dysfunctional family, and the other was _nice_... Really nice, it was refreshing to actually talk to someone who didn't know all his dirty laundry... And it was nice not to feel the overwhelming sense of guilt that always followed him when he was with Abigail.

The ride probably only took them ten minutes if that, and as they rode they talked, mostly just about nothing, but Arthur could see the ranch in the distance once they rode outside of town, it was _massive_. It took acres upon acres of land and Arthur understood why the other wasn't so discriminant on hiring help but wanted people for the long haul.

"Holy shit." Arthur couldn't help but marvel slightly once they rode through the large gates that actually had armed guards stationed upfront-.

"I take it you haven't been to a statewide operation?" Vincent inquired with a grin.

"Nothin' like this... Times are really changin'." Arthur remarked, though quickly looking to Vincent. "Sorry, I hope I didn't offend you, this is just definitely the biggest farm I've ever been to." He explained but Vincent shook his head once they pulled up to a hitching post outside one of the multiple corrals on the property.

"You didn't don't worry, I get it. We handle all the cattle and sheep in the region but do business with multiple clients throughout the state, we even have some people who come from states away." He mentioned as he reached up to unbuckle his horse's saddle. "We also deal with horses but that's more of a hobby."

It was then that Arthur caught the coat pattern of Vincent's horse and for an American Paint, he was a stunning specimen with a blanket of obsidian splashing over his ivory back and dripping down like an oil slick. Arching his brows momentarily as he stepped up to the front of the horse and offered his hand for the other to sniff at.

"I suppose I'll have to learn to stop doubting you." Arthur mentioned. "I ain't ever seen a Paint like this one, where the hell did you get him?"

"Honestly? It was luck... I mean, we've always been good with our animals but this guy was born completely by chance. It was _accidental_ breeding." He snorted with a smile as he patted the horse's side once he had hung the saddle up on the post.

Arthur chuckled softly with Vincent, of course, it was an accident, animals this beautiful didn't come along very often and not by modern design. He often wondered what The Admiral's lineage was but he knew he'd never figure it out.

"So, Arthur, where do you feel most comfortable?" Vincent then inquired, walking around his horse and leaning against his post as he looked at Arthur curiously.

"Depends, I'm a decent enough herder but if you want somethin' more hands-on, horses are better for me." Arthur replied evenly, reaching down and mirroring Vincent's movements and unbuckling his horses' saddle as well so he could hang it to dry.

"... Can you break?" Vincent then asked, arching a brow with an almost mischievous little smile.

"Sure can... Why?" Arthur queried in response, resting a hand on his hip.

"... Follow me."

> I had a couple beers with one of my friends  
> Told him just how our story ends  
> Did all I could to try to make it work  
> But you drug my heart through the Alabama dirt  
>   
> I've been out the house, climbin' them walls  
> Checkin' that calendar, exin' days off  
> Hit another bar, call another friend  
> Throw a few down, tell the story again  
>   
> Hey, hey, what can I say?  
> I can just lie and say it's all okay  
> Oh-ho, what can I do?  
> Been goin' through Hell gettin' over you  
> But it don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to  
> No it don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to  
>   
> I'm finally gettin' out back into the world  
> Life is good, I met me a girl  
> She got a beautiful heart, eyes are blue  
> I don't hardly ever think about you  
>   
> Hey, hey, what can I say?  
> I can just lie and say it's all okay  
> Oh-ho, what can I do?  
> Been goin' through Hell gettin' over you  
> But it don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to  
> No it don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to
> 
> Sometimes I find peace of mind in a bottle of wine  
> Sometimes I break down and cry  
>   
> Hey, hey, what can I say?  
> I can just lie and say it's all okay  
> Oh-ho, what can I do?  
> Been goin' through Hell gettin' over you
> 
> Hey, hey, what can I say?  
> I can just lie and say it's all okay  
> Oh-ho, what can I do?  
> Been goin' through Hell gettin' over you  
> But it don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to  
> No it don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to  
> No it don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to
> 
> It don't hurt, it don't hurt like it used to
> 
> source: [It Don't Hurt Like It Used To by Billy Currington](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5jSwgcS7rY)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry this chapter took me a bit of extra time, I had quite a bit of it already typed and ready to go but unfortunately I'm in the midst of some family drama connected to my brief leave from AO3 in April/May (you know what they say, death brings out the best AND worst in people lol), and it's just been brutal trying to put out the fire. I hope the chapters are worth the wait and ya'll like the direction! Thank you all so much as usual for being so supportive and hopefully this shit will be settled sooner rather than later.  
> -Eros


	3. He's Not A Bad Man

Panting, Arthur reached up and wiped the sweat from his brow as the horse beneath him finally stilled in his defiant attempts to throw him, he could hear whooping from his left and chuckled softly, it was the _fifth_ horse in a row and his body felt like it was going to give out from the exhaustion, this stallion was rather spirited as well which only made it more difficult to stay on. Horse breaking was already entertaining to watch and even though Arthur typically didn't like this much attention, with the twelve or so ranch workers that had gathered after his second success, it felt good given how hard this horse fought. Reaching down, Arthur rested his near shaking hand upon the huffing horse's neck as it stood motionless and huffing, it wasn't long before a stable hand walked out and roped the horse so he could dismount.

Vincent was standing at the side, quiet but he was grinning... And Arthur didn't want to admit it, but he _did_ want to impress the other. Carefully slipping off the horse, Arthur's left knee almost buckled but he managed to saunter back to the gate where it opened for him. All at once he could hear words of praise as well as receiving a few pats on the back as he meandered over to a post so he could lean against it.

Arthur then doubled over for a few moments, catching his breath after nodding his thanks to those who spoke to him. He groaned softly, he was getting too old for this... He remembered when he was twenty and he could go on a three-day bender, wake up the next morning, and break horses like it was nothing... Right now he felt as if his arms and legs were going to fall off.

"You alright?" Vincent chuckled as he came approaching, Arthur picked his head up and chortled before shaking his head.

"Just bein' reminded I'm not as young as you are." He snorted in response, watching Vincent roll his eyes playfully and shake his head.

"Oh please, you're actin' like you should be put out to pasture." Vincent replied. "... I _may_ have saved the hardest horse for last." He then added, watching Arthur give him an open look of disbelief, though Vincent laughed at the expression. "C'mon."

Blinking, Arthur managed to follow Vincent toward the farmhouse in the distance. Thankfully as he walked, Arthur regained the feeling in his left hand that he had used to wrap the reins around the palm to keep a grip on it and the pins and needles in his right foot went away making him able to walk normally. However the closer they got to the house the more uncomfortable Arthur felt, what he had noticed specifically about after John left was that he had a thing about being in other people's spaces... Abigail was one thing, but now even being in Dutch's tent for too long made Arthur fidget, and he didn't like others in _his_ space either.

Arthur had secluded himself quite a bit after his protege had left, he spent a fixed amount of time with Abigail when he was able but sometimes he would be isolated in his tent whenever he wasn't out doing work. He had worried both Dutch and Hosea on numerous occasions but like Abigail, he eventually picked himself up and dusted himself off since he didn't really have a choice.

Quickly pushing John from his head, Arthur's stride continued as they walked up to a large front door. Reaching into his back pocket, Vincent pulled out a small set of keys before the door swung open. These people obviously had money, but their home was still modest even if it was a bit larger than most could afford. They walked into a large sitting room with walls that adorned multiple racks from deer, elk, and moose, it was impressive. They kept walking until they dipped into an open archway into the kitchen where a six chaired dining table sat as well as modern kitchen equipment adorned the room, it was nothing to scoff at, if anything this was decent living.

"You can wash your face and sit down. I'll get you something to drink." Vincent offered, motioning to the large sink basin. "Use the towel on the counter."

"Thank you." Arthur replied before placing his hat aside and turning the tap on, he was relieved to feel cool water flow out onto his hands after taking his hat off and placing it aside.

Reaching up Arthur splashed the water into his face and washed the sweat and dirt that had stuck to his skin during the horse's frenzy of motion. When he was finished he grabbed the cloth the other had directed to before carefully wiping the water from his skin, though before he put it down he carefully wet it and wiped the back of his neck as well. He then approached the table before sitting with a small grunt and leaning back to finally rest his aching muscles.

"Here." Vincent offered, setting a glass of lemonade down in front of Arthur before taking a seat at the head of the table next to him.

"Thanks again." Arthur mused tiredly before reaching forward and taking a few much-needed swallows.

"So, you ain't curious why I screwed you over with the horses?" Vincent asked, arching a small brow at Arthur as he observed him.

"Well, I assumed you had a good reason, and if not I'm too tired to do anything about it." Arthur replied with an exhausted smile as he reached up and slicked his hair back, it had been months since he had cut it, but it was second nature to sweep it back.

"I suppose, honestly I wanted to know if you had what it took... That last one, the chestnut-colored morgan, he's been rather... Well, he's an asshole, ever since his balls dropped." Vincent scoffed as he reached into his pouch and pulled out a flask, handing it over to Arthur.

He had felt pleasantly warm and more limber when he left the saloon, but not any longer. Arthur took the container and twisted the lid before taking a swig, glad that it was whiskey. The pleasant heat traveling down into his stomach was something to focus on besides the pain in his body.

"Why not geld him if he's so much of a problem?" Arthur asked.

"I woulda, but the client who we're selling him too specifically asked us not too." Vincent sighed. "And like I said horses are just kind of a hobby, so it's not an issue if they want to breed him." He explained.

"Well, glad I could be of service." Arthur then snickered, shrugging his shoulders.

"I was actually expecting you to fail... Suppose now it's my turn stop doubtin' you." Vincent replied, looking over at Arthur.

At that moment, their eyes met again and there was a brief pause in the air... Arthur's heart fluttered and he swallowed before averting his gaze and handing the flask back. Vincent's eyes cast down to the item before reaching out, and while it was unintentional, their fingers brushed just momentarily as he pulled the flask away and it felt like a bolt of lightning had hit the tip of Arthur's index finger.

_Uh oh._

Clearing his throat quickly, Arthur pulled his hand back casually enough and finished the refreshing lemonade.

"Thank you for this, really." He then said, needing to break the silence in the room.

"Well, you earned it." Vincent chuckled. "How're your legs?"

"I can finally feel 'em." Arthur sighed, reaching down and rubbing his thigh.

"I hope it was worth it, cause with that show I'd be an idiot if I didn't hire you." Vincent then said, showing a bright grin to Arthur. "You work like you did today, I'll pay you handsomely. It won't be official or anything but I assume that won't be a problem."

"Not at all..."

Arthur then took a moment to glance around the kitchen, he could see a few pictures on the wall closest to them. One of them was obviously a family portrait, he could see a man with a beard with his arm around a light-haired woman, and her hand rested on the shoulder of a boy who sat in front of her while the man's hand rested upon another in front of him... There were two boys, and one was undeniably Vincent as a child.

Following his eyes, Vincent looked to the picture as well and once more a silence took over the air, but this time it was a somber silence. When Arthur glanced over again, he could see that Vincent's eyes were locked on the image.

"You got a brother?" Arthur eventually inquired.

"... I did." The other replied with a small sigh before taking another swig of the alcohol.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's alright... It was a fire... Happened last year." Vincent muttered softly, his eyes lowering back down to the table. "... We suspect that a rival family did it but we have no proof, and honestly we don't know who would be that hateful toward us to do it..." He muttered with regret.

"You don't?" Arthur asked with a level of surprise.

"No... I forgot you're new here, in this area, there are about four other ranches this size that have about as much business as we do, and while we may not get along with everyone, we never suspected them to murder half our family." Vincent scoffed with a level of bitterness that Arthur could identify with.

"Half?"

"... Yeah, my mother perished in the flames too." Vincent replied, and all at once, Arthur regretted his questions.

"I lost both my parents when I was real young, but I couldn't imagine that. I'm sorry for your loss." He then said with a nod of sympathy, watching Vincent take a breath, the wound was obviously still fresh in some ways.

"It's alright. They'll get justice one day, I'll see to it." Vincent replied evenly, regaining his composure before it could break.

"Well, I'm an expert there. Unlike you, I didn't have anythin' like this place you got to fall back on, so I knew I had to abandon that otherwise... I'd really be lost." Arthur said with a small shrug, though he could see Vincent looking at him with respect in his eyes.

"That's... Really wise actually." Vincent replied. "You mentioned losing your parents, so I hope I'm not pryin' but do you have any other family?" He asked, and since Arthur had asked callously about the other's personal life he knew he owed it to Vincent to be honest.

"Yeah, I mean not by blood but they're the closest thing to a family as I ever had... My father was a piece o' work and my mother... She died before I could really experience those kinds of family memories. My mentors though, they saved me after I was out on my own they taught me what it was to be a man and... I guess that's all I needed." Arthur explained, seeing Vincent's eyes looking through his, almost as if reading Arthur's words through his eyes.

"They sound like incredible men." Vincent observed.

"They are. A little crazy too, but..." Arthur trailed off with a chuckle, watching a more genuine smile creep back onto Vincent's features, and immediately Arthur felt better at seeing it. "Ever since then we've picked up folk who've lost their way or needed a second chance. We're no army but there's enough of us to never feel alone... _Ever_." Arthur snorted.

"Cramped, huh?" Vincent asked with a small laugh.

"That's an understatement."

"Well, I don't know where the lot of you are stayin' but if you ever want a place to yourself, there's an empty storage room off the side of the house. It's nothin' fancy but it's warm and dry." Vincent offered, pleasantly surprising Arthur despite the guilt he felt at wanting to accept it.

"Thank you, that's kind of you... You always allow strange men to sleep in your house?" Arthur then asked, arching a brow at Vincent with a small smirk and watching the other actually chuckle.

"No. I don't." He replied confidently, though his tone briefly threw Arthur off, his heartbeat rapidly in his chest for a few moments as he regained his wits.

"... Maybe I'll take you up on it sometime." Arthur then replied to his own shock, but thankfully before anything else could be said to rile Arthur's inner demons up, the front door could be heard swinging open and Vincent's head was quick to turn.

"Pa! That you?" He called, getting up from the table.

"Yes." A deep-voiced man replied as the sound of boots against the floor began echoing toward them.

A burly man in a hunting coat walked in with a rifle swung over his back, a handful of envelopes that he was carefully going through when he walked into the kitchen. He sported a large but well-groomed beard and Arthur recognized him immediately from the picture. His stride paused when he looked up and saw Arthur sitting at the table, though he was quick to stand to show his respect.

"Whose this..? New cowboy?" He inquired, seeming unimpressed.

"Yes. I know you said-"

"Vincent I told you, we can't take any chances now with-"

"He ain't from here pa, you should know that and with Graham leaving we need someone with experience... He broke four horses _and_ Reginald." Vincent defended, Arthur could see the older man pause at the mention of the aggressive stallion before eyeing Arthur suspiciously.

"He did, hm?" He asked, seeming unconvinced but despite glaring at his son, the man sighed before looking back to Arthur. "We'll be watchin' you... What's your name?"

"Arthur Callahan, sir." Arthur replied.

"Arthur Callahan... I'll remember that." The man stated before glancing at Vincent with slightly narrowed eyes before turning and heading back out of the kitchen.

Taking a breath, Vincent sighed before looking to Arthur with an apologetic expression.

"Sorry... He's not a bad man."

"No, I understand... Completely." Arthur replied seriously before nodding to Vincent. "I probably shouldn't overstay my welcome... Thank you for the offer on the room but I don't want to put your father out."

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him," Vincent replied. "Besides there's bound to be some days when you're here well into the night... It'll be nice not to have to travel back, just know it still stands." He explained.

"Thank you, I'll keep it in mind... You want me back tomorrow?" Arthur inquired.

"Well, you did me a great service today, seriously I've been trying to tame Reginald for _months_ and I consider myself a half-decent breaker... If you're sore tomorrow or the day after you can just come to see me again at the end of the week. Maybe you can show me how you stay on like that." Vincent mused.

"I can do that." Arthur chortled before nodding and reaching over to the table to grab his hat and placing it where he belonged atop his head.

Sending one last smile Arthur's way, Vincent began to walk Arthur out, and as they walked, Arthur's eyes began to coast over the other man's form again. Arthur knew that at this point he couldn't deny the schoolboy like attraction to the other... Which was odd because Vincent was different than the people Arthur was used to being drawn too. Compared to the people Arthur had been with in the past, Vincent was like a flower though Arthur could tell there was a fiery personality beneath that shouldn't be reckoned with at all costs. Even the way he walked was different... Arthur's eyes locked on his hips and inhaled slowly before forcing himself to be a decent person and look up.

It had been a long time since Arthur had felt these urges pop up, it was true that Dutch sometimes sparked those feelings but they usually went away as soon as they showed up but Vincent... He was something else entirely. Maybe he just needed to find a man with his own type of questionable morals.

Once they arrived outside, Arthur was quick to get out from behind the other since his restraint was minimal. He knew these feelings of attraction would fade soon, besides Vincent seemed like a good man... He didn't want to repeat the same mistakes he had in the past. Reaching over the hitching post, Arthur grabbed his saddle and hoisted it back onto The Admiral who shuffled and fidgeted in place.

"He's got a look to him." Vincent commented with a look of admiration at the horse. "What made you decide on The Admiral?" He questioned, Arthur's movements paused, he had hoped the other had forgotten his question but could figure by now that Vincent was smarter than the people he was used to being around.

"It wasn't my idea." Arthur mentioned as he slid the straps in place and tightened them accordingly.

"Really?"

"Yeah... Someone I used to know suggested it." Arthur murmured, and sensing the shift in energy Vincent's expression fell slightly.

"Sorry, sore subject?" He asked.

"A little I guess... Maybe I can tell you next time we get a drink together?" Arthur inquired back, turning his head over to look at Vincent, who's visage formed into surprise but a gentler smile was quick to return to his lips.

"... Yeah, I'd like that." He replied, watching Arthur climb up on top of his horse.

After turning The Admiral back toward the exit, Arthur offered a final wave to Vincent before kicking the horse's sides to get him going. He had a decent trip ahead of him after all... And as Arthur rode he started to think about how this day didn't go _nearly_ as planned and he still had a few hours of daylight. However, with his body still feeling sorer than it had in months, Arthur knew it was prudent to stop and soak in some hot water for a while.

Arthur didn't even start his trip home until the sun was beginning to crest the horizon, but he had bathed and relaxed some of his overworked joints and muscles at a nearby hotel. Hopefully, he'd be able to come back tomorrow, and even though he still wasn't comfortable staying in the other's house yet, knowing the offer stood was comforting. Why on earth was Vincent so damn nice to him..? Arthur wanted to find reasons to be suspicious but he couldn't, the way Vincent looked at him was so genuine, he never would have guessed that the other had lived through something so traumatic as a fire shattering his family with no reason as to why.

It showed that the other had immense strength, that he was able to put on that smile and greet the day with something other than self-loathing and bitterness. Perhaps Arthur could learn something from him as well...

* * *

The sun had disappeared by the time Arthur finally rolled back into camp and to his surprise, the camp was still mostly empty. It seemed that a majority of everyone else was still out looking for work and when Arthur dismounted his horse, the first thing he saw was Abigail swaying by the fire with Jack in her arms while Javier sat by her and played his guitar with a soft melody. The sight was almost more than Arthur could bare with how adorable it was, he could hear Jack squealing happily and see his little arms waving as Abigail danced, carefully spinning around with him.

For a moment, Arthur just stopped and watched, gently leaning against his horse as he did so who looked over and sniffed at his hat a few times. Quickly reaching into his satchel, Arthur pulled out an apple before holding it up and offering it to the beast. Without hesitation, the horse leaned over and crunched on the apple and bobbed his head.

It was then that Abigail looked over and saw Arthur standing there watching her and she jumped slightly but grinned happily.

"Arthur c'mere!" She called.

"Yes ma'am." Arthur replied with a smile before he began his approach.

"How'd you get on?" she asked curiously as Javier's music paused.

"Well the ranches in Airedale are reliable for work, I got hired at one of 'em, it really is a sight to see." Arthur replied, still trying to process how large the property really was.

"That's good! I never woulda pegged you for a cowboy, Arthur." Abigail snickered, watching a faux hurt look come over Arthur as he rested a hand over his heart.

"You wound me, Miss Robert." He groaned until Abigail snorted and smacked his arm playfully, and as she did so, Jack released a shriek of glee and laughed hysterically, which only caused Abigail to begin laughing, and... Arthur couldn't help himself, soon him, Abigail, Arthur, and even Javier were laughing at Jack's sheer joy of being a baby.

"What the hell was that?" Arthur snickered.

"Language Mister Morgan!" Susan reminded from behind, making Arthur actually jump as he whipped around to see her scalding hot glare landing on him as she stood near her tent, he smiled nervously and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Sorry." He mused before glancing back to Abigail who grinned at him regardless.

"I was just gettin' ready to put him down, I'd offer you to come but I don't think he'll ever go to sleep if you do." She mused before offering Jack to Arthur so he could say his goodnights.

Normally, Arthur wouldn't hesitate in taking Jack, but without warning, before he could even reach out his arms a pang hit Arthur in the gut... And he reminded himself that he needed to keep his hands off of Jack if he didn't want the boy to start recognizing him as his father. However, he did reach out and gently ruffled the boy's hair to his delight.

"Be good for your mama, kid." Arthur chortled, watching Abigail allow Jack to say his goodnights to Javier as well before she turned and walked back toward her tent.

Arthur watched her walk away and took a breath... He was still so damn conflicted, why couldn't he just... Be normal?

"Mister Morgan." That familiar voice of Susan once more suddenly appeared behind him and he was quick to jump again, this one far more dramatic than the last as he spun around.

"Jesus Susan, you tryin' to kill me?" He asked.

"Not yet... Come take a walk with me, Arthur." She then said, and all at once, Arthur felt a pit forming in his stomach.

Normally, Arthur wouldn't be so intimidated of Susan, even though he was extremely scared of her there was no mistake in that, but this felt... Different, normally when he got in trouble with her he knew exactly why and right now he didn't... Which only made him speculate on what this could really be about. Glancing to Javier briefly who pursed his lips shut and gave Arthur a look of pity who in reply rolled his eyes as he began to follow Miss Grimshaw.

She led him around back behind Pearson's caravan which was currently quiet and which only made Arthur worry about what she had to say. When she turned around to face him, her arms were folded and her eyes were critical... She was reading Arthur and he could tell.

"... What're your intentions with that girl, Arthur?" She then asked straight to the point, and immediately Arthur was put on a level of discomfort that he never knew existed.

"What are you-"

"Don't play that crap with me, Arthur, I ain't stupid or blind." She was quick to cut him off and Arthur winced before looking away and resting a hand on his forehead.

"I-I..." Arthur stammered, but thankfully Susan could see Arthur buckling under the weight of his own guilt and her eyes softened.

"Look... I don't care about your business, but that boy needs a father... And if you're not ready to step into that role Arthur, you need to step away." She explained, only confirming Arthur's thoughts on the matter, he sighed and reached up, rubbing his eyes before leaning against the caravan.

"Don't you think I know that?" He asked.

"Obviously not... I see you sneaking in and out of her tent at night." She muttered softly, arching an unimpressed brow at Arthur who cringed and leaned his head back.

"I just..." He muttered before looking over to Susan and despite the fact that Arthur was a private person by nature, he had known Susan for most of his life and she was one of the closest things to a mother beside his own and he remembered despite her tactless mouth that she was a good woman and she cared for all of them which was why she was talking to him to begin with. "... I look at her and that boy and... I see the pieces of John that were left behind." He admitted, watching Susan's expression fall and the air became silent.

"... Arthur, John is gone." Susan said softly as her hand came out to rest on his shoulder. "And if you think holding onto Abigail and that baby is going to bring him back..." She trailed off, knowing she didn't have to state the obvious to Arthur.

"... I know." He muttered.

Thankfully, Susan nodded, it wasn't up to her to tell Arthur what to do in the end anyway, but she couldn't keep watching the impending implosion that was bound to happen if Arthur didn't make up his mind. She reached up and gently caressed his cheek with a small sigh before offering a nod.

"... I'm sorry." She then said, watching Arthur's eyes come up to meet hers as she gently patted his cheek before taking her hand away. "... I know that it hit you hard." She mentioned, watching Arthur roll his eyes and reach into his bag to take a cigarette before pursing it between his lips and offering Susan one to which she obliged.

"It shouldn't have... I should have known that asshole would..." Arthur trailed off but he bit his tongue, knowing he was speaking nonsense, there was no way of knowing what John's plans were.

"Arthur, how long are you gonna beat yourself up over this?" Susan asked as he lit their tobacco.

"Until I can beat him up for it." Arthur grumbled, watching Susan puff out a breath of amusement.

"But until then... Just remember there are consequences Arthur, and you don't want Jack to pay for it." She reminded as gently as she could.

"... You're right." He sighed, despite wishing that she wasn't.

"Of course I am... I'll leave you to your thoughts." Susan mentioned before departing Arthur's side with her cigarette.

Arthur stood there motionless for an undisclosed amount of time as he thought of his conversation with Susan. He felt panic rising up with him because he knew that if Susan was noticing his relationship with Abigail than others were probably noticing as well. While he didn't exactly try to hide his feelings for her, he tried to limit his affectionate gestures with her when they were in the presence of others, just because Arthur didn't want to deal with questions... And Abigail just went along with him... To please him.

Fuck he didn't deserve her...

> Deep into the night with the moonlight as my guide  
> I go wander through the pines and make my way to nature's shrines  
> and I look up to the sky and I know you're still alive,  
> but I wonder where you are I call your name into the dark.  
>   
> I wake up in the morning and I don't know where I've been.  
> All alone on a mountainside, and huddled in the wind.  
> And it feels like I've been away for an era but nothing has changed at all.  
> And it feels like I was with you, but what did we do and where have you gone?  
>   
> On the night you disappeared, I wish I had seen it clear.  
> But a strange light in the sky was shining right into my eyes.  
> There was no one else in sight, just the endless frozen pines.  
> but I wonder all they know 'cause they don't die and they don't grow.  
>   
> I am ready to follow you even though I don't know where.  
> I will wait in the night until you decide to take me there.  
> Cause I know I don't wanna stay here forever, it's time to be moving on.  
> I don't wanna be the only one livin' when all of my friends are gone.  
>   
> I will be waiting for you on the other side of the frozen pines.  
> I'm gonna find a way through there's another life beyond the line.  
> I will be waiting for you on the other side of the frozen pines.  
> I'm gonna find a way through there's another life beyond the line.
> 
> source: [Frozen Pines by Lord Huron](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fG_WCN3PdZk)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys thank you so much for the support and kindness on my last chapter. It's been difficult keeping up with my writing routine due to my sleep schedule being messed up and the drama with family lmao it's giving me a case of writers block but it will pass like it always does. Like always thank you for your patience! I hope you are all liking Vincent, do feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments!  
> -Eros


	4. You Got Yourself A Date

_September 30th, 1895_

_It's been almost two weeks since I started working here at the ranch owned by Vincent and his father... That guy really is strange, and it's not because he acts strange but he knows just what to say or just how to act to make me relax and have a good time. Maybe we've been running too long since I'm so hellbent on trying to find a reason for his kindness, I can tell he's a good person. He's been a godsend since I've been trying to limit myself with Abigail, I only stayed with her once last week and I can tell she's confused... I'm still a coward unable to say what I really think, every time I feel like I'm able to let her go I get sucked right back in._

_But Susan was right... Stringing her along won't bring John back... It only makes me hate him more because I know she's right._

Arthur's pencil stopped dead in it's tracks as that boiling anger started to ignite in his heart. Why was he still thinking of John..? He was never coming back, why was he still fucking hurt over him..?

And why didn't he hate him?

Arthur read the last line he wrote over and over and over again... And eventually, his lead came up and put a strike through the lie.

~~_It only makes me hate him more because I know she's right._ ~~

Sighing, Arthur reached up and rubbed his eyes before he quickly swiped the page, not wanting to look at his newest entry but he wasn't quite ready to get back to work. He glared slightly at the blank page until a face began to form in his head... And his pencil followed suit, and despite the brief fluttering in his heart he continued, he just allowed the lines to appear on the parchment. Despite the initial anxiety at starting the drawing, Arthur began to relax as he started to shade and tilt his head to get the right angle for the portrait. After about fifteen minutes, Arthur felt satisfied with the rough sketch and at the bottom of the page, he wrote the title:

_Vincent Taylor_

Blinking, Arthur took a breath and the smallest of smiles made its way onto his features. It was a good drawing, his best in a while, ever since they had finally stopped here, Arthur had been trying to get back into illustrating, especially over the last week and this one was definitely his best one so far, he was getting the hang of it again.

At the moment, Arthur was in the barn on the Taylor's property in one of the storage areas that was currently empty since is still summer, though Arthur expected the temperature to start dropping in the next few weeks, he knew it wouldn't be nearly as cold as the mountains. They probably didn't even get snow here, and Arthur was thankful for that. He had been given a break after moving a portion of the cattle back toward the property, they probably had another four trips to get the rest of them and Arthur figured it would take them the rest of the night since they, unfortunately, had an unexpected late start.

However, the door swung open, startling Arthur slightly though he relaxed when he saw Vincent walk inside and grin when he looked at him.

"Hey there, I was wondering where you got off to." He chuckled before approaching Arthur who had positioned himself sitting up against the back wall.

"Hope you don't mind, I wanted somewhere quiet." Arthur replied as he shut his journal to prevent the other seeing his drawing of him.

"O'course not." Vincent replied as he dropped down to his rear next to Arthur and leaning his head tiredly against the wall behind them. "We gotta get back to it soon but I figured I come find you to thank you." he mused, his head turning over a bit to peer over at Arthur, who could see the subtle beads of sweat on the other's forehead.

"Thank me?" Arthur asked with some surprise.

"You don't have to be modest, you work your ass off." Vincent chuckled. "My pa has even noticed." He added, giving Arthur some much-needed relief.

"I swear I'm not bein' coy." Arthur snickered. "I just... I dunno I guess I've always worked hard, it's how I was taught." he explained simply, shrugging his shoulders.

"Well, if we had ten of you I'd almost feel comfortable getting rid of the lot of these useless hands that can't lasso a calf to save their lives." He mentioned.

"You tryin' to flatter me, Taylor?" Arthur inquired, glancing over with a small smirk.

"Dunno, is it workin'?" He asked back, as always catching Arthur off guard with his remarks.

"Maybe, but I ain't cheap." Arthur joked.

"I don't doubt that at all." Vincent laughed before pushing himself up with a small groan before turning back to Arthur with a friendly expression before holding out his hand.

Arthur's eyes honed in on the appendage offered to him, and his instincts told Arthur to reject it... Not to rely on anyone else for _anything_ even if was something as simple as being helped up... But before Arthur's sense of self-preservation could kick in, his hand reached out and clasped onto Vincent's before hauling himself up. Vincent's hand was so soft, how? Arthur would never understand but he felt a sense of loss when the other let him go and nodded.

"You ready? We're goin' to the west pasture, you think you can keep up?" Vincent asked playfully.

"With you? No contest." Arthur chortled as they started walking side by side back toward the door.

"Whoa! Was that a jab at me?" Vincent laughed.

"Maybe, guess you'll have to find out once we're done if you're still standing." Arthur retorted.

"That a challenge, Arthur Callahan?" Vincent inquired as Arthur reached forward and opened the door and holding it open for the other.

"Suppose so... Ladies first." Arthur replied with a wicked grin and motioning for Vincent to walk through first.

For the first time, Arthur seemed to push one of Vincent's buttons as a playful glare landed on him and Vincent hesitated to walk through the door. Eventually, he released a small huff and smirked before shaking his head and brushing passed Arthur.

"I'll remember that." He mused simply as Arthur followed close behind, who couldn't help the grin on his face.

* * *

"Arthur come on up!"

Hearing the call in the darkness, Arthur kicked The Admiral's sides and pushed up further up. Herding a group of forty cattle in pitch blackness was a lot easier said than done, but thankfully Vincent had eight hands helping to encircle the herd. He and Arthur were the most reliable so they took up the back while one of the few other experienced hands stayed up front to lead.

They had already been struggling with this group for over half an hour and Arthur could feel his horse getting frustrated and anxious. It had been a long day and both of them just wanted it to be over and done with.

"That's my boy, c'mon." He praised to his horse as he reached down and patted his neck, calming some of his nerves.

"We're almost there Mister Taylor!" One of the hands called.

"Good! Keep pushin' we're almost done!" Vincent replied as the lights from the ranch appeared in the distance.

Within about fifteen minutes, the final heard of the Taylor's stock finally rolled through the corral gates. They would transport them to larger, but fenced-in fields in the morning. Arthur was exhausted and he was ready to lay down for the night, climbing down from his horse, Arthur looked him over and he could tell that his horse was tired, and he'd feel bad forcing him to trek all the way back to camp...

"Callahan." Someone voiced, making Arthur turn around to see Vincent's father standing there.

"What can I do for you, sir?" He inquired, feeling slightly intimidated from the other man's stature.

"Nothin' that you haven't already... My son told me that I should probably thank you and... I suppose I agree. We've hit some hard times, this family, and I haven't been keen on hiring new faces because of it, but you've proved to be useful and trustworthy... So thank you." The bearded man explained, shocking Arthur to his core. "Also, I came to give you this, it's a bonus for your hard work." He added, holding out a small stack of bills to Arthur.

"Oh... Thank you sir-"

"Call me, Abraham... Excuse me, I gotta go terminate the summer help for the year but you're welcome to stick around for the fall if you're inclined."

"Sounds good, thank you again." Arthur replied with a nod, watching Abraham turn to finish his job for the night.

It was nice to feel appreciated, and Arthur had never expected that from the patriarch of Vincent's shattered family but he was grateful all the same and he was surprised to see that the other man had given him an extra twenty dollars. Mac and Davey had poked fun at Arthur on multiple occasions for working on a ranch rather than engage in their delinquency, but Arthur had already contributed ten dollars more than the _both_ of them... Then again Arthur was never a very materialistic man, the money he saved for himself typically was spent on Abigail and Jack unbeknownst to her.

"Told you." Vincent mused as he walked at a leisurely pace toward Arthur, obviously tired as well.

"What?"

"That he noticed." he added.

"... Well, he did mention that _you_ told him to thank me." Arthur replied with a small smile as he saw Vincent's expression become bashful for a moment.

"Of course he did..." He muttered in regret as he sighed.

"... I appreciate it though." Arthur then said, watching Vincent glance back up to him. "... It's not that my family doesn't appreciate me but... It's a lot sometimes ya know? That's all, it's nice to hear it." He said, watching the undeniably shorter man in front of him relax some and nod.

"Yeah... I understand that." Vincent replied before his eyes turned toward the direction his father had went and Arthur could see a hint of sadness there that he couldn't exactly place, but the other was quick to take a breath and slip the riding gloves off his hands and flash an apologetic look to him. "Sorry, I-I probably shouldn't keep you, it's late."

"Do you have the time?" Arthur then inquired curiously as a hand reached up to rest on The Admiral's shoulder as he watched Vincent reach into his satchel and pull out a pocket watch and slightly grimace.

"... It's 1:45." He muttered.

"Holy shit really?" Arthur asked, watching the other chuckle tensely and shrug before slipping the watch into his breast pocket on his shirt now that he was no longer riding. "I'm sorry, if I had known it was that late I woulda let you go sooner." He sighed but Arthur was quick to shake his head.

"Nah, it's not a problem... But I might have to take that room for a night if it's still available." He stated despite every bone in his body telling him it was a bad idea.

"Oh! Yeah, of course... You want me to show you there now?" Vincent inquired.

"Um... Actually, if you don't mind I'm gonna get him set up, he's worked hard today." Arthur replied, motioning to his horse but Vincent was quick to nod.

"Sure, you can put him in the holding pen on the east side of the barn if you want to give him some freedom, that's where we put our personal animals. When you're done, do you want to just meet me at the house?" He asked.

"Sure and... Thank you." Arthur stated sincerely and met Vincent's gaze once more, watching the other man pause briefly before smiling and turning to leave Arthur to his devices.

Focusing his attention back on his horse, Arthur looked up to the massive animal with appreciation before reaching out and scratching underneath his neck and seeing the horse bob his head a bit in delight from the pleasant feeling. Arthur couldn't help but chuckle slightly before taking his reins and beginning to lead him toward the pen that Vincent had mentioned and tried to keep his head concentrated on the task at hand.

He didn't want to keep Vincent up for too long, but Arthur made sure that he took off his horse's equipment and give him a quick brushing before slinging his saddlebag over his shoulder and begin his small trek toward the house. With every step he took his heart seemed to beat just a little faster, he was beginning to get frustrated with his hormones and since he had begun spending less and less time with Abigail his needs were beginning to already make themselves known. Sighing, Arthur knew this would just get more and more annoying... Which probably meant it was a good idea to try and keep himself from spending the night here when possible.

However he continued toward the house without stopping his stride, it was late after all and even _he_ wasn't strong enough to go riding another hour in the dark wilderness of unfamiliar territory. As he walked, he noticed that the ranch was a lot quieter, it seemed that all the people that were there were waiting for the cattle and all at once Arthur was reminded what a good living these people had... Even if their hands were useless sometimes they were loyal. Arthur was almost jealous...

When he finally got to the front porch where the house light illuminated his presence Arthur hesitated, but reached up and knocked on the front door before waiting patiently. It only took a few seconds before Vincent opened the door, smiling brightly at Arthur despite the exhaustion clearly written in his eyes.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Sure am." Arthur chuckled tiredly.

"Here, there's actually a door from outside that you can use that way you don't have to worry about going through the house. C'mon." He said, waving Arthur to follow him before closing the door behind him and walking passed him, following a small path around to the back of the house where there was indeed a door.

Pulling a small key out from one of his pockets, Vincent then unlocked the door before swinging it open gently. Arthur could see that it was a small room, probably enough for four people and it was bare, but Arthur didn't need anything fancy after all. It was perfect for him.

"I know it ain't much but-"

"It's flawless for someone like me, don't worry." Arthur chuckled before walking inside, noting another door on the wall adjacent from the one he had come from.

"That door leads into the house... So if you ever need anything, feel free to ask me." Vincent offered before holding out the key to Arthur. "Here, you can use it when you want to stay."

Arthur's eyes landed on the key but once more, all of his suspicions began to ping him and Arthur hesitated. His eyes actually narrowed a bit at the object before softening and searching up to meet the silver hues of the man before him...

"... Can I ask you a question?" Arthur suddenly asked, watching the other's expression fall into confusion.

"Sure, what is it?"

"... You don't know me... For all you know, I could be a wanted criminal or someone tryin' to hurt you... And you're givin' me access to your house? How do you know I won't try to rip you off or worse?" He asked, watching the other carefully.

Vincent seemed somewhat surprised for a moment but averting his gaze as he thought, within a few moments he just shrugged.

"... I don't." He replied simply before holding out the key to Arthur again.

Blinking, Arthur looked at the other man incredulously, obviously trying to figure out of the other was just that trusting of him or straight-up foolish... But Arthur slowly reached out and took the key from him and once more, his fingers brushed with Vincent's and that familiar feeling of lightning traveling through his body ignited his senses and he was quick to swallow them down.

The silence in the air felt heavy, but eventually, Vincent carefully passed Arthur and reached out to the door that led into the house, but as his hand landed on the knob, he paused before looking back to Arthur and offering one last signature smile of his.

"... Goodnight, Arthur." Vincent said before slipping into the house and quietly closing the door behind him.

For a moment, Arthur stood there listening carefully, wondering if he'd hear the _click_ of a lock after Vincent had shut the door but he never did... And once more Arthur was struck with a feeling of being underserved of these people and their trust and kindness toward him. Yes he worked hard but... He _was_ a wanted criminal basically seeking anonymity... Hell, Vincent didn't even know his real _name_.

Sighing, Arthur closed the door that led outside before he allowed his bags to land on the floor with a small _thud_ before starting to unpack what he thought he'd need for the night. He was thankful that Vincent had warned him a couple of days ago that he would probably be needed here until late tonight, this was one of the bigger jobs on the ranch that occurred when the weather was getting ready to turn, the cattle needed to be closer to the ranch just in case of anything so Arthur was able to tell Dutch that he probably wouldn't be back tonight.

It wasn't like he'd get punished for staying a few nights away from camp but he didn't want to cause any unnecessary worry about him. When he was done he had laid out his bedroll as well as changed his clothing, but he didn't worry about his belt or anything constricting since he was ready to pass out. However as he sat down on the wool bedroll, Arthur held the key that Vincent had given him in his hands... And he fiddled with it carefully.

Why did this bug him so much? It's not like he didn't trust Vincent and his father to a point, they had been nothing but generous to him but if they knew who he was... Arthur was certain they wouldn't be so welcoming anymore considering what they had been through as a family.

Huffing out a small frustrated breath, Arthur slipped the key over into his satchel before hauling himself up and wandering to the light switch, flipping it into the off position. When he was cascaded into the darkness... Arthur laid down on his bedroll and stared up at the black ceiling.

Like usual, once he was alone with his thoughts in the dark... Sleep was quick to evade him and all his past anxieties wanted to haunt him, but now all he could think of was getting to know who Vincent was. He hated feeling like a lost little puppy following someone around, but... Vincent was also good company, Arthur couldn't lie, and say he wasn't.

* * *

Arthur didn't remember falling asleep, but when he woke up, the sun was shining through the small window by the door. Arthur hadn't even noticed there was a window there if he was being honest, but when he woke up Arthur yawned softly and stretched out his body, hearing a few much-needed snaps, crackles, and pops. Despite sleeping on the floor, Arthur couldn't remember the last time he had slept so well.

However it wasn't long before something _else_ caught his attention, glancing down, Arthur groaned softly before leaning his head back down. Sometimes being a man had both its ups... And its downs, despite his dick being obviously _up_ at the moment... And he couldn't walk out of here with a good conscience if he just let it hang out there until it went away.

... He _did_ have some privacy with four walls and a door for once.

Blinking, Arthur glanced over to the door that Vincent had exited through the night before and he assumed that the other wouldn't just barge in. Hell, Vincent knew what having a morning erection was like anyway, if he had any sense _at all_ he would knock.

Though, at the thought of Vincent having a morning erection...

_Fuck._

Reaching down, Arthur was quick to unzip his pants and carefully maneuvering his cock out of his trousers before a hand came up so that he could spit into it, and wasted no time after that.

Once he took a hold of his member, Arthur started with slow even strokes to start, taking a slow breath and leaning his head back once more as his eyes fluttered shut. His mind didn't take long to wander and he wasn't shocked when an image of a certain _son_ came to his mind... His sandy blonde hair... His steely silver eyes...

Releasing a small shudder, Arthur's hand began to increase in speed and pressure, he couldn't deny that Vincent was a beautiful man... However, the next set of eyes made Arthur's hand pause but only for a moment.

_... I want you to **fuck** me, Arthur._

_Arthur, stop teasing me..!_

_A-Arthur... C-Cum inside me..._

_Kiss me._

Huffing, Arthur's eyes fluttered some and his breathing began to quicken as that familiar feeling of release began to tug at his mind, however before he could allow himself off that brink of pleasure, he quickly dug in his pocket with his free hand to pull out a handkerchief to be ready to catch whatever came out. He just needed a little more...

_... Ready for a ride, Arthur Morgan?_

Without warning, Arthur's back arched dramatically, he barely had enough time to cover up the head of his member before his load came spurting out of it. When he finally started to come down, Arthur relaxed once more against his bedroll as he panted and caught his breath... And like clockwork, he hated himself when he was done.

It was so easy to be attracted to Vincent, it was _easy_ to look at him and appreciate his figure and his personality but... He had been _in love_ with John once upon a time, it was hard to just give that up no matter how much the other had hurt him. John was his soulmate...

_Was._

Arthur no longer waited in making sure he was presentable and tucked away before getting up and beginning to pack what little he had brought back up so that he could forget this little encounter in his mind once more until he was at the bottom of a bottle later. When he was finished rolling up his bedroll, he carefully threw it and his saddlebag over his shoulder just as he had the night previous and he was sure that The Admiral had appreciated the night without his saddle and bit.

He wasn't in a rush but knew he should probably ask Vincent if there was anything else he could do before heading out for the day so that he could get back to camp. Though as he rounded the corner of the barn, he noticed that his horse was _not_ in the pen that he had put him in, and all at once, Arthur dropped everything in his hands before jogging out to the pen and looking around somewhat frantically for his horse.

Arthur was almost ready to start shouting for him when he heard a particular unhappy whinny from the barn, and there was no mistaking that it was his horse. Furrowing his brows, Arthur trotted back over to his things and picked them up before cantering over to the barn and swinging the door open. He was relieved to see that it was just Vincent, kneeling beside his rather unhappy horse.

Glancing over, Vincent grinned and waved momentarily.

"Hey there, sorry I hope you don't mind... I noticed he was carrying weight on one of his legs a bit different so I brought him in to check it out." Vincent explained.

"... O'course not." Arthur replied, just shocked that The Admiral was tolerating Vincent, the only man that Arthur's horse had ever let ride him besides his master was John and even then there had been times when The Admiral was aggressive towards him, so to see him standing patiently despite being in obvious discomfort for Vincent simply amazed Arthur. "How did you..?" He muttered before recalling exactly what Vincent had said and walked forward after placing his things aside and kneeling next to him.

The Admiral seemed to calm considerably in Arthur's presence and even leaned down a bit to sniff at Arthur's mop of hair that now extended to his shoulders since he had left his hat back at camp... He desperately needed a haircut, and once he gently sweeping his brunette locks out of his face Arthur could see some swelling in one of the horse's knees and instantly felt a pang of guilt for not noticing.

"Fuck..." He sighed, regret obvious in his tone.

"Don't worry, it's not serious... It must've happened recently, maybe even last night." Vincent replied to calm Arthur's nerves.

"You sure..?" Arthur inquired, glancing over.

"Yeah, I'll wrap it up for him to help give it some support... But you might wanna make sure he goes easy on it." Vincent mentioned.

"Of course... Thank you, I didn't even notice." Arthur sighed as he stood up, this time offering his hand out to Vincent.

He seemed a bit surprised but he took the offer regardless and hoisted himself up before glancing back over to The Admiral with a smile of admiration.

"You don't need to thank me, if anything it's my fault he got hurt anyway. I kept you out a lot longer than I had planned... Speakin' of keepin' you out longer, when are we gonna get that drink?" He asked almost playfully, watching as Arthur arched his brows.

"Dunno, you still wanna do that?" Arthur asked.

"Of course!" Vincent laughed. "Are you kidding? After dealing with his personality, I gotta know how you came to name him The Admiral after all." He chortled.

"Why, he try to take a bite out of ya?" Arthur snickered as he reached up to gently run a hand over the horse's jaw.

"Four times." Vincent replied, making Arthur smirk.

"That doesn't surprise me... Well, since it seems like I might have to stay another night or two to give him a little rest... Maybe tonight?" Arthur offered.

"You got yourself a date, Callahan." Vincent joked before motioning behind him. "I'm gonna go get those wrappings, today's work shouldn't be too hard anyway..." He then added casually before turning away and leaving Arthur to marvel after him.

> Nobody ever knows  
> Nobody ever sees  
> I left my soul  
> Back there now I'm too weak  
> Most nights I pray for you to come home  
> Praying to the Lord  
> Praying for my soul
> 
> Now please don't go  
> Most nights I hardly sleep when I'm alone  
> Now please don't go, oh no  
> I think of you whenever I'm alone  
> So please don't go
> 
> Mmhm...
> 
> Cause I don't ever want to know  
> Don't ever want to see things change  
> Cause when I'm living on my own  
> I wanna take it back and start again  
> Most nights I pray for you to come home  
> Praying to the Lord  
> Praying for my soul
> 
> Now please don't go  
> Most nights I hardly sleep when I'm alone  
> Now please don't go, oh no  
> I think of you whenever I'm alone  
> So please don't go
> 
> (Oh oh oh)  
> I sent so many messages you don't reply!  
> (Oh oh oh)  
> I gotta figure out what am I missing babe!  
> Singing now (Oh oh oh)  
> And I need you now, I need your love!  
> (Oh oh oh)
> 
> Now please don't go (Oh, no)  
> I said well most nights I hardly sleep when I'm alone  
> Now please don't go, oh no  
> I think of you whenever I'm alone  
> So please don't  
> Please don't go
> 
> Please don't go  
> Please don't go (Oh no)  
> Please don't go (Oh no)  
> I think of you whenever I'm alone  
> So please don't go
> 
> source: [Please Don't Go by Joel Adams](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cx7lbPE7Hpk)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks, everyone as usual for the patience, just kinda stuck in a rut right now just figuring out exactly how this story is gonna go. I know where I'm going I just need to get there lmao. I hope everyone likes the direction I'm taking this!  
> -Eros


	5. 'Til Next Time

Arthur kept a close eye on Vincent as he carefully wrapped the bandages around his loyal horse's leg, not because he didn't trust the other he was just... Dammit, Arthur loved his horse and Vincent was even kind enough to allow Arthur some time to treat him to some care and affection once he was done. It had been far too long since he was able to do detailed work on The Admiral. He made sure to brush as much dust off the stallions pelt as he could before going through his mane and tail and making sure to catch any snags or knots as gently as possible, and even though he left the injured leg alone, Arthur also went through The Admiral's three other hooves and used a pick to clean them carefully.

When he stepped back and wiped his forehead, Arthur had to admit that The Admiral looked good and he couldn't help the small smile of pride that etched its way onto his expression. Taking a break, Arthur took the tools he had borrowed and set them aside, if it were up to him he would do a wash on him but with The Admiral relaxing and knowing there was probably still some work to be done, this was good enough for now.

"What a handsome horse you are." Arthur chortled softly as he reached up and ran a hand over the horse's face who delighted in his attention.

Arthur almost chuckled when he thought about how Mac and Davey ignored the warnings about The Admiral because they had seen how tame he was around Arthur... And they learned really quickly why Arthur had gotten him at a discounted price. Davey still had a bite scar on his left hand to show for it and Mac nearly lost an ear.

"Alright, boy... Let's get you into a stall." He mused before leading the beast forward, relieved that Vincent had offered it before leaving them.

Arthur was unsure how his horse would care for being locked up, but The Admiral didn't seem to complain when he saw the fresh hay laid out for him. He walked forward a bit cautiously at first since he had never been in a stall before, but he couldn't resist the food... But as he walked, Arthur noticed it as he focused on the stressed limb... He _had_ been carrying it differently, how had Vincent noticed and not him?

Releasing a small sigh, Arthur just closed the door behind his horse gently to avoid startling him before walking to his saddle and hauling it up into his arms. On closer inspection, Arthur hummed knowing he would need to clean his it too but that was a job for another day, he then hung it over the stall door to dry, but as he was walking out of the barn-

"Arthur watch out!" Vincent shouted, and as Arthur glanced up he _barely_ had enough time to throw himself out of the way of an angry steer that was charging toward him.

After picking his face up from the dirt, Arthur quickly rolled onto his back and was relieved to see that the rampaging animal didn't turn to finish him off right away. Vincent was quick to run to his side, a lasso in one of his hands.

"Shit, you okay? Thought you might'a been a goner there." He snorted in good humor as he offered a hand out to Arthur to which the other took without hesitation.

"Think so. The hell happened?" Arthur asked as he saw the bull slowing to a stop but turning back toward them and huffing aggressively as he brushed himself off when he was standing again.

"Ah, some of the girls are back in business and he's not too happy on being kept away from 'em." Vincent sighed.

"I then I get why he's so pissed." Arthur chuckled, however as the bull began dragging his front hoof into the dirt, Arthur could see the hulk of a beast beginning to target them.

"Yeah well, I'm a good wrangler but he weighs easily ten times more than me..." Vincent muttered, worry lacing his tone. "I can't believe they let him get out..."

Arthur frowned but as he looked to the bull, an idea came into his head and he glanced to his left to see another lasso casually hanging on one of the fence posts by the corral.

"... I think I got a plan." Arthur mused.

"Do you?" Vincent inquired, the timbre in his voice hinting at both amusement and intrigue.

"... Maybe." Arthur then clarified before carefully beginning to sidestep toward the fence, gulping as he saw the bull's head with his massive horns following his movements.

"You gonna enlighten me..?"

"... I'm gonna run like hell, while he's focused on me, you rope him and once you got a hold of him, I'll rope him and hopefully, with two of us we can calm him down or at least lead him into another pen." He explained.

"That... That's your plan?" Vincent then asked, eyeballing Arthur like he was nuts.

"Yep." Arthur replied simply.

Vincent sighed but as the bull began getting impatient, Arthur managed to unhook the lasso off the fence post and ready it in his hands... Seeing Arthur's hands slowly move along the rope with experience, as if he had done it a hundred times before Vincent bit his lip and looked forward.

"Alright then... Just try not to get killed yeah? You still owe me a drink later." He mused, watching as Arthur looked over to him with a smug smirk, an expression which Vincent wasn't used to, it actually threw him off a bit with how handsome he was.

"... Don't you worry, I wouldn't miss that for the world." Arthur replied before beginning to walk forward, the confidence in his strut almost making Vincent grin.

It didn't take much longer before the ranch hands that worked year-round began to gather, a few panting.

"M-Mister Taylor I'm sorry! H-He was just too strong and-"

"It's fine just get back and be ready if either of us needs rescuing." Vincent quickly retorted and waved them to back up so that the bull didn't feel cornered and charge before Arthur was prepared.

Arthur felt as if he was walking through the valley of the shadow of death as the bull looked him dead in the eye... The raw power exuding from such an animal, Arthur admired it, but as he moved a good distance away from Vincent and the others, he looked over and nodded before he limbered himself up briefly.

"Let's go big feller! C'mon!" Arthur taunted, watching his massive body turn fully toward him. "C'mon! Show me what'chu got!"

Without anymore needed calls, the bull began to charge forward toward Arthur, who was quick to begin sprinting away from it. He could hear the thundering of the hooves behind him, and he could even _feel_ the ground behind him as the bull got closer and closer. Panting, Arthur nearly felt the need to dive under a fence before the sound suddenly stopped and there was a sharp moo of distress as the bull has been unexpectedly caught with a lasso.

Making sure he had gotten some distance before he turned, Arthur was thankful to see that Vincent had come through and roped the bull, though he was obviously beginning to struggle. Arthur didn't waste any time in readying his arm and as the bull bellowed and thrashed his head, Arthur threw the rope and just managed to get it over his massive rack.

There was a quick cheer from the remaining ranch hands but now there was the task of calming the bull down.

"Whoa! Whoa!" Arthur called as he held the rope firmly in place but he could already feel it beginning to slip through his grasp and Arthur quickly cringed as he felt the burning of the rope slicing into his hands. "Calm down boy! Come on now!" He beckoned to no avail.

"Arthur! Give the rope some slack!" Vincent called, and despite that seeming like a horrible idea, Arthur did as he was instructed and allowed the rope to give a little and giving his hands some much-needed relief, but as he saw Vincent beginning to approach his hands tightened again.

"You sure that's a good idea!?"

"I've raised him since he was a calf... Trust me." Vincent replied calmly.

Arthur frowned but allowed his grip on the rope to loosen once again as he watched the bull huff and fidget in place. This looked like a disaster waiting to happen, but it seemed that the closer that Vincent got, the calmer the bull became, and even though Arthur still would have preferred a different approach to this, he couldn't deny that Vincent seemed to know what he was doing.

"That's right... You ain't as mean as you've been actin' lately... I know that." Vincent cooed softly as he continued forward, his voice smooth and soothing.

Arthur couldn't seem to believe his eyes despite that it was literally happening right there in front of him, but as Vincent stopped in front of the bull, the animal almost seemed to want his affection, leaning in and sniffing at his shirt. Smiling, Vincent reached out and rubbed the spot between the hulk's eyes and scratched beneath his chin before looking over to Arthur.

"I think I can take it from here... Thank you, Arthur. You wanna come with me?" He inquired.

Sighing in relief, Arthur nodded before walking forward and carefully taking his lasso off the animal's massive head. Vincent sent a grin toward Arthur before beginning to lead the bull back to his holding pen.

"I knew that if I could get his attention long enough and make him feel powerless he'd listen but I wasn't expecting you to put your ass on the line like that... Very impressive, Callahan." He then commented with a small smirk over at Arthur.

"Firstly, if you think that _we_ made this animal feel powerless perhaps you ain't as smart as I thought you was... And I should know cause I _ain't_ smart, which is why I put my ass on the line, it's what I do best." Arthur chortled.

"Didn't we though? Cause if he _didn't_ feel powerless he coulda threw you back at me once you roped him." Vincent laughed.

"I guess you have a point."

The two cowboys walked at a leisurely pace with the bull in tow, talking and laughing as they always seemed to do in the presence of each other. What Arthur noticed was there was never a beat missed with Vincent, there was never a point in time where he _wanted_ to get away from the other like how Arthur felt around his family back at camp... He and Vincent almost felt kindred at times despite being so different.

Vincent was a small man compared to Arthur, his skin wasn't marred with years of abuses and fights for his life, his eyes still held that light of happiness despite what he and his father had gone through... Not to mention how clean and presentable he always was when he had interactions with Arthur, it was a surprise that he hadn't seen a woman come around yet and introduce herself as his wife.

Maybe he wasn't married..? He _was_ still pretty young after all, and given what a beautiful man Vincent was, Arthur knew he'd have no problem in finding a partner when he was ready... Which made Arthur wonder...

Quickly blinking and forcing wherever his thoughts were going out the window, he pulled the gate open to the open and Vincent carefully led the bull inside before slipping out of the enclosure. As the adrenaline of the situation had finally worn off, Arthur quickly hissed as the pain from the rope burn began to radiate in his hands, though his dominant one got it far worse.

"You okay?" Vincent asked as he heard Arthur's noise of pain.

"Yeah, I didn't have any gloves on when that ruckus with him started and I didn't really have the time to get my bearings." Arthur replied as he looked down at the straight line etched into his hand.

It could have been a lot worse, thankfully the bull just thrashed his head once or twice otherwise his hands would have been a bloody mess but that didn't mean it didn't hurt like a bitch. The air stung the exposed skin and any movement his fingers made was excruciating, but he wasn't prepared for Vincent's hand to come out and take his. His heart skipped a beat despite the other simply examining the wound with a small frown.

"I'm sorry." He sighed. "Here, come with me we should get some medicine on it. My mother made some really powerful stuff that should help with the pain."

"I-I don't wanna be a bother, really it's not a big deal I did it to myself..." Arthur mumbled almost bashfully.

"Nonsense, if my steer hadn't gone crazy you woulda kept mindin' your own business. Let's go." Vincent ordered in a surprisingly authoritative fashion... And for someone of his stature Arthur had to stop himself from smiling.

"Yes, sir." He acquiesced and followed the other man back toward the farmhouse.

It had seemed like Abraham was gone most of the day and for a ranch of this size that didn't surprise Arthur much. It made walking into the house easier despite still feeling out of place as he did everywhere he went. Once more, Vincent led Arthur into the kitchen and walked up to a cupboard. It took a minute or so of searching but he eventually pulled out a small jar.

"There ain't much left but it's good stuff, you only need to use it once." He explained as he held out a hand for Arthur, but he was quick to feel guilty.

"You sure you wanna use somethin' that your mother made on me? I'm sure it'll be just fine without it." Arthur muttered but Vincent shook his head.

"She made it to help people, don't be silly." He mused.

Arthur still hesitated but seeing the expectant expression on Vincent's visage, Arthur eventually let out a sigh and gave his hand over. As he felt Vincent's hand delicately take his own, Arthur averted his gaze but seeing the other's fingers carefully dip into the jar he noted a green color and a gel-like consistency on his index and middle finger. He couldn't help but flinch when the other applied the medicine to his wound but it was followed with relief just seconds later.

"That's strong stuff what's in there?" Arthur asked, tilting his head as he looked down at his palm.

"Honestly I don't know, my ma was good with plants and made all kinds of stuff but most of her recipes that she wrote down were burnt in the fire." Vincent sighed regretfully.

"Right. I'm sorry." Arthur mentioned, but once more he watched as Vincent seemed to shrug it off

"It is what it is, how does your hand feel? I'll put a bandage on it." He offered as he opened a drawer and pulled out a white wrapping.

"Good, I wonder what she could have put in there, it feels a lot better." Arthur murmured.

"She was a wonder with plants of all kinds. I know some stuff too but not near as much as her... I always took more after her than my pa." Vincent admitted as he carefully wrapped the bandage around Arthur's hand, his movements slow and calculated.

"I don't remember much about my mine... My father was a real bastard and that's all I ever really knew about him." Arthur hummed, seeing Vincent frown.

"I-I'm sorry, I often forget others have had it harder than me." He sighed shamefully but Arthur was quick to shake his head.

"It's hard to tell who has it rougher a lot of the time, I don't think I'd wanna live through what happened to you either. Don't worry about it." He assured, seeing the corners of Vincent's lips perk up.

"I guess you're right... You know that steer out there? He was the first calf that my mother showed me how to birth." Vincent then mused with a small smile before he turned his back to Arthur and reached back into the cabinet.

"Now _that_ is a job I don't envy." Arthur snorted as he slightly peered around Vincent to see that he had taken out a few glasses as well as a bottle.

Then turning back to Arthur, Vincent held a bottle of what seemed to be expensive whiskey.

"Suppose now is as good a time as any for that drink, huh?" Vincent then inquired, seeing Arthur relax some and smile as well before nodding and taking the glasses from Vincent so he could set them on the table.

"I thought I was supposed to be treatin' you." Arthur then mused as he remembered Vincent's comments about their _date_.

"Oh did you? Well... Why don't you just get me next time?" He asked, seeming to smirk at Arthur as they approached their chairs, taking a seat in front of one another.

"Next time?" Arthur seemed to inquire innocently, watching Vincent chuckle before pouring them their respective drinks and slowly sliding Arthur's toward him.

"I know I shouldn't assume but... Yeah, next time." Vincent replied smoothly, then sending a smile that Arthur would have actually described as sweet... Perhaps even cute.

"Well then... To new friendships." Arthur then stated, feeling his anxieties and doubts about Vincent beginning to melt away as he held up his glass in an offer to Vincent who seemed pleasantly surprised.

"To new friendships." He parroted with a grin before gently clinking their glasses together.

Tipping the glass back slowly, Arthur took a small sample sip just to get a taste of the alcohol. The spices were evident and Arthur felt he could almost even taste the wood with how infused it was, and it was just the right amount of smokey. It was easily some of the best whiskey he had ever had, and despite Arthur preferring bourbon, this drink tasted perfect for this moment.

"Damn this is good." Arthur said before taking a healthier swig it and getting a feeling of the burn which warmed his stomach but didn't boil it.

"Right? It's my father's but don't worry I have every intention of replacing it." Vincent chuckled.

"I hope so, I could never tell I was in his good graces until last night."

"Ah, he's always been that way don't worry it's not you."

There was a pause as the two of them took another drink, but it wasn't a tense silence, more of an anxiously optimistic silence? It felt light not forced and all at once Arthur wondered why it had taken him so long to start to really trust Vincent.

"So, Arthur," Vincent then mused, his eyes striking Arthur in a different manner... They were reading him, and the smirk on his face proved nothing but charming. "The Admiral." he stated simply.

Arthur tensed for a moment but released a small puff of air in slight amusement. He did tell Vincent that he would tell him after all, and since the other had helped him identify his beloved horse's injury, it felt like Arthur had owed him... But feeling a slight shift in Arthur's aura, Vincent's expression fell only slightly.

"... Someone I used to know, named him for me." Arthur recounted, his voice softer than he had been before. "He and I were... Close, when I got that horse he was just as ornery as he was with you, nearly killed a couple of stable hands tryin' to hold him down... So I brought him back and the owner was kind enough to sell him to me for a much-discounted price and... Well, my mentor has a horse with similar quirks, and his name is The Count... So that person said that it was only natural that I have The Admiral and the name just stuck." He explained, despite the slightly somber tone to his words there was still a small smile on his lips.

He remembered that day fondly once... It was the day that John had told Arthur that he was in love with him...

All at once that pain with John's disappearance hit Arthur once more and the smile fell from his expression quickly and Arthur didn't hesitate in taking down the rest of the whiskey in his glass, no longer worrying about savoring it.

"... Seems like a heavy subject for you." Vincent mentioned, tilting his head some at Arthur, who took a breath and nodded a bit.

"It is..." He said simply, not wanting to delve into it further.

"I hope I didn't make you relive anything too painful." The other then sighed as he refilled Arthur's glass.

"It's alright... Feels like ancient history now." Arthur admitted as he looked up to meet Vincent's eyes, whose reflected empathy, and remorse.

"I know how that feels." He recalled before finishing his first drink as well before filling his own glass up, but a smile was soon to return to his face. "However, I am a professional drinker, and I know that mixing whiskey with sadness is not a good idea." He snorted, watching the corners of Arthur's lips quirk up. "So... Tell me a little more about yourself, Arthur."

"Like what?" Arthur chuckled softly.

"Like... I dunno something most people don't know about you." Vincent suggested, making Arthur think, there really wasn't a lot about him in general, though a thought eventually came to his mind despite the initial hesitation.

"... I draw." He stated simply with a shrug, but seeing Vincent's eyes light up he felt heat beginning to radiate at his face and he regretted saying anything.

"Really!?" Vincent asked with excitement laced through his voice, making Arthur clear his throat and try to forget his embarrassment.

"Y-Yeah... I have this journal and I just kinda write and draw a little here and there, ain't nothin' major." He muttered.

"The one you were writin' in the barn yesterday?" Vincent inquired curiously with a small grin.

"The answer is no, you can't look in it." Arthur snickered watching Vincent deflate and groan slightly.

"Oh come on! You can't tease me like that! Besides, how do I know you ain't lyin' to seem all mysterious?" Vincent chuckled, wiggling his brows at Arthur once more who rolled his eyes.

"Sorry, I'm too old to be fooled by that." Arthur snorted with a small grin before wiggling his brows back at Vincent.

"Hm... Maybe I'll just have to get you drunk and take it for myself." He mentioned, watching Arthur send a challenging gaze to him.

"Good luck, kid." He jested.

"Oh kid, huh?" Vincent laughed before rolling his eyes playfully.

"Uh-huh... Got no respect." Arthur mused in good humor as he took another drink, feeling rather casual with Vincent at the moment... Perhaps too much. "Perhaps I'll have to give you a lesson on it."

However, when Arthur glanced up, his heart skipped a beat when he saw a small smirk on Vincent's expression... One that could almost be described as flirtatious.

"Someone like you teaching me... I'm sure I'd take it rather well." He replied smoothly.

**_BA-BUMP_ **

_Whoa._

What was happening here? Arthur blinked and watched as Vincent brought his drink up to his lips and took a decent swig... And Arthur's eyes soon traveled down to the other's throat and watching it move accordingly as he swallowed. He hadn't meant to be overly friendly, but even if he hadn't, Vincent was responding so well... The confusion began to eat at Arthur and without thinking, he spoke.

"Maybe... But now it's my turn." He said simply enough, watching Vincent tilt his head over at him. "... You got a wife?" He inquired curiously enough, and for the first time since Arthur had met him, Vincent actually seemed to become a bit uncomfortable, shifting briefly and taking another drink.

"Not exactly... I mean it's not for a lack of suitors it's just... After the fire and everything, my priority is here now. It wouldn't be fair to take a wife when I can't give her what she needs." He explained, and while his words made sense, Arthur watched him carefully... And he could tell that Vincent was lying.

Why he was lying interested Arthur, but he knew that calling him on it would be useless, though it was information he would store away for later and he nodded.

"You?" Vincent then inquired, seeing Arthur shake his head.

"Nah... You kiddin'? I'm much more trouble than I'm worth." Arthur snickered, currently leaving Jack and Abigail out of the conversation on the basis of it simply wasn't Vincent's business, Abigail wasn't his wife anyway.

"I can see that." Vincent then chortled, and once more the lightness in the air returned.

Despite that Arthur was expecting to go to a bar with Vincent, this was nice. They didn't have to worry about obnoxious drunks barging in on their conversations or any other undesirables... And they were able to focus on one another.

"I was almost married once." Arthur confessed, seeing the light of curiosity shine through Vincent's eyes and he leaned a little closer to pay attention.

"Really? Did something happen or..?"

"Well..." Arthur trailed off, trying to figure out the best way to describe running with a band of dangerous outlaws. "... I've never stayed in one place for very long, the people I run with are the same and... She just couldn't give her life up for mine and I couldn't either." He mentioned with just the smallest level of regret but he remembered Mary fondly anyway since she was such an important part of his life.

"... Take this as you may, but... I hope you're around for at least a little while." Vincent admitted, surprising Arthur when he saw the smallest hue of pink beginning to bleed over Vincent's expression, and for a moment Arthur wondered if he was seeing things.

"... This place is nice... Why would I wanna leave already?" Arthur then inquired as watched Vincent's eyes surf back up to his before another smile slithered across his lips.

"I-I'm glad." Vincent stumbled slightly before taking another drink and filling his glass back up.

Arthur was used to being socially awkward one, so to see Vincent becoming visibly nervous and maybe even bashful... It was adorable, and Arthur was beginning to wonder what other kinds of expressions he could make cross the other man's face. He was undeniably charming without even trying, and as Arthur looked over the blush on Vincent's face, he could see the very light, almost invisible freckles that crossed the bridge of Vincent's nose.

How was Vincent able to make Arthur drop his defenses so easily..? Even though his hand hesitated, Arthur slowly began to move off the table and into his satchel before pulling out the leather-bound book before he finished his second drink to even out his nerves about showing off something so private. There was only one man who had ever seen the inside of Arthur's journal... And that man vanished.

Seeing the familiar book, a bit of confusion shone on Vincent's features but as Arthur carefully opened it and surfed quickly through multiple written entries as well as doodles, it took a minute or so before he found one he was comfortable with allowing Vincent to see before sliding the open book over.

Placing his drink aside carefully, Vincent took the book carefully in his hands as if he were handling something delicate. He was being gentle with Arthur's personal journal, and for some reason unknown to Arthur, even _that_ was heartwarming in his own right, but he was quick to reach over and grab the bottle so that he could refill his glass once more.

The drawing was of The Admiral, standing proudly like the beast he was, and surprise illuminated Vincent's visage as he looked over all the details. Arthur truly had talent and when he looked up to Arthur again he grinned.

"I suppose you weren't lyin'." He mused.

"Nope... Here." Arthur offered, and he knew that if he hadn't already had the quality whiskey in his system he never would have done what he was about to, but he took the book from Vincent and flipped through the pages again before seeing the familiar doodle of Vincent that he had done. His heart shuddered in his chest slightly as familiar memories began to flood in his mind as he thought of John sitting in his lap by the fire admiring his drawings...

_Arthur, John is gone..._

Blinking, Arthur had to remind himself... John had been gone for a long time already... He had to move on.

So without further hesitation, he began to slide the book back over and watching Vincent take the book as he prayed to God that he hadn't just made a terrible mistake as he took a few more healthy gulps of the whiskey and completely finishing off his _third_ drink just about as quick as he had poured it.

However, his eyes kept Vincent in his focus as he gauged the situation carefully... And he was actually shocked to see that pink hue on Vincent's face turn full-blown crimson. He took a breath and gulped, it seemed the Vincent was actually speechless.

"I know it's nothin' special-"

"Are you kiddin'?" Vincent inquired, looking up to Arthur. "C-Can I... Do you think I could have it?" He then asked, this time making Arthur blush with the unexpected question.

"U-Uh... Sure, I-I mean... Of course, but you don't have to be nice." Arthur stumbled over his words as the other handed the journal back over.

"I'm not! I really like it. You really have a gift, Arthur." Vincent replied as Arthur carefully tore the page out of his book and glancing to the back of the page to make sure that there wasn't any writing on it before handing it over.

"Oh please, shut up." Arthur snorted. "Flattery will get you nowhere." He added.

"It ain't flattery... Not if it's true." Vincent corrected before actually winking at Arthur and sending his heart straight into his stomach as the nerves from before began to gnaw at his psyche.

As he looked over, Arthur noticed that there was no longer any light outside. He didn't think they had been here long, but it was already into the evening when they walked inside the house... And despite part of Arthur wanting to stick around, he knew that it was time to leave, he was pleasantly buzzed and he didn't want Abraham to walk in on him and his son drinking his expensive whiskey.

"I don't mean to change the subject, but you got the time?" Arthur inquired.

"You need a watch, Arthur." Vincent commented with good humor before reaching into his pocket and pulling out the contraption and looking down at it. "Looks like it's almost eight, we should probably wrap this up before my pa get's home." He sighed, seemingly reading Arthur's mind before finishing his drink himself.

Arthur was feeling both warm from the alcohol and had a slight floating sensation in his head, but he wondered how Vincent was fairing, he didn't seem to lose any of his wits yet, perhaps Arthur had underestimated him? It was obvious by now that Vincent didn't smoke, perhaps he relied more on alcohol? Though he was very obviously not a drunk either.

Rising from the table a little too fast though, Vincent quickly reached down to steady himself on the table and reaching up to rub his eyes briefly for a moment.

"You good?" Arthur chuckled.

"I'm fine... This stuff is just a little more powerful than I'm used to." Vincent replied evenly and standing back up straight once he was balanced and nodding to Arthur. "See?"

"Whatever you say."

Arthur took their glasses while Vincent grabbed the bottle and put it back where it came from before taking the glasses from Arthur and placing them in the sink before they turned to one another and the air seemed to stop around them again... The house was quiet and the night was calm...

"... I had a good time with you tonight." Vincent admitted, his voice a bit softer.

"... Me too." Arthur replied, almost as if confirming the thoughts that both of them had been having.

However, before Arthur could even process what was happening here, thoughts of Abigail and Jack began to flow through his mind and the guilt that he had managed to chase off for months suddenly came back to bite him. What the fuck was he doing..? Blinking, Arthur quickly took a step back and took a breath before he cleared his throat.

"I uh... I should probably go check on my horse one more time before I head to my room for the night... It probably wouldn't be a good idea for me to be here when your father gets home." He explained, despite seeing Vincent almost seem to deflate subtly.

"Y-You're probably right..." Vincent muttered, averting his gaze as Arthur began to walk away, though seeing Arthur pause briefly by the table to grab his journal and slipping it back into his satchel, he couldn't help himself. "W-Wait!" He blurted, watching Arthur's steps pause before looking back, and though Vincent seemed to be a little embarrassed about his small outburst the recovered quickly. "Uh... We can do this again, right?" He asked.

Deep down... Arthur knew that it wasn't a good idea... Vincent wasn't someone he could mess with for multiple reasons, you never mix work and intimacy, and ever since John had left, Arthur felt guilty for indulging in his most primal desires for men because Abigail didn't deserve someone who would lower himself to such a shameful practice... But fuck it felt too right for Arthur to say no.

"... O'course." He replied, seeing relief cross Vincent's features. "... Til next time."

Without any more words shared, Arthur sauntered out of the house as the night's events replayed in his head over and over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know things are starting to heat up just a little here and there! I'm so excited to see where this goes and I hope everyone is just as on edge as me! I'm having so much fun exploring Vincent's personality! Thank you all as always for the support and kindness!  
> -Eros


	6. The Burning

_October 17th, 1895_

_Been about a month since we've set up here, I'm still workin' for the Taylors... And I just can't stop thinking about that guy, Vincent. I'm used to feelin' urges, but this just feels different... It's like a pull from my heart that I can't resist and I don't know how I feel about that, it scares me beyond belief. Even in my free time when I'm back home, I find myself wondering what he's doing or what he's wearing._

_I even find myself thinking about him when I'm with Abigail... And even though I hate myself and I want to stop, I just can't, it's starting to become second nature to me. Part of me thinks that maybe it would be a good idea to quit working there, but he pays me well for easy work, it would be hard to find a job that pays as good as he does._

_But is the money worth my sanity?_

Arthur blinked as he stared down at the page in his journal when the small moan beside him had his head turning and his heart couldn't help but be warmed as he saw Abigail shift just slightly in her sleep. He was still naked sitting next to her for Christ's sake... Taking a breath, Arthur gently shut his journal and setting it on the floor next to their cot before glancing over to the bassinet where Jack still slept peacefully.

After about two months, Jack had begun to sleep further through the night and now it was rare that he woke up in distress. In truth, Arthur didn't know what time it was, he knew it was early because he could barely see the page he was writing on in the dim light, but he then looked back over to Abigail as her perfect body lay beside his beneath the pelts from his tent.

It had been a while since he and she had such a... Personal liaison since he had started working away from camp and if he was being honest, he wasn't expecting to sleep with her the night previous, but like a lot of instances with Abigail, he could never say no. Reaching over, he gently brushed some hair out of her face affectionately and feeling his heart bleed for what he was feeling... Once more he felt like he was being pulled in two different directions.

He wasn't expecting Abigail to wake up, but when he saw her eyes flutter open and look up to him, he arched his brows slightly.

"Hey..." She yawned quietly.

"Mornin'." Arthur whispered. "Sorry, didn't mean to wake you."

"It's okay... Why're you up so early?" Abigail asked as she stretched lightly and pushed herself up so that she was sitting up next to him, allowing the pelts to fall from her body and expose her breasts, Arthur's eyes couldn't help but do a once over.

"Couldn't get back to sleep..." He replied before reaching up to run a hand through his hair, and technically he wasn't lying.

"... Maybe I can help with that." Abigail mused softly before suddenly swinging one of her legs over him pleasantly surprising Arthur to the highest degree.

"You sure? You don't have to." He stated, though his hands were quick to rest at her hips.

"Why not? We did it last night." She snickered softly before leaning in and kissing Arthur's lips.

He couldn't argue there... Though they had been _extremely_ careful whenever they had slept together since she had given birth to Jack, Arthur made sure never to finish inside her no matter how tempting it was, and Abigail was a known temptress.

When she pulled away from him, Abigail leaned down toward Arthur's neck and placed small nips and kisses on his skin. It made his hair stand on end and one of Arthur's hands was quick to start roaming up Abigail's slender body until it was able to grasp at one of her flawless breasts _carefully_ since she was still breastfeeding. Abigail shivered slightly against him and began to rub her wetness against his shaft and encouraging its growth.

The hand that was on Abigail's ass tightened slightly with the anticipation of being inside her again. Arthur released a breath as she teased the head of his cock with her warmth, he was certain there was no way he'd be getting any stiffer. Just when the teasing was becoming unbearable, Abigail pulled away once more, her face red against the faint morning light and her chest was rising and falling quickly. Without any other words or hesitation, Abigail reached down and carefully aimed Arthur's shaft toward her entrance before beginning to sink down.

Feeling her walls give away as they had time and time before, Arthur couldn't help the slight grunt that escaped his lips as he felt his member surrounded by the familiar feeling of Abigail's flower clutching onto him for dear life. Abigal released a small muffled mewl and wrapped her arms around Arthur's neck, though like clockwork, both of them briefly glanced over to Jack and once it was confirmed he was still sleeping, they looked back to one another.

Abigail was easily the most beautiful woman Arthur had ever been with, he would even rank her above Mary in ways especially beyond her body. Her soul was the best part of her, and the fact that Abigail would have happily given it to him if he had asked for it... Arthur wanted so much to fucking love her, and as her azure eyes met his own, Arthur wanted nothing more than for her to feel how much he wanted the fantasy of having a family with her.

Leaning in, Arthur pressed his lips back to Abigail's and pulled her close. Her eyes fluttered shut and one of her hands delved into Arthur's hair before she rose and fell back down, and once more again until she had started a rhythm with her hips. Arthur's tongue prodded passed her lips and encouraged hers to dance with his, to which she delighted happily and what started as a slow and easy pace began to evolve into something much more passionate.

They had become good at having sex and keeping it quiet, but this time proved especially difficult... It wasn't long before Arthur could already begin to feel the telltale signs of release, and he wanted to make sure that Abigail was on the same page as him.

Without warning, Arthur took hold of Abigail's hips firmly before flipping them over and rolling Abigail onto her back. She gasped in surprise but went with it regardless and splayed her legs willingly for him once he was on top and he was careful not to slip out of her. For just a moment, Arthur adjusted himself and sat up so he could view Abigail's body beneath him, and more importantly toy with her as she had done earlier.

One of his hands then came up and he allowed some saliva to fall onto his thumb before it found itself at Abigail's bud and taking care to form circles against it as his hips continued working their way into her. Her face contorted with pleasure and she was unable to keep her body from moving beneath him as she was overwhelmed with the stimulation at her clit while Arthur's other hand rested upon one of her breasts again, rolling her nipple between his fingers. Ever since she had Jack she had developed more sensitivity at certain parts of her body... And Arthur always made sure to exploit that.

He could hear her whimpering needily and obviously fighting to keep her volume at the minimum but it was proving difficult, and it didn't take long for one of her hands to come up and cover her mouth. Arthur smirked slightly and thrust deeply into her and hearing her cry out against her palm and arch her back. She was close, he just had to hold out a bit longer... But he found that even when he thought he was about to cum, he came down at the last second. It wasn't often he had this problem, but it made getting Abigail off easier.

Her breaths began to speed up and the pitch of her whines were becoming higher until she began to spasm against him, her back arching dramatically and her walls just begging Arthur to release... He just needed a little more...

_Someone like you teaching me... I'm sure I'd take it rather well._

Quickly pulling out, Arthur gasped softly as his hand came to stroke his shaft at a quick pace until his load started to spurt over Abigail's body. Most of it landed upon her navel and stomach but there were a couple of stray beads that actually landed up near her breasts.

Relaxing, Arthur hunched over Abigail slightly and panted in unison with her and feeling the sweat at his brow. Eventually opening his eyes and looking down at her, she smiled up at him before one of her fingers traced down to carve a trail through Arthur's cum on her breasts before sticking it in her mouth. The action alone caused Arthur's cock to twitch involuntarily and he chuckled breathlessly.

"Don't do that." He grunted softly before sitting back up and removing himself from between her legs so that he could fetch her something to wipe herself off with, thankfully there was a stray hand towel hanging up near the flap of the tent and Arthur snatched it before handing it over to Abigail.

"Thanks." She mused before taking care to make sure she wiped up the entire mess until she was able to sit back up and begin to fix her hair now that the light was more prominent in the sky.

"No, thank you." Arthur chortled as began to redress, thankful that he had brought a spare change of clothes with him in here last night.

Once he was presentable, Arthur turned to see that Abigail was getting dressed as well. She had already tied her hair up and was finishing up tying the bow in the back of her dress, though she was struggling.

"Here." Arthur offered before stepping up to her and tying the knot for her to her relief.

"Thank you, Arthur." She sighed before turning back to him with a sweet smile on her face.

"No problem." Arthur replied before reaching up to caress her cheek gently when a thought hit him. "... I know I don't say it enough, but really... I should be the one thankin' you." He admitted before taking his hand away and watching pleasant surprise consume Abigail's face.

"Oh... Well, you're welcome." She replied, blushing at him adorably as she always did.

That sweet expression on her face... Arthur didn't deserve that, how long was he going to continue stringing her along? Supporting her and Jack and having sex with her were completely different and he knew that if he really wanted to be fair to both of them, he needed to end their romantic relationship... However before he could even ready himself to do such a thing, Arthur heard a whinny of one of the horses outside, and while they had been kept relatively secret out here, it didn't stop Arthur from quickly making his way out of the tent just to make sure it was someone they know and it wasn't shocked to see Dutch rolling up.

He hadn't seen the other in about a week since Arthur was spending up to two or three times a week at the Taylor's Ranch, so he couldn't help feeling happy to see the familiar man riding into camp.

"Do my eyes deceive me? Is that Arthur?" He snorted as he climbed off The Count.

"It is." Arthur replied as he made his way toward the mustached man and embracing each other briefly since it wasn't often they were separated for that long and Arthur had to admit, even after their little... Whatever it was, he would have almost said it brought them closer.

"I'm glad you're here, I've been wanting to talk to you about that little ranch town." Dutch mentioned.

"I wouldn't say it's little, there's only one bank in town but the ranches there are a sight." Arthur recounted as he remembered being in awe of how large Vincent's property was.

"Really? That could prove real useful in the future, you got any leads on the bank?" Dutch asked and watching Arthur flash a nervous smile at him.

"Not really... The people who got me workin' for them don't leave a lot of personal time." He replied. "Besides I thought we wasn't supposed to be getting into trouble?"

"Jesus Christ, Arthur, you're starting to sound like a regular goddamn taxpayer." Mac scoffed as he and Davey sat by the fire.

Arthur didn't have anything personal against either Mac or his brother, but they _loved_ to push his buttons and see how far they could get with him... They lived to test him and Arthur could already feel his blood pressure beginning to rise.

"Maybe so, but remind me, how much have ya'll put toward the camp funds?" Arthur questioned, sending an unamused expression their way, watching Mac roll his eyes.

"I'd hope you'd bring more since you're never here anymore." Bill then huffed from Arthur's left.

"Not you too." Arthur groaned and leaned his head back as Dutch stood back and watched the events unfold with just the slightest look of mirth in his obsidian hues, Arthur was a big boy after all and he could fight his own battles.

"I have to admit Arthur, you have been gone a lot lately." He eventually said, though Arthur could tell that Dutch was now beginning to read him, and he frowned slightly in response, he didn't appreciate being ganged up on even if Dutch wasn't coming from a hostile place. "You're not a people person, don't tell me you're goin' a little soft." He mused playfully.

"Shut up." Arthur sighed. "They pay well, that's obvious enough from my contributions ain't that right?" He inquired.

"I suppose... But you've been getting a little chummy with the locals haven't you? I seen you walkin' around with some little blonde maggot." He chortled softly.

Arthur was used to being the butt of the joke on more than on occasion, so it didn't bother him that Dutch was poking fun at him... But when the other insulted Vincent... It actually almost soured Arthur's mood, though he kept himself neutral on the outside. Dutch had been watching him..?

"What's the point you're gettin' at, Dutch?" He asked, his tone strained with annoyance.

"Come with me." Dutch replied before nodding toward his tent.

Blinking, Arthur tilted his head before beginning to follow him, though sending a venomous glare toward Mac who waved him off lazily. Arthur would teach him in time to keep his fucking mouth shut, though when he finally slipped into Dutch's tent Arthur could already tell this wasn't going anywhere nice.

"I saw that ranch you been workin' on-"

"You spyin' on me, Dutch?" Arthur inquired, narrowing his eyes slightly at the other, though the other seemed surprised at the accusation.

"What? No. I rarely see you anymore, I wanted to know what was takin' your time away from _here_." Dutch replied, his tone hinting at a warning to Arthur, who actually gulped and shifted in his stance uncomfortably and he decided to keep his mouth shut until Dutch was finished. "Anyway, the bank there, it's a small operation, we might almost have better luck goin' after the people who likely control the bank in the area... What are your employers like?" He inquired.

Arthur felt an ice-cold sensation shoot through his entire body even at the prospect of robbing Vincent and his father... Especially after all they had gone through as a family, and yet still welcomed Arthur regardless, but he wasn't about to go against Dutch either if he could help it.

"Uh... They're good people I guess, they don't really seem the type with a hidden cache of treasures, Dutch." He replied.

"You'd be surprised at how much money people like that are sittin' on, besides you know rural banks are always a risk. Is it even worth alerting the law to the bank if the pay off ain't worth it?" Dutch sighed.

"Well, it _is_ the only bank in town, it has to have somethin' don't it?"

"Not necessarily, when banks get big payloads from a bunch of different places like that, they often have more wagons transferring large sums out of the area specifically to keep vagabonds like _us_ from gettin' to it." He explained, watching Arthur sigh softly. "... Why?" Dutch then asked, noting Arthur's energy. "It's not like you to resist a job like this." He mentioned.

"It's nothin'... They really are good people I guess, that's all... Doesn't feel completely right." He admitted, though when he looked to Dutch, the other had an unreadable expression and as he stepped toward Arthur, his eyes bored into his most trusted gun.

"... You're makin' me nervous, Arthur." He stated, watching anger and defiance light up openly in Arthur's eyes.

"Excuse me?" he asked, narrowing his eyes back at Dutch.

"Calm down, son. I didn't mean it like-"

"Like what?" Arthur asked, though when it seemed Dutch had lost his nerve, Arthur scoffed. "That's what I thought... Keep in mind Dutch, I _ain't_ the one who up and deserted us... Don't punish me because of John." He reminded seriously, finally seeing regret cross Dutch's eyes.

"... You're right." Dutch admitted after a few moments, making Arthur calm a bit. "I'm sorry... I wasn't tryin' to act like I was accusing you of anything, I should know better... Just remember Arthur, we're hanging in a real delicate balance... We can't afford any weaknesses."

Arthur wanted to be angry at Dutch for even suggesting that Vincent was a weakness but... He couldn't be, because he knew Dutch was right, Vincent was very easily becoming one of Arthur's weaknesses and that was dangerous in many ways. Blinking, the outrage finally simmered in his eyes and he eventually just nodded and seeing Dutch smile at him once again, Arthur started to relax a bit... This was his home... He couldn't forget that.

"Maybe I just missed you, too." Dutch then mentioned to break some of the tension in the room, and Arthur hated that his heart still fluttered when he saw the familiar hue in Dutch's eyes.

"Shut up, I doubt you even noticed." Arthur snorted after finally having calmed down, though as Dutch rested a hand on his shoulder, Arthur took a breath.

"... I'm sorry." He said again, watching Arthur's features soften a bit. "Besides, like you said it's not like we even got to worry about goin' after anyone's money yet anyway... Hosea's been skulkin' around Wolf's Trail and I've been diggin' in Copper Lake, but we ain't even near ready to start plannin'."

"... We're good, Dutch." Arthur eventually replied just to torture the other a bit, but seeing relief flood over Dutch's expression he smiled a bit.

* * *

As Arthur rode toward town, the conversation between him and Dutch continued to replay in his head over and over again... And he couldn't help but be hurt that Dutch would even suggest that his loyalty was wavering. Arthur wasn't a man who took things seriously a lot of the time and he was known for taking his patience after Dutch and his level-headedness from Hosea, but he was shocked to find that his feelings were really hurt.

Sighing, Arthur thought back to the last month, he _had_ been spending a whole lot of time at the Taylor's Ranch, was he getting soft..? He hadn't really thought about how spending a lot of time there would look, and even though Dutch denied spying on him...

Had he become too invested in the ranch? Why would Dutch go out of his way to watch Arthur if Arthur was supposedly his most trusted friend?

Frowning, Arthur knew these kinds of thoughts were dangerous to have, but as he got closer to town he found himself becoming distracted by a large pillar of smoke in the distance... Furrowing his brows, Arthur kicked The Admiral, whose leg had healed nicely thanks to the blonde maggot, to put him into a gallop and as he rolled into town he could see people running in the direction of Vincent's home.

"Fire! Fire!" He heard someone scream and Arthur's heart fell into his stomach almost instantly.

"C'mon boy!" Arthur snapped before hurrying his horse toward the ranch and praying he was scared for no reason.

However, when the property finally came into view, Arthur gasped... The barn... It was engulfed in flames, he could see dozens of people desperately trying to put out the flames and Arthur didn't hesitate to rush forward. He could feel the heat beginning to permeate off the structure the closer he got, and as Arthur looked around, Vincent was nowhere in sight.

Thankfully the house was still standing, but Arthur would be damned if he allowed these people to lose more than they already had. Nearly throwing himself off his horse and sprinting toward the fire, one of the hands glanced to him.

"Callahan! Thank god you're here!" He gasped.

"What the hell happened!?" Arthur asked.

"W-We have no idea! The barn was consumed before we could even get our bearings!"

"Where's Vincent and Abraham!?"

"Right behind you, Callahan!" Abraham responded from behind him, and when Arthur turned he could see the other on horseback guiding a fire engine from town. "Men! Get these hoses going! Help the firefighters!" He yelled, watching as his ranch workers, as well as volunteers from town, began to rush toward the engine to help get the hoses ready.

However as Arthur looked over to Abraham, he could see the sorrow and anger behind his eyes at losing such a significant structure once more to fire. Arthur actually considered asking if he was in the way before a familiar worker came running toward them.

"Sir! Mister Taylor!" he cried breathlessly.

"Calm down, boy, the fire engine is here-"

"Vincent is in there!"

"What!?"

Arthur's eyes widened before he looked back to the blaze... When he first arrived, his first thought was that he had hoped there was no one inside, the fire was already huge and violent... It looked hopeless for anyone who was trapped inside and knowing Vincent was in there... Arthur turned and looked back to Abraham whose expression seemed like nothing but terror as he looked to the fire.

Blinking, Arthur took a breath before approaching Abraham, who looked to Arthur... And he could see it in Arthur's eyes, and as Arthur reached down and quickly took his belt off that contained his gun holsters and calmly handing it over in silence. For a moment, Abraham seemed confused as he reached forward and took the object, but without any hesitation, Arthur turned on his heel... And began sprinting toward the barn.

"C-Callahan!" Abraham screamed as he watched Arthur disappear into the burning building.

Arthur blocked out all fear and all doubts as he ran forward... And the closer he got, the faster his heartbeat and with one final breath of fresh air, he was surrounded by smoke and debris. It wasn't longer than a few seconds before Arthur began coughing and reached up to put his bandana over his nose and mouth as well as shielding his face a bit with his arm, but it didn't help much.

Visibility was little to none... Smoke burned Arthur's eyes and his lungs as he traversed through the flames, narrowly escaping death already. He knew to expect to even find Vincent's body was unlikely, but... He couldn't leave. He couldn't run away knowing that Vincent was here.

Hearing a creaking from above him, Arthur gasped and looked up and nearly missed a support beam crashing down on top of him. Diving to the side and panting, desperately trying to catch his breath while he was on the floor, sweat rolled down his face and the heat against his body already made him feel like he was suffocating without the help of the smoke... And as Arthur looked behind him his heart dropped when he realized that the front door to the barn had been blocked.

This was beginning to look like his grave just as much as Vincent's... He couldn't catch his breath and his body was becoming weak from the lack of oxygen... For a moment, Arthur almost considered not getting up...

However, as Arthur looked to his right, his eyes widened... In one of the stalls, he could see someone's legs and boots. Hacking again, Arthur managed to roll onto his stomach and push himself up enough to crawl toward the stall as fire rained began to rain down from above and as he got closer to the man, he reached forward and rolled him over... And there he was.

"Shit..." Arthur panted as he saw Vincent laying there, his eyes closed and his body limp, if he was lucky the smoke finished him off before the flames but with that thought, Arthur's heart clenched painfully in his chest, there was no way he was letting Vincent's body burn here even if he was dead.

In a quick inspection, he could see that Vincent had a few serious burns on his arm but otherwise seemed intact... But now was the challenge of figuring out how to get out of here... They might have been dead no matter what.

"... Arthur." Vincent's voice cut through the planning in Arthur's head and he didn't hesitate to look down and pull off his bandana.

Vincent's eyes were barely open, his face filthy with ash and soot but all Arthur could feel was relief that he had come when he did, even if they weren't getting out of here.

"Hey there." Arthur chuckled softly, reaching down and carefully bringing Vincent up.

"Y-... You need to get outta here..." Vincent muttered hoarsely, the smoke had obviously done a number on him already.

"You kiddin'? I came in here for you, if you think I'm leavin' without you, you're crazy." Arthur replied as his eyes kept searching for means of escape... Only to find that there were none.

"... You're gonna die because of me." Vincent then sighed, but Arthur looked down at the other and just smiled.

"... Unlike you, I've had it comin' for a long time." He mentioned before reaching down and caressing one of Vincent's cheeks and brushing a stray strand of his blonde hair out of his face.

Vincent seemed to lean into the touch, but as his beautiful silver eyes searched up at met Arthur's... They rolled back and fluttered shut before his body went limp in Arthur's arms once more... And Arthur's heart felt like it was breaking.

Releasing a shuddered breath, Arthur wished he had gotten here sooner... For a moment, everything in Arthur's life began to pass by him in slow motion. He remembered meeting Dutch and Hosea and recalling what a little shit he was, and then picking up John almost a decade later only to find get a taste of his own medicine when John proved to be just as difficult in his childhood.

Just thinking of John... Arthur found he wasn't angry now... He just wished he knew why the other had left.

_He looks like his daddy..._

Arthur's eyes shut as he realized that his fate was sealed, he wasn't escaping from here... He wondered if Abigail would be angry, but he knew her better and he hated himself for making her fall for him... A man with perversions beyond what was damnable, a man who could never give her what she deserved.

However as Arthur opened his eyes and looked up, he noticed that the smoke was flowing in a specific direction... That was odd. Looking down to Vincent, Arthur did what he could to take a breath and hoist the other up into his arms despite his muscles failing. He was able to push himself into getting his second wind and began to walk toward the direction of the airflow...

As they got closer to the back of the barn, Arthur could see a small opening on the floor where the trapped smoke had been escaping... If they had any chance of making it through, this was it. Arthur cursed remembering he left his guns outside, otherwise, he could have blasted his way out if he needed to, but recalling that he still had his knife, Arthur placed Vincent onto the floor as gently as he could before unsheathing his weapon and sinking it between the planks of wood that held the wall together. Arthur pushed with all his might until the wood gave and he was able to pry the boards away.

Once more, Arthur could hear the foreboding creaking above his head and he knew that in just minutes, he and Vincent would be buried beneath the remnants of the barn. Gaining some of the last of his strength, Arthur readied himself and put his boot through the remaining boards, thankfully the fire had weakened the structure and the force gave Arthur just enough room to crawl out.

After dragging himself out on his stomach, Arthur reached back in and was just barely able to reach Vincent's shirt before nearly yanking him out from the burning building... But they weren't out of the woods yet, before Arthur could even catch his breath he could see the integrity of the barn deteriorate beyond salvation and it was beginning to waver and lean...

Reaching down, Arthur grabbed ahold of Vincent's seemingly lifeless body before throwing him over his shoulder and running as fast as his legs could carry him away from the barn... Arthur could hear it groaning and beginning to give, and he only stopped running when he heard the large crash behind him. Falling to his knees, Arthur looked behind him to see that the barn had missed he and Vincent by only twenty or so feet... They were safe from the fire but now...

Arthur's eyes immediately focused back on Vincent as he laid the smaller man onto the ground and he shuffled over to his side.

"Shit... C'mon, kid." Arthur muttered before reaching down and ripping Vincent's shirt open before leaning down and listening carefully... Vincent wasn't breathing. "Fuck!" He snarled.

However, before Arthur could slip into the despair of his failure, another memory ran through his mind... He remembered when his dog Copper nearly drowned in the lake as a pup, Dutch ended up saving his life by blowing air into his lungs. Had this not been such a dire situation, Arthur might have blushed, but he didn't waste time.

"Over here! They're over here!" He could hear someone yell.

Arthur didn't even glance up, he just leaned in and placed his lips over Vincent's and blew inward, and once he was done he pulled away quickly and listened again. Nothing... Once again, Arthur leaned in and delivered another breath to Vincent as people started to gather around.

"Out of my way!" Abraham yelled and shoved through the crowd until he came upon Arthur hovering over his son and he was speechless, dropping to his knees beside Arthur who continued working without pause.

Silence overtook the crew and they had begun to take their hats off as it seemed that Vincent was dead... But one more time... Arthur leaned in and pressed his lips to Vincent and blew inward...

When Arthur pulled back, he felt his shoulders beginning to tremble as he realized his efforts seemed to be in vain... He was too late. Finally looking up to Abraham, the man looked utterly broken staring down in disbelief at Vincent's body.

"I-I-..."

Without warning, Vincent gasped out loudly, the sound was almost ungodly without violent it was, it actually made Arthur jump but as he looked back down, Vincent's eyes fluttered open and his chest had begun rising and falling weakly again.

Arthur didn't even hear the cheering the had started around them, he was just so fucking thankful to see those gorgeous argent hues look up to his... And Arthur was finally able to catch his breath.

"Vince..?" Abraham muttered, almost seeming nervous to be optimistic, but as Vincent's eyes slowly surfed over to look at him, Arthur could see tears forming in the stoic man's eyes.

"... Sorry, pa... I-... I didn't want the horses to get hurt..." Vincent mumbled, but Abraham seemed to chuckle softly, albeit tearfully for a moment.

"You stupid boy." he sighed but his tone was laced with relief, the sight alone was heartwarming.

"... Arthur saved me." Vincent them muttered, making Arthur tense slightly, he didn't feel he needed praise for this but seeing Abraham look up at him with nothing but gratitude he relaxed a bit.

"... I owe you everything, Arthur." He stated seriously, but Arthur shook his head quickly, though when he felt a prodding sensation at his hand, Arthur looked down to see that Vincent's fingers were slowly moving toward his... And his heart skipped a beat.

Glancing up to Vincent's face he could see the other smiling at him, and Arthur couldn't stop the corners of his mouth from turning upward and his hand inched forward to discreetly take the other's and caressing the back of it gently.

"Out of the way! Doctor comin' through!" A voice broke through the crowd and Arthur looked up to see a man with a large medical bag rushing forward to Vincent's side opposite from Arthur.

While Arthur drowned out most of the medical nonsense that he didn't understand, what he _was_ able to figure out was that Vincent was far from being in the clear but he was alive and that was the first step in recovery. All Arthur could do was look at Vincent and it seemed the other had focused on him as well... His heart felt like it was going to jump out of his chest and all at once he remembered how he thought about quitting and he wondered how he could be so stupid..? He couldn't quit... Even if he really wanted to.

_I could never quit you._

Arthur swallowed harshly at the remembrance of the man he once loved... But that man was gone...

Why was he thinking about John? More importantly, why was he suddenly beginning to feel that pull becoming stronger and stronger?

"You think we can get him to a bed so that I can examine him more thoroughly?" The doctor asked, finally pulling Arthur out of his head.

"Surely we can, thank you again, Arthur. I can take it from here." Abraham mentioned, momentarily disheartening Arthur but he nodded.

"O-Of course." He muttered, though he still felt Vincent weakly clutching his hand until Abraham picked him up into his arms... And his hand slipped away.

Arthur could feel the hands of multiple people clapping and patting his back as he stood back up and nodded a bit bashfully before finally turning back and looking back toward the barn. The hoses were spewing water though since it had collapsed the fire had snuffed out quite a bit... At least it wouldn't spread.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOL sorry I know a lot went on in this chapter, but I hope it was worth the read! Now things are REALLY heating up (literally lmao I hate myself). As always thank you everyone for your kind words!  
> -Eros


	7. Scars and Stories

Arthur ended up needing a few patches here and there on his body from the fire but he got off a lot better than Vincent had. Thankfully there was no loss of life which was somewhat remarkable and after the collapse of the barn, the firefighters were finally able to put out the rest of the blaze. The first thing that needed to be taken care of was rearranging the animals since there were a few holding pens that were connected to the now downed barn, but Arthur was given some time to rest after his death-defying acts.

As he walked toward the house, Arthur glanced down to his shirt and noted a few holes and sighed softly knowing that this shirt was ruined... And he didn't bring a spare since he wasn't really prepared for this to happen. However, Arthur just parked himself on the farmhouse porch and allowed himself just to breathe. He ended up coughing a few times but ultimately seemed to come out mostly unscathed. When he finally looked up and he seemed to calm he watched as people had begun to go through the wreckage of what remained of the barn.

This day surely hadn't gone the way Arthur had planned it, though as he heard the front door open and shut behind him, he quickly turned back to see Abraham stepping out with the doctor, and Arthur was quick to get up and move out of their way.

"As long as he gets some rest and avoids anymore smoke, he should come out of it. Give him garlic if he starts to get a fever, the danger now is those burns gettin' infected." The doctor explained.

"I'm sure his mother still has some kind of salve layin' around that could help as well." Abraham noted, not even realizing that Arthur was there at first. "Thank you doctor." He mentioned before seeing the medical professional out, only then did he look in Arthur's direction and seemed pleasantly surprised. "Oh, Arthur." He greeted.

"Sorry, I wasn't tryin' to eavesdrop... I was sitting over here on the steps." He explained but Abraham waved him off.

"Oh, it's no worry about that... Hell, if it weren't for you runnin' in there like a bat outta hell..." Abraham trailed off and shook his head before taking a breath. "I know I wasn't exactly sure about you but... I wouldn't have been able to cope with losin' another child. So thank you, Arthur, you'll always have a place here." He stated, making Arthur reach up and rub the back of his neck almost shyly.

"I-I just... Ran." Arthur then said. "I didn't think or anything I just... I dunno I just ran." He mumbled and cleared his throat, and for the first time he could see a smile form beneath the facial hair the aligned the detached rancher's face.

"Well, thank you for doin' what I couldn't... Don't worry about any of the cleanup, you've done more than enough." Abraham mentioned, seeing relief consume Arthur's features, though as he turned to leave, Arthur spoke up.

"Uh, w-wait!" He blurted and watched Abraham turn back. "... You think I could see him?" He murmured almost blushing.

"I'm pretty sure he's asleep, but you're more than welcome his room is on the first floor near the storage room on the side of the house. Just let him rest." Abraham instructed. "Though you might wanna clean yourself up." He chuckled softly and motioned up toward his face, it was then that Arthur actually glanced down to his arms and realized he was filthy as well.

"O-Of course, thanks." Arthur replied before watching the burlier of the two walk away.

Though even after Abraham had gone, Arthur had some reservations about going inside... His heart felt like it was trembling, almost as if even though the doctor had said Vincent was okay, his mind kept formulating the worst-case scenario. Arthur couldn't deny how good Vincent's hand felt in his... However, the first thing on his mind was washing his face and hands.

Managing to walk up to the door, he only hesitated for a moment since he was given express permission by Abraham to enter his house... But he still felt weird just walking into someone's home, however as he made his way into the kitchen, he almost felt lonely without Vincent here at his side. Once more that worry plagued him, but he didn't hesitate in running the water and beginning to scrub the soot off his hands and arms. He'd definitely need a bath soon.

Arthur then cupped some water in his hands and splashed it into his face, seeing the blackness flow down the sink. It took Arthur about fifteen minutes to completely wash his hands, arms, face and neck before finally slicking his hair back with some water before reaching over and grabbing the towel he had used previously and wiping himself dry.

Now though... It was time to go see Vincent, and for a moment Arthur wasn't sure he'd have the balls to continue, however as he recalled where Abraham said Vincent's room was, Arthur furrowed his brows slightly. Had he really been that close to his room that whole time?

Walking toward the hall where the side storage room was, where Arthur had been staying, he noted only one door at the end of the hallway... Gulping, he ventured forward and as he got closer he saw that the door was cracked just a bit, and as he reached up and rested his palm on the door he paused. He could walk away right now...

But he pushed the door open slowly, and he couldn't help but be relieved to see that Vincent was there, on his bed propped up by some pillows, now cleaned up and bandaged... And he was breathing.

Arthur blinked and looked around a bit, almost as if he would sully the room by walking inside... But with one foot after another, he walked forward, and he could see a chair had already been positioned at the bedside most likely by Abraham. He carefully pulled it closer to the bed and sat down as he was finally able to get a look at the extent of Vincent's injuries. He was shirtless but it seemed like only his right arm had taken the brunt of the damage, it was pretty much wrapped up all the way to his shoulder and then some, but other than that... Arthur didn't see anything really life-threatening.

It seemed like for once Arthur was finally able to take a breath of relief as he reached down and paused before delicately taking Vincent's uninjured hand as he recalled how right it felt in his... Though Vincent's hand was limp, it was warm... And it only relieved Arthur further as he watched his thumb run across the back of Vincent's hand. However, before long, he felt Vincent's fingers twitching and as he looked up to the other's expression, he could see his brows beginning to furrow and his eyes flutter.

Though when Vincent seemed to wake up, the expression on his face was nothing short of agony and his hand began to tremble in Arthur's as he inhaled deeply and groaned a low guttural sound that only broke Arthur's heart with how excruciating it sounded. Burns were hell to go through if they didn't take your life, they were some of the worst injuries to heal from and Vincent's arm was covered in them, Arthur had seen strong men whither and die from the intensity of burns.

"C-... Can you... A-Anything... Whiskey... The pain..." Vincent almost whimpered unable to form clear wording just due to the pain, and Arthur was quick to jump up and nearly sprinted into the kitchen.

Opening cabinet after cabinet, he cursed under his breath until he recalled Vincent pulling the expensive stuff out of the same cabinet that contained the ointment he had used on Arthur's hand and he quickly threw open the door to see that the bottle was still there and there was at least half the bottle left. How the doctor had forgotten to give Vincent some kind of pain relief was beyond him, but he didn't even waste time in getting a glass before rushing back into the room.

"Here, just be careful, partner." Arthur mentioned softly as Vincent snatched the bottle with his good hand and didn't hesitate on tipping it backward and giving a few good swallows before quickly taking it away and hacking, Arthur frowned at his condition once he heard Vincent's lungs beginning to wheeze from the smoke inhalation.

"S-... Sorry." Vincent finally mumbled as he eventually caught his breath and managed to look over more clearly at Arthur.

"What? Why are you sorry?" Arthur inquired incredulously.

"Well... I'm sure you weren't prepared to come to save my ass... Thank you again." Vincent replied, watching Arthur roll his eyes.

"For the love of god, stop thankin' me." He chortled in good humor as he looked down at Vincent. "If you'd died I'd have no reason to come back here." He admitted, but his expression fell as he realized what he had said and he was quick to clear his throat and try to recover as smoothly as he could, though Vincent finally seemed to smile despite the pain he was going through.

"That true?" He asked.

"... Maybe." Arthur muttered and averted his gaze shyly before once more he felt Vincent's hand grasp at his, when he looked down to see their joined hands Arthur wondered for a moment how he'd be able to leave once all this was said and done, Arthur didn't see them staying in this area forever.

The thought made him sigh softly and frown but it just made him hold Vincent's hand tighter. As he glanced up and met the silver pools that Arthur was certain he'd never see again when they fluttered shut in the barn... He knew he couldn't stay away even if he tried.

"What're you thinkin' about, Arthur?" Vincent asked curiously, tilting his head over at him.

"Ah... Nothin' really... Guess I'm just glad you're safe." Arthur replied with a smile over at the other. "Any idea when you'll be up again?"

"I was pretty out of it when the doctor was workin' but... Surely once I'm able to breathe easy I should be okay, it's just my arm that's burned so as long as I keep it covered I should be permitted to at least leave the house." Vincent replied, relieving Arthur a bit further.

"Good... I still owe you a date." He mentioned smirking over at Vincent who seemed to blush and smile, though Arthur's expression fell not long after once he saw Vincent grimace and take another drink. "I've only ever got burned real back once as a kid and not like this, I can't imagine what you're goin' through." He sighed.

"That's alright... How'd you manage to burn yourself?" Vincent inquired most likely to distract himself from the pain, and while Arthur wanted to oblige him he hesitated just because Arthur wasn't fond of disclosing personal things about himself.

"... I didn't." Arthur muttered, shifting somewhat uncomfortably, though seeing confusion sweep over Vincent's visage he knew he had to elaborate. "When I was... Nine or ten maybe, after my mother died I was runnin' with my father for a while since I didn't really have anywhere else to go. Well, one day I took a dollar from him without askin' cause there was this huge candy bar in the store in the town we was passin' through... When he found out what I did, he made me stand on hot coals on the fire until I collapsed... Wasn't so fond of sweets after that." He explained and eventually shrugged, seeing a slightly horrified expression on Vincent's face.

"Jesus Christ, that's horrible Arthur. I'm so sorry." He said before suddenly intertwining his fingers with Arthur's and grasping it tighter, though Arthur chuckled softly and shook his head.

"I couldn't walk for a week, but I'm alright now, and I think I was still better off than you... I got plenty of scars beyond that anyway." He mentioned off-handedly before he glanced down to their conjoined hands briefly, though when he looked back up to Vincent the other was actually smirking.

"Plenty huh..? I'm sure you got plenty of stories too then." He mused.

"Maybe..." Arthur teased slightly.

"... What about the one on your chin?" Vincent inquired curiously, making Arthur chortle softly at his signature wound.

There was a brief moment when Arthur recalled John asking about it when they were stranded together by that river years back... Yet for the first time, a memory of John wasn't overwhelmingly painful, he was able to look back on it almost fondly, though he wasn't sure what that meant.

"I was young and foolish, thinkin' with the head between my legs... When me and my mentors were hold up in this town years back, I was sleepin' with the mayor's daughter, when he found out he smashed a bottle in my face." he recalled, watching Vincent actually laugh though he cringed soon after.

"Ah! Don't make me laugh!" he cried as he desperately tried to keep his laughing fits in.

"Sorry!" Arthur then snorted as he started to laugh as well.

For the next hour or so, Vincent asked about Arthur's scars and Arthur responded as honestly as he could unless it had something to do with a crime that he had committed. Even though Arthur talked a lot about himself, all he could think about was the fucking beautiful man in front of him... And how happy he was that he was alive. As they talked and laughed, Arthur was able to relax and really _look_ at Vincent... His shirtless chest made making eye-contact rather difficult.

"You look tired..." Arthur finally observed as he saw Vincent lay back and his eyes lulling a bit.

"I am... Whiskey is finally doin' its job." He sighed before pulling Arthur's hand up toward his face and gently leaning his cheek into the back of it, warming Arthur's heart far more than he was willing to admit. "... Arthur, will you stay..? At least for a little while?" He then asked.

Arthur frowned just momentarily as he recalled his discussion with Dutch earlier in the day.

_Just remember Arthur, we're hanging in a real delicate balance... We can't afford any weaknesses._

Fuck that, Arthur wasn't the one who had a problem with loyalty.

"O'course..." He replied, nodding to Vincent before offering a smile and was pleased not to feel a fever against Vincent's cheek.

"Thanks... Will I see you tomorrow then..?" He asked, finally letting Arthur's hand go from his cheek and relaxing fully against the bed.

"You know it." Arthur replied softly, though it seemed as if Vincent had passed out before he could reply and Arthur sighed in relief.

Now that Vincent was asleep, Arthur sat back for a moment to really... Process the events that had been laid out for him. There were many things going through Arthur's mind, one thing, in particular, was when he and Vincent had been discussing the scar on his chin and he recalled the memory of John and he felt... Fine? It didn't make sense, memories of John were lessons to keep Arthur from doing something stupid again but...

Reaching up and rubbing his eyes as he then remembered Vincent's eyes fluttering shut in that barn and how painful that had been. What did it all mean..?

Was he... Falling for Vincent?

No, that didn't make sense. That _wasn't_ happening, Arthur didn't fall for other men, John was the only exception and Dutch... He didn't even know how to start with that, but they were never in love, they never had the connection like he and John had. Surely Arthur was just interested in getting into the other man's pants, there was _no way_ he was falling in love with Vincent... Right?

Panic began to build in Arthur's chest as he sat there, he wasn't ready to love someone else again, and if there _was_ someone who was deserving of his love it was Abigail with his fucking child... But it just... Things with her didn't fulfill him anymore, sure he got a physical release out of it but he just felt empty when they were done... Sure, in the moment he always felt like he could love her but at the end of the day...

Men weren't supposed to fall for other men, it was just unnatural. Fucking them and using them to dampen his urges were one thing but... Arthur was _not_ that far gone yet, was he?

For what felt like hours, Arthur sat there asking nearly every existential question about himself as he stared up at the ceiling, but eventually his head fell back down and his gaze fell onto the injured man that laid in the bed... And suddenly all those self-loathing thoughts and doubts began to melt away, Arthur felt nothing but calm.

No... He wasn't ready for this... Not yet...

However, Arthur stood up and took a step forward before reaching down and running a hand delicately through Vincent's slightly untamed curly locks since he had gone through hell in the barn... But they were still so soft... Almost like he was running a hand through silk, and a few of his extra kinky strands would coil around Arthur's fingers, and he found that he loved it, but what he loved more was when Vincent unconsciously leaned into the touch.

_Shit._

Taking a breath, Arthur finally found it in himself to pull his hand away carefully and knew he had to leave now while he could. He would keep his promise and stay, but maybe in the end it would be smarter to quit after all...

* * *

_October 21st, 1895_

_Been four days since the fire, it still flabbergasts me that a fire that large managed to form in the middle of the day like that. Mister Taylor insists that he's going to look into the cause since it almost killed his son and destroyed his livelihood, it's somewhat incredible to me how he's kept himself calm. I've gotten better since my youth, but after having suffered so greatly, it makes me wonder where he finds his strength, though I'm sure if I hadn't managed to get Vincent out of there, there would be a far different ending to this story._

_Speaking of which, I can't believe that kid almost kicked the bucket on me. What still scares me now was how terrified I was in the barn, and not because incoming demise. When I thought I saw Vincent die I just... I don't know, it felt different than things have before... It was like a gunshot to my chest._

_Thankfully, after I explained to Dutch what had happened to the property, he was much more forgiving about me being gone more than normal. He's not the monster the government paints him out to be and I know that once he sees what kind of people Vincent and his father are, I'll have no problems convincing him to leave them be. However, at the prospect of him meeting Vincent, I feel like a young boy again, about to be embarrassed by my parents._

Arthur smiled a bit before chortling briefly and shaking his head at his journal as he thought of his entry. Dutch had been far less on his ass about being gone from camp especially after that little moment between them in the tent, Dutch had never questioned his loyalty since, and even though it had only been a few days, every single one counted. Vincent had been healing nicely and no longer coughed, even though the long-term effects were unknown he seemed like he was going to make a full recovery. The only things that would hinder it were his burns, though even in the short period of time they also showed major promise.

Thinking about Vincent, Arthur sat up from against the wall in the storage room on the side of the other's house that he currently called a temporary safe haven and pushed himself up from the floor. He was sure that Vincent was still in his room since he had gotten injured he typically wasn't up until around nine in the morning, and though Arthur still didn't have a watch, he never slept that long anyway.

However, a shriek down the hall had Arthur bolting down there nearly at the speed of sound but thankfully the door was open and Arthur could see was Vincent changing his bandages.

"The hell are you doin'? I was just down the hall, ya know." Arthur slightly chided as he walked forward to help Vincent.

"I-I'm gonna have to do it myself eventually aren't I..?" Vincent inquired.

"Yeah... Eventually." Arthur replied bluntly with an arched brow, watching Vincent actually blush at his own foolishness before huffing and frowning.

"S-Sorry... I was hopin' you'd never have to look at them." He stammered, though Arthur seemed unfazed and he quickly shook his head as he took a seat next to Vincent on the side of his injured arm so that he could slowly and carefully unwrap the bandages.

"I've seen worse." Arthur mentioned casually.

"You've certainly lived an exciting life, Arthur. Hard to believe you've just fallen on hard times with work sometimes." Vincent chuckled, though it was a subtle reminder to Arthur to watch what he said.

"Well like you've said, I've had an excitin' life." He mentioned as he transitioned into taking the bandage off Vincent's forearm from his shoulder and bicep.

Arthur's movements were slow and calculated to keep from causing Vincent any more pain than necessary but since the burns were still new, they were sticking to the bandages which only caused more excruciating expressions from the younger man beside him, but he never cried. Arthur wouldn't have blamed him if he had, hell Arthur might have even shed a few tears with this level of injury but Vincent took it with grace.

"You're doin' good." Arthur mentioned. "We're almost done."

"I ain't a child." Vincent actually growled, though Arthur knew it was due to the pain and he nodded.

"I know." He replied simply, but after a pause, Vincent sighed.

"Sorry." He mumbled.

"I know." Arthur repeated, though he glanced over to Vincent and sent a wink to him and seeing him relax.

When the last of the bandages finally came off, Vincent breathed a literal physical sigh of relief as he felt his burns begin to air out a little, though not long after he cringed a bit since the air had begun to sting them. Nothing was comfortable for burns, and Arthur just wished he could take the pain away.

"I dunno what I hate more, the bandages or the air." Vincent chuckled in a strained fashion after a minute or so.

"Here, let's get the new bandages on, the longer they're exposed the worse they're gonna get." Arthur instructed and watched Vincent nod.

"There's... A jar in the nightstand there, can you get it for me?" Vincent inquired, to which Arthur did without question.

Though, as he opened the drawer and saw the jar in question after he pulled out there was just a split second that he noticed what it was sitting on top of. He didn't linger long since he didn't want to appear like he was snooping but he noticed a picture frame in the drawer and the picture was of another man. Arthur was quick to just stow the information away in his head like he had done in the past before sitting back down next to Vincent and holding out the jar.

"... Do you... Think you can put some of that stuff on the burns? I can get the ones on my arm but on the back of my shoulder I can't reach that far." He sighed in exasperation and once again Arthur nodded.

"O'course." He replied, but as he watched Vincent stand up and shrug his already unbuttoned shirt off his body, Arthur had to stifle a gulp, despite the injuries on Vincent's once flawless skin, he was still beautiful to look at.

When Vincent sat back down, he faced away from Arthur a bit so the other could get the salve on his back... And boy was Vincent's back a sight. It wasn't especially different from other people he had seen but just the fact that it was _his_ back nearly made Arthur's hormones crazy as he noted the muscle definition. This was not fair at all.

However, Arthur just took a breath and dipped his fingers into the jar and carefully began to slather it onto the burns that resided on the back of Vincent's shoulders and he couldn't help feeling guilty when he heard the other hiss and saw his fist clutching the bed sheets tightly in pain.

"Sorry..." he mumbled.

"N-No it's alright... That stuff is aloe-based... I-It'll help in time." Vincent panted and Arthur tried to be fast but not clumsy.

When he was satisfied, he gently tapped Vincent's leg so he'd turn, there was no reason in both of their hands getting dirty anyway. Arthur just continued spreading the ointment onto Vincent's arm until they were both satisfied, and now that he had seen them fully for himself, Arthur could see that the worst of it was definitely near Vincent's wrist and hand and there was also one pretty nasty one on the back of his shoulder, otherwise the others didn't seem beyond the surface level and would probably heal in a week or so.

"Thank you, Arthur." Vincent sighed, though seeing a nervous expression on Arthur's face he arched a brow.

"... We still gotta wrap it." He muttered.

"... Shit." Vincent actually chuckled and shook his head since he had completely forgotten about that part. "Ah, it's alright... Takin' them off is a lot worse than puttin' them on." He sighed.

"Remember than when I'm tightening them alright?" Arthur chortled before beginning to apply the bandages to his medicated arm.

As expected, Vincent spewed a colorful array of curses when Arthur began to tighten the wrappings, but Arthur was quick, and wrapping them was far faster than taking them off. In total, the process had probably taken twenty minutes from start to finish.

"How you feelin'..?" Arthur asked once all was said and done.

"Like shit." Vincent chuckled breathlessly.

"Not hot though? No fever?" Arthur couldn't help but inquire, but when he saw Vincent smirk over at him he almost blushed.

"Aw, Arthur are you worried about little ol' me?" He asked.

"No." Arthur responded defiantly as his cheeks really began heating up, but Vincent laughed regardless and bumped Arthur's knee with his own.

"Sure. I'll remember that... By the way, I was thinkin' about our date..." He mentioned before sending a small almost amorous gaze toward Arthur, which caught him completely off guard. "Why don't we do it tonight..?" He asked, but Arthur was quick to frown.

"You sure you're up for that..? Hell, look what you just went through." Arthur countered, worry lacing his expression.

"It's alright... There's a bar within walkin' distance and I can do that just fine." Vincent replied, though Arthur wasn't really convinced.

"... Compromise, we ride my horse, you think you can do that?" Arthur asked, arching a brow, and though Vincent sighed and rolled his eyes he nodded.

"I suppose... I have a sling anyway." Vincent replied before he stood from the bed and walked over to his wardrobe where the sling he had mentioned was hanging on one of the knobs.

Vincent grabbed it while Arthur handed him his shirt back to which he nodded thankfully and carefully slipped it over his head before adjusting his arm gently after he redressed. While Vincent did that, Arthur got a chance to look around Vincent's room a little more thoroughly. It was simple in design and he also had a few racks that Arthur assumed he had hunted on the wall as well as pictures, the blanket though, it was incredibly soft and obviously custom with a rich red design, Arthur was almost jealous, especially as he thought about that mystery man in the hidden photo.

"Hey, you ready?" Vincent asked, pulling Arthur out of his thoughts before he jumped up slightly in surprise. "Sorry, were you starin' into space?" He chortled.

"Guilty." Arthur replied before approaching the other and nodding. "Where we goin'?"

"Well, we got some time to kill before tonight... I wanna look at the barn since I haven't been able to get out too much. You wanna come with me?" Vincent asked.

"O'course... Lead the way." Arthur replied before standing beside the door for Vincent and nodding.

"Such a gentleman." He chuckled softly before brushing past Arthur.

"Only for you." Arthur snickered in response before following him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter was just basically fluff but fight me lmao I'm living for this development between Arthur and Vincent. I hope everyone is still enjoying and as always thank you so so much for reading! I've finally caught a groove with my writing!  
> -Eros


	8. Fighting What's Right

Arthur and Vincent walked out of the house at a leisurely pace, Arthur making sure that Vincent didn't become winded or show any signs of discomfort, but he seemed to be walking upright and rather well. For the first couple of days, Vincent was stuck in bed but on the third day he was up and walking, it was the first time since he had been outdoors since the incident.

"I'm thankful for the bandages, even though it's October, that sunlight would be unbearable on my arm." He observed with a small sigh of relief.

"Fire will do that to ya." Arthur snickered softly as he and Vincent continued forward toward the black piles of rubble that was once the proud barn of the Taylor's property.

"It's worse than I thought." Vincent sighed.

"You were in pretty bad shape." Arthur mentioned, it didn't really surprise him that Vincent didn't remember everything.

Frowning, Vincent walked forward into what was left of the structure with Arthur close in tow. Eventually, his uninjured hand came out to rest against one of the few remaining blackened support pillars with a small exhale.

"My great grandfather built this barn." He admitted, seeing Arthur frown in the corner of his eye.

"I'm sorry for your loss." He stated, though Vincent looked back to him with a gentle smile.

"It's alright... It's funny, my brother and I used to talk about how we were gonna knock down this place once ma and pa handed it over... But I never woulda burnt it down like this." He recalled.

"Speakin' of the fire, do you have any clue how it coulda happened? You were here first weren't you?" Arthur asked.

"Honestly I don't even know, I got up that mornin' like normal, everything was as it should be, so me and a few of the hands started the usual mornin' chores and the next time I looked behind me the fire was beyond puttin' out. The only thing that could have ignited was the stock of hay on the loft but I still don't understand how it could have started so quick like that." Vincent explained with a troubled expression.

Arthur hummed and frowned, something wasn't right here... While he didn't want to believe it, there was serious evidence to suggest that this wasn't an accident, though Arthur truly hoped that wasn't the case. He figured he'd keep that to himself for now until he heard what Abraham had found out or unless he had substantial evidence.

"Well, what matters is you made it right?" Arthur inquired.

" _And_ the horses." Vincent snickered as he leaned toward Arthur and gently bumping into him.

"And the horses." Arthur parroted with a chuckle before one of his hands came up to naturally rest in the middle of Vincent's back.

It somewhat surprised Arthur because he usually wasn't someone who tolerated physical affection, Dutch and Hosea were special, but otherwise, it wasn't often he let people touch him or that he would touch other people... But feeling part of Vincent's muscle structure from outside his shirt was almost too sweet to give up, unfortunately, fate had a way of interrupting him at the more inopportune times.

"Hey! Callahan!" One of the hands called from behind, making Arthur slightly jump and remove his hand from Vincent before both of them turned.

"What is it?" Arthur questioned.

"We're having issues herding some of the cattle, I think the fire has put 'em off. You mind comin' to help out?"

Arthur paused and glanced over to Vincent with a slightly apologetic expression, but the other was quick to grin at him and wave him off.

"Go on, I'll be fine... Why don't you just meet me back at the house when you're done for the day?" He offered, watching Arthur relax some and nod.

"Sounds good... I'll see you then." Arthur promise before sending a small smile to the other and departing from his side.

* * *

Arthur found that after spending so much time with Vincent, he was reluctant to leave his side. He made sure to visit him often over the last couple of days and it just kept confirming all of the feelings that Arthur still wasn't quite ready to face yet. Thankfully the cattle gave him plenty to focus on and the hours seemed to tick by far faster for Arthur's sake. It was probably around five by the time he was walking toward Vincent's house, and he found that he was actually concerned with looking presentable. He knew this wasn't seriously a _date_ but... Arthur reached up and slicked his hair back the closer he got and took a breath before sauntering to the front door and knocking firmly.

He waited patiently until he could hear someone walking toward the door and he was quick to straighten up just in case it was Abraham but he was relieved to see that it was Vincent... And he still looked stunning, even if he was wearing a sling.

"Hey. I was wonderin' where you were." Vincent mused in good humor.

"Blame your cattle." Arthur chuckled in response, though he was still worried about the other's health. "You sure you wanna go to a bar? We can drink here ya know." He mentioned.

"Actually we can't... I drank the rest of that whiskey over the last couple days." Vincent explained with a nervous grin.

"Ah, I see." Arthur snickered in understanding. "Well, I suppose we shouldn't waste any more time."

Arthur then nodded to Vincent to follow him before they walked back out to the path and Arthur reached into his mouth to whistle for The Admiral. It took a minute or so but his hooves could be heard thundering toward him until he appeared at Arthur's side, though Vincent seemed a bit nervous.

"He looks a lot taller than he did before..." He joked.

"You wanna take your horse?" Arthur offered, but Vincent quickly shook his head.

"No-no... I got this." He stated confidently before taking a breath and stepping up to The Admiral's side.

He took a moment to hype himself up but Vincent's good hand came out to grab the horn of the saddle while the other remained in the sling, once he managed to get his boot in the stirrup, Vincent somehow pulled himself up even though Arthur remained closed just in case he needed a boost, though he was impressed that just four days after the fire, Vincent was able to hoist himself into a saddle.

"See?" He panted, though looked incredibly proud of himself before he scooted back so that Arthur could climb up.

"You surprise me more and more every day, Taylor." Arthur chortled before mirroring Vincent's actions and seating himself atop The Admiral.

Arthur made sure to take it slow for Vincent's sake, they weren't in a huge hurry and the bar they were going to was only a short ride from the property. Arthur was relieved that only after about five or so minutes on his horse that the bar appeared in the distance and Vincent was sure to point it out. He pulled up and made sure to offer a hand out to Vincent to which the other obliged in, though as soon as he was down, Vincent slipped the sling off.

"You sure that's a good idea?" Arthur asked.

"Yeah, I need to get some pressure off my elbow and I need to lay my arm out... I'll put it back on before we ride back." Vincent explained as he carefully put the fabric into The Admiral's saddlebag.

When they walked into the bar, Arthur looked around to see that there were a few patrons already enjoying fine spirits and conversation, but it seemed like they had arrived early enough before the main rush showed up. It seemed like a decent place to get a drink at least.

"Vincent my boy!" The bartender greeted happily as they walked inside.

"Hey there, Uncle." Vincent greeted with a grin.

"I heard about the fire from your pa, I'm so glad you're alright." He mentioned as he briefly came from around the counter to pat Vincent's uninjured shoulder.

"Well, I wouldn't be here if it weren't for this man here. Arthur this is my Uncle, Jackson, Uncle this is Arthur." Vincent introduced, Arthur nodded and tried to contain his nerves about being put on such a pedestal, he just did what was right, he didn't need special treatment.

"Is that so..? Well, both your drinks are on the house tonight, sit anywhere you want." Jackson mentioned, and even though Arthur didn't like the special treatment he would never reject free alcohol.

"Thank you, sir." Arthur said before nodding and walking with Vincent to a more secluded part of the bar and sitting at a table. "This place is nice, I see why you wanted to come here now, why don't you come here all the time?" He inquired curiously as he recalled that he actually met Vincent at a different establishment.

"I mean I like it here, but I like to go to places where my movements don't feel so... Recorded. Family you know?" Vincent asked, and Arthur arched his brows since he knew _exactly_ what the other was feeling in a way.

"Actually, yeah..." He admitted.

They were given beers to start and Vincent was sure to order whiskey after that and Arthur ordered bourbon. Like usual they talked and laughed, and as the minutes became hours, their chairs slowly began to scoot closer to one another. If anything, this really did feel like a date in some ways, not that Arthur had been on a lot of those, but he definitely would have ranked this one in his top three.

Thankfully there was a clock positioned on the wall so Arthur was able to keep track of how long they were wasting away here, though currently, it was about eight. Arthur was feeling rather loose and warm while Vincent was at least experiencing some pain relief. However as he looked up, all positivity drained from his face and he paled, making Arthur frown slightly.

"What?"

"... Don't look now, but a couple of vermin just scurried through the door." Vincent mumbled underneath his breath and actually put his head down a bit to avoid being seen, but it was too late.

"My, oh my, is that little Vincent Taylor over there?" An unfamiliar voice crooned, and already Arthur could feel the hair standing on the back of his neck from the other's attitude to which he didn't hesitate in turning around to face the obvious foe. "Oh, and it looks like he's got one of the dogs from the ranch with him to protect him this time."

Narrowing his eyes, Arthur noted three assailants and the obvious ring leader of the group looked maybe five years younger than himself though he seemed physically superior compared to Vincent, who was already a small man. Arthur didn't like where this was going, especially with Vincent injured.

"I advise you watch your manners, this doesn't seem to be a place that serves animals." Arthur replied smoothly.

"Sorry, _dog_. We're not concerned with you." The other dismissed as he walked forward, toward Vincent.

However, as the other went to pass Arthur to get to Vincent, he was quick to stand and step between the assailant and Vincent who just glared forward at the other. The intensity of the room sky-rocketed and all movement ceased as Arthur's eyes scanned over each opponent carefully. The man before him was about the same height as himself, black hair and hazel eyes, a scar on his left cheek. He seemed formidable upfront but Arthur could see the lack of real true experience, he was still younger after all.

"Just leave us alone, Myles." Vincent growled as Arthur's stern expression dared the other to keep walking.

"You heard the man... Myles. I'll remember that name." He mused as his eyes taunted the other.

"You threatenin' me, friend? My business is with that scrawny little pole-smoker." Myles insinuated with a rather smug smirk.

Arthur wasn't sure what had exactly come over him, but at the slur that was thrown at Vincent, Arthur suddenly lunged forward and took hold of the other's neck and slammed him down onto the table before he even had time to react and taking him off his feet. Shocking Vincent enough for him to jump up.

"Whoa! Whoa!" He quickly intervened. "A-Arthur let's just go." He then pleaded softly as he noted the two others followed behind Myles getting ready to defend against Arthur's attack despite the initial surprise.

Even though Arthur slightly glared at Vincent since he was rather unkeen with allowing this asshole to not only throw such an insult but such an accusation at Vincent in public no less... However, he took a breath and released the other man's throat and backed away. Vincent breathed a sigh of relief and nodded as he noted that the patrons in the bar were staring and he knew now was the time to get lost since he couldn't fight back and cover Arthur... But as they went to walk away, Myles lunged forward and roughly grabbing Vincent's injured arm.

"You're not goin' anywhere!"

The shorter of the two actually collapsed onto his knees as he released a feral cry of pain, even Myles seemed shocked but that didn't stop Arthur from slamming a fist into the other man's face to free Vincent's arm from his hand and _t_ _hat_ was when the brawl started. Vincent barely had time to scramble out of the way before Arthur threw one of Myles' lackey's over a table. He had no clue that Arthur was so... Powerful? However, when Myles pulled out a knife from behind Arthur, Vincent gasped harshly.

"A-Arthur watch out!"

Suddenly the sound of a shotgun shell cocking into place cut through the scuffle and all movement stopped... Vincent's Uncle had pulled a pump-action from behind the counter and was aiming it at Myles, occasionally switching it to his followers.

"Oh no, you don't... Not in my bar." Jackson snarled and narrowed his eyes slightly at Arthur's attackers coolly.

Thankfully, Arthur had only suffered a few punches to his ribs and avoided any to his face but he still rubbed at his side a bite sorely once it appeared that he was out of danger. Myles and his posse gathered themselves up before glaring at Jackson.

"... We'll remember this, old man." He growled before they walked out of the bar and Jackson finally lowered his gun.

"You two alright?" He finally asked, watching as the other customers in the bar slowly began going back to their business.

"I-I'm fine, I'm more worried about Arthur." Vincent groaned as he held his arm in his free hand.

"No, I'm the one whose fine... We should get back and look at your arm." Arthur replied, openly worried about the other as he approached and frowned. "I-I'm sorry that I let him get that close to you." he mumbled.

"Don't be, my sleeve is covering my arm, I'd wanna believe that he wouldn't have grabbed me like that if he'd known but... Thank you, Arthur." Vincent replied with a smile. "Although... I think I'm ready to get outta here, you ready to go?" He asked, watching Arthur nod.

When they walked outside, Arthur made sure to be vigilant and was certain they weren't going to be followed back as he waited for Vincent to put his sling back on. Arthur could feel the other leaning against him on the ride back and still felt guilty. Hearing that cry of pain made a cold wave run through Arthur's body and he just lost it. When they finally pulled through the gate, an idea went through Vincent's mind and he spoke.

"Hey... Since our date was cut short, you think you can do somethin' for me?" He inquired as they climbed off The Admiral.

"Sure, what is it?" Arthur asked.

"... You think you can run into town and buy some liquor? Then meet me back here?"

Arthur tilted his head slightly but he wasn't about to lie and say he was done spending time with the other. Even though he was confused, Arthur nodded and climbed back onto the Admiral before kicking his way back toward town. Thankfully the general store he went to was still open and he got a few bottles, one to replace Abraham's whiskey, one for himself, and one for Vincent before making his way back toward the property.

It was pitch back outside when he returned and for a moment Arthur wondered if the other had gone to bed, but in the corner of his eye he saw something moving and when he glanced up he gasped softly as he saw Vincent waving at him from the roof.

"C'mon Arthur!" He laughed.

"H-How did... The hell you doin' up there?" Arthur asked in awe.

"Ask questions later Arthur! There's a ladder by your room!" Vincent replied.

Arthur blinked but smirked and shook his head before jogging around the side of the house and finding the ladder in question. He wasted no time in climbing up the pegs before balancing himself carefully on the slanted roof and making his way around where Vincent was sitting. It seemed like while he was gone, the other had fetched the blanket from his bed and had been waiting here for Arthur... Which was inherently adorable.

"Was wonderin' what was takin' you." Vincent laughed before Arthur plopped next to him and caught his breath briefly.

"I was wonderin' how the hell you got up here." Arthur replied with a chuckle.

"I ain't crippled, Arthur.' Vincent snorted.

"Yeah but... How's your arm?" He asked with a hint of worry as he glanced over to the affected limb.

"It's alright Arthur... Thankfully he just grabbed my forearm, it woulda been worse if he had grabbed my shoulder." Vincent replied, despite Arthur shaking his head.

"I'm still sorry." He sighed.

"Arthur it's okay." Vincent giggled softly before passing some of the blanket over for the chilly October night. "Here."

"Sure but why're we up here?" Arthur asked out of curiosity as he reached into his satchel to pull out the alcohol he had brought back as both of them got comfortable beneath the thick red blanket.

"It's a beautiful night... Figured we could look for constellations." Vincent replied as he looked over to Arthur with a small nervous smile. "Especially since we got interrupted so rudely."

"Speakin' of which, who was that guy?" Arthur asked curiously.

"Oh, Myles Black..? That's a long and... Complicated story." Vincent sighed, opting to leave it at that.

"I understand." Arthur replied simply and nodded before looking down to the other and taking a breath as he felt Vincent leaning against him and begin to open his bottle.

For a few minutes, the two sat in silence as Arthur opened his bottle of bourbon as well, though eventually, Vincent had to give up and hand his bottle over so that Arthur could open it for him due to the weakness in his hand... It was only slightly cute, and Arthur did his best to remain stoic as he passed the bottle back.

"... I know you don't like it but... Thanks again, Arthur. Not just for takin' care of those pricks at the bar but... For savin' my life. Really." Vincent then said before picking himself up a bit so he could look more fully at Arthur, who found himself mesmerized by those silver globes of Vincent's, however, the other averted his gaze as he looked toward the barn with a somber expression. "You know... My father hasn't called me Vince since I was probably twelve... Shit before the barn fire... I woulda almost said he would have preferred my brother made it and I died with my mother." he admitted.

"Really?" Arthur asked with surprise and slight abhorrence at the suggestion. "You're kiddin'."

"Nope." Vincent chuckled, albeit sadly. "I mean I know he loves me, it ain't that... I just... He and I are a lot different and don't see eye to eye on a lot of things. My brother was just... The man my pa always wanted me to be." He sighed.

"... The picture in your drawer?" Arthur inquired, watching Vincent nod.

"Yeah... My brother Isaac." He mumbled.

**_BA-BUMP._ **

Arthur actually went pale this time as he stared dumbfounded at Vincent. However as the other looked over, he seemed a bit concerned as his brows arched.

"Whoa there, you okay Arthur? You look real pale-"

"W-What did you just say?" Arthur interrupted, gulping harshly and watching Vincent tilt his head in confusion.

"Um... My brother, his name was Isaac. Why?" He asked, watching the realization wash over Arthur, and he eventually chuckled in both exasperation and awe.

"... Nothin' I-... I just keep bein' reminded how much I like you." Arthur suddenly confessed before meeting Vincent's eyes again, watching complete shock take over Vincent's face and he blushed nothing but scarlet.

"... I-... I like you too." He muttered, now realizing how close he and Arthur were.

Arthur's heart was racing... He knew that there was a connection between the two of them, but he never would have guessed that it ran this deep. Reaching up, Arthur paused for a moment but ran his hand through Vincent's hair once more as the other stared at him completely stunned, though he relaxed as he felt Arthur's hand against his scalp and took a breath to calm himself as well.

However, Arthur then smirked and winked before suddenly laying down on his back, he was propped up a bit from the slanted roof and he folded his arms behind his head comfortably as he watched Vincent process what had just happened and he huffed slightly.

"You don't play fair." He said.

"I know..." Arthur chuckled quietly before Vincent mirrored his actions and got comfortable next to him, however, he was quick to cuddle up to Arthur comfortably.

While he knew it was a bad idea, Arthur couldn't help himself... Gulping harshly, one of his arms slowly came down and wrapped around Vincent as they stared upwards at the sky, who replied by smiling and adjusting his position so that his head was actually leaning against Arthur's chest. It was the most relaxed and... Honestly happy, that Arthur had felt in a _long_ time... And even though he wasn't sure what it was that guided him, he spoke.

"... I had a son once... His name was Isaac." Arthur admitted.

"... Had?" Vincent asked obviously hesitantly, and even though the story used to break Arthur he just took a breath and nodded.

"Yeah... Lost him to some thugs while I wasn't around." He explained briefly, watching Vincent sit back up a bit and looked down at Arthur with a look of disbelief and sympathy.

"I-I'm so sorry, Arthur. I had no idea." He said, though Arthur quickly shook his head in response.

"Don't be... That led me to be here, didn't it?" He asked, arching a brow up at Vincent with a weak smile before the other blushed yet again for the second time in such a short period of time.

Vincent almost seemed startled at Arthur's answer if not completely melted by it, and without warning the other began slowly leaning down... And for just a moment Arthur thought Vincent was going to kiss him... But just as the other got within range he smirked.

"... I win." He whispered as Arthur desperately tried to rein in the urge to just meet the other halfway and fucking kiss him, but his words caught him a little off guard.

Arthur was going to ask what the other had meant when he slowly began pulling something out from underneath the blanket and when Arthur realized that he other had somehow got hold of his journal, he rolled his eyes playfully and laughed before opening his eyes back up to meet the ones that felt just inches above his.

"... I guess you did." He mentioned before a small smirk slithered over his expression. "Guess It's my turn to get it back now." He mused before suddenly rolling over on top of Vincent, making the other gasp.

"No! No fair! I'm injured!" He laughed as he passed the book to his bandaged hand and held it as far above his head as he could once he was on his back.

Arthur chuckled as he reached up and managed to grab ahold of his journal without much issue since he was just a bigger man than Vincent in general, however as he was reaching up he realized just _how close_ they were now... For god sake, Arthur was laying on top of Vincent... Between his legs...

The other looked just as shocked as he did once they realized the rather precarious situation they had found themselves in. It was almost as if they were afraid to move, too worried about acknowledging what was going on... But eventually, Vincent slowly released the journal and he took a breath.

"I-I... Sorry." Arthur mumbled finally as he backed away from Vincent despite the other seeming a bit disappointed.

"It's alright." He replied, slowly sitting up as Arthur resumed sitting beside him and slipped his journal back into his satchel.

Only a slightly awkward silence consumed the air as they grabbed their bottles and went back to drink up the urge to give into... Whatever this was. It seemed almost idiotic now to pretend that there wasn't... _Something_ there.

"... It's not that I-..." Arthur muttered, hesitantly glancing over to Vincent who looked back over to him, however, Arthur could see that Vincent wasn't judging him, he seemed worried if anything. "... E-Even if we..." He trailed off again before finally releasing an exhausted chuckle. "Trust me... You don't want someone like me." He said calmly, the testosterone-fueled adrenaline finally dying down, though Vincent looked away, his expression unreadable.

"I... I thought that I had really messed up there." He admitted, confusing Arthur briefly who tilted his head before finally looking back over, the blush having returned to his visage. "... I thought that I had driven you away too." He said with a small but obvious sigh of relief, realizing that Arthur had felt the same way he did, though he soon chuckled softly too and shook his head. "Anyway, how would you know what I want?" He inquired before flashing a small smirk over at Arthur who's heart thumped uncomfortably in his chest at the slightly suggestive tone that Vincent was taking.

"Like I said... Trust me." Arthur sighed and frowned before looking away, though he could see Vincent frown in his peripheral. "I ain't the man you think I am." He stated seriously.

Vincent blinked, his brows arching briefly, and for a moment he averted his gaze as he was absorbed in deep thought before he slowly started to scoot toward Arthur, who turned toward him once more and took a breath to steady his nerves.

"... You ain't the man who accepted my drink at the bar?" Vincent questioned, seeing a slightly taken aback expression wash over the other's face. "... Or the man who broke _five_ difficult horses in one afternoon without _any_ specifics on payment..?" He asked once more, Arthur's heart continuing to pound in his chest. "... What about the one who saved my life?" He finally inquired, his tone barely above a whisper, forcing Arthur to really focus and listen to his words.

Arthur released a slow but shaky breath, using every ounce of his willpower to resist to do what every cell in his body _begged_ him to. Vincent was so close, it would require no effort at all to just lean in and kiss him. It felt like torture denying it like he was ripping himself apart on the inside. Why now did he feel such a force of gravity toward Vincent? Was it the fire..?

_Y-... You need to get outta here..._

Vincent could see the inner battle raging within Arthur, the mysterious aura that he always carried around was beginning to make real sense. Slowly reaching down, Vincent's injured hand carefully and gently gripped one of his own. Arthur gulped and looked down to see the half-bandaged hand intertwining his fingers with his.

"... If you really don't want this, I understand." Vincent finally sighed before nodding. "But... We ain't in a hurry." He then mentioned, briefly stunning Arthur.

It was true... They _weren't_ in a hurry. There was no telling when the gang would even start planning for the next real job, and while he wasn't fond of possibly having to lie to Vincent in the future, there was also no telling in what they'd even be doing, if he and Hosea could convince Dutch to have some sense, Vincent wouldn't even find out about it... And Arthur didn't think he could refuse this even if he wanted to.

Finally squeezing his hand one last time, Vincent took his hand away from Arthur before taking another drink silently and looking back up to the sky. He still smiled as he looked up to the stars, and as Arthur watched him his heart only continued to swell.

There was only one way to tell if he really wanted this.

Reaching forward, Arthur's hand gently caught the other's chin briefly before turning Vincent's head toward him and leaning in, connecting their lips gently as his eyes fluttered shut. Vincent gasped subtly but relaxed immediately into the gesture as his mirrored Arthur.

Even though the act only lasted for a few moments, when Arthur pulled back, he couldn't deny how right it felt. He almost felt breathless but re-energized at the same time. It was as if something had flowed through both of them simultaneously and it seemed that Vincent had felt the same way because he gawked up at Arthur, completely shocked with the turn of events, but after what felt like eons... A smirk slowly etched its way onto Arthur's lips.

"... You've been waitin' for that all night, haven't you?" He inquired quietly against the other's lips.

"You're the devil." Vincent chuckled back, earning a more rich and genuine laugh from Arthur as he pulled away and took a breath as he processed what was happening here.

_You have to let John go._

He remembered Hosea saying that very clearly to him one night when he was getting loaded with whiskey by the campfire and feeling sorry for himself. It was a month or so after John had disappeared and Arthur was still trying to find the will to pick himself back up.

_I can't watch what happened to me happen to you, after Bessie died, I refuse. Get your ass up and work._

Arthur's eyes fluttered shut one last time as he recalled it was that kick in the pants he needed to realize he was being an idiot letting John control him in the worst way possible, and he wasn't even there to see his handy work.

"I... I can't promise that..." Arthur muttered eventually, trying to figure out how to explain himself, he wanted to be as honest as he could, with himself _and_ with Vincent. "... My situation is... It's on borrowed time, I dunno how long I'll be here and... I don't even know if I can give you what you want." He admitted with a small sigh.

"Well... It wouldn't be the first time I've been burned." he mused casually as he glanced over to his arm with a small smile, winking up at Arthur who chuckled in exasperation.

"Surely you could find someone your age." He deflected, watching Vincent roll his eyes in response.

"Now you're just looking for an excuse for this not to work." He mentioned, smirking at Arthur.

"... Cause I know you deserve better." He sighed, but his resolve was shattering and he could feel his resistance melting away.

"... Well, I couldn't say you didn't warn me." Vincent mused, meeting Arthur's eyes.

Goddamn, this guy... He knew just what to say to calm Arthur's building anxiety and reassure him with his stability. He was so confident and happy... It felt like it was bleeding over onto him. Arthur knew that he couldn't do this all at once, he still had things in his home life that he still had to deal with anyway.

"... Let's start with this." He finally said before laying back against the roof, and though Vincent was puzzled for a moment, when Arthur motioned for him to come closer, he blushed once again before smiling and resuming his place at Arthur's side and laying his head upon Arthur's chest and hearing his heart thumping quickly in his chest.

Arthur's arm slithered back around Vincent, though this time it coasted a bit lower, feeling a more detailed expanse of the other's back and stopping once it rested upon the smaller man's waist near his hip... It was a delightful feeling against the other's skin as well, despite it being subtle, feeling Arthur's hand wander his body even if it were just for a minute, it was enough for Vincent to have to calm his over-active imagination.

"... Where did you learn how to fight like that?" Vincent questioned in the calm silence that followed, and Arthur could already feel a smile spreading on his face.

He could really get used to this... Arthur felt safe with Vincent.

> You say you're scared of where we are right now  
> You recognize the road we're going down  
> From the last time  
> But, honey, I ain't that guy
> 
> I bet he had you hanging on a string  
> And made you think it was the real thing  
> But that ain't fair to you  
> And it sure ain't fair to me
> 
> Who told you it was complicated  
> Who tricked your heart and left you lonely baby  
> Ain't supposed to keep you up all night  
> Put tears in your eyes  
> So who,  
> Who lied about love to you
> 
> They say it's patient, it's honest and kind  
> From what I've heard it looks a whole lot like  
> You and me right now  
> So close your eyes and let me lay you down
> 
> Who told you it was complicated  
> Who tricked your heart and left you lonely baby  
> Ain't supposed to keep you up all night  
> Put tears in your eyes  
> So who,  
> Who lied about love to you
> 
> Who told you it was complicated  
> Who tricked your heart and left you lonely baby  
> Ain't supposed to keep you up all night  
> Put tears in your eyes  
> So who,  
> Who lied about love to who
> 
>   
> Yeah, who lied about love to you
> 
> Mmm, yeah he lied, he lied
> 
> source: [Lied about Love by Larry Fleet](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SQqiClJULQ)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm in love with these two!!! It took me a minute to really figure out what I wanted to do with them but I think I finally have a path paved out in my head. I hope everyone is enjoying the development!  
> -Eros


	9. The Wolf in the Woods

_November 14th, 1895_

_Been a few weeks since the barn fire, Vincent's arm is healing nicely, the doctor still suggests him to take it easy on his shoulder and his hand but his arm is starting to look brand new again. He is still sore from time to time if he overworks it but that's what I'm there for..._

_I still can't believe I kissed him... It felt... New, despite how foolish it sounds because it was new. It felt like something that I_ ~~ _want_~~ _need more of, it's like my body is craving it. His lips were so soft... It took my breath away._

_I've managed to keep myself off of him for the most part, every now and again I feel myself weaken and I can't help but seeking out some kind of affection from him but... Until I can finally figure things out with Abigail, it wouldn't feel right indulging myself in him, even if it's what he wants._

_I'm not the man he thinks I am... But I want to be as close to it as I can before I submit to my urges._

Taking a long breath as Arthur composed his mind, his pencil stopped and he bit his tongue. Even writing his feelings down made him feel guilty and remorseful... He had been home in camp the last few days and it was almost painful to be away from Vincent, and even though Arthur didn't like depending on people for his happiness, it had been so long since Arthur had found someone that could make him happy without even trying, and Vincent was _good_ at it. The one person he had ever trusted enough to do that had betrayed him and their family more than words could express... And it seemed like Arthur's defenses were finally beginning to weaken which terrified him.

He had been especially occupied that day and spent more time in his tent than normal. He should have known it would be noticed but like usual when he was lost in his head, time blurred together and before he knew it... He had missed dinner, though if he was being truthful he wasn't very hungry.

_Be a goddamn man!_

Arthur actually gasped softly as he dropped his pencil and gulped. He hadn't heard that voice in...

_Don't you cry! I swear to god boy if you start cryin'..._

Taking a slow and deep inhale, Arthur reached off his cot and took his pencil back into his hand before closing his journal and reaching up to rub his head. His father was a bastard... There was no doubt in that.

_Be a goddamn man!_

He had a point though...

Sighing, Arthur quickly opened his journal back up and flipped the page from the one he was currently working on and quickly began to doodle. Just to stop thinking about that fucker, though he noticed that as the picture began to form... It was turning into Jack. He had grown so much in just six months, it was bittersweet to watch but Arthur often drew the drooling bubbly baby, mainly to have memories of it.

There were no cameras worth paying for, Arthur's drawings would hold up with time as long as he took care of them and he made sure to. Unable to stop the small smile that began to make its way onto his face as he continued, he looked down at Jack's smiling face as a half an hour passed. Once he had finished shading it, he quickly put the date at the bottom and along with it: _six months._

It was like his little private baby book for Jack while also detailing the worst of his sins...

* * *

Working her arms to the bone, Abigail scrubbed furiously with the washtub at the nearest river which was currently about a five-minute walk from their current camp. With the help of Miss Grimshaw, she had made a little harness for Jack as well so she was able to take him with her wherever she went and she was able to have free use of her hands, but currently, he was rolling around carelessly on a blanket she had laid out for him while she did the laundry.

She already had to stop on multiple occasions to keep him from rolling off the blanket and onto the dirty forest floor and Abigail soon regretted not bringing some kind of barrier for her overly zealous baby this morning. She too had things on her mind...

Arthur had been... Distant lately, and not his usual brooding distance that he sported as a front, this felt... Different, and not in a good way. He hadn't been treating her any different when they were alone, which hadn't been a lot lately, but she could see a sort of hollowness behind his eyes that often worried her. Whenever she brought it up he was quick to quell her nerves but... Abigail wasn't stupid.

Glancing over, Abigail gasped and quickly lunged out just as Jack nearly got a face full of dirt and she sighed softly in exasperation when she heard Jack grunt in frustration, realizing that he was _trying_ to get off the blanket.

"You really are a pain in my behind today." She grumbled to no one in particular before haphazardly drying her hands on her dress and picking him up into her arms.

Jack's hair had been growing like grass, it was thick and brunette, and in Abigail's personal opinion he was looking more and more like Arthur every day. He was becoming a spitting image of him and while Abigail originally wanted a girl to take after her, there was no denying that she was in love with her little baby boy. In the end, she had just told herself that if Arthur decided to give them up it was his loss, but it was easy to say that.

Gently rocking Jack to try and calm him in her arms, she glanced up and looked around curiously. However, as her focus was taken off Jack and put into the woods... An eerie silence filled the air. Abigail wasn't someone to get creeped out by a lot of things, she was a no-nonsense kind of gal and she didn't take for anyone trying to intimidate her but there was a feeling that something wasn't right... Like someone was watching her.

Gulping, Abigail quickly turned around and looked in the direction of their camp, wondering if someone was trying to play some kind of joke on her but she already knew that was false before she had even turned. There didn't seem to be anyone around and yet...

Humming quietly before she looked back toward the river, she had almost calmed down when it, or rather _he_ , finally caught her eye...

There was someone across the river... In a mask... Pointing a rifle toward her and her son.

Gasping as Abigail stood there, completely stunned and wondering if she was really seeing what she was, she stood rigid and in complete terror until she watched the supposed man slide a bullet into the chamber and load the gun.

"A-... Arthur..." She barely squeaked, but as she watched the gunman slowly beginning to focus his aim at her, tears began to fill her eyes.

"ARTHUR!"

**_BANG._ **

* * *

Arthur had already begun sprinting toward the river before he had even heard the bullet explode from the gun once he heard Abigail's cry, but once he did, his heart sank into his stomach and he tore through the trees, not waiting for anyone to follow behind him and back him up, he could hear Jack wailing in the distance.

"Arthur! Arthur!" Abigail cried to his left.

"Abigail!" Arthur yelled. "I'm comin'! Where are you!"

"O-Over here!" She replied.

It took Arthur not longer than a few seconds to come upon her, he was panting but seeing that she and Jack seemed to be perfectly fine he took a moment to gather his composure before one hand came out to rest on Abigail's shoulder and the other gently cradling the back of Jack's head carefully, the relief in his eyes beyond words, but Abigail was quick to walk into his arms and did her best to reel in her tears, it wasn't long after that that Dutch, Hosea, Bill, and Javier had appeared from the trees, guns ready.

"What happened!?" Dutch quickly barked.

Arthur didn't hesitate to take Abigail in his arms and pull her close, he could feel her form shaking and she was holding Jack for dear life who whimpered and clung to his mother as well. The gunshot must have spooked him too and Arthur just took a moment to rest his head upon hers as he hugged her and thanked God that she was safe.

"Over here." Hosea replied calmly about fifteen feet away from Abigail behind her.

Hosea was standing over a rather large adult cougar, a bullet hole in its neck. Abigail hesitantly pulled herself away from Arthur who also looked over.

"I-... I didn't even know it was there." She admitted in slight awe.

"What happened, darlin'?" Arthur inquired gently as he looked down to her.

"I-I... I was doin' laundry like always and... I dunno I got the willies like someone was watchin' me. Suddenly I looked across the river and I-... I saw a man." She admitted, watching Arthur's eyes widen with shock and anger.

"What kind of man?" Dutch inquired curiously as he furrowed his brows and approached the couple.

"I don't know, he seemed to be wearin' some kind of mask, I couldn't see what he looked like... B-But he was aiming a gun at me!" She explained, obviously shaken to her core. "That's when I started callin' for you... I thought I was a goner when I heard him pull the trigger." She muttered before looking down at Jack and gently wiping his tears away as he began to calm with Arthur and the others at their side.

"You sure you didn't see anything else?" Hosea inquired curiously as he knelt by the dead animal. "Seems weird for a stranger in a mask to save you from a cougar and disappear into thin air."

"I'm sorry but I was more concerned about shielding my son from a bullet." She sneered slightly, watching Hosea quickly put his hands up in surrender before standing up.

"Whoever it was... We owe them a thank you." He then mentioned.

Abigail blinked but hesitantly walked forward with Arthur at her side to get a better look at the cougar. Had it really been stalking her..? Was this stranger actually pointing his gun at the cougar and not her..?

"Did you see the direction he went, Abigail?" Dutch asked as he looked toward the opposite side of the river, there was no man there anymore.

"N-No... I closed my eyes." She admitted a bit shamefully as a blush came to her cheeks, but Arthur was quick to tighten his hold around her.

"You did good." He whispered to her, feeling her relax slightly in his arms.

"I acted like a child." She huffed softly.

"You were thinkin' about Jack." he replied and reached up to run a hand through her hair gently and she soon finally took a breath to calm her nerves.

"From now on, let's stick to pairs if you go in the woods, you leave _armed_. Even if that stranger saved Abigail from the cougar, what if he hadn't..?" Dutch inquired, seeing Abigail gulp softy and hug Jack closer once more.

"We got a free pelt out of it at least." Javier mentioned shrugging as he knelt beside the cat. "A beauty too."

"You wanna skin this thing, Arthur? You can bring the pelt to that ranch town you go to and sell it." Hosea offered and Arthur nodded but as he looked over to Abigail he knew he wouldn't be heading in until tomorrow despite how much he wanted to see Vincent, Abigail was visibly shaken up.

"Sure, you fellas want to take Miss Roberts back? I think she's had enough laundry for the day." He then stated as he reached over and gently tucked some hair behind her ear.

"I'll stay with you." Hosea offered since Dutch had just ordered the pair rule.

Javier carried the laundry for Abigail while Dutch led them back to camp, Arthur got to work skinning the cougar that the apparent stranger had saved Abigail from while Hosea scanned the waterline for any signs of the intruder. It still rubbed him the wrong way despite the best possible outcome for the situation but no matter how long he stared, there was no movement other than the occasional bird.

Though the longer Arthur cut into the animal, the tenser the air became and his knife eventually paused.

"... Is there somethin' you wanna say?" He asked, though his words were wary and hesitant.

"Why would you think that?" Hosea asked casually as Arthur continued slicing his way through the layer of skin.

"I dunno... You just been quiet."

"So have you. This is the first time I've seen you today." Hosea mused, watching Arthur pause briefly again but continue smoothly.

"I guess so." He mumbled.

"Something on your mind?" Hosea inquired curiously more than anything, he always had a way of putting Arthur to ease, he never grilled Arthur and he never made him feel judged, but right now with everything going through his mind, nothing made him feel safe except the one man he had been denying and for the first time in his life, there was nothing Arthur wanted more than to tell Hosea everything but he couldn't.

"... I-I..." He stammered as his knife stopped once again, though the casual expression on Hosea's face fell slightly at Arthur's shift in energy and he frowned.

Hosea had been one of the closest people in his life, even after Bessie had died he never stopped being one of them and he had enough common decency to kick Arthur in the ass when he saw the cycle repeating itself. He and Dutch were the closest things to parents that Arthur ever had, though his relationship with Dutch was... Different now. He treasured his platonic and familial relationship with Hosea and knowing he would jeopardize that if he breathed a word of what he had done with Vincent it scared him to death.

"... Arthur." Hosea stated, frowning further when Arthur refused to look at him and continued skinning the downed animal in silence.

The elder of the two watched Arthur, he could read the fear, doubt, and worry in the younger man's eyes. Even though it took a lot for Hosea to become frightened, Arthur's eyes had done that on multiple occasions, and that included now. However, there was one crucial thing that Arthur had forgotten... Hosea had known Arthur longer than his own family, he had watched him grow up and knew things about Arthur that he knew the other would rather die than admit.

"... Is this about that blonde ranch hand?" He suddenly asked.

The shock was enough for Arthur's knife to slip and slice into his thumb, a quick and rather colorful curse erupted from Arthur's lips as he dropped the blade and held onto his hand while Hosea jumped slightly as well. He was quick to reach into his satchel and grab a bandage before yanking Arthur's hand over to him.

"You idiot." He scoffed.

"H-How did you... I-It's not even-"

"Until you pick an excuse I suggest you let me wrap this first." Hosea scoffed before he examined Arthur's thumb.

He was lucky, had it gone a bit deeper he'd need stitches though he'd make sure Susan would look at it as well. He bled like a stuck pig but once Hosea got the bandage on his hand Arthur was thankful to see that no blood leaked through and he sighed slightly in exasperation before plopping backward onto his rear.

"What the hell, Hosea?" he asked with a slightly pointed and annoyed look.

"Well, I can only assume I'm right if it made _you_ of all people slip up like that." Hosea replied, arching a brow expectantly at the closest thing he ever had to a son.

Arthur blinked and looked away, he hated to say that he didn't trust Hosea but... He heard Hosea talk of crazy people like him and if he knew that Arthur participated in things those unnatural men did, Arthur feared Hosea would never look at him the same again or worse.

"You gonna answer my question?" Hosea asked, watching Arthur flinch slightly.

"I-I don't know what you expect me to say... If I say no, you'll say I'm lyin' if I say yes, you'll lecture me on loyalty. It's a lose-lose for me." Arthur snorted in distaste, he was king of deflection.

Hosea blinked, his face somewhat unreadable for a moment, but suddenly, he lunged forward and grabbed the lobe of Arthur's ear and yanked _hard_.

"O-Ow! Hosea w-what the hell are you-!"

"I'll keep doin' it until you come clean." Hosea grumbled and continued pulling Arthur's ear further toward the floor, determined to make Arthur eat dirt if he was going to be _this_ stubborn to give him the answers he already knew.

"Goddammit old man! I ain't a kid anymore!" Arthur snarled slightly as he reached up and grabbed Hosea's wrist but that didn't stop the other from pulling his ear painfully.

"You're sure actin' like one..."

"Alright! Alright! Yes! Is that what you want to hear!?" Arthur relented, groaning when Hosea quickly released his ear.

He sat up quickly and grabbed it with his noninjured hand and glared iron daggers at Hosea who just looked at him deadpanned.

"Why?" He asked bluntly, and Arthur's expression drained of all aggression once again, he seemed to withdraw just as quickly as he did before, making Hosea finally sigh before standing up and brushing himself off. "Arthur... You've been my son for years now. I think I know you by now, it was pretty clear when John left." He confessed, watching all color now drain from Arthur's face.

... Hosea _knew?_

"I-... I don't know what you're-"

"Oh please, Arthur." Hosea snorted and shook his head. "Don't tell me you're in denial."

"S-Stop!" Arthur barked, his tone taking a painful turn and surprising Hosea again, when he looked at Arthur again he seemed to be holding his head in his hands. "I-... I can't... I-I'm not one of them." He muttered.

"One of who?" Hosea questioned, but once again, Arthur was unable to say it.

It finally seemed like Hosea would have mercy on Arthur, he sighed softly and knelt down in front of the younger man once more. He had his suspicions about Arthur for _years_ but he was never certain until John's disappearance, the way Arthur crashed, that wasn't just because he had lost a brother, he had lost a _lover_. While Hosea wasn't keen to hear the details of what happened there, when Dutch mentioned that he had seen Arthur hanging around with a blonde-haired boy around John's age...

"Listen, son." Hosea said a bit gentler than he had before, reaching out and catching Arthur's shoulders, seeming to gain Arthur's attention for the moment. "... The longer you deny this part of yourself, the more you'll lose who you are and the more miserable you'll become. Holding on to what's normal doesn't work for everyone." He said seriously, watching Arthur gawk at him.

"... Why are you sayin' this to me?" Arthur couldn't help but asked, watching Hosea then shrug before turning his attention back to the cougar and picking up where Arthur had left off considering that Arthur obviously had a lot on his mind.

"You seemed like you needed to hear it."

_Fuck._

* * *

It had been... He didn't even know how long since he had seen her.

Even though he had found the gang about two weeks ago, he hadn't had the gall to get this close yet... Though he was still a good distance off. Chocolate orbs honed in on the blue dress of the woman across the river, she had black hair that was tied up messily and he wanted to believe that it _was_ her. However, his view was still too far off...

Reaching slowly into his satchel, the wolf carefully put a pair of binoculars up to his eyes, the only thing that wasn't covered... He took a breath and focused back onto the girl and his heart pounded harshly in his chest when he saw none other than _her_ scrubbing laundry peacefully while a baby wiggled all over the place next to her on a blanket... It was them, there was no more doubt.

Taking a shaky breath, the wolf faltered for a moment and took the binoculars away to process what he had just seen... His child was healthy and happy.

Blinking, he put the binoculars back up to his face as he watched the girl quickly reach over and catch the baby and bring her up into his arms. She looked happy too... She looked... Like she was the perfect mother if he was being completely honest with himself.

Yet, the _slightest_ twitch of some foliage behind them caught the wolf's trained eyes, at first his instinct was to get out of here simply because he assumed it was another familiar face he wasn't ready to see but on closer inspection there seemed to be nothing there... That wasn't right. Frowning, he carefully zoomed in as best as he could with the contraption on his face when he gasped.

There was no time to think, only to act. There was no way he would get over there in time to save her, nearly tossing the binoculars aside, quick coordinated hands reached behind his back and pulled out his rifle that he kept on hand _specifically_ for dealing with aggressive predators, he began to look for the animal that he had sworn he saw.

For a moment, he frowned, wondering if it was his overactive imagination... He was certainly jumpier since venturing on his own and his mind had played tricks on him before... Sighing, he carefully moved the scope around until spotting the girl again, she was looking around, perhaps sensing his presence. It was best for him to get out of here, he was just to put his fun away when he saw it... _Again_.

There was no mistake this time, it was a cougar, and it was getting _dangerously_ close to the mother of his child. He could barely see it's head poking from the brush behind the girl... But once the wolf saw the eyes of the cougar, he swallowed harshly. It was stalking her... He didn't have much time, but as his focus faltered for just a split moment, his form went completely rigid.

The girl was looking _right at him_... She could see him.

She seemed completely shocked, as was he, for a second he had forgotten about the dangerous cat creeping toward her. He didn't have time to gawk at her, reaching into his satchel he pulled out a cartridge and slid it into the chamber as she stared at him, terror beginning to consume her features. Her lips seemed to move but he was too focused on making sure this shot counted.

"ARTHUR!"

Hearing her yell _his_ name... He couldn't take it anymore.

_**BANG.** _

Only when the cougar was downed did he breathe and lower his weapon. He could see her clutching onto the baby boy in her arms for dear life and slightly cowering, even from here he could hear the child screaming in fear, and even though his heart bled a little for them, he certainly _didn't_ regret putting that mountain lion down. He himself had even calmed for a moment until he saw none other than _him_ burst from the tree line toward the woman and the baby.

Gasping as he stared forward almost dumbfounded... It really was Arthur, and despite having been numbed for what felt like centuries, the wolf couldn't deny the unbearable twinge in his heart as he watched that man's hand come out and hold none other than Abigail and the child close as he delicately cradled the baby's head in his hand.

He was so caught up in reliving his own nightmares that he had forgotten how much danger he was really in, and without any more hesitation, he turned and began sprinting away.

Panting, the wolf ran quickly through the trees as if he had been there a thousand times before, he had planned this out so carefully and while he had seen his target, he wasn't expecting to have to _save_ her. What the hell was she doing down there!? How could they have let her come so close to death!? What would have happened if he hadn't shown up!?

Finally slowing to a stop, the wolf huffed and slowly regained his breath, blinking, his carob eyes quickly looked behind him just in case that the gang had come after him, he was relieved when he didn't hear any horses or yelling. They really must have loosened their game, it _did_ take him forever to find them after all, no newspaper outlets shared anything about their current deeds or whereabouts which only left him assuming that they had calmed in recent months.

It would make sense considering the baby... But he wasn't expecting to see _Arthur._

_**BA-BUMP.** _

Gulping, the wolf continued walking after he had caught his breath. Deep down, he knew that it was foolish not to expect _him_ after all. He was the Iron Fist and the right hand of the Van der Linde gang, why _wouldn't_ he show up?

He certainly wasn't expecting to have to take a shot... And watching her look _right at him_... With that fear in her eyes, it nearly broke him but he managed to save her life and that's all that mattered.

Eventually, the wolf reached up and pulled down the mask that was covering his nose and mouth before carefully taking off the hood that sported the ears and cranium of the mighty beast itself, but he may as well have been a wolf to the Van der Linde's, a predator when times were good and a scavenger when times were bad. He wasn't ready to reveal himself to them yet, but that cougar was _clearly_ stalking the girl and child.

He knew he couldn't wait too much longer with the information that he held, but considering how long it took him to find them, he knew it would take the others longer. He just needed time... And for once, it seemed like he had that to his disposal, he would just have to keep his correspondence with the mutual JT to make sure that his time didn't start to run out.

He wanted to see if they were worth saving anyway... But despite being a wolf, he knew that he couldn't watch them be taken out the way the government had planned on. It was plain undignified and even with the bitter feelings he had toward some of them, he never wished death upon them.

When he approached his loyal horse, he reached up and ran a hand over her nose gently, she had served him well throughout the years he had her, and she was still in her prime. He had considered getting another horse once he was on his own but... She was the one living creature he trusted... And she didn't mind serving a wolf.

"C'mon, Gypsy." He muttered as he climbed into his saddle, reaching up and running a hand through his loose raven locks.

He had originally cut it when he went on his journey, but it had grown almost back to where it had been originally when he left. If he was smart he'd do it again just to make sure that no one recognized him but... He had a weakness for his hair and he preferred it long. He had kept in hiding for almost a year anyway, cutting his hair wouldn't change a thing.

Kicking Gypsy's sides, the tired former outlaw reached up and ran a hand over his face some, this was really dangerous... That baby... He wanted to see them, and to say he didn't regret leaving would be a lie, but with everything that had happened while he was gone, perhaps it was the best that he had left given the information he had acquired on his travels.

There was no telling how they'd even react if they saw him again, perhaps they'd kill him on sight? Though that wouldn't exactly be a bad thing, he was _tired_. Being on his own had taught him a lot about himself and it wasn't always good. He killed people to survive and it became obvious that being in a group was much smarter than his old mentor had let on. Hell, he almost perished in the first two weeks after his initial disappearance it was only thanks to coming up on a farmstead that he was able to steal and kill one of their hogs.

He had a camp settled deep in the woods, despite his hardships since ditching his pack, he had also learned many life skills in a much shorter amount of time due to the pressure of staying alive. He didn't have much money when he left, so hunting and tracking became some of his greatest assets making his sense of direction _impeccable_.

But now... The only thing John Marston knew how to do was survive, he couldn't remember the last time he had lived.

> I don't want to be awake again  
> I spend my days with my head in my hands  
> If I go outside, I'll fall apart  
> I am mostly scared by passing time  
> The world, it seems, gets more unkind  
> Inevitable tragedies will soon be mine
> 
> I am looking for an easy place  
> To mask my thoughts behind my face  
> Oh, brown-baked column of victory  
> Maybe I should just pack up and run away again  
> Let you forget that you were once my friend  
> Then watch another, go on and do better without me
> 
> But I could not go away, not if I wanted to  
> I can hide from friends but I cannot hide from you  
> These chemical reactions are dividing me  
> Self-deprecating thoughts interrupting all the time  
> Emphasising all the traits that I wish weren't mine  
> They speak louder than everybody
> 
> Try to keep my eyes closed as my outlook isn't bright  
> Compulsively complaining when I haven't got the right  
> I hate the way that I think and act  
> I want to end reality but I feel hesitant  
> Optimistic that the future will be more concerned than the present  
> And so for today, I'll remain intact
> 
> I don't want to be awake again  
> I spend my days with my head in my hands  
> If I go outside, I'll fall apart
> 
> source: [It's OK, I Wouldn't Remember Me Either by Crywank](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7F-79cobr0)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!! Sorry if this chapter is a little confusing here and there nearing the end I promise it was intentional! I hope you're all still enjoying it!  
> -Eros


	10. Crime and Punishment

It wasn't until actually a couple of days later that Arthur traveled back to Vincent's ranch, and it couldn't have been soon enough. After the nonsense with the stranger who could have killed Abigail as well as Hosea forcing things out of him that he wasn't prepared for, he was ready to leave. In all honestly, Arthur should have known better, Hosea knew things about him that others would never guess... And it turned out Arthur wasn't nearly as careful as he thought he was, which only led him to wonder if there was anyone else that knew this... Side of him, besides Dutch of course.

With that thought, Arthur was more than happy to leave camp once he was certain that Abigail and Jack were safe and sound. She slept close to him that night, and Jack laid upon her chest peacefully. If he were a better man... It would be too sweet to give up.

However, those thoughts were quick to dissipate the closer and closer he got to Vincent's ranch, it almost embarrassed Arthur how excited he was deep down to see Vincent despite that they had been behaving themselves around each other after the kiss they shared weeks ago. It was surprising that Vincent never seemed impatient like how Arthur _felt_ on the inside, his hormones would surely be the death of him.

He was pleased that upon rolling through the gates that there were no fires and no signs of obvious chaos, and even though the ranch had been peaceful over the last few weeks, Arthur still couldn't get that blaze out of his mind upon realizing Vincent was inside... He was really worried, maybe even _scared_ to lose him.

_Don't tell me you're in denial._

Arthur pulled back on The Admiral to slow him into a trot as he swallowed harshly. How the hell was he in denial about something that wasn't true?

_My business is with that scrawny little pole-smoker._

He remembered becoming enraged with that statement hurled at Vincent in the bar... And surely part of it was due to the fact that Myles was insulting Vincent personally, but there was another part of Arthur that felt targeted by association and he would not allow anyone to look at him as one of those men, but why was he fighting it so hard..?

That was a stupid question... Men got killed for the kind of interactions he so giddily engaged in, and he was certain that, even though Abraham was grateful beyond expression to Arthur, he would have shot him if he had known that Arthur kissed his son, who was nearly ten years younger than Arthur himself. There was surely some kind of perversion there and as usual, Arthur became abhorred by his own being and nausea began to twinge his stomach as he pulled up to a hitching post near the farmhouse on Vincent's property.

"Hey! Arthur!"

Like clockwork... Vincent's cheerful voice calling out to him settled any worries and chased away all the self-loathing thoughts that had begun accumulating in his mind as he rode up. He physically had to stop the smile that wanted to form on his face but he couldn't keep it for long before the corners of his mouth quirked up in just the slightest as he climbed down from his horse and turned around to see Vincent's beaming expression as he walked toward him. Arthur wanted to deny it but... He _missed_ Vincent while he had been gone, normally he despised overly cheery people, but the other's aura always bled onto his.

"Hey. Sorry, I had some trouble back at home." Arthur greeted as Vincent stopped in front of him.

"I figured it was something important, no worries. I missed you." He chuckled, once again shocking Arthur with how... Open and confident he was without his feelings, he wasn't ashamed to admit things that Arthur would normally consider a weakness.

"I'm sure you did." Arthur replied smoothly but sent a small discreet wink toward the other who snorted with a small chortle of his own.

"Don't get too cocky, I was talking about your work ethic." He mused, though Arthur was quick to arch a brow and put on a confused expression.

"Of course, what did you think I meant?" He asked, and watching Vincent actually be caught off guard as a blush washed over his face like a flash flood, it nearly had Arthur turned on by itself, but he was quick to release a rich chortle before throwing his arm around Vincent's shoulders and pulling him close. "Gotcha."

"God, Arthur." Vincent groaned as he reached up and covered his mouth and cheeks briefly with one of his hands. "You're terrible." he then said before releasing a small laugh of his own and shaking his head. "You see the barn?"

Turning around, Arthur was pretty shocked to see that the foundation for a new barn was already being laid out and for only being gone a couple of days they had been working quickly. Grinning, Vincent began walking, effectively leading them toward the structure as Arthur's arm remained draped gently around his shoulder, it was a nice feeling, and even though he was originally blushing from embarrassment, now he was for a completely different reason.

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised, you probably have a big team workin' on this, don't ya?" Arthur asked as they got closer.

"Uh-huh, it took a while for pa to get a deal with the company who's helpin' us but I gotta admit they work hard and they don't take my workers for longer than necessary so the ranch doesn't suffer." Vincent replied with obvious relief.

Glancing over, Arthur could see that behind his persona, Vincent was tired. It didn't surprise Arthur considering he worked his ass off all day every day, he wasn't even sure how often the other got a day off besides the fire, and it wasn't like he was relaxing while he was healing from the excruciating burns. It pleased Arthur to no end that Vincent was no longer wearing a sling or bandages but he knew that the other was still recovering.

"You look exhausted." He commented, somewhat surprising Vincent again as he looked over but he was quick to smile a bit more nervously.

"You could tell..?"

"Mhm... Why don't you go in the house..? I'll take over wherever you left off when I got here." Arthur offered, watching a completely dumbfounded look come over Vincent's face.

"N-No I couldn't do that. I do this every day anyway, it won't be any more difficult than yesterday." He quickly said as Arthur began to lead them back toward the house at a leisurely pace.

"Which is _exactly_ why you should let me take over." Arthur argued playfully.

"Oh come on, I really couldn't let you take over for me, how would that look anyway?" Vincent scoffed as Arthur veered them around a little toward the side of the house where the storage room he used was.

"Like you needed a break." Arthur said simply, but with seriousness to his tone as they slowed to a stop.

Slowly, Arthur's arm came back up to remove itself from Vincent's shoulders, taking great care not to rub or jostle his injured one in any way before turning to face the other. He seemed to be playfully eyeing him up and down.

"What's gotten into you?" He inquired curiously.

Now it was Arthur's turn to stifle a blush as he tried to get his conversation with Hosea out of his head. He still wanted to deny it, he _still_ wanted to pretend that being with Vincent didn't feel... Perfect.

_The longer you deny this part of yourself, the more you'll lose who you are and the more miserable you'll become._

_Two people who love each other as pure and honest as anyone else I don't see anything unnatural about it._

Blinking as he recalled the eagle in the woods, Arthur bit his tongue as his eyes coasted down slowly over Vincent's neck. The other always had a pale complexion, and Arthur's hands wanted nothing more than to explore his pearly white unblemished skin and make his face contort in ways no other person had ever seen before... Quickly reeling back his hyperactive mind, Arthur ended up shrugging before looking around.

It only took a few seconds to determine that they were alone, he had chosen the backside of the house anyway for this specific reason before he reached up and rested one of his hands against the side of the house and leaning against it.

"Dunno... Maybe you finally rubbed off on me." Arthur replied, though his tone had taken a bit of a turn, and while Arthur wouldn't classify himself as a flirt, he had game back in the day and it seemed that Vincent caught his shift because a smirk didn't wait to slither over his features back at Arthur.

"I wish." He mused, watching Arthur actually grin back at him.

Even though Arthur often stressed about his relationship with Vincent, he _loved_ the flirting and the chemistry. Vincent always responded to him so well and fed off of his desire, which only made Arthur want him _more,_ but as his eyes glanced down to Vincent's healing arm he reached out and gently took the other's hand before pulling it up a bit so he could inspect the last of the healing burns on Vincent's wrist.

"How's your arm?" He asked unable to help himself.

"A lot better, you don't have to worry so much, Arthur." Vincent replied evenly, though it would be a lie if he said he didn't want to hold Arthur's hand.

"Pardon me, but I was the one who saw your body in the barn." Arthur snorted softly before nodding toward the door. "C'mon... For me."

"... You're not gonna let this go, huh?" Vincent questioned, watching Arthur shake his head with a confident smile before Vincent eventually groaned. "Alright, alright... I dunno what I'm gonna do with myself with all this time on my hands." He scoffed.

"You'll figure somethin' out... I can always come back and see you after I'm done." Arthur offered.

"That's a given." Vincent chuckled. "But... Actually, you wanna come with me inside real quick I have something I want to give you." He mentioned casually, sparking Arthur's interest.

"Sure, lead the way." He offered and took his body weight off the wall before Vincent nodded and walked the two of them into the storage room.

The chamber was dim, the window inside was facing the west, so it got most of its light during the evening. Vincent traversed the small room with ease, however as his hand reached out to grasp the knob, he suddenly spun around and leaned back against the door with a nervously optimistic expression that Arthur could only describe as adorable.

"I lied... I just wanted to get you alone in a dark room." He then confessed, shocking Arthur to his core with his boldness yet it was admirable to say the least.

Perhaps Vincent wasn't as patient as Arthur had given him credit for... But that wasn't necessarily a bad thing, he had kept himself at an arm's length for long enough now. Arthur's stunned expression was soon morphed into a smirk as his hand came up to rest on the door beside Vincent's head as he leaned forward just a bit. Arthur couldn't keep resisting this... It just felt too good for him to stop.

"... You know, it's not right to lie. Maybe I should punish you." He mused, watching Vincent's mouth actually fall open even if just a bit.

He certainly wasn't expecting that, it wasn't like Arthur to be so forward and for a moment Vincent had worried he was pushing it too far with what he had said... So knowing that Arthur was responding so well, his heart fluttered and he suddenly felt ten times smaller than the frighteningly charming man that _towered_ over him.

"... Maybe you should." He just managed to say above a whisper as he bit his lip with anticipation.

Goddamn... Arthur had never wanted to rip someone's clothes off more than he did _at that moment_... But a wise man had once said to him that only good boys got rewards... Vincent was supposed to be being punished, and Arthur knew just how to do it.

Blinking, the shift in Arthur's eyes was visible as he finally began to allow his restrictions to fall, leaning forward and planting a soft kiss upon Vincent's lips. It felt like fireworks were erupting deep within his soul and butterflies flourishing in his gut. He reminded himself that this was just a cover to get Vincent to let his guard down, but he couldn't stop himself from deepening the kiss and stepping closer as the urge to let go _desperately_ tried to take over.

Soon, Arthur's tongue was prodding Vincent's mouth asking permission for entrance and the other replied by parting his lips and inviting Arthur inside. Releasing a small sigh, Vincent's hands came up to rest upon Arthur's shoulders, pulling him a bit closer at feeling the sensation, Arthur knew that he had Vincent in the palm of his hand, but he took his time, savoring the act with the other and slowly allowing his arm to fall down from the wall while the other reached out and rest upon Vincent's hip.

Without indication, Arthur's hands dipped lower to actually cup Vincent's ass before suddenly hoisting him into the air and holding him up against the wall to effectively wrap his Vincent's legs around his waist. The other gasped harshly and flinched in surprise as his hands came out to quickly wrap around Arthur's neck to steady himself. Once he realized that Arthur was holding him up in the air, he stared forward at the other in complete and utter shock, his face plastered with crimson as he panted slightly to catch his breath.

There was a moment of silence as the two of them realized they had just crossed a line that could no longer be uncrossed... But Vincent could feel a rather specific _prodding_ down beneath his legs and knew it was Arthur's cock beginning to stiffen in his trousers from anticipation, he quickly pulled Arthur's head back toward him and crashed their lips together more intensely than ever before. He _wanted_ this and he wanted Arthur to know it.

Growling softly, Arthur's grasp on Vincent's ass tightened as he held the other up, and he was thankful that his hands were full simply because he knew he would already have started undressing Vincent if they hadn't been. While Arthur was excited to fuck him, he didn't want it like this, a rushed sloppy fuck in the storage room... But he was more than happy to entertain this for now.

One of Vincent's hands ran up the back of Arthur's head and delving into his thick brunette locks and grabbing a small fistful of it while the other explored the expanse of Arthur's back. It had been a long time since Arthur had been able to really indulge in someone's body like this. Abigail was a beautiful woman there was no doubt in that, but Vincent... As a man, he was a prime fucking specimen. He was petite but not scrawny, short but not stunted, open with his feelings but not overbearing... In all honesty, he was just the kind of man that Arthur wanted and the longer he kissed him the further that he could feel himself sinking into Vincent as a person.

He was just so beautiful... Inside and out.

Pulling back briefly, Arthur huffed softly and caught his breath as Vincent panted quietly in time with him. He continued to remind himself of his true intentions but that didn't mean he couldn't indulge a little longer, besides the longer he toyed with Vincent, the crueler his punishment would be and that was exactly what he wanted. Without further hesitation, Arthur leaned down a bit and pressed his lips against the other's neck, slightly surprising him though Arthur could feel him shudder a bit in enjoyment.

Vincent could have sworn he was running a fever with how hot he already felt, he could even feel it in his ears, he was sure that Arthur would be able to feel how fast his heart was beating against his jugular. For a moment, Vincent thought he had gotten used to the feeling until Arthur incorporated his teeth and began to truly sample his skin that he had been so desperate to since almost the first day they had met.

Arthur could feel Vincent flinch beneath him as he sunk his teeth into his neck but he made sure not to chomp down too hard, just enough for him to want more. He could taste a familiar saltiness that Arthur assumed was due to the work Vincent had been doing during the morning before he had arrived, and it only fueled him further. Suddenly, Vincent's hands came from around Arthur and gently pushed him away so that he could reach up and start to haphazardly unbutton the buttons of his shirt.

Arthur released a small but audible grunt as he realized that Vincent was on the same page as he was... And the more of his body that was revealed to him, the stiffer Arthur became and he was confident that there was _no way_ he would be walking it off with dignity... Which only solidified his decision to punish Vincent and he was excited to do so... But not before leaning in and sampling the exposed areas of Vincent's chest.

Finally releasing a small breathy moan, Vincent leaned his head back against the wall as he breathed shaky breaths and tried to talk down his arousal to no avail... Though he thought he had calmed down to a point until he suddenly felt Arthur's lips suck one of his nipples into his mouth. He gasped and shivered before a louder more obvious moan made its way out of him.

Arthur was having _far_ too much fun... He knew that he didn't deserve it but dammit he couldn't stop. Feeling Vincent fidget against him like a horny sheltered school girl, Arthur had to physically stop himself from just giving in and turning Vincent around against the wall. He took his time freeing Vincent's bud and trailed kisses back up his chest, to his collar, up across his neck, and finally landing a much more reserved and gentle kiss against Vincent's lips.

Taking a breath, Arthur swallowed harshly, making sure he had a firm hold against Vincent's hips before grinding his forward, making his erection clearly known to the young man in front of him and feeling it rub against Vincent's rather obvious firmness... And Arthur had to admit that he loved watching the brief pleasure cross Vincent's features, he couldn't wait to watch him as he was fucked...

"You feel that..?" He purred softly against Vincent's lips, watching the other nod in silence, preparing himself for what was to come next. "... You did that, now I'll really have to punish you." He then hummed before leaning in, but veering to the side just a bit, Arthur's lips coasted against the lobe of Vincent's ear. "What's the time?" He inquired, briefly puzzling the other, but grinding forward again, Vincent gulped as his eyes fluttered shut briefly. "Don't keep me waiting now..."

Regaining his wits, Vincent, almost shakily, reached into his breast pocket and carefully pulled out the watch that rested there as normal. It actually took him a moment to really _read_ the clock, he had been so absorbed in the activities he was partaking with Arthur he was completely and utterly off-center.

"I-It's... 12:30." He stammered softly in reply, the first verbal thing he had uttered since the steamy confrontation had begun between them, and Arthur didn't even try to repress the grin the surfaced on his face.

"... That's too bad." He suddenly mused before pulling away from Vincent's ear, still confusing the man he was holding until he carefully dropped one of the other's legs to help him get balanced before completely leaving his side. "... If your chores are gonna get done... I gotta get to work." He mentioned, and the rather evil grin Arthur sported seemed to make the realization wash over Vincent that Arthur had planned this. "... I guess this will have to be your punishment." he finally mentioned with a rather casual shrug.

Vincent gawked up at Arthur as he realized that he had fallen right into Arthur's trap... And he had thoroughly enjoyed himself doing it, but now he would have to suffer from Arthur leaving his side just as things were beginning to plateau. He stood there on one leg with one of Arthur's hands still having a rather good handful of his rear that he wasn't quite ready to let go of yet considering that was perfect about him too. However, his free hand now came up to gently surf through Vincent's gentle kinky curls that both wavered gently downward or wrapped delicately around his digits of their own accord... And Arthur was reminded how fucking beautiful Vincent was even as he stared at Arthur completely dumbfounded.

"Y-... You're not serious." He finally muttered, making a rich chortle bubble up from Arthur's depths.

"I'm afraid so..." Arthur replied smoothly, though he was beginning to wonder who he was punishing more by stopping here when Vincent was ready to bend over and take him, but he knew it would all be worth the wait.

"I-I can't believe you..." Vincent groaned, but unable to stop the small muffled mewl that escaped his lips as he felt Arthur's groin rub against his again since Arthur still had once of his legs still perfectly wrapped around his waist. "Th-This is... So not fair..." He sputtered with a small pout.

"Oh... I'd hate for you to think I was an unfair man... Maybe I should just pay you a visit tonight." He suggested wiggling his brows at Vincent who huffed but smirked back as he reached down and suddenly cupping a hand over the bulge in Arthur's trousers and beginning to rub it gently and encouraging its blood flow and finally earning a more primal reaction from Arthur who released a shuddered breath of his own and fluttering his eyes shut.

"... Or you could take me right here... Against this door." Vincent purred.

_FUCK._

Suddenly Arthur's whole plan had backfired and he desperately realized how badly he had just fucked up. It would require no effort at all to drop Vincent's leg, spin him around, and yank his pants down... But Arthur continued to remind himself that that wasn't how he wanted to take Vincent the first time they were together no matter how tempted he was, finally releasing a small breathless chuckle as a pleasure fueled blush began to heat up Arthur's expression, he slowly released Vincent's other leg.

"It wouldn't be much of a punishment if I did that, now would it?" He asked before reaching down and catching Vincent's wrist so he could pull it away from his ever-growing cock, however, he pulled Vincent's hand up until he planted his lips against the back of it, once again surprising the man in front of him with his gentle nature considered how violently he had laid out Myles Black and his lackeys in the bar.

"Damn you, Arthur." Vincent snorted, shaking his head but smiling nonetheless. "... You'll be staying here tonight..?" He then asked, watching Arthur nod in silence.

"Don't worry... I'll be sure to come see you." He crooned before taking a step forward to feel Vincent's closeness once again before leaning down and catching his lips one last time. "But I do have to go though... You might wanna..." He trailed off, motioning to Vincent's unbuttoned shirt who suddenly remembered that indeed, he was basically half-naked.

Scoffing, Vincent quickly reached down and began working on the buttons of his shirt once again as Arthur backed away with one last small chortle. Managing one last wink before Arthur ducked out of the room, however, once get was outside, Arthur took a breath and nearly stumbled backward as he leaned against the door he had shut behind him. Vincent was a fucking work of art and Arthur had desperately wanted to _paint_ his body for certain... And his face... And other places that threatened to tip Arthur over the delicate edge he was teetering upon if he wasn't careful.

Once again, it left Arthur wondering who exactly he was punishing here... But he knew it was worth the wait. However, he quickly did a once over of his surroundings, making sure that he was completely alone before having to actually unbuckle his belt and manually readjust himself in his pants to try and hide his rather prominent erection. For now, he would just try to work alone...

Pushing himself up and off the door after refastening his pants and belt, Arthur took a moment to roll his neck as he reminded himself that he still got it. Recalling how flustered and wanting Vincent looked, Arthur could only assume that he had done a good job... And now he had the night to look forward to.

* * *

It took a lot of hard work and mental preparation before Arthur's tumescence finally began to soften. He had to keep his mind completely off Vincent or he risked it regrowing, part of him was shocked over what had just happened. He was excited to see Vincent, of course, but he hadn't been expecting... Whatever _that_ was.

What stunned Arthur more was how much Vincent seemed to want him... Just as much as he wanted Vincent.

It was worrisome and... Perhaps even scary, was Arthur prepared to go all the way with him? He was just getting used to the idea of _liking_ him more than a normal man could like another... But if they had sex... It would be like confirming that. Fucking prostitutes to quell the side of him that Arthur tried to keep from seeing the light of day was one thing... It was bearable despite feeling disgusting afterward, and it wasn't his partner's fault, Arthur was very careful with the men he chose, but he was disgusted in himself for needing it.

John was the only man that Arthur had ever felt more than sexual attraction to, and while he trusted Dutch with every fiber of his being, he wasn't in love with Dutch the way he was with John... Arthur would have done whatever it took to keep John happy... And he left anyway.

Arthur's hands briefly paused with what they were doing as that harsh reality hit him... John had been completely content with him just before vanishing... What made him think Vincent wouldn't do the same thing? It was true that Vincent couldn't really leave given his farm and all, but how did that stop him from tossing Arthur to the curb when he wasn't enough?

Gulping, Arthur reached up and wiped the sweat that was forming at his brow. He didn't think he could take that kind of heartbreak again... But why would he even be worried about suffering like that again anyway? It wasn't like he was in love with Vincent... Right?

They had only known each other for a couple of months... There was no way that Arthur could have fallen in love with him that quickly, hell it had taken him _years_ to figure out his attraction for John.

... But Vincent wasn't John.

_**BA-BUMP.** _

It would seem that Arthur had forgotten that crucial detail... Vincent _wasn't_ John, but what was that even supposed to mean? It still didn't make his feelings normal... Though it didn't make them disappear either. In fact, it almost excited Arthur in a way, which scared him even more. Vincent wasn't just a new sexual conquest... He was a man that Arthur wanted to be around... A man who he wanted to lay down and cherish, not use and get it over with.

What did it all mean?

> I don't care if it hurts  
> I'll pay my weight in blood  
> To feel my nerves wake up  
> So love me now or let me go  
> Let me feel these highs and lows  
> Before the doors to my heart close
> 
> Touch me someone  
> I'm too young to feel so  
> Numb, numb, numb, numb  
> You could be the one to
> 
> Make me feel something, something  
> Make me feel something, something  
> Show me that you're human, oh  
> Make me feel something, something
> 
> I never thought I'd miss the bittersweet  
> I gave those years away  
> And lost my sense of taste  
> 'Cause all of your lovers eventually fade  
> And leave you alone in the bed you made  
> And all of the colors that bleed to gray leave nothing
> 
> Touch me someone  
> I'm too young to feel so  
> Numb, numb, numb, numb  
> So give me just enough to
> 
> Make me feel something, something  
> Make me feel something, something  
> Show me that you're human, oh  
> Make me feel something, something
> 
> So if you're gonna stay, then stay  
> But if you're gonna go  
> Make sure that you hurt me just enough to
> 
> Make me feel something, something  
> Make me feel something, something  
> Show me that I'm human, oh  
> Make me feel something, something
> 
> Make me feel something, something
> 
> source: [Feel Something by Jaymes Young](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihwUUjB6gfU)


	11. People Like Me

Even though Arthur had some pretty harsh reminders of the reality of his situation both with Vincent and with John, Arthur laid quietly in his room in the same storage room where he just had Vincent against the wall hours prior. His arms were positioned folded behind his head and his legs were crossed casually and yet his mind was racing. After he had gotten done with the chores, his first instinct was to immediately go to Vincent's room but... It wasn't smart to fool around with him in the middle of the day despite earlier. He still didn't really know Abraham's schedule and he would rather be caught dead than be caught _on_ _top_ of Vincent in his bed...

Just the thought send chills up and down Arthur's spine and he began to wonder if this liaison was worth it, but he knew that he couldn't stop this even if he wanted to.

Upon opening his eyes, Arthur could see the outline of his room in the darkness. He had no clue what time it was, but it figured it was late, he had taken a nap earlier but ever since he had woken up all he could do was think about Vincent... Gulping Arthur sat up and combed his fingers over his hair to effectively slick the locks out of his face before standing up and meandering to the door.

For what felt like forever, Arthur stood in pause... It had been a long time since he had felt this overwhelming need to be with someone. Blinking, Arthur took one last slow deep breath before he reached forward and took ahold of the knob that led into the house before pulling it open, only to slightly jump as he saw Vincent standing there, looking just as surprised as he did with his hand poised up as if he were about to knock... Once again, they were thinking the same thing.

The two stood there for a moment in shock, but eventually Vincent just started chuckling, watching a smile melt onto Arthur's expression as he too chortled with him.

"I've... Been standing here for a while." Vincent admitted, his hesitance charming Arthur as always.

"Me too..." Arthur replied.

Once more, silence filled the air between them, but it wasn't an awkward silence... Because the two took a moment to really look at each other... And Arthur had to admit it had been eons since someone looked at him the way Vincent did, it reminded him of back when he was a young man himself. The shy smile he adorned and the shine in his eyes... It made Arthur feel wanted.

"I was beginning to wonder if you had changed your mind." Vincent then mused with a smirk.

"Well, I like to keep people waitin'... Makes you want something more when you gotta wait." Arthur replied before winking down at Vincent who rolled his eyes playfully.

"Your plan worked... You wanna... Come to my room?" He inquired in a shyly nervous fashion, it wasn't like Vincent to be so bashful and the fact that Arthur made him like that never ceased to amaze him.

"Of course... Lead the way." Arthur mused with a small grin as he remembered the last time he said those words he had Vincent up against the wall.

Nodding with a smile, Vincent reached out and took Arthur's hand in his before turning and leading him out of the room.

For such a simple gesture, it made Arthur's heart pound harshly in his chest. The trip to Vincent's room was a short one, it was only down the hall but in those few moments, Arthur looked down to their hands and he couldn't help but squeezing Vincent's gently and his decision was only more cemented as he felt the other squeeze his hand back.

When Vincent opened the door to his room, only then did his hand slip from Arthur's and he was quick to shut the door softly behind them and locking it in place before finally turning back to face Arthur and smiling as he brushed passed him and walked over to the bed.

"I may have gotten something special..." He mentioned as he reached into the nightstand drawer.

"Special for little ol' me?" Arthur inquired with a small chuckled as he walked forward.

"Not for you, for both of us." Vincent snorted with a grin before turning back and holding out a bottle to Arthur who took it and examined it.

"Is this the stuff we stole from your father?" Arthur questioned with a small grin.

"Uh-huh... I saw that you replaced it for him so I got a bottle just for us." Vincent replied.

Arthur looked at the label of the bottle for a moment as he recalled the first time he had drank this with Vincent... It was one of the first times that Arthur had truly felt a connection between them beyond the norm. Looking up to the young man in front of him, Arthur's eyes honed in on his features, from his eyes, to his smile and lower to his neck. All he could think about now was how _good_ Vincent's skin tasted against his lips.

"... What're you thinkin' about Arthur?" Vincent then asked, tilting his head.

For once... Arthur wanted to be truly honest with himself.

"... You." Arthur breathed out softly. "... You're all I've been thinkin' about lately." He confessed as he slowly sat the bottle back down onto the nightstand, however his words were soft, almost somber. "I think about..." He trailed off, watching Vincent frown just slightly before he reached forward and took one of Arthur's hands.

"... You think about what?" He asked.

On instinct, Arthur wanted to shut down, to tell him it was nothing... To tell him not to worry, but when Arthur looked back up to Vincent's eyes he breathed out and looked to their conjoined hands and slowly began to pull Vincent closer to him.

"... About how every time I look at you, I wanna be better... About how you deserve a man much better than me... Or maybe when I'm with you I can... I dunno." Arthur eventually chuckled as Vincent blushed and looked stunned by Arthur's vulnerability and the closer he came the better it felt.

Eventually, Arthur reached out and rested his free hand upon Vincent's hip while the other hand that he held his caressed the back of it gently. Arthur was never one to express himself the right way but he tried when it counted, and thankfully it seemed that Vincent could tell. He smiled that sweet smile that always threatened to bring Arthur to his knees before carefully leading Arthur's hand to his other hip.

"... How would you know what I deserve? I ain't perfect ya know." He mused softly to break just a some of the tension that Arthur was holding and Arthur could help but chuckle softly as he slowly began to pull Vincent closer to him. "After all... I'm attracted to men like you right?" he then asked in good humor, watching Arthur actually pause and laugh.

"I cannot argue that." Arthur replied before looking up and realizing that he and Vincent were just about as close as they were going to get... There was only one thing left to do now.

His eyes glanced around the room just for a moment out of instinct and noticed that Vincent had already pulled the curtains down in his room. Knowing they had a locked door behind them and covered windows, Arthur didn't have any more excuses. Leaning in, Arthur finally pressed his lips back against Vincent's and hearing the other sigh and reach up to rest his palms gently upon his shoulders, Arthur felt himself melting into it.

Just like before, it didn't take long for things to begin to heat up. As their tongues began dancing, Arthur's grip on Vincent's hips increased but it seemed this time around that Vincent wanted to take the lead. Slowly beginning to back up toward his bed, Arthur thought the other was wanting to be laid down which he was _not_ opposed to but Arthur was actually surprised when Vincent spun them around at a leisurely pace and when they finally pulled away from one another Vincent gently pushed against Arthur, silently suggesting him to sit as he felt the bed brush the back of his legs.

Without protest, Arthur did as he was asked and lowered himself onto the bed, actually looking _up_ at Vincent for a change who seemed to grin before stepping up to him and teasingly began to crawl on top of him until he was effectively straddling Arthur on the bed. Wrapping his arms almost lazily around Arthur's neck, Vincent's eyes met Arthur's and for once Arthur felt a familiarity as he gazed into them... They almost felt like Dutch's in a way that they sucked him in.

Arthur almost felt as if he was spoiling Vincent's body by touching him, but he couldn't help himself. His hands slowly crept up a bit until his fingers delicately ghosted the other's sides beneath the fabric of his shirt. Inhaling calmly, Arthur pulled Vincent a little closer as a small smile made its way onto Arthur's face.

"... I think I finally figured it out." Arthur mused softly.

"What?" Vincent asked curiously as one of his hands came up to run carefully through Arthur's mane of brunette hair.

"You." Arthur replied, though seeming only slightly confused look cross Vincent's face, Arthur continued. "I figured out how you got me on your hook... You make me feel alive again." He explained.

"I hope I didn't awaken a beast." Vincent chortled softly, once more making Arthur beam a smile and chuckle with him.

"That you'll have to find out on your own." He mused before leaning in and kissed his lips one last time before finally beginning to travel to his neck once again.

Vincent shivered just a bit now that he was prepared for Arthur's antics, but one of his hands crept up the back of Arthur's neck and into his hair once again, the feeling sending a shudder through Arthur's body on its own. This time though... He wasn't running on limited time, he could savor Vincent's skin and relish his reactions against him. However, Vincent wasn't nearly as patient this time and pushed Arthur away so he could lean in and kiss him far more passionately than before.

When he pulled back, the two of them were panting quietly... It was time for Arthur to get a taste of his own medicine, though Vincent wasn't nearly as cruel. Reaching up, Vincent began to unbutton Arthur's shirt, desperately wanting to see what his clothing had been hiding from him all this time. Arthur almost felt shy, he wasn't an insecure man, and he sure as hell knew what he was doing when it came to fucking men... But knowing Vincent was going to see his scarred imperfect exterior, Arthur subtly gulped but he didn't resist.

When Vincent had the last button undone he seemed in awe of the view in front of him for a moment but it only took a glance before he leaned down to kiss Arthur's neck, nipping it sharply and earning a soft grunt from Arthur, whose hands soon fell back down and back around to get handfuls of the other's ass and squeezing liberally, feeling Vincent flinch against him and earning a soft sigh.

"God, you're beautiful." Arthur growled softly before one of his hands slowly came up and surfed beneath Vincent's shirt to freely feel his smooth back.

"Speak for yourself." Vincent chortled as he pulled back to see Arthur's only _slightly_ flustered expression.

He could feel the telltale stiffening in his trousers, and he was certain the Vincent was beginning to feel the effects of his own erection as well. Arthur never wanted to forget what Vincent looked like, panting, and wanting more of him... He was determined to see that look again. Hesitantly removing his hands from Vincent's backside they began to mirror his actions and unbuttoning his shirt, desperately wanting to feel his skin against one another.

Vincent grinned and bit his lip in anticipation once he saw Arthur starting to disrobe him. He was ready to just shrug his shirt off when suddenly the fire came to mind, and Vincent tensed in Arthur's arms, pausing, Arthur looked up and he could see the other smiling nervously at him.

"S-Sorry." He muttered.

"Don't be... What is it?" Arthur inquired as he calmed his raging hormones at least for a minute.

"I-It's foolish." Vincent sighed.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"N-No... It's just... The scars from the barn are still healing and my shoulder is still tender... I just don't think it would be very fun for you to have to deal with or look at." He explained regretfully, but he was shocked when Arthur actually snickered at him.

"Don't forget I changed your bandages when they were still fresh." He reminded, watching a bright and embarrassing blush come over Vincent's cheeks.

"Aren't I the idiot..." He grumbled at himself, but Arthur just reached up and gently caressed Vincent's cheek, quelling his self-loathing.

"... You know, you're also the one who said we ain't in a rush." Arthur then stated, offering a gentle smile up at the other, seeing relief wash over Vincent's face.

"Yeah... B-But I want to, honestly." Vincent argued as he leaned into Arthur's touch, watching the other sigh.

"I do too... You have... _No_ idea." He muttered, almost groaning at the thought of Vincent beneath him writhing in desire. "... But my pleasures are decidedly rough, and I don't want to worry about hurtin' you." He explained seriously, watching the blush on Vincent's face only deepen at his words but there was still a look in Arthur's eye. "... However, that don't mean we gotta just stop here."

Vincent was almost confused until he suddenly felt Arthur's hands fiddling with his belt while his cobalt hues looked over his form as if it were the last time he was seeing it. He had never felt so wanted by anyone before... He swallowed harshly once he felt his zipper come down and Arthur wasted no time in diving in. Vincent gasped harshly in surprise when he felt Arthur's hand actually wrap around his shaft and Arthur had to take a breath as he smirked... Finally feeling what Vincent was made of.

"There you are." He cooed softly, carefully running his hand up along the length and back down in smooth succession and watching Vincent begin to submit to the feeling.

"A-Arthur..." He muttered, his voice strained with want.

"Hm?"

"Y-You don't have to do this..." Vincent replied.

"Of course I don't... But it seems like you want me to." Arthur hummed, all too pleased with himself.

It didn't take long for Arthur to gently maneuver Vincent's member until he had pulled it out of his pants, and only releasing it for a moment, Arthur brought his hand up and spat into it to provide some lubrication before once again stroking almost painfully slow. His eyes stayed focused on Vincent's face and gauging how he felt... And seeing the pleasure beginning to contort Vincent's expression nearly had Arthur drooling like a goddamn animal.

Unable to hold it in for much longer, Vincent moaned softly and his grip on Arthur's shoulders began to increase. He sounded so fucking perfect, Arthur wanted to hear more and he couldn't wait to hear Vincent screaming his name... Which only fueled Arthur further, especially since the longer he continued this treatment the more precum that gathered at the head of Vincent's manhood.

"How does it feel..?" Arthur asked.

"Good... Fuck, Arthur..." Vincent groaned and leaned his forehead against Arthur's for a few moments.

"That's right..." He purred before his hand began to increase in speed, he wasn't trying to overwhelm Vincent yet, but he wanted more.

"A-Ah... Arthur..." He whined in a far more needy fashion than before, Arthur _loved_ the way his name fell off the other's lips.

Unable to handle it anymore, his free hand came down and slicked his fingers with Vincent's wetness before reaching around. His pants were loose due to Arthur unbuckling his belt and it required almost no effort for him to dip his hand inside. Vincent's eyes opened quickly in surprise once he realized what Arthur had planned on doing but he relaxed, quickly tilting Arthur's head up so he could lock lips with him once again.

Only when he felt Vincent's lips against his own did Arthur begin teasing at the other's entrance, and finally feeling Arthur's fingers coming _so close_ to entering him, Vincent moaned a bit louder into the kiss before pulling back. His simpering gaze only telling Arthur to continue until he began to apply pressure... And _finally_ sinking his middle finger inside of him.

Gasping harshly, Vincent's hand quickly came up to slap over his mouth as he felt Arthur working both his front _and_ his back. Chuckling softly at the display of obvious shock and need, Arthur inserted his digit a bit further in.

"A-Arthur i-if you don't stop... I-I'm gonna..." Vincent trailed off with soft huffs of breath.

"Good." Arthur replied, feeling Vincent's manhood nearly throbbing before shrugging off his shirt entirely so that Vincent didn't need to worry about making a mess and encouraging him further. "Don't keep me waitin' now."

Vincent panted and shivered, occasionally arching his back as he felt Arthur's finger graze just the right spot inside him. He certainly wasn't expecting Arthur to be so good at pleasing him, he truly thought Arthur was _normal_ like everyone else when they had first met, but feeling how expertly his hands worked on his body, he would have ventured to guess that this _wasn't_ Arthur's first rodeo.

"I-I'm almost there..." Vincent warned, his voice beginning to heighten in pitch and his breathing beginning to become shallow and stressed just from how good he was feeling.

Arthur wasted no time in adding a second finger inside Vincent hearing him wanting him so desperately, though it wasn't until Arthur's lips latched back onto Vincent's nipple and sucking greedily once again that he fell over the edge.

"O-Oh fuck Arthur! I-I'm cumming..!" Vincent cried, desperately trying to keep his volume to a minimum as he began spasming against Arthur while effectively coating Arthur's hand and abdomen with his release.

His hands eventually slowed to a stop as Vincent slightly leaned against him as he caught his breath, Arthur eventually releasing the bud positioned so perfectly on Vincent's chest and looking to see his flustered expression. Sweat had gathered at Vincent's brow and he looked completely different than he did when Arthur saw him at work, almost like another person.

"Christ..." Arthur sighed softly, loving the sight of Vincent coming undone who eventually adorned a tired smile and giggled softly.

"You're too good at that." He mused before leaning in and catching Arthur's lips in a kiss.

In truth, Arthur almost lost it watching Vincent squirming against him, he was at full sail. Arthur chuckled against Vincent's lips until he felt Vincent take hold of his wrist of the hand that was covered in his ejaculate before bringing it up and watching Vincent beginning to lick his hand clean.

"Shit..." Arthur grunted, actually feeling his own cock twitching with desire in his trousers.

When Vincent's eyes met his own, he could see the shift in his silver pools, and Arthur couldn't help but be excited.

"... If you think I'm letting you walk away with this..." Vincent mentioned before reaching down and taking hold of Arthur's stiffness outside of his pants like he had before and earning a small sharp inhale from Arthur. "... You're wrong."

Before Arthur could even say anything in response, Vincent put his flaccid member away back into his pants, though not bothering to buckle them back up, and carefully slipped himself off of Arthur's lap and positioning himself kneeling between his legs and Arthur had to take a deep breath at the sight alone. Realizing Vincent's plan of what he assumed to be sucking him off, Arthur actually gulped. However, before he started, he looked up to Arthur with a small smirk before reaching upward and resting a hand on Arthur's chest before gently pushing him back a bit.

Arthur watched carefully and leaned back as he was told, propping himself up on his palms behind him before Vincent's hand moved away from him and went back to work and starting to unbuckle Arthur's pants for him. His eyes were locked on Vincent as his movements seemed so leisurely, he knew the other was doing this to tease him, but once his pants were open, the first thing Vincent did was lean in and, like before, began to lick the cum that had gathered on Arthur's abdomen the act alone so lewd that Arthur blushed, even if only slightly.

"You are somethin' else..." He purred, watching Vincent chuckle softly against his skin once he was finished and flash a smile up at him.

"I sure as hell try." He mused before finally reaching into Arthur's waistline, feeling Arthur flinch when his fingers came in contact with his length. "Just as I thought..." He then crooned.

"What is that?" Arthur chortled.

"That you're no slouch... Not even here." Vincent commented in reply before carefully maneuvering Arthur's cock out of his trousers to view it for himself.

"Good to know I didn't disappoint." Arthur snickered in reply, however, his smirk was soon wiped from his face as he saw Vincent leaning in and lick the head slowly.

Arthur's brow twitched just slightly and he inhaled slowly, he only dreamed that this would be happening, it was almost surreal. Vincent's eyes just simpered up at him while the hand that was positioned at the base slowly began to work itself up and down. Arthur released a shaky breath as he resisted the urge to shove Vincent's head down abruptly, however, he reached up and began to run his hands greedily through Vincent's wavy locks, they felt so soft against his fingers and he wanted nothing more than to tug on them.

He couldn't resist grasping a fistful of it, pulling a few stray locks out of the other's face so that there was no obstruction of Arthur's view, especially as Vincent inserted the head into his mouth, wrapping his perfect lips around it and sinking down a bit before pulling back up and showing special attention to the tip while lubricating the rest for his hand to continue stroking.

Vincent seemed to be good at this too... Perhaps too good, it made Arthur curious for sure, but his mind couldn't wander for long before Vincent could no longer resist beginning to bob his head up and down at a decent pace.

"Jesus Christ..." Arthur groaned softly as sweat began to form at his brow and his hips bucked forward slightly uncontrollably.

The shock of Arthur's thrust didn't stop Vincent, in fact, he even winked up at Arthur as he continued, slurping down expertly on Arthur's cock. He couldn't help glancing to the door just in case, they had done a good job at keeping their noises at a minimum, but this wasn't his house after all and despite knowing Vincent locked the door, Arthur had to force himself just to focus on the young man who was literally on his knees sucking his dick and doing such a good job at it.

"I'm close..." Arthur warned, just in case Vincent didn't want a surprise shot in the back of his throat.

Though, it seemed that it only encouraged the other man as he started going deeper and deeper with Arthur's shaft and dipping it into the back of his throat like a goddamn incubus. Arthur released a grunt and a struggled breath as he hand that was entangled in Vincent's head began to guide him at just a slightly quicker pace, but Vincent took it with grace, the obscene wet slurping sounds only pushing Arthur that much closer to the edge.

However, as he felt him beginning to spill over the edge, Arthur quickly took his hand away from Vincent's head just in case he wanted to pull away.

"Sh-Shit, I'm cumming..!" Arthur gasped out, leaning his head back as his eyes fluttered shut as his hands gripped the blanket beneath him tightly.

Vincent didn't hesitate to bring his head back down and paused only when he felt Arthur's cum beginning to flow into his mouth, though his hand continued working at the shaft to make sure he got every last drop. Once he was sure that Arthur was finished, Vincent swallowed before slowly bringing his head off Arthur's member and licking his lips tantalizingly as Arthur refocused back onto him and panting.

He wished he could have lasted a little longer, but considering the show that Vincent had put on for him earlier, he was already on borrowed time. He eventually smirked once more and reached back down to run his hand longingly through Vincent's hair to which the other leaned into.

"... You've done this before, haven't you?" Arthur inquired in good humor, watching Vincent chortle almost richly before he wiped his mouth.

"I could have asked you the same thing." he quipped before standing back up over Arthur after tucking him back into his pants like a gentleman.

Arthur didn't hesitate to reach out and pull Vincent closer, there was no question that they were compatible now and Arthur couldn't wait to explore this further even if he had to wait a bit longer. For once, he truly hoped that the gang stuck around here for a long time... He found that he was beginning to resist wanting to leave here and that was dangerous.

Even so, Arthur wrapped his arms loosely around Vincent's waist and rested his head against the other's stomach while the other lazily wrapped his arms back around Arthur's shoulders. Taking a slow inhale, Arthur eventually pulled back and looked up to Vincent somewhat remorsefully.

"What's the time?" He asked, knowing he couldn't stick around here forever, Vincent hummed before nodding to the nightstand where his watch laid.

Arthur reached over nonchalantly, not exactly in a hurry either and not really wanting to let the other go quite yet but as he pulled the clock over and opened the face he sighed. It was already late and if Abraham wasn't home yet Arthur expected him to be any minute, and while he wasn't exactly worried about him barging into his grown son's room, there was always that possibility.

"Probably should turn in soon..." He sighed regretfully as he felt Vincent's hand gently run over his cheek.

Frowning only slightly, Vincent nodded and managed to pull himself away from Arthur so that the other could stand back up as well and gather himself back up. Arthur slipped his shirt back on in relative silence and began to button it with some haste since he didn't want to risk Abraham seeing him sneak out of Vincent's room at such a late hour.

"You know..." Vincent murmured from behind him, making Arthur's movements pause. "... I-I'm not trying to make something here that ain't but... If you want to use a comfortable bed opposed to the floor, you're more than welcome staying in here." He offered since he still didn't quite know where his relationship with Arthur was heading.

"... You think that's wise?" Arthur asked hesitantly.

"I dunno... My pa ain't really the touchy-feely type, and he's never sought out much from me besides work... Even as a boy." Vincent explained, making Arthur turn around to face him only to see that Vincent had his back turned to him as he slipped off his belt for the night. "... So I don't really think it'll be a problem as long as we aren't obvious, and I dunno about you, but I'm not interested in getting lynched." He explained with a level of seriousness as he turned toward Arthur.

_**BA-BUMP.** _

"... That happens around here?" Arthur asked, worried about the answer.

"... Not for a while, but honestly I just assume it's because people like me learned to keep it quiet." Vincent replied, making Arthur tilt his head somewhat.

People like him..? How was Vincent comfortable enough to openly associate himself with the queers? Though it made a hard truth hit Arthur considering he would have had sex with Vincent tonight had them the chance... And even now, Arthur still wanted him even with the rather blatant confession... Did that mean..?

Blinking, Arthur averted his gaze for a moment, he couldn't believe he had almost gone looking for male company in the area, he surely wouldn't have done it in this town, or perhaps even in the neighboring ones if he could help it, but if they lynched queers in this locality, that meant they probably did it in the surrounding counties as well. The thought sent a cold chill down Arthur's body, he was careful when he went prowling but that didn't mean anything especially if he tried picking up the wrong person.

"... People like you, hm?" Arthur inquired softly, watching an almost bitter smile bleed onto Vincent's expression as he looked away.

"... I've never... Well, it's quite obvious why I don't have a wife now, right?" He asked before sighing. "... It's not like I didn't try to be normal... I used to pray that it would go away." He admitted, and suddenly Arthur felt his heart speeding up as he realized that was _exactly_ how he felt. "But this... Thing... My feelings for men... It's just as much a part of me like my eyes or my skin... It ain't goin' away, so I just decided to embrace it in my private life when I had the chance..." He explained before taking a breath and looking back to Arthur. "... I understand if... This is as far as it goes. I would just rather you be honest with me, I've been burned before."

That piqued Arthur's interest, he recalled when he had told the other that he deserved better, and Vincent jokingly replied that he had been burned before and motioning to his arm, he didn't think the other was being serious about his feelings having been hurt before.

_It's just as much a part of me like my eyes or my skin... It ain't goin' away..._

Swallowing somewhat, Arthur looked down to his hand as he thought about Vincent's words and how much they made sense. Arthur had felt the same thing for _years_... He just thought that... It would go away, truly he thought that once John had gone it would fade away since he had Abigail and Jack to care for but it never did. It haunted him everywhere he went... And maybe it was haunting him because he refused to accept it.

He recalled how the men he paid to bed were either just trying to get it over with to get their money and others were so falsely affectionate he fucked them purely to get his money's worth, but his feelings for Vincent... For John... They were something more than a simple urge to be sated... They were apart of him.

Finally meeting Vincent's eyes, he could tell the other was nervous... Why wouldn't he be anyway? His silvers showed actual vulnerability as Arthur stepped toward him and he was quick to cast them away, but feeling Arthur's hand coming in contact with his waist and pulling him closer, he looked up with surprise before he felt Arthur kiss his lips slowly.

It felt... So right... And feeling Vincent relax in his grasp and wrap his arms around his neck, Arthur pulled away slowly to see those brilliant silver pools.

"... I'll think about it." He said finally, knowing that was the best he could do for now and thankfully Vincent offered a smile.

"It's not like I'm goin' anywhere..." He replied, watching Arthur smile at him as well before nodding.

"You better not... Have a good night, Vincent." Arthur mused.

"You too, Arthur." Vincent replied with a small wink as Arthur made sure he was all put together before quietly slipping out of the room.

Arthur took a breath once he was alone again and quickly made his way toward his room and ducked in with haste, not wanting to be seen in the main house so late. However, he desperately needed a cigarette before he could even _think_ about sleeping for the night. He couldn't believe he had just received a blow job from Vincent, and a _good one_ to boot. He surfed into his satchel and pulled out his pack and his lighter before stepping outside into the crisp night air and popping the stick between his lips.

Upon inhaling the fresh smoke Arthur tried to think rationally about his situation. If he knew Dutch, he knew the other was just _waiting_ to have the perfect opportunity, which could have meant anything at any time. He didn't want to reel Vincent in on false pretenses and he also had Abigail and Jack to worry about. He was done juggling romances after the last time...

Before Arthur could come to a conclusion that suited him though, he heard a noise coming toward the barn, it sounded like something had fallen. Frowning, Arthur reached down to his hip and checked his revolver, noting that it was loaded before he began trudging toward it, not willing to allow the Taylor family to lose more than they already had. Why would anyone be there at this time anyway..?

Arthur made sure to keep his presence to a minimum, wanting to catch whoever it was in the act, and the closer he got to the shell of the new barn the worse he felt, however as he crept around to the archway for the door he listened carefully, and it sounded like someone was shuffling around items inside. Quickly dipping around the corner with his hand ready on his gun, Arthur stopped in his tracks when he realized it was none other than Abraham.

"That you, Callahan?" He asked with some surprise.

"Oh, yes... Sorry, sir, thought someone was causing trouble." he apologize, resting a hand on his chest lightly to slow his racing heart and taking his hand off his gun.

"Well, thank you for coming to check up on the noise, I hope I didn't wake you." Abraham mentioned casually as he moved a few boards to the side, but Arthur was quick to help him.

"Um... You didn't, don't worry." Arthur muttered as he recalled Abraham's son writhing on his lap not even half an hour ago.

"Thank you, my boy." Abraham mentioned once they had set the boards aside. "The workers are good at what they do but they don't clean up before takin' off for the day." He sighed.

"Pardon me, but shouldn't you be in bed at this hour too?" Arthur asked curiously.

"Ah, I never sleep much, I never have." Abraham mentioned, briefly waving off Arthur's concern. "Ever since the fire last year... Sleep hasn't been kind to me." He admitted.

"I'm sure... My condolences." Arthur said, nodding seriously.

"Thank you... To think I almost lost Vincent too..." Abraham replied before he took his hat off and slicked his jet black hair back, but even in the moonlight, Arthur could see some silver strands peeking through. "I know we've thanked you plenty but... I dunno what I woulda done if..." Abraham muttered, trailing off.

"... I've lost a child, I understand in a way." Arthur confessed, seeing Abraham gawk over at him in surprise. "He was young... _I_ was young." He explained with a small shrug.

"It's the worst pain, buryin' your children, I thought losin' my wife would kill me but... Losin' Isaac too..." Abraham sighed as he reached into his jacket and pulled out a flask, unable to stop Arthur feeling just a twinge of worry in his gut for the obviously broken man before him, how he managed to keep it together all the time eluded Arthur, though Arthur repressed the small smile at recalling how he felt when Vincent had told him of his deceased brother's name. "... And that's why, should you ever need a place to stay, work, or get back on your feet, you'll always have a home here Arthur." Abraham stated, and though Arthur remembered him mentioning it when he had originally saved Vincent, people said a lot of things when they were that kind of situation, he wasn't expecting anything out of it.

"Y-You're too kind... You and Vincent both had been nothin' but good to me, please don't feel the need to extend more than necessary to me." He muttered, he still felt guilty for his affair with Vincent, after all, he felt uncomfortable with the trust that exuded from the bearded man's eyes.

"Well, just know the offer is there... Don't worry about me, I'm just about done here, I don't want to keep you." Abraham then mentioned, waving Arthur off to dismiss him.

"You sure?" Arthur offered.

"O'course... Go get some rest son, you deserve it." Abraham said offhandedly, almost making Arthur blush bashfully.

_Son..._

Gulping, Arthur suddenly wanted to be as far away as possible, and he didn't hesitate in nodding his goodbye and walking back toward the house. For once, he walked through the front door since it was closer and he knew that Abraham was in the barn but he walked toward his room, and as soon as he rested his hand on the doorknob... Arthur's form froze... Before he looked down the hall where he could see Vincent's door.

_I-I'm not trying to make something here that ain't but... If you want to use a comfortable bed opposed to the floor, you're more than welcome staying in here._

_... I'll think about it._

_Should you ever need a place to stay, work or get back on your feet, you'll always have a home here Arthur._

Arthur blinked... Surely it was wrong to take advantage of Abraham's son, especially in his own house but... Arthur knew better than that, Vincent wanted this just as much as he did... And even though Arthur _knew_ this was a bad idea... His hand slipped off the doorknob before he walked down the hall and no longer hesitated in slipping into Vincent's room to retire for the night.

* * *

Dark eyes followed Arthur's form as he retreated back to the house... Where they had gotten so lucky to have a worker like Arthur never ceased to amaze him, but perhaps his family's luck was beginning to turn for the better. He sighed in exhaustion as Abraham reached up to run a hand over his beard before he walked over to a stack of boards and parked himself upon them.

He was so tired... But his nights were always plagued of the fire that took the love of his life and his firstborn son. He feared closing his eyes and watching them die once again... He was so exhausted in fact that he didn't hear another person approaching him from behind.

"Figured I'd find you here." The familiar voice making Abraham jump and turn.

"Jackson..." He sighed recognizing his brother. "Scared the hell outta me... What're you doin' here this late?" He asked.

"I closed the bar and figured I'd come to see the progress." He replied casually as he walked forward and looked up and around.

Abraham relaxed and did the same, taking a breath. It was a bittersweet moment, while he was happy to upgrade the old barn, he didn't want it at the price of his remaining son's life.

"I was wondering when you'd come around." Abraham then mentioned somewhat dryly as he side-eyed his brother. "It only took you a few weeks..."

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize how bad it was until Vincent and one of your farmhands came in to see me, he was sportin' bandages." Jackson replied as Abraham turned his back to him to continue looking at the progress on his property.

"... As I recall it took you plenty of time last time too." Abraham commented.

He and Jackson never had the best of relationships even since they were young, Jackson had always been the black sheep anyway, though as they matured and came to be adults, they at least were able to remain cordial most of the time. However, it still stung Abraham that his brother never bothered to check up on him after the death of his wife and son. After their parents had left the property to himself, he wasn't sure if Jackson would ever forgive him even though it wasn't really his fault. He had made a success out of the once small couple acre farm and proved that he was the right choice to his brother's dismay but after the other had taken control of the largest bar in town, their feud seemed to die with their parents for the most part.

Abraham felt Jackson's hand come up to wrap around his shoulders and hug him gently.

"Come on, that ain't fair... You know that place keeps me just as busy as yours does you." Jackson sighed as Abraham rolled his eyes subtly.

"Busy enough to be messin' around with the Black's?" Abraham suddenly inquired, arching an unamused brow over at his brother who seemed to freeze momentarily.

"... You know about that, huh?" Jackson muttered his voice softer than before.

"You ain't as slick as you think you are... After what they did to-"

"There was never any proof of their involvement... And you know that." Jackson interjected as Abraham shrugged quickly out of his embrace and turned away from him.

"I _know_ they were involved somehow! I ain't an idiot!" He growled, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

Jackson took a breath as he watched Abraham take a few steps away from him... Before slowly beginning to approach him again.

"... You need to take some time off, my brother." He sighed as he came to Abraham's side.

However, before he could even register what the other was planning, a knife was plunged _deep_ into Abraham's back. He gasped out and looked over to his brother in complete shock as he felt the other beginning to twist the blade, he fell quickly to his knees as he released a sputtered groan.

"J-... Jackson... You..." He grunted as Jackson stood over him, a cold look plastered on his expression.

"If only you and your disappointment had died with them... This would have been so much easier." He sighed almost with annoyance as he kicked Abraham over onto his side who was quick to roll over on his stomach and beginning to try and crawl away as he felt his back becoming wet and warm with his own blood.

He couldn't believe this was happening... Abraham was so certain it was one of his neighbors that he done this to his family... When in reality it had been right under his fucking nose.

"Y-... You won't... Get away with this..." Abraham wheezed as he heard Jackson up behind him.

"I don't really think you need to worry about that anymore, brother." He chuckled before roughly pulling the blade from Abraham's back, only to plunge it again higher, almost immediately puncturing his heart.

Abraham gasped loudly and went rigid for a moment before everything began to slow down... And he was sucked into darkness.

> I've looked a long time to find you  
>  I drifted through the universe, just to lay  
>  Beside you  
>  Anywhere you want me to take you, I'll go  
>  Yeah  
>  But there's things about me that you just don't know
> 
> If I told you where I've been  
>  Would you still call me baby?  
>  And if I told you everything  
>  Would you call me crazy?
> 
> 'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star,  
>  Oh  
>  'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star  
>  Oh
> 
> My heart was born out of the fire  
>  I lost love a thousand years ago  
>  And still, I can't find her  
>  Now I don't love like I used to  
>  Oh but I've got stories I could tell you, if I want to
> 
> If I told you where I've been  
>  Would you still call me baby?  
>  And if I told you everything  
>  Would you call me crazy?
> 
> 'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star,  
>  Oh  
>  'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star  
>  Oh
> 
> If I told you where I've been  
>  Would you still call me baby?  
>  And if I told you everything  
>  Would you call me crazy?
> 
> 'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star,  
>  Oh  
>  'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star  
>  Oh
> 
> 'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star,  
>  Oh  
>  'Cause baby I'm a dark star, dark star  
>  Oh
> 
> source: [Dark Star by Jaymes Young](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlXQIotlx3U)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAH I know things are really starting to heat up. I hope I'm keeping you guys on your toes with my plan for this fic and I hope you all are still enjoying it! If you have any criticism do feel free to let me know! Thank you all so much for reading as usual!  
> -Eros


	12. Say It Ain't So

Vincent had wrapped himself around Arthur comfortably throughout the night, and Arthur couldn't remember a time he had slept so deeply. He laid shirtless on top of the blankets with loosened pants on his back, while Vincent dressed in the same fashion laid on his side against Arthur, their legs entangling loosely. Arthur's arm draped over Vincent's form and gently held him close during their slumber and thanks to the other's warmth, Arthur didn't get cold.

_knock-..._

_..._

_knock-... knock..._

_..._

_knock. Knock. Knock!_

_..._

_tap. Tap. Tippity-tap._

_..._

_BANG! BANG! BANG!._

Vincent sat up quickly with a gasp, completely jolted from the sudden noise and was briefly panicked when it felt like the entire house was echoing with knocks and bangs, however within a few seconds, Vincent gathered himself and rubbed his eyes to realize that someone was knocking on the front door, another person at the side door, and there was even someone tapping on his window. What on earth could be going on? Glancing over as Arthur groggily reached up to rub his face, still reeling from being woken.

Gulping, Vincent got up from the bed and hurried over to the window and peeked out, tilting his head to note it was one of his ranch hands. Looking over to make sure that he wouldn't expose Arthur in his bed, he pulled open a portion of the curtain before unlatching the window and opening it up.

"Christ, Johnson what the hell is going on!?" he asked.

"V-Vincent, sir you need to come to the barn right now!" The hand said in panic.

Furrowing his brows, Vincent nodded regardless and shut the window and curtain, turning back just in time to see Arthur sitting at the side of the bed.

"W-What was that?" He groaned as the knocking gradually stopped.

"I don't know... One of the hands just came to the window and told me I needed to go to the barn right now... I'm worried Arthur." Vincent muttered as he hurried in grabbing a shirt.

Arthur frowned with worry as well before he snatched his shirt off the bedpost where he had hung it and slipped it over his shoulders with ease as the gravity of the situation hit them. The fact that the hands had gone so far as to bang on Vincent's window it must have been serious. He hoped it wasn't another fire, but he didn't see any ominous glow, though the further he got to being ready, the larger the pit in his stomach became. Once he had finished buckling his belt he looked over to see Vincent pulling his boots on.

"I'll head out the side door and meet you out." He stated, watching Vincent look up and nod briefly.

He could tell the other was nervous considering he himself already had a bad feeling. Arthur was just there last night, what could have possibly happened in the hours leading up to now? Arthur carefully opened Vincent's door and peered out for any sign of Abraham, though he assumed the other man to be there already considering there was banging at the front door that was never answered. He quietly ducked into his side room and then out the door just a few seconds before Vincent came running out of the front door to catch up with him.

Arthur started up a jog once Vincent got to his side and he could already see a crowd forming at the barn. Most of the men seemed in grief with their hats off and in silence when they arrived, and suddenly that pit became a full crater in Arthur's gut. Vincent panted softly as he and Arthur weaved through a couple of people toward the archway until it came to view.

Vincent stopped in his tracks as he saw a figure beneath a white sheet with an object sticking straight up out of it in the middle of the construction. The younger of the two visibly gulped as he reached up to rub his chin briefly with anxiety. His eyes then began surfing around, knowing that he had no business being in here without his father.

"Sh-Should we wait for my pa?" Vincent asked with obvious hesitance.

_**BA-BUMP.** _

Suddenly everything in Arthur's head clicked and a bead of sweat began forming at his forehead before he cautiously began walking forward without a word. Vincent looked on in confusion for a moment and in silence as Arthur walked with rigidity and tension. As he got within a few feet, Arthur took a breath and prayed he was wrong until he carefully stepped over the discernable corpse to the opposite side before kneeling.

For just a moment he hesitated as his hand grasped the sheet, and he glanced up to Vincent.

"A-Arthur what are you doin'..?" He muttered.

Blinking, Arthur lifted the sheet upward, still shielding Vincent's view just in case he was indeed wrong knowing the other didn't want to disrespect his father's authority, but his heart dropped and his form deflated. He looked on in complete disbelief, noting Vincent in his peripheral for a moment, obviously puzzled until Arthur looked up with nothing but remorse.

Vincent was completely disarmed by Arthur's look and he furrowed his brows momentarily and actually took a step back until Arthur slowly, with gentle respect, pulled the sheet over to reveal who was indeed under it... And for the first time since Arthur had known him, Vincent's face looked like that of a destroyed child. He watched it happen in slow motion, the slow wash of realization sweeping over his face followed by nothing but horrified anguish and grief.

His breathing began to speed up into panicked huffs and for a moment he was completely paralyzed standing there, having absolutely no clue what to do with himself. It was hell to watch but with the realization, the disbelief came next but Vincent's strength was completely sapped from him and he collapsed to his knees.

"No... No this... This isn't..." He whispered before beginning to crawl forward toward his deceased father as tears began to gather in his silver pools, though he refused to let them fall as if it would confirm his worst fear. "This isn't happening..."

Arthur wanted to say something, anything, but he knew that there was absolutely nothing that could be said or done except remain ready for support. He remembered it with Annabelle and he felt absolutely gutted for Vincent... He was the last of his family now.

"This... This isn't happening..." He repeated quietly as he reached forward with a trembling hand and pulled the sheet lower to expose the large hunting knife sticking out of his back before his hand came up to cover his mouth, afraid he would vomit at first.

Unable to help himself, Arthur quickly reached forward and landed a strong hand onto Vincent's shoulder, managing to pull him out of his rambling to look up just as the first of his tears fell down onto his father's corpse.

"... This is real... Isn't it..?" He then asked, eerily quiet and it shattered Arthur's heart to see the pure disbelief radiating in the breaking soul in front of him, he almost cried for him, but he swallowed the small lump in his throat before nodding.

"... Afraid so, partner." He replied just as softly.

When Vincent blinked, the shift was immediate from disbelief to complete and utter despair before he released a choked out-breath before his eyes shifted over to the blade that stuck out of the body and without another instant his jaw clenched and the tears began to fall freely.

"F-For god sake Arthur, take that fucking knife out of him!" He suddenly screamed, making Arthur jump with just how raw and broken it sounded but he nodded silently.

Reaching forward, Arthur swallowed harshly as he wrapped his fingers around the obsidian handle and he looked up for a moment. Vincent nodded before his eyes fluttered shut and Arthur began to pull, there was a moment of resistance but thankfully it slid out after jostling it free and he unsheathed the bloody blade from his father's body.

"... Thank you." He whispered after before finally reaching down and resting his hand upon the downed man's back.

Vincent looked physically ill at feeling how cold and stiff his father's corpse was but he finally allowed himself to sob as his free hand came back up to cup over his mouth once again. Arthur averted his gaze just for a moment to allow Vincent a moment and his eyes soon lowered to the knife in his hand, soon it was Arthur's turn to become confused. He recognized this blade...

It had an ebony handle which was uncommon for the style of hunting blade, and it was finely crafted. It looked custom and it was weird that the assailant would leave such a beautiful tool unless they were trying to send a message, but Arthur was certain he had seen this one in particular before. Racking his brain trying to figure out where he had seen this knife before he huffed and turned the weapon over in his hands only to see a small inscription in the handle.

_MB_

What did MB stand for? Tilting his head, Arthur frowned and narrowed his eyes slightly until the barfight suddenly came into his mind.

_A-Arthur watch out!_

_Oh, Myles Black..? That's a long and... Complicated story._

Myles Black... This was the knife he was using that night, and suddenly Arthur's blood ran cold.

"U-Uh, sir..?" Someone asked from behind Vincent, Arthur quickly looked up to see one of the hands.

"For god sake what is it!?" Vincent snarled.

"I-I just wanted to let you know we alerted the sheriff... He's on his way." He replied warily.

It seemed that Vincent seemed to reel himself back in for the moment as he took a few breaths before reaching up and wiping his face for a moment. His eyes were already bloodshot from the sobbing and they still threatened to spill over, but seeming to remember he had to continue on at least for now and he nodded.

"... Thank you, and Johnson?" Vincent asked.

"Yes, sir?" The hand inquired back.

"... Any trespasser is to be shot on sight am I understood?"

"O-Of course... I'll pass it on." The other replied before hurrying out of the barn.

Vincent stared blankly forward at Abraham for a few moments before finally releasing a clear and calmer breath. It had taken immense strength to force his breakdown to stop and now he was just utterly exhausted... Arthur tensed just momentarily at knowing a lawman was going to be coming around soon, however, he looked to the knife in his hand and back up.

"... Vincent." He eventually stated, watching the other lookup with nothing but despondence. "You recognize this knife?" He inquired as gently as he could.

The other's eyes sluggishly fell down to the blade and there were a few seconds of silence. However he reached forward, and even though he hesitated, he carefully took the murder weapon in his hand and pulled it closer. There seemed to be no recollection in his eyes until they honed in on the inscription just as Arthur's had, and he watched his eyes begin to ignite with an intimidating rage that Arthur identified with, however they seemed to simmer unlike his own and he seemed to think rationally, which impressed Arthur to no end.

"I... He..." He muttered momentarily before he quickly handed the knife back to Arthur, unable to hold it any longer.

"Calm down..." Arthur said soothingly. "It's gonna be okay... You want me to go have a chat with him?" He inquired calmly and waited patiently, watching Vincent's eyes briefly run down to the body, and there seemed to be obvious hesitation.

"... The Sheriff'll want it." He muttered knowing Arthur would want the knife for proof, but he seemed unsure, and Arthur nodded.

"... If you want we can wait, but he might take it." He mentioned just in case and Vincent sighed softly.

However, Arthur remembered that Vincent wasn't like him, a hardened criminal who could lie to the law with a clear conscience. He sure as hell knew Vincent wasn't some innocent do-gooder but he _was_ a good man. So he was quick to shake his head and gently squeeze the younger man's shoulder not wanting to put any more stress on him.

"Let's just wait... It's alright." He mentioned, seeing at least a small wave of relief cross the other's eyes and he nodded.

Arthur then stood up and walked around to Vincent's side before offering a hand out to him, he wanted to get out of sight before the Sheriff arrived but he didn't want to leave Vincent hanging. Although he wasn't quite ready to leave his father's side, he looked back down one last time before leaning in and allowing himself to rest his forehead against Abraham's still form.

_Don't you ever do somethin' that stupid again you understand?_

_S-Sorry pa..._

He remembered that conversation clearly after the doctor had wrapped his bandages and allowed Abraham to have a few minutes with him. He remembered a distinct moment when his father seemed to pause and avert his gaze almost bashfully, knowing he wasn't a very sentimental man.

_I-I just... I can't lose you too son... Losin' your mother and Isaac..._

_I love you, pa..._

_... I love you too, son._

Tears quickly formed in Vincent's eyes again and he released a shuddered breath before pulling back. He swallowed harshly before he turned away and took Arthur's hand who hoisted him up, and without hesitation, quickly pulled Vincent into his arms and embracing him tightly.

"... I'm not ready to be alone." Vincent whimpered.

"You ain't." Arthur assured quietly.

"... And then you'll go."

Ouch. Arthur wasn't ready to face that reality yet and for a moment... He was ready to damn everything.

_Well, Arthur, you sure been busy turnin' everyone against me..._

_The only thing I know is you're just like the rest of them as soon as responsibility comes knocking!_

_Why don't you come by my tent later? We can talk then._

_Arthur, John is gone... And if you think holding onto Abigail and that baby is going to bring him back..._

_I rarely see you anymore, I wanted to know what was takin' your time away from **here**._

_You're makin' me nervous, Arthur..._

Did Dutch have a reason to be nervous..? Arthur swallowed dryly and pulled away from Vincent so he could look down at the other. He wanted to so many things, he wanted to assure him that no, he wouldn't be leaving... Or that no matter what Arthur would be there for him to lean on, but he couldn't. However, he looked over to the opening of the barn and when no one appeared he looked back over to Vincent and reached up, caressing one of his cheeks and the other couldn't help but lean into it.

"... The future is a mysterious thing, I'm yours whenever you need me." He replied, knowing there were _a lot_ of things he needed to work out before he could face anything with confidence despite his form feeling stiff as he recalled similar words he had said to someone else in the past.

Vincent looked up to him and released a small breath before he quickly reached up and wrapped his arms around Arthur's neck, hugging him tightly to his relief. Arthur wound his arms tightly back around the other's waist and held him close for a little while.

Arthur was here... Last night... For all he knew, Arthur was the last one to see him alive before he was murdered.

"... I saw him last night." He admitted, watching Vincent pull back and look at him with shock.

"Y-You did? D-Did you see anything or..." Vincent pleaded but Arthur sighed softly.

"N-No... Honestly, I didn't. After we... Well, I came outside to smoke and I heard some noise in here, but it was your father... We had just a normal conversation and he expressed that he was grateful that you made it through the fire and told me that he didn't need me. He was cleanin' up a bit after the workers." He explained and Vincent deflated.

"I-If I had been out here, maybe..." He trailed off, though Arthur shook his head quickly.

"You mighta been killed too... And I wouldn't know what to do with myself if that happened." He mentioned off-handedly, though his words were honest.

Vincent had become a constant in Arthur's life, someone who he had begun opening up to. He was becoming home to Arthur, and that's what he loved about the other... Loved... He really did love that about him. Taking a breath, Arthur quickly remembered to slow himself down. He wasn't ready to love someone else again... He had told himself that vehemently.

"What's worse..? Dying with him or being alone in the end..?" Vincent inquired unusually pessimistic for his usually cheery persona, it made Arthur sigh softly and lean in to rest his forehead against the others for a moment.

"... I'm gonna take care of your chores for today." He then said to take some pressure off of Vincent.

"If I let you do that..." Vincent started to argue, but he suddenly stopped and released an obviously exhausted breath before he nodded. "... Thank you, Arthur." He murmured before Arthur pulled away since they weren't in the safest of places.

It was just convenient that it would keep him away from the sheriff, but he wouldn't be shocked if he'd be interviewed since he was the last once to see Abraham alive, but he truly just hoped everyone else's testimony and the knife would be enough. Looking over to the archway, Arthur then looked back to Vincent before gently wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

"C'mon, partner." He mentioned softly, though affectionately enough for Vincent to lean into him a little more obviously until they got outside.

Arthur ran the night through his head over and over and over again... How could he have not noticed _anything_? It didn't make any sense! Abraham didn't explicitly say there would be someone out to get him, despite having some suspicions behind the motive of the original attack on his home. Arthur thought the other would have said something if he thought he'd be assassinated.

He eventually left Vincent's side so he could distract himself with work and currently, he was shoveling hay from a wagon into one of the corrals that were a little overstocked with cattle at the moment, and despite trying to focus on the work at hand, he was so angry... Angry that Vincent and his family couldn't get a fucking break... Abraham was gruff and distrusting for good reason... But he didn't deserve to die like that, he was a good man.

Growling softly underneath his breath, Arthur shoved the pitchfork thoroughly and impaled the hay pile as harshly as he could to release some of his frustration, only panting softly afterward from the strenuous work, he had been doing it for hours now. However, it was nothing compared to what Vincent was going through right now, scrutinized questioning with a stoned faced lawman... Though perhaps because this place was smaller they would have closer ties that bound them as a community. Arthur hoped that was the case.

However, a small flicker caught Arthur's eye and he turned his head after wiping the sweat off his brow and he furrowed his brows slightly. The sun was beginning to set but he had clearly seen flickering from the east... Turning fully, Arthur looked up into the hills that overlooked the Taylor's property and his eyes carefully scanned the landscape, and for a moment, Arthur wondered if he had seen anything at all, but just before he went to turn his head away, he noted too small little ears poking up and the form that Arthur ended up focusing on chilled him to the core.

_Suddenly I looked across the river and I-... I saw a man..._

_... He seemed to be wearin' some kind of mask, I couldn't see what he looked like... B-But he was aiming a gun at me!_

He was right there... A man... In a mask... Pointing a large caliber rifle at him.

Arthur narrowed his eyes as his form completely froze for a moment while he questioned if he was really seeing someone crouched in the hills aiming at him wearing... What looked like a wolf cranium atop his head with a mask distorting his other features.

For a moment, Arthur analyzed the situation, wondering if the mystery gunman had a connection to Vincent's troubles but he was quick to discredit it due to the fact that Vincent never even found out where he was held up with the gang... So how would this man know?

... Unless he was looking for Arthur.

It was a viable option, he had a large bounty, after all, perhaps the stunt with Abigail was to lure him out and he pulled out when he saw Dutch and the rest of them pile out of the woods behind him... Now Arthur was alone.

He had two choices here... Sit here and wait to possibly be shot... Or act.

Blinking, Arthur's cobalt quickly shifted to his left where he saw The Admiral hitched up to a post not further than a quick sprint away... There was only one way to find out who the man was... By catching him.

Suddenly without warning, Arthur began his dash toward his horse, his eyes still trained over on the man as not to lose him. He could see the other's gun following him, however as soon as he climbed atop of The Admiral... The mystery man seemed to spook and begin his escape, sprinting in the opposite direction.

"Oh no, you ain't." Arthur snarled under his breath and kicked his horse quickly toward the gate.

It would still take a few minutes to get to where the man was pointing the gun at him from, but The Admiral was a fast horse and it looked like the other man was on foot. How bold, Arthur didn't understand. Was he mocking them? Trying to scare them? He was going to find out...

"C'mon!" He snapped and kicked his horse again. "Stop you bastard!" He hollered after the masked man.

Arthur zoomed around the property, doing whatever he could to keep the assailant in his sight. It looked like he was running toward the ridge that overlooked the town, he would be trapped there and Arthur would get answers.

It wasn't long though before the brush and curved hills obscured his vision of his target and it made Arthur curse softly. It didn't matter though, there was no escape, the closer he got to the ridge, the more Arthur frowned as he realized that the man brandishing the large weapon was nowhere to be found... Arthur continued to remind himself that the other had a head start on him, but as soon as the cliff came into sight, Arthur pulled back on The Admiral and gawked around slightly.

There was nothing here and no sight that anyone had been here that Arthur could see. Was he going crazy..?

No... Because Abigail had seen him too, this wasn't a coincidence... But how could he just disappear out of thin air?

Arthur hesitantly dismounted his horse just in case this was a setup, what if he was being lured into a trap? Frowning, Arthur slowly and quietly ventured forward as the sun continued falling from the sky. He carefully approached the cliff of the ridge and peered over, no body at the bottom, so he didn't jump... But where did he go?

* * *

Arthur eventually had to give up the search after about half an hour of searching and once the sun had fallen there was no use in looking anyway... Besides, there was someone else who needed his attention much more.

He wasn't thrilled about giving up on a possible threat, perhaps he would mention it to Vincent at some point just to be safe, but when he got back to the ranch it was quiet... Though not it's usual quiet. It was a somber silence, the air was thick with the fear of the unknown. In truth, the future of the ranch was surely up in the air... He wondered if Vincent would be able to handle the pressure.

However, Arthur felt foolish soon after he thought about it, Vincent was undoubtedly a strong man, smart and he had the guts to get shit done, he didn't mind telling anyone what to do... Just more things to love about him.

Arthur ignored the fluttering in his heart as he rolled back onto the property, he was certain Vincent would be in no mood for fooling around tonight and probably until further notice, but as he got up to the house, Arthur's hand instinctively came up to knock. He was quickly disheartened as he reminded himself it was only Vincent in the house, he didn't really need to hide his coming and going as much anymore.

Frowning, Arthur reached forward and opened the door before poking his head in and looking around. The lights were on but the air was thick with silence and it worried Arthur. He took a breath before slowly venturing inside and quietly closing the door behind him.

"... Vincent? You here?" He called, as not wanting to scare the other with his entrance, but no one responded.

Could he still be with the Sheriff? Surely not, Arthur just walked through the house, looking around but the other man was nowhere to be found. Upon walking into the kitchen, there was a small piece of paper folded in half stationed upon the table, and reaching down to open it up, Arthur tilted his head.

_Barn._

It was sloppily written as if it were scrawled without care... Arthur hummed softly but turned on his heel and began his trek toward the barn across the property. A worry had settled in his gut but when he walked through the archway into the half-constructed barn, Vincent was there... Sitting on the floor leaning against a support beam with the bottle of his father's whiskey in his hand, he'd be sure to ask about his visit with the Sheriff another time.

Abraham's body had been removed but the bloodstain from the events still showed its brutal retelling of his death.

"... Hey, partner." Arthur greeted softly, watching Vincent lull his head up to see him, his eyes were red and puffy but he seemed lucid for now.

"Oh... Arthur... Forgot I left that note for you." He mumbled softly and hung his head once again, it was truly a heartbreaking sight and it made Arthur sigh softly before walking forward.

"You mind if I sit..?" He asked, watching Vincent shake his head lazily before he lowered himself beside the other, he could already see that the bottle was two-thirds of the way empty. "How you doin'?"

Vincent blinked before he turned his head toward Arthur a bit again, he looked utterly exhausted. Eventually, he shrugged and released a small breath as he looked toward the bloodstain on the floor.

"... I just... I couldn't be in there." He mumbled, motioning to the house. "... It felt like they were all starin' at me, them pictures." He slurred, and honestly, it made sense, all of the photographs of his dead relatives, Arthur didn't blame him.

"I get it... You sure that's a good idea though?" Arthur asked delicately, motioning to the booze.

"Figured nows as good a time as any... Hell, bank'll probably get the ranch." He scoffed bitterly, making Arthur glance over at him with a frown.

"What do you mean?"

"Pa took out a loan from the first fire... Ya know the one that killed my ma and brother to rebuild the house... Then he had to add to it for this damn barn... I know we look like we're doin' well but hell... We were barely gettin' by before..." He admitted. "I wouldn't worry about the money so much if I knew what the fuck I was doing... Pa was slowly teachin' me stuff on the whole operation aspect of stuff but... Without him..." He droned before sighing and leaning his head back against the wooden beam.

"You kiddin'? I ain't ever seen someone look so comfortable in their job besides you." Arthur argued.

"Herdin' cattle and brandin' horses is one thing... Managing finances and costs is another..." He added before shaking his head and looking up at the sky through the hole in the roof. "... Had four hands quit today... Said they were sorry but they had families of their own and couldn't afford workin' somewhere so dangerous... And I'm sure more will follow."

Reaching up, Vincent took another large swig of the whiskey, and the more he spoke, the more Arthur's heart ached for him. So much for loyalty... While he didn't know what to say, Arthur scooted a bit closer and wrapped his arm around the other, and gently ushered him close. He wanted to tell him about the man in the mask but... It wasn't a good time for that, Arthur just reached up and ran a hand gently through the other's hair.

"... That feels nice." Vincent eventually commented and leaned into the touch as his eyes fluttered close.

"... Good, don't worry... We'll figure it out." He assured, hearing Vincent snort quietly before lulling his head to peer over, and despite his obviously drunken haze, there was an openness that somewhat disarmed Arthur in Vincent's eyes.

"... Why you doin' this for me?" he suddenly asked, putting Arthur on the spot slightly and watching him clear his throat and scramble to find an answer that didn't embarrass him.

"Is it wrong to wanna do the right thing for someone?" Arthur inquired curiously, watching a small lop-sided smile melt onto Vincent's expression.

"... You're so cute." he stated without care, only causing Arthur's face to heat up like a summer evening.

"You're drunk." Arthur scoffed softly.

"No... I mean you're so cute when you do that." He replied with a small chuckle, confusing Arthur, but the charming sweet smile that adorned his face was hard to argue with. "... When you care but you don't wanna show it... It only makes you look like you like me, ya know." he said matter-of-factly, watching Arthur roll his eyes but smile.

"I think it's pretty obvious I like you, Vincent." He mused since he wondered if Vincent would even remember this conversation in the morning.

"Yeah..?" Vincent asked quietly, making Arthur look back over at him again. "... I think I more than like you." He confessed with a small whisper, making Arthur's face pale into shock but the other just chuckled softly. "It's okay... I'm used to it." He then said, just in case Arthur was sweating and he sure as shit was but not in the way Vincent was probably thinking.

As he reached up to take another drink, Arthur carefully stopped him, taking the bottle from him and taking a swig of his own before putting it aside and without warning, leaning in and pressing his lips firmly against the Vincent's, making him tense only slightly in surprise at the gesture, but he leaned into it quickly and sighed. Arthur was slow to pull away, the liquor on Vincent's lips only drawing Arthur in more but he took a breath and met the argent hues as the fluttered back open.

"... You better get used to me then." He replied simply before brushing his thumb along the other's cheek.

Vincent stared at him in disbelief but when Arthur backed away from him and stood up, he was about to say he didn't think he could stand upright but before he had the chance, Arthur knelt back down and suddenly scooped Vincent up into his arms.

"W-What are you doin'!?" Vincent gasped. "What if someone sees us?"

"You don't wanna be seen with me?" Arthur asked, arching a brow over at the other.

"You know that ain't it." Vincent scoffed with a blush but Arthur soon chuckled.

"Just be still... You could pass for sleepin'." Arthur replied simply.

Vincent opened his mouth to argue but seeing that Arthur began walking he sighed and just got comfortable. He leaned into Arthur and took a breath as his eyes fluttered shut anyway and he breathed in Arthur's comforting scent. He was tired after all...

As he walked, Arthur couldn't help but look around, still feeling eyes on him as he moved. He tried to look for any movement on the hillside but he knew it was too dark there was no way he'd see anything... He just made sure not to linger outside for too long.

> When the sins of my father  
> Weigh down in my soul  
> And the pain of my mother  
> Will not let me go  
> Well, I know there can come fire from the sky  
> To refine the purest of kings  
> And even though  
> I know this fire brings me pain  
> Even so  
> And just the same  
>   
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain down, Lord  
> Make it rain  
> Oh, make it rain  
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain down, Lord  
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain  
>   
> All seed needs the water  
> Before it grows out of the ground  
> But it just keeps on getting hard  
> And the hunger more profound  
> Well, I know there can come tears from the eyes  
> But they may as well all be in vain  
> Even though  
> I know these tears come with pain  
> Even so  
> And just the same  
>   
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain down, Lord  
> Make it rain  
> Oh, make it rain  
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain down, Lord  
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain  
>   
> And the seas are full of water  
> That stops by the shore  
> Just like the riches of grandeur  
> That never reach the poor  
>   
> And let the clouds fill with thunderous applause  
> And let lightning be the veins  
> And fill the sky  
> With all that they can drop  
> When it's time  
> To make a change  
>   
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain down, Lord  
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain  
> Make it rain
> 
> source: [Make It Rain by Ed Sheeran](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNXL_-oLJU8)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys are still enjoying! I know I draw the drama out but I hope it's worth the rollercoaster ride of emotions! Thanks as always for reading!  
> -Eros


	13. The Chase

_This is a bad idea..._

He kept telling himself that.

 _This is... A_ **_really_** _bad idea..._

Arthur was the most vigilant and... If he was being honest, the scariest member of the gang, he even rivaled Dutch in multiple ways, Dutch was more creative with his mind but Arthur, he had sheer brute strength and even John knew that he wasn't stupid, he was much smarter than he let on. So far, he had successfully spied on both Dutch and Hosea while they were conniving in Copper Lake and... They seemed normal, it was painful looking at them and seeing them being so happy, remembering he left that behind.

However, he was doing this for a reason and the triforce of the gang took priority over everyone else, besides he didn't want to risk running into any of them, especially Arthur. John had been planning this for a while now, he timed himself to be in place at a certain time in the afternoon just when the shadow overcast the hillside that peered over where Arthur was supposedly working.

John hadn't seen him since he had spied on Abigail at the river... At first, he wasn't sure that his nerves would be able to follow through with it but he had to be sure that he knew where Arthur spent most of his time.

Kicking Gypsy, John rode up through the hills and ridges of the plains that overlooked Airedale, keeping in the shadows just to be safe. Now that he was a master tracker he was able to map his way through the land almost instantly and remember it for at least a little while and took note of landmarks. His wolf hide clothing had been keeping predators away as of late too, though he wasn't sure how long that would last.

Looking to his right, John noted the town bustling with life, it seemed to be thriving despite its modest size. If he recalled where the Taylor's Ranch was it would be just North of here, and his emergency escape route would be on top of the ridge to the east... But he knew he needed to be sure and map it out perfectly before attempting spying on Arthur.

Turning his horse, John kicked her higher up the ridge and got a better birds-eye-view of the town for a moment before leading her along the forest, but not inside of it. He had to remember...

Eventually, John had to pull back and stop Gypsy as he searched his brain, he had found the hiding place on the ridge... He _knew_ that...

Sighing, John reached up and pulled his hood and mask off so that he could breathe easier and run a hand through his hair tiredly. He had been working almost nonstop since _finall_ _y_ catching up with the gang and so far, besides the unexpected saving of Abigail at the river he had remained anonymous, hell they didn't even try to pursue him. Maybe he was getting worried for nothing? Perhaps he should just abandon the escape route because he probably wouldn't need it anyway, he had no intention of Arthur seeing him.

No... No, there was no such thing as too careful, he had to remind himself of that, especially since he intended on leaving Gypsy in a safe location away from him, he wouldn't be able to run far or fast. Taking out the one materialistic thing he owned, John glanced to the time on his watch and he took a breath, currently, it was about eleven he still had time to look and even if he was late, he hoped to still be shaded no matter what due to the setting of the sun.

Slipping it away into his satchel, John pulled his wolf-pelf hood back over his head and the mask back over his face before kicking Gypsy once again to get her into a trot. It turned out he had just passed it hurrying earlier and when he started backtracking he noted the subtle trail he made to lead him to the crack in the rocky earth surface in the highest point of the ridge.

It was tight, but after doing a little investigation, John had figured there to be a small cavern hidden in the crack in the rock and there was just enough room to slip himself inside... The only problem was getting back out, he hadn't been brave enough to actually jump inside and check it out, but this was an emergency scenario for a reason. Hopefully, he wouldn't need to use it... There was also the problem of how far it was from where he planned to station himself with his gun but that was just motivation for John not to get caught.

Now all that was left to do was hide Gypsy and thankfully with the bordering forest that wouldn't be difficult. By the time he was finally ready to go look for Arthur, it was about three, just on time. Releasing a sigh, John limbered himself up since he'd be doing a lot of crouching and started his descent back toward the ranch carefully, timing himself it wasn't as far as he had originally anticipated from the emergency escape route but it would be one hell of a run. Making his way down, he noticed something immediately off about the ranch, for its size, it looked almost like a ghost town.

Where was everyone..? Pulling out his scope, John started combing over the property carefully, finally finding some farmhands doing their job but it was still inherently quiet. Could something have happened? Was business failing?

John eventually shrugged it off knowing that he wasn't worried about that to begin with, besides the fewer people the faster he'd lock onto Arthur. John didn't really notice at first but as he continued looking over the property he cursed to himself upon realizing his hands were sweating. Why the hell was he so nervous!?

Steadying his breathing, John almost felt better until his sights hovered over a familiar face and his heart stopped as he reeled himself back and focused on the man shoveling hay into the enclosures with a pitchfork, at first John couldn't get a good look and for a moment he thought he may have been wrong but the more he focused... The more it all came crashing down for him. It wasn't easy seeing Arthur the first time but now... Watching him work, watching him be Arthur...

At first, there was a wave of pure regret and longing but it quickly morphed into anger and resentment... However, even though John still felt betrayal toward Arthur, he _had_ done some growing while he was gone and he knew that to blame Arthur entirely for his leaving would be wrong... But it wasn't like Arthur didn't contribute at all either, John had so many conflicting feelings and eventually, he had to take himself away from the scope just to take a breath.

He got what he came for... He didn't really have to stay anymore if he didn't want to... But for some reason, John put his eye back up to the scope, watching Arthur wipe his forehead before suddenly looking in his direction. John suddenly froze, did Arthur see him..? How?

It didn't matter, John couldn't even think straight as Arthur stared right at him, just as Abigail had done prior though this time it was far more nerve-wracking, Arthur seemed to be calm until he suddenly started sprinting, causing John's worry to turn into bewilderment.

"The hell..?" He mumbled in confusion before he followed Arthur's form and watching The Admiral suddenly coming into view. "Oh shit!" He gasped watching Arthur sling himself into the saddle, there was no question that Arthur had seen him, and now the chase was on.

Without another second, John turned on his heel and began dashing up the ridge, praying that he had timed this right and hoping to god that Arthur didn't catch up enough to see his escape.

"Stop you bastard!"

John barely heard it... But it was the first time he had heard Arthur's voice in almost a year, it made goosebumps travel along his skin as fear seeped into his very pores. He couldn't let Arthur catch him... If he did...

Gulping, John panted as he realized his gun was far heavier than it looked and he could hear The Admiral's hooves stomping getting closer. He was so close... When he ran up on the crack in the surface John didn't even look behind him, he nearly threw himself into the hole and hoped he didn't leave any evidence of his withdrawal into it. He was quick to duck to the side against the wall and hid before slapping a hand over his mouth to cease his panting as sweat poured down John's forehead and his adrenaline pumped wildly.

It wasn't longer than ten or so seconds that he heard Arthur's horse near him and stop as John's hands began to tremble, worried that he had been too overzealous getting into his hiding place and left obvious clues about his whereabouts. Listening carefully, he could hear the muffled sounds of Arthur's boots hitting the floor as he dismounted, he sounded like he might have been about ten or so feet away...

John really thought he had been caught until a few minutes passed and he suddenly heard The Admiral retreating... And only when he felt safe did John take his hand away from his mouth and nearly fall back onto his rear, panting as hie adrenaline finally calmed and he took his hood and mask off. That was close... Too close... Glancing up to the light pouring through the crack in the ground above him, John sighed knowing it was going to be a bastard getting out.

* * *

Arthur held Vincent especially close during the night, but like the night before, it seemed that Arthur had slept far deeper than normal, because when his eyes fluttered open and he looked over, Vincent was gone from bed. Frowning only slightly, his hand lazily swept over the blankets, they were cold he must have been gone for a little while at least.

Stretching his body out he wasn't keen on leaving bed yet due to being so comfortable since they were able to undress properly the night before at least he was smart enough to bring in his bag. Eventually pushing himself up, Arthur groaned softly, his shoulder was killing him from hauling the hay off the wagon for hours, he carefully moved his arm around trying to limber it up before changing into his spare set of clothes.

The events of the day previously still bother Arthur as he thought about the masked assailant... How could he have just lost him? More importantly, why was he stalking the gang? Did he work for the law?

Quickly chasing those worries away for now, Arthur reminded himself there was someone else who needed his focus now.

He figured that Vincent had already gone out for work but when Arthur ventured out into the kitchen rubbing his eyes he stopped in his tracks when he saw none other than the man he was looking for sitting at the table with his back to him, he seemed to be leaning his head onto one of his hands and looking down at something, but when he heard Arthur shuffle in he turned. His brows arched momentarily but his surprised look softened.

"Oh, morning." He greeted still a bit blankly from the night before, but his eyes were much more lively today than yesterday.

"Morning." Arthur replied as he continued, though the pleasant aroma that was permeating from the room had been teasing him from the hallway and Vincent motioned to the coffee pot that still steamed.

"There's coffee, mugs are in the cupboard there." He offered, lazily motioning to the cabinet before continuing his stare downward.

"Thanks." Arthur murmured, still half asleep as he trudged to the counter.

Upon opening up the cupboard Arthur took a coffee cup and turned around to the stove before pouring the contents into his mug, the steam gently hitting his face as he did so and already beginning to bring him back from the dead. However, as he turned to the table to take a seat, he paused as he saw the knife that he had retrieved from Abraham's body laying on the table in front of Vincent and it became obvious what he was enthralled in. The sight couldn't help but worry Arthur a bit before he walked forward and pulled out the chair from across Vincent and taking a seat.

The first thing though, as he did with every morning, he took a drink of the bean juice of life before releasing a small breath, but when he looked up he could see Vincent smiling weakly at him.

"What?"

"You drink black coffee?" He inquired with amusement.

"Don't judge." Arthur snorted.

"But how? It's disgusting." Vincent giggled as he took a drink of his own.

"Ya gotta make due when you travel a lot, cream and sugar aren't a priority." He chuckled in response before his eyes settled back onto the blade, and Arthur couldn't help but frown. "... You okay?" He then asked.

The smile fell from Vincent's face quickly as he followed Arthur's gaze down to the knife and he took a long breath before nodding. Setting his coffee mug down, Vincent carefully picked up the weapon and stared at the inscription on the blade.

"... I just... Never thought he could do somethin' like this." He muttered.

"What did the Sheriff say?" Arthur asked.

"W-Well... He said he'd take Myles into custody for questioning after he left yesterday, he told me he didn't need this thing but... I still can't wrap my head around this." He sighed, confusing Arthur slightly.

"Why not..? He sure as hell wasn't opposed to hurtin' you in your uncle's bar." He mentioned with a slight scoff.

"I-I know he's an asshole but... I've known him a long time, I never thought he'd ever do something like this, something just... Doesn't feel right." Vincent explained with a frown as he ran his thumb over the inscription.

"... You mentioned your relationship with him was complicated." Arthur noted somewhat curiously, though he wasn't one to try and insert himself in someone's business if he could help it, which he usually failed at, however, he could see Vincent visually shift anxiously and just the slightest hue of pink cross his face but it was gone as fast as it appeared as he gulped.

"Y-Yeah... I-It's just, I've known him since we were kids... We used to be close but as we got older we grew apart, he became a Black, I became a Taylor... Simple as that if that makes sense, we're competing families after all." Vincent explained somewhat clumsily at first, Arthur could sense there was more behind what Vincent was saying but he relented, it wasn't important after all, what _was_ important was getting his father justice.

"I understand." Arthur replied as he brought his drink back to his lips.

As he swallowed another much-needed drink of coffee, he felt the other's hand gently brush against his own and when he looked up, Vincent wore a much more charmingly optimistic smile. Arthur's heart thundered in his chest like it always did around Vincent and he was just as quick to gently intertwine their fingers casually as he went back to drinking his coffee.

"... I-If you..." Vincent mumbled but stopped, but as Arthur looked back to him, his smile had fallen again and he was staring at their hands. "... I-I would understand if you didn't want to keep working here." He then said, though his voice was soft, scared of the consequences of offering Arthur freedom from this, though he couldn't help but smile a bit at Vincent in amusement.

"... I'm surprised you're sayin' that to a man whose sleepin' in your bed." He said, arching a brow.

"I-I just mean... This is more than you signed up for..." Vincent sighed and looked away, causing Arthur to frown slightly before he sighed as well and stood up and walked around to where Vincent was sitting and offering a hand to him.

The other seemed surprised but he hesitantly reached up and took the hand which carefully hoisted him up, and Arthur's hands didn't wait to relocate onto Vincent's hips when he was standing and pulling him close. Arthur was silent for a moment as he remembered their conversation the night previous and he couldn't help but smile as he recalled how cute Vincent looked despite drunk and out of sorts.

"... You remember what you said to me last night?" Arthur inquired curiously, watching embarrassment wash over Vincent's features at mentioning one of his less than proud moments.

"Well... I remember bits and pieces." He admitted, his face only deepening in color as Arthur released a small but rich chortle as he slowly inched Vincent back toward the table before he reached behind him and carefully slid the knife and Vincent's coffee cup to the side.

Vincent glanced over in confusion as he felt his backside come into contact with the edge of the table and watched Arthur move, but the other man was a professional at sweeping him off his feet... Literally, before he could comprehend what Arthur's plans were, he suddenly reached down and hauled him up a bit, though this time was far more gentle and Arthur was quick to set him down onto the table before taking a step forward and putting himself between Vincent's legs.

The smaller of the two gasped softly and looked up in shock at Arthur but as he leaned in, Vincent's eyes readied to flutter shut but his face stopped just inches in front of his own.

"... How 'bout I refresh your memory..?" He inquired, reaching up and running a thumb over Vincent's lips in admiration and watching the other gulp but nod.

Even though Arthur still felt nervous about this thing between them, he couldn't deny it even if he wanted to, so with a smirk, he leaned over to brush his lips against Vincent's neck just below his ear. He felt Vincent take a breath as his hands resting upon Arthur's chest, feeling the expanse of his muscle structure beneath his shirt.

"... I know for a fact I more than like you, Taylor." Arthur whispered, taking Vincent's breath away for a moment as he desperately tried to reel in his emotions.

"... You know just what to say to put me back together." Vincent chuckled softly before feeling Arthur finally kiss his neck, but he slowly kissed his way back toward Vincent's lips, and just as he leaned in to do so, he stopped once again just shy of his lips.

"Yeah..?" Arthur asked softly, watching Vincent smile sweeter than he had since his life had basically fallen apart before nodding. "... Suppose it's the one thing I'm good at I guess." He mused before Vincent nearly threw his arms around Arthur's neck and forced him closer.

The kiss was not unwelcome in the slightest, Arthur smiled before his eyes fell shut and he reached around to hold Vincent close to him as felt Vincent's lips invite him in for a much more sinful gesture but before things could heat up they were interrupted as always.

_Knock! Knock! Knock!_

Quickly pulling away from one another, Vincent's eyes quickly went into the direction of the living room where someone had knocked on the front door.

"Th-That's probably the Sheriff." he said with a degree of nervousness that Arthur completely understood before he backed himself away and allowed Vincent to hop off the table watching the other quickly walking to get the door after he made sure he was presentable.

While Arthur wanted to hear what the Sheriff had to say, he didn't want to intrude. He just took his seat back at the table casually and went to finish his cooling coffee. Vincent on the other hand opened the door quickly and indeed that Sheriff was standing there.

"Mornin' Vincent, mind if I come in?" He inquired.

"Of course, you want some coffee? There should still be some left." Vincent offered.

"That'd be nice thank you."

Arthur could hear the footsteps walking toward the kitchen and quickly calmed his nerves of facing a lawman. The Van der Linde's had been off the radar for months now he knew he shouldn't worry but there was still a $5,000 price on his head in at least four other states. He just remained casual and when he saw Vincent walk in with an unfamiliar man, Arthur immediately looked over his features, he reminded him of Abraham in the way that he carried himself. The badge shone brightly on the lapel of his jacket.

"Oh, uh, Sheriff Lucas this is a good friend of the family, he's been helpin' me through this." Vincent introduced, and the Sheriff was quick to nod politely to Arthur and hold out a hand to which Arthur stood swiftly and accepted it, shaking it firmly.

"Good to meet you." Arthur greeted before sitting back down while Vincent got a cup of coffee for the Sheriff and when he walked back and held out the mug the Sheriff seemed to sigh in relief.

"Thank you, son." He sighed before taking a much-needed drink.

"What did Myles say?" Vincent then asked, desperately needing to know, however, Arthur was reading the Sheriff's body language and seeing the way paused after swallowing... He was hesitant and Arthur knew not to expect good news.

"... I'm actually much more thankful for the coffee than you think I am, cause me and my deputies been out all night lookin' for him." The Sheriff admitted seriously, and watching all color drain from Vincent's face.

"Then he... He did it, didn't he?" Vincent asked softly with disbelief.

"We still don't know that for sure, but... Given all the circumstances surroundin' your father's death... It's lookin' very possible." The Sheriff replied, making Arthur frown. "We've searched all over the county and come up with nothin'... I'm afraid we've reached a dead-end, Vincent." He then stated with remorse and an apologetic expression.

"... So you're saying that's it?" Vincent asked, his rage from before beginning to surface. "Y-You're tellin' me that there's nothin' else you can do!? That you're gonna let him get away!?" He then barked, making Arthur quickly get up just in case Vincent decided to throw himself at the Sheriff.

"I-I didn't say that, we'll keep lookin' but I got a town to protect Vincent, I can't just leave it to look for Myles Black, you should understand that. I knew your father for a long time and I understand you wanna catch him but I can't stop everythin' just to look for him." The Sheriff explained but Vincent's fists began to tremble.

"... You understand?" He then asked, narrowing his eyes up at the Sheriff. "... You understand." He then repeated before beginning to chuckle and he shook his head, but the laugh was devoid of any humor and he soon shook his head. "Get out." He then scoffed before turning away.

"Now Vincent, I'm sorry I wasn't trying to-"

"Until you've lost everything and everyone that has _ever_ meant _anything_ to you, don't you _ever_ form your lips to tell me that you understand! If you understood you'd be out there catching that man who may have been responsible for killing my whole family!" He yelled. "Now get out of _my_ fucking house." He snarled.

The Sheriff wore a look of complete and utter shock, but it was obvious now that he had overstayed his welcome. He sighed before nodding and placing his coffee cup onto the counter.

"I'll let you know if we catch up to him and we'll put a bounty up for his capture... Truly, I'm sorry, son." He said before seeing himself out.

Arthur took a breath as he looked over to Vincent who seemed to be seeing red, he was _fuming_ and Arthur didn't blame him. He wasn't sure if it was a good idea, but he walked forward and reached out to try and take the other's hand but he was quick to rip it away and turn away as he reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose, desperately trying to calm himself, but he couldn't...

"... They're gonna let him get away, hell, even if they catch him... He won't hang, his father will pay off the Sheriff like always." he sneered as he looked over to the Sheriff's coffee mug and without hesitation he snatched it and hurled it at the wall, watching it shatter into pieces. "Hasn't he forgotten what my father has done for this fucking town!?" he shrieked, making Arthur flinch just slightly with surprise but he remained silent, knowing if anything Vincent needed someone who would actually listen.

However, despite that Vincent was looking away from him, Arthur could see his shoulders begin to shake as he tried to keep the inevitable breakdown from coming, and even though Arthur wasn't sure if Vincent was ready, he quickly approached Vincent and embraced him from behind, only this time he seemed to lean into him for support.

"He helped build this town... And they're gonna just forget about him... Like he meant nothing." Vincent whimpered bitterly, only making Arthur hold him tighter.

Arthur wished he knew words of wisdom but what was there to say in this situation..?

"Arthur." Vincent then stated after managing to take a breath.

"Hm..?" Arthur hummed back.

"... Are you still willing to go have a chat with Myles? I know the Sheriff don't have a clue where he's at but... I-I can't just sit here and do nothing letting him get away with this." He scoffed.

"I'd sure as hell be willin' to try." Arthur assured and feeling Vincent relax a bit before he released him and turned the other around so he could reach up and wipe the tears forming in the other's eyes. "... It kills me seein' you like this." He admitted, watching Vincent chuckle a bit pitifully.

"If my pa were here he'd be tellin' me to man up..." He mentioned, watching Arthur smile a bit before leaning in and catching his lips with a softer and gentle kiss.

"Don't worry about that... Do you have any idea where Myles could be hiding? Anywhere the law might not check..? You said you two were close when you were younger." Arthur said, hoping to get some kind of lead.

Vincent furrowed his brows and thought hard, even closing his eyes as he searched his mind until he gasped softly.

"There's actually one place... On the south road outta town, there's an old farmstead, much smaller than the ones in town... It's broke down and abandoned, the rumor is a witch curses anyone who steps on the property. I know it sounds silly but it keeps people away from it, it wouldn't surprise me if the Sheriff didn't bother checking there, not even kids like to test a curse." Vincent explained.

"Good enough... You mind if I take the knife with me?" Arthur inquired motioning to the blade on the table.

"G-Go ahead... I want it out of my house." The other replied with discomfort.

Now that he had a lead, Arthur wanted to start looking right away, he pulled Vincent close and gave him one last kiss.

"Don't wait up for me... I'll be back as soon as I have something." He promised.

"Be careful Arthur... Please." Vincent muttered with worry.

"Of course." Arthur replied, winking at the other before departing the house.

He would do whatever he could to get ahold of Myles Black, not even Arthur would have pegged him for a murderer... Though he would be sure to keep an eye out for the man in the mask.

> In your eyes, there's a heavy blue  
>  One to love and one to lose  
>  Sweet divide, a heavy truth  
>  Water or wine, don't make me choose
> 
> I wanna feel the way that we did that summer night (night)  
>  Drunk on a feeling, alone with the stars in the sky
> 
> I've been running through the jungle  
>  I've been running with the wolves  
>  To get to you, to get to you  
>  I've been down the darkest alleys  
>  Saw the dark side of the moon  
>  To get to you, to get to you  
>  I've looked for love in every stranger  
>  Took too much to ease the anger  
>  All for you, yeah, all for you  
>  I've been running through the jungle  
>  I've been crying with the wolves  
>  To get to you, to get to you (oh to get to you)
> 
> Your fingertips trace my skin  
>  To places I have never been  
>  Blindly I am following  
>  Break down these walls and come on in
> 
> I wanna feel the way that we did that summer night  
>  Drunk on a feeling, alone with the stars in the sky
> 
> I've been running through the jungle  
>  I've been running with the wolves  
>  To get to you, to get to you  
>  I've been down the darkest alleys  
>  Saw the dark side of the moon  
>  To get to you, to get to you  
>  I've looked for love in every stranger  
>  Took too much to ease the anger  
>  All for you, yeah, all for you  
>  I've been running through the jungle  
>  I've been crying with the wolves  
>  To get to you, to get to you (oh to get to you)
> 
> I've been running through the jungle  
>  I've been running with the wolves  
>  To get to you, to get to you  
>  I've been down the darkest alleys  
>  Saw the dark side of the moon  
>  To get to you, to get to you  
>  I've looked for love in every stranger  
>  Took too much to ease the anger  
>  All for you, yeah, all for you  
>  I've been running through the jungle  
>  I've been crying with the wolves  
>  To get to you, to get to you (oh to get to you)
> 
> source: [Wolves by Selena Gomez & Marshmello](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrbY9gDVms0)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry I've been a little lazy with posting, I've gotten back into Skyrim so I often just get sucked into it for hours and forget to write lmao. Thanks as always for your patience and your commitment to reading my fic!  
> -Eros


	14. Father Knows Best

The ride out of town gave Arthur enough time to think about the events that had transpired over the last couple of days. Things had surely taken a turn that he wasn't expecting since he had gotten there, but for Abraham to die so suddenly and tragically, he wondered what could have happened to cause such a grizzly murder. There was nothing out of the ordinary besides the barn fire since Arthur had arrived.

It only frustrated him further and made him kick The Admiral a little harder since he wanted desperately to find the maggot responsible for the killing. Abraham deserved justice and Vincent deserved closure, he himself had never gotten it for Isaac since he never found out who had killed him, which only furthered Arthur's resolve to make sure no one else had to suffer that same kind of fate.

He continued to parrot Vincent's instructions in his head on how to get to the so-called haunted house and at first, Arthur thought he might have missed it until a rather foreboding structure appeared in the distance. It was dilapidated and looked like any moment it could collapse. It didn't surprise him why people stayed away from it, just the aura alone gave Arthur the creeps as he rolled into the gate. He wasn't someone who believed in superstition a lot, but he couldn't help looking around a bit as he dismounted The Admiral with suspicion.

The first thing he checked was the barn that whistled softly as the breeze gently combed through the hollow interior. There was nothing to be seen nor tracks and Arthur was thorough, but he figured if anyone would be here they'd be held up in the house that seemed a bit more reliable if that was even the proper term for it. As he stalked toward the front door, Arthur leaned in and listened at first just to make sure he wasn't walking in on a party of people.

There was only silence... And for a moment Arthur wondered if this was a waste of time, but he carefully swung the door open with a hand on his revolver before he was met with an empty shell of a living room. There was garbage and ripped rags strewn all over the place, Arthur assumed that drifters often used this place since it was better than being outside, but other than that there didn't seem to be any signs of life here... Until Arthur heard the smallest of creeks coming from the back of the house.

Drawing his guns, Arthur slowly crept forward down the hall, not wanting to alert anyone of his presence, and as he got to the end, Arthur leaned against the wall and listened in as he heard someone... Or something, rifling around in the room next to him.

Without hesitation, Arthur quickly rounded the corner, his gun pointing at the suspected intruder until he looked down and realized he had stumbled upon a startled raccoon. It jumped and hissed before quickly turning on its heel and scurrying out of a hole in the back of the room. Arthur sighed and replaced his gun back into its holster and considered leaving. However, he could feel heat still radiating from a small stove in the corner, making Arthur furrow his brows slightly and walk toward it.

There were embers still inside and they were still warm... Someone had been here, and Arthur must have just missed him. Frowning, Arthur cursed softly under his breath, knowing if he _was_ Myles, the likelihood of catching him was slim... Unless...

No, surely Arthur couldn't requisition help from the gang, this wasn't their affair, and he worried doing so would alert some of his more... Predatory members and he didn't want to risk more harm coming onto Vincent then he had already gone through. It wasn't that he distrusted Dutch, quite the opposite, but it was no secret they were looking for a good score in the area, and despite Vincent's worries about the debt on the ranch, it was _also_ no secret that he was set up nicely assuming he'd be able to learn.

However, there was _one_ person that Arthur trusted beyond all reason of doubt.

* * *

Riding back into camp for the first time in what felt like forever, despite wanting to approach the person he needed to find Myles Black immediately, there was another person he needed to both see and apologize to... And she was scrubbing dishes at Pearson's caravan. Jack was most likely taking a nap at this point of the day, which was probably best. When Abigail glanced up to see him, she was quick to avert her gaze and continue washing dishes, ouch.

Taking a breath, Arthur neared her, though she didn't acknowledge him.

"Hey." he stated, hoping she wouldn't scorn him.

"Arthur." She greeted tensely, though she still didn't look at him.

"... I came over here to tell you I'm sorry I haven't been around so much these last weeks." He stated frowning when she still didn't say anything. "Abigail please I-"

"He called me mama the other day." She mentioned, briefly stunning Arthur when she finally looked over to him, the hurt in her eyes completely disarming him and making Arthur immediately regret coming back here as well as the sheer guilt and devastation of missing Jack's first word.

"... He did, did he?" He murmured, reaching up and rubbing the back of his neck, he could already feel Susan's scathing hot glare on him without having to look.

"What's going on between us, Arthur?" Abigail then asked seriously. "I-I can't keep playing these games, I got a son to raise..." The then muttered less confidently as she looked back to the dishes.

Arthur surely wasn't expecting to have _this_ conversation at the moment... But he knew that was selfish to think.

"... I don't know." He sighed, reaching up and rubbing his eyes. "I-I just-"

"Arthur."

Arthur relaxed, hearing the man he originally came looking for and turning to see Hosea approaching.

"Hosea." Arthur greeted somewhat stiffly.

"I hope I'm not interrupting anything, I was wondering if you had some time to ride with me, you've been gone so I need to catch you up with some things." He explained, and despite Arthur wanting to break away from the conversation he was having with Abigail, he didn't want her to think he was skipping out on her again, he quickly looked back to her speechlessly and unable to make a decision, eventually Abigail sighed and went back to the dishes.

"It's fine..." She muttered.

"... I'll be back as soon as I can." Arthur replied, though Abigail didn't say anything when Arthur and Hosea turned and began walking to their mounts.

Arthur was silent as he and Hosea walked back to their hoses, his motivation for his current task completely overlayed by his negligence for Abigail's feelings. He was _such_ an asshole and no matter what he could never get it right.

"... So why'd you really come back?" Hosea inquired curiously.

"What are you talkin' about? I live there." Arthur replied a bit defensively. "I swear you and Dutch." He sneered quietly, though he was quick to reel in his temper. "Sorry..." He muttered.

"It's alright... I figured you had something important otherwise you'd be back at the ranch considerin' the owner up and died." Hosea replied, making Arthur look over at him.

"You know about that?"

"It was all over the papers this mornin' even in Copper Lake." Hosea replied. "... I figured you could get away seeing how that conversation was goin' but I hope you know you can't avoid it forever." He then explained, making Arthur slightly gawk at him when he realized that Hosea had called Arthur away to spare him.

"Thanks for that... I actually went back lookin' for you... I need a favor." Arthur mentioned regretfully once again.

"Suppose I got enough of those to spare, what do you need?" Hosea inquired.

"I'm lookin' for the man who killed Abraham Taylor, the owner of that ranch." Arthur admitted, watching shock overcome Hosea's features.

"It's not like you to play lawman, Arthur." He commented.

"I know." Arthur scoffed. "But... He was Vincent's father." he mumbled with only slight embarrassment.

"Ah, so you're doin' it for the blonde ranch-hand ey?" Hosea replied almost slyly, noting a warning expression on Arthur's face as he peered over, though he couldn't exactly defend himself when that was _exactly_ why he was doing it.

"Sorta... I mean yes." Arthur clarified. "But it's not all about that... Abraham wasn't a bad man, he didn't deserve to go out like that, and the actual law was useless in finding the man who did it. They basically told Vincent that they were sorry it happened but nothing could be done until he was caught, but of course the fucker ran and they had no intention of actually going after him." He explained. "It's just... They're good people, they deserve justice."

"... Is this the family who lost the matriarch and their eldest son in the fire last year?" Hosea inquired, watching Arthur stare at him.

"Jesus, you do your research don't ya?" Arthur snorted as he began leading them in the direction of the gutted house and hearing Hosea release a chuckle.

"I like to know who my neighbors are and what they're capable of." Hosea replied.

"I also saw that masked man Abgiail was talkin' about..."

"The one that shot the cougar?"

"That's the one."

"Interesting... I wonder who he is. Did you get a better look at him?" Hosea inquired.

"Not exactly, he was pointin' a gun at me on the hillside near the property where I was workin... I tried to confront him but the slippery bastard actually disappeared outta thin air." Arthur sighed with obvious frustration.

"Why didn't you point a gun back?" Hosea chuckled softly.

"And give away that I'm a low-down bandit on the run? I think not." Arthur retorted.

"Fair enough."

Arthur filled Hosea in on the situation with the barfight, conveniently leaving out his romance with Vincent. Hosea had proven support of his life choices but that didn't mean Arthur was comfortable sharing the details yet, if ever. Hearing the interesting and mysterious details surrounding the death of the owner of one of the biggest ranches in the county, Hosea would be lying if he said he wasn't interested either.

"Fool left his knife too huh?" Hosea asked as they stopped outside the abandoned farmstead.

"He did, here." Arthur said, pulling out the weapon and handing it over to the expert.

"It's definitely finely crafted... I'd steal it." Hosea mentioned with a small chuckle but as he looked to the house he hummed. "You sure you didn't find anything?"

"I only found the embers in that stove... Other than that there was nothin' here."

"You think the family could be harboring him?"

"I think if they were he'd been caught by now... But there's no shame lookin'." Arthur replied.

Hosea nodded, but the first thing they did was circle around the house, looking for tracks until something in the dirt caught Hosea's eye.

"... You said you were here an hour ago?"

"Sure was."

"I think these tracks are about that old... The dirt around here is pretty loose, the wind coulda easily taken 'em away if they had been here a while." Hosea noted as they dismounted their hoses and got closer to one of the windows. "The glass is already broken so it's not like you woulda heard him gettin' out unless he was a complete idiot."

It made sense, Myles probably heard Arthur ride up and made the getaway which only pissed Arthur off further since Myles was most likely present when he arrived the first time. Almost feeling the anxiety radiating off of Arthur, Hosea gently clapped his back.

"Don't worry yet... We got tracks at least." He added, pointing in the direction and with Hosea's guidance, Arthur was able to see the subtle indentations still in the dirt, the bastard even had a horse hidden.

"I dunno what I'd do without you, old man." Arthur mused with a small smile.

"Probably decay at the bottom of a ditch somewhere." Hosea snorted.

"I don't disagree with that."

* * *

The tracks were difficult to follow and it took Arthur and Hosea longer than normal to find where they were leading, whoever had left them was obviously trying to lead away whoever might be following them considering the directions they went in were unpredictable and made no sense... But in the end, they lead to an unfamiliar property that Arthur assumed to be the Black's Ranch. It was already getting late and Arthur felt guilty for keeping Hosea out as long as he had, but without him Arthur knew there was no way he would have never found the end of the tracks.

"I can take this from here if you want." He offered.

"You kidding? I want see the end of this." Hosea replied as he and Arthur hid in the treeline near the property. "We can either go now since whoever left those tracks might be still there... Or wait until night when it's safer."

"But if we wait couldn't he get away?" Arthur inquired.

"Well, we can keep watch but there's always a possibility... Hold on look at this." Hosea mused as he looked to the floor. "The tracks abruptly stop... And the brush around here has been disturbed recently, whoever tried to cover his tracks is an idiot." He scoffed.

"Don't doubt it wasn't him..." Arthur mused as he looked and noted the moss near the tree where they were stationed being suddenly got off in an irregular pattern, it was almost obvious to anyone with a little bit of hunting experience. "... Let's see where this goes first." He then decided.

Hosea nodded and took out his binoculars, he could see a few armed guards up northeast near the entrance and one on horseback patrolling the perimeter but he was a ways off, as long as they didn't do anything reckless they would be undetected.

"I think that's doable... Got a lookout at eleven o'clock but he's off in the distance, still we should keep watch out for him. You wanna lead?" He offered, looking to Arthur, who nodded and looked out into the field that bordered the forest.

There was a fence surrounding the property, Arthur and Hosea crouched and cautiously approached it as they followed it along the path laid out to them by their assailant. It seemed to follow the fence for a few meters but eventually stopped where Arthur assumed Myles had jumped the fence, but it was right next to a storage shed... For all they knew, Myles was in there right now.

"Arthur, duck!" Hosea hissed as he suddenly saw a small group of men riding in their direction on horseback from the central house.

Arthur only got a glimpse of them before he quickly diving behind the shed and hoping they hadn't been seen. They weren't trespassing after all so it's not like the others could do anything about it, but it was best not to make their intentions known. Leaning as close as he could, Arthur listened but Hosea gently nudged him and pointed up to an open hopper window.

"Climb over." He whispered.

Arthur opened his mouth to argue, but he didn't have time. He heard the door open and Arthur gulped softly before carefully and as silently as he could climb over the fence, and gently placing his feet onto the ground. He then quickly put his back up against the wall of the shed and looked up to the window that swayed slowly in the breeze.

"Hey, get up. Pa says you gotta go." He heard one of the unfamiliar voices say.

"W-What? Are you serious?"

That voice... There was no doubt in Arthur's mind.

"Very."

"B-But I'm tellin' you! I didn't do it!"

"Lower your goddamn voice!" Another sneered.

"I-I swear... James, George I _didn't_ do it..." Myles begged, he sounded desperate, pathetic even.

"That doesn't matter... There ain't nothin' we can do for you right now until pa can sort this out... You know that, and if you're found here, we will lose _everything_."

There was a pause and eventually a sigh, Arthur couldn't see what was going on but he could tell this was a difficult decision no matter how cold the others were being about it, he could feel the tension in the room.

"... Look, you can stay one more night but that's it, don't you go show your face around the ranch or I swear I'll put a bullet in you myself, got it? Stay _right here_. You need to be gone before first light."

"Alright..." Myles muttered.

"... I'm sorry."

That seemed to be the end of it, without any more words, Arthur heard the door open and shut and for a moment he held his breath... But it seemed like fortune was on his side for once and the men rode off without detecting him. He managed to take a breath as a lightbulb went off in his head, they didn't need to do this now... Since they knew that Myles would be here until dark, there was no reason to stick their necks out any longer.

Arthur approached the fence and hauled himself over carefully again just to make sure Myles didn't hear him before holding an index finger to his lips and motioning back to the treeline. Hosea arched a brow out of confusion but followed Arthur regardless and only when they were in the safety of cover in the pines did Hosea speak.

"He not there?"

"No... He's definitely there." Arthur replied seriously. "I don't know who those men were but... If I had to guess, maybe they were his brothers, they obviously knew each other. They said that he could stay one more night but he had to be gone before the sun came up... Figured we could just wait until everyone was asleep and ambush him, it'll be easy." he explained, watching Hosea process it and smirk.

"Seems easy enough you're right... Did you hear anything incriminating?" He inquired, making Arthur frown only slightly.

"No... In fact, he completely denied it, begged them to believe him... Damn near sounded in tears." He explained, but his judgment of Myles still held strong, he saw what Myles was capable of in the bar despite Vincent's original resistance to believe he was the murderer when they had found Myles' blade.

"Interesting, well we'll see how forthcoming he is when we have a talk with him..." Hosea stated before they got comfortable.

Normally Arthur would doze off in this type of situation but his eyes remained locked on the shed as he leaned back up against the trunk of a tree while Hosea leaned against another one in front of him. All he could think about was the look on Vincent's face when he pulled that sheet off of Abraham... That sheer anguish and devastation... He knew what that felt like for more reasons than one.

Sighing, Arthur finally looked away from the structure only to see that Hosea was staring at him.

"What?"

"Nothin'." Hosea replied with a shrug.

"Stop it." Arthur grumbled, watching Hosea chuckle softly.

"I'm not doin' anything."

"Uh-huh." Arthur huffed before reaching into his satchel and pulled out his journal and carefully flipping through the pages, looking for a particular drawing.

However, he was quick to remember that Vincent had begged him to have it... Arthur could always draw him again anyway, especially now that he had a more... Revealing image in his head of what Vincent looked like... What Arthur wouldn't give to see him naked and sprawled out before him.

Swallowing subtly, he kept flipping until one of his pictures of Jack had his fingers pausing. Once more, Arthur felt himself being torn in two completely opposite directions... Between what was right and who he was. It felt like torture, for the first time in his life, there _was_ a part of Arthur that wanted to be a father. Jack was a cheerful happy baby with the purest personality that Arthur had ever come in contact with, every time he held Jack, Arthur worried that his corruption would seep into him and that he would ruin him before Jack even got a chance to figure life out for himself.

And yet... When Arthur held him... There was a sense of something beyond himself, something greater. He could feel the connection they shared and the way Jack looked up at him with such wonder and glee he often wondered how in the hell he was worthy to get this second chance... But he was ruining it, his _perversion_ was ruining it.

"Arthur." Hosea stated seriously, pulling Arthur out of his head to his relief, he blinked quickly and glanced up.

"Huh..?"

"... You alright?"

Arthur's hands almost started to tremble with the journal in his hands, there was obvious worry in Hosea's eyes and if he could tell Arthur was going through something, he obviously wasn't being subtle about it... And for the first time, Arthur decided to be honest with both himself and Hosea.

"... No." He sighed, carefully shutting the journal and leaning his head back against the tree, Hosea frowned.

"What's goin' on with you Arthur..? You've been... Not yourself for a while now." He muttered.

"Heh, like I would even know what being myself means." Arthur chuckled hollowly as he looked up to the sky through the pine needles.

"Is this about... Victor?" Hosea asked, watching Arthur's eyes cast down at him once again.

"Vincent." He corrected.

"Whatever his name is... Is that what this is about?"

"... Yes and no." Arthur sighed before holding his head in his hands and gently scrubbing his face with them in exhaustion. "I-I just..." He stopped, like always, whenever he felt like he was about to open up about whatever this... Side of him was, upon instinct his mouth shut and he went mute.

He had spent longer than he could remember _never_ discussing this aspect of his relationships... The fact that he had them with men, though Arthur wouldn't consider his prostitutes relationships, John and Vincent were different... They made him feel like he wasn't broken.

"Arthur..." Hosea sighed. "Why do you torture yourself like this?" He asked, watching Arthur's eyes flutter shut as a small smile came over his lips.

"I don't know any other way..." He replied.

When Arthur opened his eyes again, he looked to Hosea's that radiated nothing but worry, fear and... Even love. It felt as if everything at once was giving, he bit his tongue as he felt a ball quickly forming in the back of his throat and tears beginning to sting at the back of his eyes.

"When I'm with him..." He muttered, his voice wavering and weak. "... I feel like I could be happy again, _truly_ happy." He admitted before reaching up and quickly wiping his eyes but the tears just kept forming. "And I _hate_ myself for it."

Hosea's brows rose as he saw Arthur actually breaking down before him, he seemed to be keeping it together barely by a thread. He had begun to wonder how he hadn't seen it sooner, how much Arthur had been suffering.

"I hate myself, because Jack should be enough." He scoffed. "I mean hell, that kid... He's somethin' else." He sighed.

"Sure but he ain't yours... It's normal to love him, but when you don't have that attachment to him, you can't beat yourself up for falling for someone else. He ain't your responsibility Arthur."

There was a long silence as Hosea eventually looked over to Arthur who seemed completely frozen in place. If he really wanted to be honest... He needed to come clean about everything.

"... Yes, he is."

It took a moment, but Arthur could see the slow realization begin to sweep over Hosea's expression, but it was also full of confusion.

"You... Slept with her behind John's back?" he asked completely taken aback.

"N-No... It wasn't like that." Arthur sighed, reaching up and pinching the bridge of his nose as he remembered one of the many reasons he didn't tell a soul, he didn't want to talk about his failure as a man and father. "I met her first... I-In a hotel, she told me she was a workin' girl and... After that explosion with Dutch and John, I went and saw her... Slept with her a couple of times. I-I really started to care about her but..." Arthur paused, once again looking up to Hosea but it seemed like Hosea had figured out.

"... But you wanted John." He muttered.

Hearing it out loud threatened to make Arthur sick, he had to force himself just to simply nod his head. His mouth felt dry and he felt nauseous but at the same time... Arthur could slowly begin to feel the weight beginning to lift from his shoulders seeing as Hosea was being patient and actually listening to him before passing judgment.

"When she started stayin' with us... I knew right away that John was gonna take a likin' to her, hell as soon as he met her he was smitten. I knew it would happen eventually so I just... Let it happen I guess." He muttered, remembering that he was rather preoccupied with Dutch at the time, but he decided to keep that between them two alone. "I-I didn't know she was pregnant or... I dunno. W-When she told me I just... All I could think of was Isaac." He admitted and he could see Hosea's look soften across from him.

Hosea remembered that time... When Arthur came back to camp way earlier than expected and looking completely and utterly empty. It scared the hell out of him and Dutch alike and it didn't surprise Hosea to find out what happened seeing how it had changed Arthur.

"I... I asked her to hide it... To put it on John cause he was the only other person who coulda been..." he admitted shamefully gritting his teeth for a moment as he felt another wave of raw emotion hit him. "In the end... It was probably my fault John left. I'm sorry... Sorry for fucking everything up."

"That's enough!" Hosea suddenly barked, actually shocking Arthur who jumped and stared at Hosea with nothing but fear, but he calmed quickly and looked around to make sure he didn't draw attention before taking a breath. "... John leaving was _not_ your fault." He grumbled, watching Arthur compose himself and look at him with confusion. "If John was a man... Even if what you did was wrong... If John actually took what Dutch and I taught him to heart, he never would have run like that... Like a coward." He explained, watching the relief flood Arthur's expression as he looked down to the floor.

Hosea sighed before he stood up, carefully brushing himself off before he reached down and held out a hand for Arthur who glanced up with surprise before he hesitantly took it and hauled himself up. Without realizing his intention, Hosea suddenly pulled Arthur into a tight embrace. It was unlike Hosea to be this affectionate and for a moment Arthur stood rigid and unsure of how to respond but he slowly relaxed and eventually, his arms came out to hug the Hosea close as well.

"... I had no idea." Hosea muttered softly, sounding nothing but remorseful, after all with how close he and Dutch were with Arthur, how could they not see how tormented he was?

As the words registered Arthur suddenly felt like he was a boy again... It wasn't long after he had joined Dutch and Hosea, he remembered having a panic attack when they were late getting back from a hunting trip, he was convinced they had left him behind like his father. When they finally returned Arthur had withdrawn from them and refused to trust them, it took weeks for them to realize the major error they had made being as late as they were and their negligence had hurt Arthur beyond the norm and when he finally confessed that his father had just abandoned him one day without warning... He remembered Hosea embracing him... Just like this.

_I had no idea..._

Even those words... Hosea probably didn't remember it but for Arthur... It felt like yesterday all at once and he had to pinch his eyes shut to keep the last of his tears at bay, but despite feeling his shoulder becoming damp, Hosea didn't move a muscle except to cradle the back of Arthur's head with one of his palms.

"... Never apologize to me for who you are, son." Hosea then stated seriously.

Arthur swallowed harshly as the realization came that he had _desperately_ needed to hear that one way or another. He never would have expected it from Hosea, or anyone for that matter... But he had felt so much shame for so long for loving John because when they first got together, hell John was still a kid in Arthur's eyes, he still hadn't experienced what it was like to fall in love with another person and he felt that he had forced that upon John even though leaving him was the worst mistake of Arthur's life.

By the time he finally realized his true feelings for John, that he was in love with him, he had already begun falling for Abigail. The guilt of still wanting to be with John ate Arthur alive on a daily basis after how much he had hurt him, he didn't deserve John's love, and when he finally got it back... Arthur shoved his responsibility onto him.

All his life, Arthur always felt that his longing for men, his insatiable impulses, were nothing but a means to hurt others or be hurt and he felt nothing but resentment toward himself for it but now... His heart yearned for only one person. He knew it would take a long time to condition himself differently, to feel more than shame, but... His time with Vincent was short, why hold himself back anymore?

Pulling back, Hosea took ahold of Arthur's shoulders firmly and looked to Arthur's face that had all but dried from the few tears that he had shed but his eyes were still bloodshot and vulnerable.

"... I would say you're a son to me but... You're much more than that. Let's catch this bastard." He encouraged.

Arthur took a slow and even breath before he nodded and finally offered a smile to Hosea. He had no idea where he would be without him... And the next sketch that went into his journal was none other than the man that soon began snoozing in front of him when they finally sat back down.

* * *

_**Hey guys PLEASE** _ _**check out this[AMAZING fanart by hannahhbal on tumblr!](https://www.tumblr.com/reblog/627062501634375680/vWe8OK6s) MY HEART IS FUCKING WEAK RN FROM IT.** _

_**If you like it also check out[her website](https://www.hannahcollette.com/) she does some amazing art! Thank you so so so much again my heart is thROBBING RN. ;-;** _

_**As always guys thank you so much for reading I hope it's been worth the wait and drama! <3** _

_**-Eros** _


	15. Truth Hurts

Time ticked by slowly for the pair of renegades that sat peacefully underneath the trees that bordered the property, but eventually, night seemed to fall and with the darkness, the busy ranch before them quieted down a great deal and like before there were only a handful of guards if that. They seemed to be more like scouts if anything, Arthur observed them with his binoculars only to see that they carried a sidearm and a varmint rifle. It was still a gun nonetheless, which meant they had to be careful but as the moon shone in the sky, Arthur and Hosea stood and stretched a bit after laying low.

"You ready?" Arthur asked.

"As I'll ever be... Are you?"

"Sure am."

"How do you want to go about this?" Hosea then inquired.

"Well... I figured we can catch him pretty easily off guard but... We should probably silence him and get outta here quickly. Don't wanna get caught nabbin' him." Arthur replied softly, watching Hosea nod.

"You're better suited for things like that... We should try to get some information if we can but if worse comes to worse just hit him hard enough to make him cooperate. I'll keep a lookout for guards." He explained.

With one last quick bob of his head, Arthur and Hosea began creeping steadily toward the storage shed that contained Myles Black. Arthur prayed that they wouldn't regret not going to grab him earlier but there was no way he could have escaped without being noticed by either Arthur or Hosea. He just breathed slowly and once hopping the fence, made sure the coast was clear before quickly rounding the corner to begin pushing the door open slowly, a hand on his revolver just in case.

It seemed that Myles wasn't expecting them, there was a light flickering to Arthur's right and as he carefully walked inside, he turned to see the man he had been hunting... Crouched on the floor and shoving things into a bag, it seemed they had acted just on time. When Hosea got inside he glanced at Arthur before pushing the door shut behind him.

"I know, I know... I'm gettin' outta here you don't gotta hound me." Myles huffed softly, however as he heard the distinct _click_ of a revolver's hammer sliding into place, he froze for a moment before slowly turning only to pale at seeing Arthur.

"... Afraid you're outta places to run, partner." Arthur replied cooly as he pointed his gun at Myles.

"Shit..." Myles muttered. "M-My brothers will come to check soon ya know... If they catch you-"

"If they catch me they'll do what..? Continue to harbor a wanted man?" Arthur inquired seriously, narrowing his eyes and watching Myles begin to realize he was out of options, he gulped.

"L-Look you should know... I-I didn't kill him." Myles then said.

"Oh... You didn't huh. I guess that means we're all settled here." Arthur mused before putting his revolver away as Hosea just casually glanced out the crack of the door, staying silent. "Oh... Except for one thing..." Arthur replied before beginning to walk toward Myles who also began to back up.

However, he stumbled over a stool, giving Arthur the advantage but as he stood over Myles who stared up at Arthur with fear, he pulled out Myles' own knife... He held it up in the air for Myles to see before angling the point down and simply dropping it, watching Myles jump as it came _very_ close to stabbing his groin.

"How the fuck did _this_ get there?" he snarled, watching Myles look down, his eyes morphing into pure shock.

The look was so genuine it almost stunned Arthur himself, however as Myles slowly reached forward to take the knife, out of instinct, Arthur foot slammed down on top of his hand, forcing a pained cry to echo out in the shed, but Arthur was quick to punch him roughly.

"Keep your mouth shut." He sneered before glancing to Hosea who, after a moment of observing the outside, nodded back to him that the coast was still clear.

"L-Look... Please..." Myles begged, his other hand coming out to pathetically grasp Arthur's ankle. "I-I swear I... I'm bein' set up... Please, you gotta believe me... E-Even if I was an asshole to Vincent I-I never would have... H-He's asked me to do crazy stuff before but I never would have killed Abraham..." He rambled, piquing Arthur's interest.

"Whose asked you to do what?" He asked, but when Myles stayed silent, Arthur scoffed before releasing Myles's hand only to kick him onto his back roughly. "If you want any chance of proving you ain't the monster Vincent thinks you are... I'd start talkin' partner." He growled.

Arthur knew it was smart just to tie Myles up and take him into custody... But if he wasn't willing to talk now what made Arthur think he'd talk to the law? He seemed apprehensive in a way that worried Arthur... This was starting to become bigger than just a simple family rivalry, in all truths it had already exploded once Abraham was killed.

"I-I..." Myles mumbled as Arthur readied another hit but he quickly shielded his face. "I-It was Jackson!" he yelped, making Arthur's form completely freeze up. "I-It had to be!"

"... What?" He asked, furrowing his brows down at the cowering man beneath him. "Y-... You're tryin' to tell me his uncle set this up? Do you think I'm a fool?" He spat.

"I-I swear on my families lives!"

"Ironic considerin' that Vincent is the one who's had to lose his family isn't it?"

"L-Look, please... Please just listen to me... H-He ain't as innocent as he looks. Remember _you_ ain't from around here." He stated, watching Arthur simmer his temper for at least a moment. "I-... I honestly don't know about what happened with the fire last year... The one that killed Maureen and Isaac. Before, Jackson would pay us behind Abraham's back to supply him with quality whiskey because Abraham always thought we had somethin' to do with it, but I _swear_ we didn't. I'd sooner take the blame than my whole family."

"You just might, get to the point." Arthur grumbled.

"R-Right..." Myles muttered. "Word is when Abraham solely inherited the ranch, Jackson went nuts. Told everyone, my father included, that Abraham had usurped their parents right under his nose and said that Abraham had done it all to have the ranch to himself. I-It wasn't long after that, he disappeared, left town completely. No one saw or heard of him for years until one day he just turned back up..." Myles explained and Arthur would be lying if he said he wasn't interested. "He seemed different once he had the bar, like he had a purpose ya know..? Well... I-It was only after the fire that killed Maureen and Isaac that he started buying whiskey from us, we thought the timing was a little odd but it made sense considering Abraham was convinced that we had done it. Why would he betray his brother openly over some whiskey?" He asked but sighed.

"How do you know all this..?"

"Well... I mean, Vincent and I were pretty young when it happened but it was big gossip of the town... So much so that Vincent lost a lot of our friends because they wouldn't let up about it... Said his family was crazy. I was the only one who stood by him... Until I didn't." Myles muttered as he carefully sat back up and cast his eyes down at the blade. "... Hell, I was the one who set fire to the barn." He admitted.

"What?!" Arthur snapped reaching down and snatching ahold of Myles' collar and yanking him up a bit. "Vincent almost died you stupid fuck!"

"J-Jackson paid me to!" Myles squealed quickly to avoid another hit, and when Arthur hesitated he released a small shuddered breath before continuing. "L-Look I... I swear I didn't know... I-If I knew Vincent would have gotten caught up in that I-I never would have! I didn't realize that was his plan I swear! A-All I was told was the guards' schedule and the location of the dried up feed on the loft... I-I asked him I promise! I asked him if anyone would get hurt and he told me he was just trying to send a message I swear to god."

Arthur huffed softly as the rage evaporated off of his form, wanting desperately to hit Myles again and again for causing that stress on Vincent's father before his death as well as nearly killing Vincent himself but... Myles' eyes, they weren't lying and Arthur knew that only pissed him off further.

"... Why the hell would Jackson defend us in the bar when you were being a prick if he was trying to oust Vincent and his father?" Arthur questioned.

"W-Why wouldn't he? If he didn't Abraham would have raised hell... L-Look I... I didn't even know what I intended on doin' when I pulled out the knife I... I was just mad because..." Myles trailed off and bit his lip. "It's not important I guess... I shouldn't have done it anyway."

"... There's one thing you're forgetting." Arthur growled softly, not willing to spare any pity Myles, it was then that his foot rested back onto the hilt of the knife that sat on the floor before slowly sliding it toward him a little. "... How did this get into Abraham's back?"

"... I don't know. A-After I found out what happened to Vincent that night at the bar, I confronted Jackson the next mornin' before he opened up. He told me there were always risks to that kind of job and that I needed to harden up if he was to continue payin' me for harassin' Vincent and his father... I-I told him no... Not anymore, not with the way things were goin'. It wouldn't surprise me if he had gotten it then somehow, he's a crafty old sonuvabitch. He did bump into me..." Myles sighed slightly in defeat.

"... It sounds pretty convenient if you ask me." Hosea suddenly chimed in as he took a few steps forward before glancing over to Arthur. "We've already taken too much time here... It's your call but... This seems really convoluted, even if the things he said about the uncle's past are true."

"Look, he probably planted my knife to keep me from tellin' anyone! He wanted to get me before Vincent could catch onto him! Please! You have to protect him from that man! I-If he killed Abraham he won't stop there!"

"The only thing he needs protection from is from people like you..." Arthur snarled softly before throwing one last punch and finally knocking Myles unconscious.

Arthur huffed softly once the other's rambling had finally stopped but it didn't change the nagging Arthur felt within him that something was off about this situation. He sighed and looked down at Myles form before Hosea glanced over.

"Well... That was unexpected." He mumbled.

"You're tellin' me..." Arthur sighed, knowing that this would only confuse Vincent further, but he knew Vincent was smart and would see through any bullshit, though that didn't mean that this wouldn't hurt him.

"... What are you thinkin'?" Hosea inquired.

It took a moment as Arthur thought about the question, what did he think anyway? Technically, Myles' retelling of what happened wasn't impossible but... He also didn't see Jackson being that vindictive or straight up malicious, but he had only met him once. Arthur took a breath before reaching up and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I'm thinkin' this is gettin' old..." He muttered before shaking his head and shrugging. "We should go though... You're right, we've wasted enough time here."

* * *

It didn't take long for Arthur to tie up Myles' hands and feet together and get him off the property with Hosea in tow. The older man was kind enough to offer to ride with Arthur at least back to the main road just to make sure they weren't followed but once they were alone, he nodded to Arthur.

"This is probably something you should see through on your own... Tell me what happens later?" Hosea asked.

"Sure and... Thank you... For everything." Arthur replied seriously, meeting Hosea's gaze and watching the other smile proudly.

"You did most of the work..." Hosea replied but sent a small subtle wink to Arthur for their private conversation before turning his horse around and kicking him in the opposite direction toward camp.

For a moment... Arthur actually considered taking Myles straight to the Sheriff, he didn't want the other to pollute Vincent's already broken mind with lies that would just make this whole situation harder for him to get passed, but that wasn't his call to make. He knew that doing that, he would be betraying Vincent who desperately needed to face Myles himself, so with one last silent prayer, Arthur began kicking The Admiral toward the ranch that had begun to feel like home.

The ride didn't take much longer than fifteen or twenty minutes, and with every step, Arthur hoped this wouldn't be a mistake. He didn't even know what time it was, but this couldn't wait either, once he rode through the quiet gates, Arthur pulled around to the back of the house where Vincent's window was, the lights were off and Arthur figured he was asleep but he dismounted The Admiral and approached the window before gently rapping on the glass to start.

It didn't surprise him that Vincent didn't wake up right away, but as he continued knocking, eventually the light brightened the curtains that shielded the room from view. After a few moments, a slightly dazed Vincent peeked behind the curtain only for his eyes to pop open and quickly open the window.

"A-Arthur? What are you doin'? Why didn't you just come through the-"

"I got him." Arthur replied, cutting Vincent off who gawked at him. "He's knocked out but... I got him." he stated again a bit gentler.

"... I'll take care of that." Vincent muttered. "Bring him around front." He ordered before withdrawing from the window and shutting it behind him.

Arthur did as he was instructed, walking The Admiral around to the front where the porch light had been turned on. He then slung Myles back over his shoulder so that he could lay him out on the floor on his back. It wasn't longer than a few minutes that Vincent walked out, a rather cold expression on his face as he carried a bucket and without hesitation throwing the water that filled it onto Myles as Arthur casually walked over to the stairs that lead to the front door and sat down, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it as Myles sputtered and coughed until his focus returned and realized was standing above him.

"Vincent..." He mumbled barely above a whisper.

"That's right you son of a bitch." Vincent growled.

"P-Please! Didn't he tell you? I didn't do it!" Myles pleaded.

"That's rich coming from you... The one who ran when your fucking knife was found in my father's fucking corpse!" Vincent screamed.

"I didn't know! I swear! Please tell him! Tell him what I told you!" Myles begged to Arthur who sat silently until Vincent turned to him with a hard look on his face, he sighed before standing up and approaching, standing next to Vincent as he glared down at Myles after flicking his fresh cigarette away.

"... Tell him yourself, what _you_ did." Arthur growled, narrowing his eyes as he recalled the barn fire and watching Myles shrink up a little.

"W-What? Will someone fucking fill me in!?" Vincent snarled as his ignited silver bullets locked back onto Myles.

"V-Vincent I..." Myles mumbled before swallowing harshly and averting his gaze out of shame. "... Your Uncle Jackson... He paid me to burn your barn down." He admitted.

Vincent looked truly dumbfounded as he took a step back staring down at Myles with disbelief. The anger completely replaced with shock.

"It... It was you..?" He asked quietly.

"Th-That's all I did! Honestly! I-I told him I wouldn't do anything for him after-"

Without warning, Vincent lunged forward, landing his own punch at Myles' jaw. It became apparent really quickly that Vincent didn't resort to violence often because as soon as he landed his punch he hissed and held his fist with his other hand as pain radiated through it but he didn't falter as he glared down at Myles.

"... You expect me to believe that?" he then inquired.

"V-Vincent, please! You know that he's always been unstable-"

"You say one more goddamn word about my family..." Vincent seethed before pulling out his own gun that he had brought out and pointed it down at Myles' head. "... Give me a reason to shoot you Myles." He encouraged.

"Whoa, whoa..." Arthur quickly intervened before he reached up and gently rested his palm upon the hand that held the gun. "C'mon now... He ain't worth it." Arthur cooed softly to Vincent. "You ain't a killer."

"... But he is." Vincent snarled before his thumb pulled the hammer back on the revolver, Myles stared up in complete disbelief, fear radiating off his form as he shriveled up and met Vincent's eyes.

However... Vincent's hand began to tremble and tears began to fill his eyes before he lowered his gun, his free hand coming up to cover his eyes before he turned away. A sob erupted from him as he felt his heart being ripped apart.

"... Goddamn you, Myles." He whimpered, sounding so broken that it pained Arthur to listen, but he slowly stepped back once again to give him space. "... Why did you have to do this to us?" He asked, and tears actually began to fill Myles' carob hues as he looked up at Vincent's form. "Wasn't ruining me once enough for you!?" He shouted as he whipped back around to see Myles' face.

"I-I... I wish that I... I know that nothin' can change what I did... But please... I didn't do it, I-I swear-"

_**BANG.** _

Both Arthur and Myles jumped as Vincent pulled the trigger, the bullet had whizzed by Myles' head, narrowly missing him, and when Myles looked back up to Vincent's eyes they were cold and unfeeling as they glared down at him, still streaming with tears.

"... Remember this moment. Because I won't miss again." Vincent promised before turning his head to Arthur. "... Let's get him to the Sheriff... I'm done with him." He muttered before beginning to walk away.

"N-No! Please! Vincent, come back, I didn't do it!" Myles yelled after him, but Arthur was quick to deliver another sleep giving blow, though this time he'd probably be out for a couple of hours.

However, Arthur's eyes followed Vincent's form as he sank down onto the steps where Arthur had sat down the first time and he didn't hesitate to follow. Vincent looked despondent and it wasn't surprising, he quickly sat down next to him, but thankfully Vincent was quick to lean into his embrace as Arthur wrapped an arm around him and pulled him close.

"... I thought you should hear it from him." He muttered softly.

"I understand... Just... Thank you for bringin' him." Vincent sighed as he reached up and wiped away the last of his tears.

"I almost didn't." Arthur admitted. "I just... Knew this would hurt." He said before looking over to Vincent who smiled weakly in return.

"Well... Thank you for not shielding me from it. I just can't believe he tried to play me again." He said honestly, Arthur was quick to nod in response before leaning in and kissing Vincent's lips despite the position they were in, it was the middle of the night anyway, no one was up when he pulled away, Arthur just took a breath since he always had to control himself around the other no matter the circumstances.

"... I adore you." Arthur admitted seriously as his free hand came out to caress gently over Vincent's cheek who giggled softly.

"Back'atcha." He replied sweetly before leaning in and kissing Arthur one last time before looking back to Myles' limp body in the middle of his drive before releasing a small breath of hesitance. "Suppose we should take care of this... I can't wait to rub it in the Sheriff's face." he grumbled as he stood up and held out a hand for Arthur who couldn't help chuckling in reply.

"Remind me not to get on your bad side..." He mused before he took the offering and stood back up.

"Arthur." Vincent muttered as he began walking towards Myles, stopping him in his tracks and forcing him to turn and see the nervous expression the other adorned. "... Thank you." he said.

"Of course..."

"No... No I mean really... Thank you. A-After everything you've done for me and my family you..." He mumbled and averted his gaze. "... I don't deserve this." He sighed.

It felt like a jab in Arthur's gut to hear Vincent say he didn't feel deserving of this when in reality it was Arthur himself who deserved _none_ of Vincent's affection. He wanted to come clean about who he really was at that moment... But he just approached Vincent again before carefully urging him closer by his hips and feeling his heart flutter as he watched Vincent instinctively wrap his arms around his neck.

"... I've killed before." He confessed, watching shock wash over Vincent's expression. "... Sometimes not always for good reason." He added with a small sigh before looking away himself, worried that this would drive Vincent away, but if it did he would be protecting him. "... If it's anyone whose undeservin' of any of this... It's me." He stated as one of his hands came up to gently surf through Vincent's blonde locks.

"Is that true..?" Vincent asked softly, making Arthur actually gulp nervously before he nodded.

The other blinked, obviously processing what Arthur had said, but it began to make sense. Arthur's natural ability for physical confrontation, how he was able to find Myles so easy, and drag him back for judgment, it made sense now. However, Vincent met Arthur's eyes again as he took a breath, the other's scent comforting him greatly.

"... You still the man that accepted my drink in the bar?" He asked softly.

"Always." Arthur replied without a fraction of doubt.

"... Then that's all I need to know." Vincent muttered before pulling Arthur close and kissing him fully and passionately.

Arthur released a sigh of relief into the kiss and nearly pulled Vincent off the ground for a moment, but recalling the actual task at hand he managed to pull himself back, catching his breath momentarily before turning back to look down at Myles.

"... You want me to take care of this?" He offered.

"You kiddin'? And miss the look of disbelief on the Sheriff's face? Not on your life." Vincent chuckled before unraveling himself from around Arthur, but the smile disappeared quickly as he remembered the situation before him. "... You know... For a minute I almost believed him."

"Me too... C'mon partner."

* * *

It was around three o'clock when they arrived at the Sheriff's department, the deputy assigned there was snoozing peacefully when Arthur and Vincent showed up on their horses. The poor guy didn't even know what was coming and when Arthur walked in with none other than Myles Black with Vincent Taylor in tow the man nearly fell out of his chair. Only after numerous apologies to Vincent did he send the other officer available for duty that night to go fetch the Sheriff out of his house.

Arthur had to admit, the look on the Sheriff's face was indeed priceless, almost beet red as Vincent tore him a new one. The fact that it had taken Arthur barely a day to find Myles after an all-out manhunt was embarrassing. Arthur stood outside yawning as he smoked a cigarette, hearing the door swing open.

"And I can guarantee you that it'll take a hell of a long time before you're in my good graces again, Lucas." Vincent sneered before slamming the door behind him, not even bothering to use the Sheriff's title just to make a point of the respect he had lost during this ordeal.

"Damn." Arthur chuckled softly. "I'd hate to be him right now." He mused.

"Yeah and I bet he does too... Despite me being the last surviving Taylor, my name _does_ carry a little weight around here... And I'll be sure to let people know of his failure." He scoffed before shaking his head.

Arthur had to admit, Vincent was so goddamn sexy when he commanded a room. He couldn't help but smile with pride and when the other noted the look he arched a brow.

"What?"

"... I can't say." Arthur chuckled softly since they were right outside the Sheriff's office, but he swung an arm back around Vincent's shoulders and beginning to walk them back toward their horses. "But what I will say is you sure know how to get a man's attention." He purred quietly, making Vincent blush.

"Yeah like I wanna attract men like you." He teased.

"Whoa ouch!" Arthur laughed as Vincent leaned into the hold once again.

"I'm kiddin'... You wanna come back with me to bed..?" He asked softly, and Arthur's first response was hell yes... But before he could do that...

_What's going on between us, Arthur?_ _I-I can't keep playing these games, I got a son to raise..._

_... I'll be back as soon as I can._

"I want to but..." Arthur sighed and frowned as he pulled away, looking back to Vincent with an apologetic expression. "There's something I gotta take care of... Forgive me?" He asked.

"You know I always will... It's alright, Arthur. Is everything okay?" Vincent inquired, watching Arthur groan softly but nod.

"Yeah just... Family drama." He muttered.

"Well, you'll know where I'll be... Will I see you tomorrow?"

"Hopefully but no promises, I'll be back soon though, I promise." He assured before he climbed on top of The Admiral and sent one last smile to Vincent before he turned his horse in the opposite direction of the ranch.

However, the smile soon fell as Arthur realized what he would be doing... He would be breaking Abigail's heart and shattering whatever chance he had of being Jack's father... But that's what he wanted, right? He never wanted the responsibility of a child and even if he wanted it now, this thing between him and Vincent wasn't going away, it was getting stronger and stronger by the day and Arthur knew it wouldn't be much longer before he could no longer hold himself back. He didn't want to betray Abigail any more than he already did... She didn't deserve that.

Arthur kept trying to find excuses _not_ to break his trust with Abigail but he knew excuses would only last for so long, he had already made a mistake by tethering her to him in the first place. He should have laid out the rules in the beginning and he _never_ should have started sleeping with her again... But of course, he had to think with the head between his legs and not the one that counted. Abigail deserved so much better than him... It was just fate's cruel joke to make her mother a child with him and to make Arthur believe it could truly work... But life wasn't fair, it never was.

Fighting himself for the rest of the ride back to camp, Arthur dismounted when he got close, not wanting to risk The Admiral waking anyone up by thundering back into camp in a hurry. It was still early in the morning, the sun still wasn't up yet but Arthur took ahold of The Admiral's reins and walking the rest of the way back to camp at a leisurely pace. He was tired... And Arthur would make sure to sleep in his own tent from now on, but something caught the corner of Arthur's eye, making him stop in his tracks and look to his left...

And there he was... Right fucking there... The man in the mask...

He probably wasn't even much further than maybe twenty feet away, but he was right there... Observing the camp from the outskirts in a crouched position while everyone slept. Arthur wouldn't let him get away this time...

> When the days are cold  
> And the cards all fold  
> And the saints we see  
> Are all made of gold
> 
>   
> When your dreams all fail  
> And the ones we hail  
> Are the worst of all  
> And the blood's run stale
> 
>   
> I want to hide the truth  
> I want to shelter you  
> But with the beast inside  
> There's nowhere we can hide
> 
>   
> No matter what we breed  
> We still are made of greed  
> This is my kingdom come  
> This is my kingdom come
> 
>   
> When you feel my heat  
> Look into my eyes  
> It's where my demons hide  
> It's where my demons hide  
> Don't get too close  
> It's dark inside  
> It's where my demons hide  
> It's where my demons hide
> 
>   
> When the curtain's call  
> Is the last of all  
> When the lights fade out  
> All the sinners crawl
> 
>   
> So they dug your grave  
> And the masquerade  
> Will come calling out  
> At the mess you made
> 
>   
> Don't want to let you down  
> But I am hell bound  
> Though this is all for you  
> Don't want to hide the truth
> 
>   
> No matter what we breed  
> We still are made of greed  
> This is my kingdom come  
> This is my kingdom come
> 
>   
> When you feel my heat  
> Look into my eyes  
> It's where my demons hide  
> It's where my demons hide  
> Don't get too close  
> It's dark inside  
> It's where my demons hide  
> It's where my demons hide
> 
>   
> They say it's what you make  
> I say it's up to fate  
> It's woven in my soul  
> I need to let you go
> 
>   
> Your eyes, they shine so bright  
> I want to save their light  
> I can't escape this now  
> Unless you show me how
> 
>   
> When you feel my heat  
> Look into my eyes  
> It's where my demons hide  
> It's where my demons hide  
> Don't get too close  
> It's dark inside  
> It's where my demons hide  
> It's where my demons hide
> 
> source: [Demons by Imagine Dragons](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFQYaoiIFh8)


	16. Pack Mentality

_C'mon Trelawny, you can't ignore me forever._

_I can and I sure shall my dear boy._

_But something serious is goin' on! I need your help._

_Interesting, I'm sure Dutch could have used your help all these months you've been gone._

_... Alright I earned that, I ain't sayin' I don't deserve your cold shoulder but... I think that if we don't explore this-_

_My cold shoulder? My dear boy, you don't understand... I'm trying to save your life._

John remembered how much that statement shuddered him all the way to his very core.

In all honesty, at this point given what Trelawny had told him currently, there was still no guarantee that he wouldn't just be shot on sight since he was a deserter... Maybe even as bad as a rat. He recalled the first time he had met none other than Josiah Trelawny just months prior. He was almost more slippery than the gang itself who had which almost vanished from the map completely at the time and it wasn't like him to send messages, so for John to get a notice from him in the mail it meant it was serious.

_Meet soon._

_T._

He hated that his letters were always so short and gave no detail on the severity of the situation, but it was understandable. It must have been dangerous for Trelawny to reach out to _him_ after all.

John kept his mask up and his eyes keen, if Trelawny was in the area as well as the gang, that meant double the risk in going to see him. He assured John often that he hadn't made contact with the gang yet, and that he was waiting for him to make the first move but that didn't mean John necessarily trusted him. He knew that if Dutch or Arthur got wind of his whereabouts and told Trelawny that he would squeal to save his own good graces with them... But John knew couldn't blame Trelawny for that, he stuck his neck out for John when he really didn't have to... Which ultimately kept John from strangling him on some occasions.

In the end... He was the one who ran and deserted them, _he_ had to be the one to grovel.

Just the thought made the hair on the back of John's neck bristle with distaste but... He _had_ grown, after all, it was _his_ decision to leave, no one else's.

Glancing to his right, John noted the sign as he rolled into the settlement: _Copper Lake._ He had been here a few times and made sure to take back roads and alleyways since he had observed both Dutch and Hosea here on numerous occasions, in fact, he almost ran into Dutch once, thankfully he had his mask on. He took his hood off to appear a bit less suspicious but he never took his mask off unless he knew he was safe. He tried to get Trelawny to move to somewhere a little less dangerous but of course, the shit head needed the best amenities available and made sure to remind John that this was on _his_ terms... To which he wasn't wrong but despite his insufferable attitude he was useful and he did help John after everything that had gone on.

John dismounted Gypsy and tied her behind the establishment where Trelawny had been staying and carefully slinked along the side of the building, his eyes scanning carefully for any of his estranged family. Arthur and Abigail were the only people to get a look at his mask but he didn't want to risk anything coming to fruition before he was ready. Carefully, John slipped into the side door into the hotel, peeking around to make sure no staff were around that would view him as suspicious.

Only when he was inside did he reach up and uncover his face with a small huff of breath, it never got any less nerve-wracking avoiding gang in highly condensed areas, but it just kept John from lingering.

"Room 204." He muttered softly to himself, he had navigated this building a handful of times since arriving in the area and knew there was a back staircase that avoided more foot traffic.

When he was finally on the second floor, John traversed down the hall as quietly as he could and once he stopped at the assigned number on Trelawny's room he reached up.

_Knock. Knock. Knock-Knock. Knock-Knock. Knock._

It was simple, but it was a small pattern that he used to tell Josiah that it was him and not someone he wasn't suspecting. He heard footsteps and on instinct, John rested his hand on his sidearm just in case but when the familiar mustached man opened the door he breathed out a small sigh of relief. Nothing was said but Trelawny stepped aside and allowed John entry before poking his head out and making sure no one followed before shutting and locking the door behind him.

"I trust that you were smart." He mused

"Course." John replied softly.

"Want some tea, dear boy?" Josiah offered.

"I want you to tell me what you want so I can get outta here." John grumbled in reply.

"Of course, I forgot you're always straight to business." Josiah mused with slight amusement but a serious look overtook his expression worrying John. "I'm afraid it's not good news... They're heading this way." he sighed.

"What!?" John gasped. "When? How many?"

"Slow down and be a quiet dear boy... These are government agents after all." Josiah hushed and John sighed before reaching up and rubbing his eyes. "I'm sure you remember my dear friend Miss Ivy Winters right?" Josiah asked, watching John hesitate for a moment but nodding.

"Yes, she helped us with the Chief of Police in Virginia City right?"

"That's the one... She kept them stalled as long as she could but she only has so much time to waste for them. She wrote to me just last week and told me they were getting restless and then just three days ago, she told me they were gone... Just up and left."

"... How much time do you think we have?" John muttered as a pit began forming in his stomach.

"I don't know... She said they basically vanished without a trace, I think they figured out she was covering for Dutch or got suspicious but because they couldn't bring her up on charges they decided to drop their losses." Trelawny explained.

"But why just leave it doesn't make sense..."

"... It does if they figured out where Dutch is holding up somewhere."

**_BA-BUMP._ **

Of course... It made sense, they didn't just leave out of the blue and they sure as hell wouldn't just quit, they somehow managed to figure out where Dutch and the gang were lying low and didn't need to stick around in the area anymore. They were coming...

"Shit." John cursed.

"Don't panic... It has to be impossible for them to completely know where they're camped, not even I do... Speaking of which, did you find them?" Josiah asked.

"Yes... It's in a central location between here, Airdale and Wolf's Trail... You're _sure_ they're commin'?" John asked back, narrowing his eyes only somewhat.

"Of course, in fact, I actually have a little bit of information regarding the ringleader of this hunt."

"Well spit it out."

"Patience dear boy, patience." Josiah chided slightly as he reached into the inner pocket of his jacket and pulled out a piece of paper before handing it over to John.

Arching a brow, he reached forward and took the parchment before opening it up and was pleased to see a detailed description of the agent responsible for this mission.

"Lee Osborn..." John murmured softly.

"Apparently he wants to clean up the west and settle it for good... And considering his track record this may just be a reality." Josiah mentioned.

"What do you mean?"

"He's been wiping out every band of degenerates from Nebraska all the way to California... And the Chief of Police's murder caught his attention." He replied.

"B-But how? I don't understand... No one knew we did that." John said.

"Word gets around and when federal agents start questioning you for names, descriptions, _anything_ that can lead you to the target, you'd be surprised what people remember and Dutch has a rather specific description. Arthur and Hosea are forgettable in that sense, but Dutch? You have to remembered he stayed with Ivy for quite a while when he was injured... Any of her neighbors could have recognized him comin' out of there but that's just a guess... It could have been anywhere and the prices on your heads? Unrivaled except for Colm O'Driscoll himself and he's all but disappeared as well." Josiah explained seriously.

Of course... John sighed and nodded, he couldn't keep stalling anymore, now with a detailed description of the man in charge for this bounty, at least now he had Josiah's word and this to _hopefully_ save his skin.

"... Are you ready for this?" Josiah then asked with a small level of concern.

"I think so... I'll go scout around, make sure they haven't moved, say a couple days?"

"That sounds sufficient..."

John nodded and stood so he could escape the confinement of the hotel room but he paused in his stride.

"Trelawny..?" He murmured, not daring to turn around.

"Hm..?"

"... Thank you for... All of this. You took a big risk for me, I won't forget that." He stated, there was a pause.

"... Well, I think we can both agree that without me at your side your chances drop dramatically, and despite what you did... They're my home too, losing them would be like losing a part of myself, so we're even." He replied.

John blinked and turned despite his instincts telling him not to, but all he could see was a friendly smile on Josiah's face... The first friendly expression he had seen in... He couldn't even remember. Gulping, John nodded, feeling a huge weight lift from his shoulders. Trelawny wasn't unnecessarily cold to him, but he sure wasn't afraid to give his opinion and he was often condescending, not that John didn't deserve it but now... For once, it felt like maybe he really could make up for all of this, just maybe.

Without another word shared, John quickly dipped out of the room, his mask back intact and his hood ready for when he got back outside. The fact that Josiah was willing to come with him to reintroduce himself back into the gang meant a lot to him, and John had to admit that Trelawny was probably right when he said that without his help to keep the gang from tearing him apart, he probably wouldn't live to warn them of their impending doom.

When John was finally back on Gypsy, he finally felt safe, or at least he could outrun whatever came his way but only when he was in the unending silence of the forest again that he felt truly relaxed. After almost a year on his own, John found that he no longer liked settlements or big cities. It was just so much easier to make it out in the wilderness surprisingly without the bullshit of human contact.

Hell, John probably would have gone back to that if he hadn't found out what he did while he was on his travels.

* * *

It was late... The night was quiet and yet... He couldn't sleep.

John blinked as he laid in his tent, he had surveyed his surroundings more times than he could count, he marked areas around his tent with things that proved to keep at least some of the aggressive fauna away and he hadn't heard any calls in hours... So why couldn't he sleep?

_ARTHUR!_

Hearing Abigail scream _his_ name was like rubbing salt in John's wounds that had reopened the moment he laid eyes on her... And her first instinct was to protect the baby. He knew she would take to mothering like a cow to the pasture, he wished he could have seen the child's face... And yet with that realization, the gut-wrenching regret came with it.

John sat up and sighed as he ran a hand up through the dark locks that cascaded down his shoulders. He really needed to cut it... And just like that he was reminded about how when he was a boy, Annabelle used to trim his hair for him. He hadn't thought about her in...

Taking a breath, John stowed the feeling of loss that he hadn't felt in years. All at once, he felt guilty about forgetting about Annabelle as well. He had a lot of things to feel guilty for, most of which was not being there to witness the birth of his child. Out of everything that stood out most in his mind despite never wanting one to begin with. In all truths, he still wasn't sure where he stood there, but he should have been there no matter what.

He wondered if they were still awake... Probably not the baby but, maybe Abigail was up? He'd give almost anything to see her face once again. Reaching over to his watch, John took it and looked at the face, if he hurried maybe he'd catch a glimpse of her. He got up quickly and saddled Gypsy without a smidge of hesitation before taking out his lantern and beginning in the direction of the Van Der Linde camp, he had to make sure they were still there after all.

After about fifteen or twenty minutes, John carefully stowed his light, knowing that he was close and almost as if they were on cue, John could hear laughing in the distance through the trees. They were definitely still here.

"Hold on, girl." John whispered softly before he pulled back and dismounted his loyal horse.

Walking around to her front, John reached into his satchel before pulling out a sugar cube and delighting her with a treat for her dedication to him. However he had to continue his journey on foot, he didn't want to risk them seeing her after all, Gypsy was a pretty recognizable horse much like The Count or The Admiral.

On his approach, John could eventually make out a fire pit but he was still a way off. Humming, he reached into his bag once again but pulling his binoculars out this time. It was possible that it was too dark but John wanted to get an idea of who was around before stumbling into someone like Arthur or Bill who would probably have his head on a pike if they caught him.

Searching out and seeing nothing but darkness, John cursed softly and carefully focused on the fire until moving around slowly, the swishing of a horsetail catching his eye and relieving John when he could make out at least a couple of horses. It seemed Dutch, Bill, Hosea, and Javier were here, but there was no sign of The Admiral which was for the best. Blinking and taking his eyes away, John took a breath, this was a big risk... But before he could even talk himself out of it, his feet began to move.

He crept forward as the glow from the fire got closer and closer, he could hear Bill's ruckus laughter and Javier's guitar as he got closer, but he didn't dare get too cocky. Though from his new position he could definitely see who was still awake.

"Will you shut your trap up! You're gonna wake the baby!" He heard Susan sneer.

"For Christ's sake, it's always about the baby, well I'm sorry but the baby ain't bringing in anything for us to eat so can I have my drink in peace?" Bill challenged.

"Excuse me!?" Susan snarled.

"Will the both of you please!" Abigail growled from her tent.

John gasped softly as he heard her voice and quickly looked to his left to see her head poke out to glare at the offending party members before receding back into it. It was short-lived and John deflated slightly when he saw her disappear but... Perhaps she'd come back out anyway. However, his focus soon went back to those he could see, and he was surprised to feel the warmth blossom in his heart as he saw Susan send a scathing glare at Bill who waved her off unapologetically.

For some reason... Seeing Susan being the camp dragon, Bill the camp drunk, and in the corner of his eye he could see Uncle being the camp freeloader, it made him realize everything he had been missing as if he needed another reason to feel like a fool.

John sighed, however... Before he could even react, he felt the nothing other than the cold chamber of a gun pressing against the back of his head.

"... Game over."

John's eyes widened... That voice... It was Arthur.

He was standing there... With a gun to the back of his head. How the fuck had he not heard Arthur coming!? How could he have let this whole thing go to shit? Slowly turning, his hands coming up so the other wouldn't shoot as he still knelt, looking up to see the man he had been dreading to see more than anyone else looking at him with nothing but contempt.

"... Who the hell are you?" He then asked, glaring at John's mask.

Swallowing harshly, John thought about his options, if he spoke it would be over but glancing over just briefly... It seemed that no one had noticed that he was caught other than Arthur... If he could somehow manage to get away...

Taking one last look up and for the first time... Getting a good look at the other's eyes, it seemed that Arthur actually faltered for a moment, a look of pure confusion coming over him as the familiar expression in the unknown assailant's eyes caught him off guard, John acted quickly. With lightning speed accuracy, John's hand swooped across and caught the barrel of Arthur's rifle, shoving it to the side before he stood and landed a swift kick into Arthur's stomach.

He gasped out loud and collapsed, watching the man he had been hunting for beginning to make his escape. That fucker... Arthur would make him suffer, hell the kick nearly made him puke with how hard it was, but there was no way he was running after him, so he did the next best thing...

Arthur narrowed his eyes as his arm clutched his stomach while he doubled over on the ground, but sucking up the pain just briefly, he managed to straighten himself up as he saw the masked man beginning to blend into trees. He was _not_ escaping a second time... Arthur aimed his rifle up and closed one of his eyes... Before exhaling and pulling the trigger.

**_BANG._ **

He could hear a few of the girls shriek from camp from the surprise of the unexpected gunfire, but Arthur saw the man fall... There was no doubt that Arthur got him. Huffing, Arthur used the butt of his gun to carefully push him up from the ground, still groaning and holding his gut.

"Goddammit." He growled as he began walking toward the downed man. "Fucking asshole." He added.

As he got closer, it seemed that the kick had saved the other man's life, because due to the pain, Arthur's bullet pierced the back of his thigh and missed his torso. He was still writhing and groaning as Arthur got close.

"Gonna kick me, huh?" Arthur growled before pulling his leg back and landing a kick into the other's stomach for good measure while he was down, hearing just the slightest _oof._

Arthur didn't waste time in quickly throwing the other onto his stomach and straddling his back so he could hogtie him properly. He proved he was willing to try to escape after all, but now Arthur was pissed, who the hell had the audacity to kick him like that?

Quickly flipping the man back over onto his back and looking down, the other was panting and looking up at Arthur with nothing but fear, to which he reveled in for a moment... But within an instant, Arthur's heart stopped.

That eyebrow scar the other man sported... Arthur recognized it... The way his eyes looked up at him too. All of a sudden, all the anger that Arthur had for this stranger for kicking him all but dissipated and he stared down at the other like he was a ghost.

"Arthur! That you?" he heard Dutch call, momentarily pulling Arthur out of his shock and causing him to glance back briefly but he didn't respond.

Instead... Arthur reached down and despite the other struggling to get away from him, when he pulled the mask down... Arthur thought he could have fainted.

"... You." He said, his voice taking a cold and dark turn.

"A-Arthur..." John barely squeaked above a whisper. "A-Arthur I-"

"You." Arthur repeated, his eyes beginning to widen as the full realization that this man had been John the whole time.

The look on Arthur's face was nothing short of terrifying... He looked like he could have killed John at that moment.

"P-Please Arthur I-... I-I-..." John stuttered, trying to get his bearings and say anything, but with the bullet in the back of his leg and the shock of being caught he was coming up short.

There was a moment of silence and for a moment... Arthur really considered killing John right there where he laid. His eyes were different, filled with something John had never seen, he looked like a completely different person as the feelings of shock, anger and betrayal hit Arthur all at once, resulting in nothing but a pure hatred fueled glare and slowly, Arthur's gun began to rise and stop as it leveled itself with John's head.

However, as if saved by the bell, Jack's wailing broke through the trees and echoed in Arthur's head... And it seemed that John would live to at least see another minute because his gun lowered quickly, but as soon as Arthur slung the rifle back over his shoulder he lunged forward, taking a fistful of John's hair before beginning to drag him toward camp.

"A-Ah! W-Wait! Arthur please!" He begged but it fell on deaf ears as he saw the glow of the fire getting closer and closer.

Dutch was at the fire pit with Hosea, glancing up as Arthur returned. He smiled openly and opened his mouth to speak but whatever he was about to say was lost as he realized Arthur was dragging something, or rather _someone_ back into camp.

"Arthur? What the hell is that?" he asked, but Arthur just slung John forward by his hair and threw him at Dutch's feet.

"... Look who I found." Arthur sneered as everyone in camp suddenly stopped what they were doing as the realized that John had suddenly reappeared.

"J-... John?" Dutch asked with confusion, noting the bullet in his thigh. "... So that's what you shot, hm?" He inquired rather stoically as well as he glared down at John. "... You got a lotta nerve, son."

"W-Wait! Please! I-I didn't come back for no reason please listen to me!" John quickly gasped out, panting and cringing due to the pain in his leg.

Arthur scoffed as Hosea came to his side and looked down at the rather pathetic position John was in. One of his boots lightly landing near the bullet hole in his leg and resting upon it, making John cry out loudly.

"... Lousy shot, if you ask me." Hosea muttered.

"Yeah well if he hadn't kicked me in the stomach I mighta been able to spare us all this garbage." Arthur scoffed in reply.

"That's enough," Dutch ordered seriously before kneeling down, a cigar in his mouth as he looked down at John. "... Did you come back, or were you caught, John?" He asked with a small smirk as he flicked his ashes in the other's face.

"P-Please... I-I know I shouldn't've-"

Without another word, Arthur landed another kick into John's gut, not wanting to hear the whole sob story. John _abandoned_ them... Abandoned Arthur... And now he wants to come back and act like he hadn't gotten sloppy, that he always had a reason to return. Why? Why now..?

Why now when Arthur was finally getting over him..?

"Arthur." Dutch snorted, sending a slightly scolding glare up at him.

"Why are you actin' like this is funny?" Arthur snarled slightly, making Dutch frown as he recalled how broken Arthur was when they remembered John had left.

"You're right... It ain't funny, but let's be honest, it's a little amusin'." He replied.

"I say we string him up for the bears." Bill growled.

"Or the buzzards." Javier mentioned.

"What? Come on leave some fun for us." Mac chortled as the men began to gather.

"P-Pinkertons!" John suddenly shouted, pausing the conversation of what was to be done with him. "P-Please listen... E-Even if you kill me... Th-There are Pinkerton Agents heading this way right now! Th-They know what we did to Chief Beckett..." He sputtered, causing a slightly concerned look to wash over Dutch's face.

"Pinkertons..? The hell are those?"

"P-Pinkerton Detective Agents... Th-They're like the governments personal mercenaries, under the radar and easy to keep you from catchin' onto them! I-I couldn't let you walk into a trap o-or worse please believe me..." John begged.

"Oh please, Dutch don't tell me you're buyin' this..." Arthur scoffed, but seeing the thoughtful look on Dutch's face Arthur almost blew his stack.

"I dunno... Why would he lie?" Dutch asked simply.

"Why would he lie? Why would he lie!?" Arthur screamed.

"Calm down son..." Hosea muttered.

"Don't tell me to calm down goddammit! We should kill him... Right here, right now." Arthur snarled, earning a terrified look from John.

"Come on Arthur, you know we can't do that." Dutch sighed, but he looked up incredulously as Arthur suddenly started to laugh.

"We can't huh... You might not be able to... But I sure as shit can." Arthur mused before pulling out his revolver and pointing it down at John once again.

"Arthur no!" Susan gasped out as the tension suddenly skyrocketed.

"Arthur, put the gun down." Dutch tried to calm.

Arthur _almost_ pulled the trigger... But he glanced up for a moment just in time to see Abigail walk out of her tent with Jack in her arms... And watching one of her hands come up to cover her mouth in shock as she saw Arthur standing over John with a gun in his hand. Arthur blinked as he stared at her for a moment, but it wasn't until Jack's head turned around and looked at him that he dropped his gun, but Abigail was quick to cover Jack's eyes and look away when John turned his head toward her.

"Abigail..." He whispered, but she refused to look at him.

Arthur glared down at John, even though he re-holstered his gun, John was _far_ from safe but he shook his head before his intense eyes landed on Dutch.

"... I hope you know what you're doin'." he growled before beginning to walk toward Abigail but he stopped mid-stride, causing John to refocus his slightly blurry gaze onto him, and with one last icy stare, Arthur spoke. "... It woulda been easier if you died."

John was shocked to feel how _shattered_ he felt hearing those words... But what was worse was that the truth held strong in Arthur's eyes, he wasn't lying... And with that, he watched as Arthur approached Abigail, wrapped an arm around her shoulders and guided her back into her tent away from his eyesight.

Damn him... Damn him for knowing just what to say to destroy John.

> I wanna live in a land of lakes  
> Where the great waves break  
> And the night runs right into the day  
> I wanna be with the ones I left  
> But I'm way out west  
> And the years keep on slipping away  
> I wanna run on the sacred dunes  
> Through the ancient ruins  
> Where the fires of my ancestors burned  
> I remember that fateful day  
> When I ran away  
> And you told me I couldn't return
> 
> You made me swear I'd never forget  
> I made a vow I'd see you again  
> I will be back one day, and I'll find you  
> There by the great big lake
> 
> I been running a long, long time  
> Trying to flee that life  
> But I can't seem to leave it behind  
> Wanna visit the windswept shores  
> Of a time before  
> When the moon and the stars were aligned  
> I remember the bright spring day  
> When you sparked that flame  
> And a fire that continues to burn  
> I remember the day I left  
> Headin' way out west  
> When you told me to never return
> 
> You made me swear I'd never forget  
> I made a vow I'd see you again  
> I will be back one day, and I'll find you  
> There by the great big lake  
> I will be back one day, and I'll find you  
> There by the great big lake
> 
> source: [I Will Be Back One Day by Lord Huron](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNhj_0cK_Nw)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaah! I know I couldn't keep you guys waiting for that long I hope the lead up to this has been worth it!  
> -Eros


	17. Johnny Boy

So much for coming back _the right way_... Currently, John was tied up against the trunk of a tree, and while Bill and Mac had taken a few cheap shots at him as he was being hauled away, when he looked up again he was somewhat surprised to see Susan standing there with a small basket in her hands. She seemed hesitant but she walked forward without a word before kneeling beside John and beginning to work at the bullet wound in his leg.

"... Susan?" He asked softly, watching her flinch somewhat but continue working without reply. "Miss Grimshaw please..." He sighed, watching her wrap his leg up, but what he wasn't prepared for was to see her look at him, her lip quivering and her eyes strikingly painful to look at.

However, with a quick inhale, her lips formed back into a tight line as she checked to make sure John wasn't actually bleeding out. In all his years, John had _never_ seen Susan cry, he assumed that she often mourned alone when she could be free with her feelings... So to see her so openly hurt by his actions, John quickly averted his gaze. The shame was too much to bear... However, when Susan stood up when her work was done she turned around, but paused.

"... You'll live, for now." She stated coldly before beginning taking her leave.

John knew not to expect a warm welcome, but he wasn't sure he'd be able to handle this. The entire family scorning him, but what was he to expect? He broke the code... However, remembering the crucial piece of evidence in his jacket he gasped.

"S-Susan please! Wait!" He begged, watching her pause momentarily but not look at him. "... I-In my jacket, there's a paper... Please, take it to Dutch... That's all I ask, I swear."

For a moment, he thought Susan was going to walk away but she turned, her hard stare on him, reading him for bullshit most likely. However, to her apparent surprise, John seemed genuine, and besides it wasn't like they had cause to believe he'd come back to hurt them. What would he gain from that? She finally took a breath before walking forward, setting her dwindling medical supplies aside before kneeling one last time and slowly reaching into the inner pocket of John's jacket.

Feeling the folded piece of paper she carefully pulled it out before slightly narrowing her eyes at John and opening it up in front of him, looking down at it, her look of shock gave John at least a little relief as she peered over at him with some indignation. Perhaps John wasn't lying after all... But she was quick to clear her throat and stand once again.

The gang probably had a strict gag order against John, it wouldn't surprise him if they were told not to interact with him at all under threat of punishment. It still surprised John to a degree how much it hurt, he had been alone for so long he had almost forgotten what it was like to be apart of a family, and now... He just wished he hadn't been so rash.

The next day Abigail was _still_ pacing back in forth in the tent, Arthur had taken Jack from her so she could have the moment that she wasn't even prepared for. Jack could feel the tension, especially on Arthur which caused him to be fussy, but Arthur was so far beyond emotional stress that it didn't even phase him.

"W-Why would he do this?" She asked. "H-How could he think he could just _show up_ back in here!?" She hissed, reaching up and running a hand through her hair in exhaustion, but her frustrated tears couldn't be helped and despite how enraged Arthur was, to see Abigail cry broke his heart.

When she finally stopped pacing, the situation finally seemed to settle within her. John had taught her how to read... And if she was being honest, despite feeling that Arthur was truly Jack's father, she was excited to go on this journey with John even if he was nervous about it. She wasn't sure how she would have made it without Arthur at least stepping up where he had. Despite his behavior being erratic and abnormal lately, at least he didn't ditch them.

Arthur sighed quietly before he carefully laid Jack in his bassinet despite his protest before he approached Abigail and gently began ushering her into his arms and regardless of the fact that Arthur wasn't exactly her favorite person right now, she couldn't help leaning into him as she sniffed. He wrapped his arms around her fully and leaned his head into hers as he tried to shove down all the grief and anguish he felt seeing John again.

Why..?

Why did he have to come back..?

At first, Arthur went into the hug hoping to support Abigail but now... He just held onto her in fear of losing it should he let go before he was ready.

"Why did he have to do this..?" She whimpered.

"... I don't know." He replied softly, not knowing what else to say.

Arthur remembered that night so vividly... Hell, he used to have nightmares about it, John's disappearance. There were so many thoughts that went through his head, was he warm..? Was he safe?

Was he even alive?

He used to dream about John coming back, telling him how sorry he was and how it was all just a misunderstanding, but those were just dreams... The reality of the situation was so much fucking worse than Arthur could have imagined, that he left willingly, knowing how much he would destroy not only the people who raised him but the people who loved him... And the one person who would have gone with him.

Arthur used to think about how it would have been like if he had run away with John years ago, but seeing the consequences of John's selfishness, he realized that he had made the right choice staying behind, but it didn't make it any less painful.

"I'm sorry..." Arthur eventually sighed as he pulled away from her, reaching up and wiping some of her tears away. "I-I wish I could... I wish there was some way..." He rambled for a moment but eventually just shook his head and looked away. "... This is so fucked up." He eventually admitted.

"Hey." She chided softly. "Little ears." She reminded despite her tears before leaning down to pick up the baby, and even though Arthur meant what he said, he couldn't help but smile weakly at her instinct to mother above all else.

"Sorry..." He mentioned before looking to Jack who pouted a bit. "... God, I'm sorry." He breathed before leaning in and pressing his forehead against Jack's, watching the baby smile once again and babble happily at having Arthur so close to him.

Reaching out, Jack ran his palms over the scruffle on Arthur's cheeks and squawked out happily, he always loved playing with Arthur's beard no matter the length. He especially loved when Arthur had grown it out while they were traveling but Arthur couldn't keep it long forever, it was too much to manage even though his hair was probably the longest it had been in years. Hearing Jack's genuine glee in the simplest of things, it managed to erode Arthur's bitter anger for a moment and remind him there were more important things in life than allowing John's reappearance to hurt him... But there was still the problem of what to do with him.

"I should go see Dutch and Hosea..." he muttered regretfully before he pulled away from Jack and looked to Abigail before he reached out and gently caressed her cheek.

Arthur felt defeated, he had come back with a mission to free Abigail from this affair but now... He didn't even know what to do with himself let alone what to say to Abigail. How in the hell was he supposed to break things off with her and hurt her even farther? Arthur wasn't sure what was crueler, hurting her now or later...

"I know." She replied understandingly as always as she leaned into his touch, making Arthur's heart clench, but he allowed his hand to slip away from her before he nodded and began to walk toward the doorway, but he paused.

"Abigail." He stated seriously, but he didn't look back. "... Until we decide what to do with John, don't talk to him, don't feed him, don't engage with him at all... That's an order."

"... Okay." He heard from behind him, and with the relief that Abigail understood his command, Arthur slipped out.

Arthur didn't dare to look in John's direction as he trudged toward Dutch's tent where he was certain that he and Hosea were discussing John's fate and it seemed he was correct as he walked in on the two of them sitting with hard expressions. Dutch glanced over and seemed relieved.

"Arthur... We were just talkin' about you." He mentioned.

"Only good things I assume." Arthur replied dryly as he walked over to Dutch's cot casually and sat down upon it.

"Well, we were just discussin' on what to do with John... We wanted your opinion." Hosea explained.

"You already know where I stand." Arthur scoffed.

"You can't really be sayin' we should kill him..." Dutch muttered with some discontent.

"Why not? Why should he be different, Dutch?" Arthur scoffed.

"Arthur." Hosea quipped sternly, earning a pointed look from Arthur as his heart began to race.

"... You can't seriously be sayin' that we should give him another chance, are you?" He asked, his temper beginning to rise again.

"No, that's not what I said." Hosea reminded seriously. "There's no way that we could possibly trust him again or his motives but to kill him seems... Too far." He mentioned.

"I think you're both being unreasonable, _we_ out of everyone have known John the longest and I think he deserves the benefit of the doubt at least once."

"The benefit of the doubt... The benefit of the doubt? Are you shittin' me?" Arthur snarled. "I shouldn't have to remind you but I will, he _abandoned_ us Dutch, _abandoned_ you and your goddamn philosophy." Arthur spat as he got up almost as soon as he sat.

"I'm warnin' you, Arthur." Dutch stated, narrowing his eyes up at Arthur a bit.

"How are you gonna say I'm being unreasonable!?" Arthur barked, but before any more words could be yelled, Susan peeked in.

"Um, I know you gentlemen are busy but-"

"Please Susan, not now." Dutch sighed in exasperation.

"But I got this from John... It looks important." Susan replied, holding out the folded paper out to Dutch. "He told me to give it to you."

Arthur and Dutch paused their back and forth for a moment as Hosea reached out and took the paper before nodding to her and watching Miss Grimshaw take her leave before opening it up and beginning to read it's contents. It seemed that whatever opinion Hosea had about John seemed to shift, albeit just a bit.

"Well, shit..." He mused.

"What?" Arthur asked, watching Hosea hand over the paper to Dutch to which he peered eagerly over his shoulder.

_Log 45,_

_Traces of The Van Der Linde Gang still hold up in Virginia City but their whereabouts still remained unknown. We believe that they have had contact or have worked with the likes of a Miss Ivy Winters, and with her status in the city, the likelihood of gathering information seems unlikely, but we've had numerous reported sightings ever since we put out a notice in the local paper. I have to admit, they are the smartest of the bandits we've tracked and have nearly erased themselves from the local memory, the only tips we've gotten are from people only cooperating with the condition of remaining anonymous. Whatever they did, they scared people into keeping quiet about it._

Underneath there was a different style of handwriting, and all three men recognized it as the slippery conman who they hadn't been in contact with since arriving at this campsite.

_Lee Orsborn._

_Looks to be 55? Unsure, but the greying of his hair has given me reason to suspect his age._

_Scar on the left side of his cheek, large, unable to miss it._

_Still gathering the information of his rank and influence, leads a squad of Pinkerton Detective Agents._

_Has a wife and two daughters, but their location is unknown._

_Uses intimidation and force when necessary, AVOID AT ALL COSTS._

"Is that... Is that Trelawny?" Arthur asked, furrowing his brows. "Did we even know he was around here?"

"Not a clue... But he may have vital information on both this Lee Orsborn fella _and_ John... I wonder how long they've been conspiring." Dutch mentioned thoughtfully as Arthur simply rolled his eyes.

"Neither of you think this is incredibly convenient? We've laid low for _months,_ not done a single job and we've been here in the same place for god knows how long already and we've not seen a _single_ suspicious character sniffin' around except for John. I'm not buying it." He explained.

"Arthur's right there, but we can't dismiss it no matter how angry we are at John..." Hosea replied begrudgingly.

"Jesus fuckin' Christ." Arthur scoffed. "Have the both of you suddenly forgot the code? How are _you_ of all people," Arthur snapped, turning to Dutch. "About to question _my_ loyalty when John has been gone a goddamn year! This is bullshit and the both of you know it." He scoffed.

"But we don't!" Dutch growled. "Weren't you the one always tellin' me to be more cautious!? You can't let your feelings cloud your judgment over our safety Arthur." Dutch tried to explain but Arthur was too far gone.

"Oh? I'm the one letting my emotions cloud my judgment?" Arthur inquired before stepping up to Dutch. "What if I took off?" He then asked seriously.

"... Is that a threat, Arthur?" Dutch inquired standing up and narrowing his eyes dangerously at Arthur.

"Maybe..." Arthur sneered back.

"Alright, that's enough!" Hosea barked at the both of them.

"How is it, that whenever I screw up, I'm the one who has loyalty issues, but when _John_ has been gone a whole goddamn year, didn't give a _shit_ about us, you want to give him a free pass? I can tell you one thing partner, I'm not the one gettin' soft... And you better remember where _your_ loyalty lies Dutch." Arthur snarled before shoving passed both him and Hosea.

"Arthur wait! Don't leave like this." Hosea tried to convince as he followed Arthur out of the tent, everyone made sure to stay out of his way, but Arthur suddenly spun around toward Hosea and it became apparent he wasn't thinking rationally.

" _You_ of all people should understand where I'm coming from." He sneered, stopping Hosea in his tracks with the hurt so transparent in his eyes before walking away again back toward The Admiral.

John could hear the conversation in the tent since Arthur wasn't the most subtle person, but hearing the words shared, he wasn't sure whether to be scared or relieved. He did bring valuable information after all but hearing Arthur vehemently rejecting his return he wasn't sure how this would go.

"Let him go, Hosea." Dutch sighed as he followed out of the tent soon after, but his eyes soon turned to John. "... We have others to deal with anyway." He mentioned, making the younger man gulp.

* * *

Arthur wasn't even sure where he was going... He was just getting the _fuck_ out of here. He knew it was only right to stay with Abigail, but right now he was worried he'd do or say something to hurt her just out of the hurt he was feeling and that certainly wouldn't be fair to her or Jack... And he wasn't really interested in seeing Vincent with how fucking angry he was, he didn't want to infect the others cheery attitude especially with how little Arthur slept the night before knowing John was in their camp.

He wanted to drink... And he wanted to drink _a lot_.

Even though Arthur wanted to just go to the closest establishment, he headed towards Jackson's bar since the other knew him a little more personally, hopefully he could score a free whiskey while he was there. So many things were running through Arthur's mind, most of which were way's he could make John suffer... But he knew deep down he didn't really want that, but what did he want? He sure as shit didn't want John to get off, if he were honest he would have preferred John _stay_ gone.

"Arthur right?" He heard the familiar voice as soon as he walked in and glanced up to see Jackson wiping down the bar, it was still pretty empty in the early evening, but Arthur knew it wouldn't be long before people started filtering in.

"Yeah..." He muttered as he approached the bar and sat upon on of the stools. "Can I get a whiskey?" He asked somewhat despondent.

"You alright?" The other inquired casually as he arched a brow over at Arthur.

"Just keep 'em comin' please." Arthur sighed, ignoring the question, however remembering that the other man had just lost his brother he frowned. "I-I'm sorry." He muttered. "I should be askin' you that... You seen Vincent since..?" He questioned as the other got his glass, and even though he paused for a moment he nodded.

"Yeah... Came and saw me after the dust settled a little, Sheriff told me what happened so I knew but I can't imagine what that poor boy is goin' through." Jackson mentioned somberly as he gave Arthur his drink.

"Bad business... My condolences for your loss." Arthur said before quickly throwing the whiskey back and gulping it down without hesitation. "Another."

"Ah, it's alright... It wasn't your fault after all." The other mentioned as he did as Arthur asked.

The conversation died not long after all, with Arthur doing whatever he could to drink the pain away and make himself forget the shit storm he'd be returning to in camp. He knew he had gone too far threatening to leave, but how else was he supposed to make Dutch see his point? Despite not wanting to admit it, Arthur knew John's case was different, Hosea and Dutch had raised him, he wasn't just some hood who got tired of the rules and split...

Which only made it all the more painful... How could he have just... Left?

It had been so long since Arthur had dwelled on John's reason for leaving, he supposed now he could actually ask but... Did he want to? Would _any_ reason be sufficient for ditching them..? For leaving Arthur behind to wonder what he had done wrong? It wasn't a secret that Arthur was no angel, but if John had just... Told him, or talked to him, or anything maybe he could have fixed it, but no... He just left.

With the realization that John didn't want to tell Arthur why, that he left because he wanted to go _without_ him, despite all they had been through together and regardless of the secrets they shared... Arthur would have done anything to keep John, but John didn't think he was enough to stay.

Arthur's jaw clenched after about the sixth shot, he was hoping the alcohol would make him forget, but instead, it just made him think about it more and more... And how fucking in love with John he was. For god sake, Arthur would have taken a bullet for him... Maybe even died for him.

"Another."

"Another."

"Another."

Just one after another, even after Arthur felt like his head was swimming and his heart felt heavy, he kept drinking. Part of him wanted to get away from the crowd that had slowly piled into the bar over the time that he had been there, after just a couple of hours he had already drunk enough for multiple people, and he noted a few stares he got but he simply didn't care enough to do anything about it... Until a familiar face walked in, making Arthur scoff and roll his eyes.

He had seen them in the corner of his eye, strutting in like they owned the place even though they lacked their ring leader who was currently in jail.

"Hey, is that who I think it is over there?"

"Yeah, it sure is..."

The one thing about lackeys that never failed to amuse Arthur was without their master to control them, they lacked all threat, and Arthur didn't even flinch as they began sauntering toward him. One man sat to the stool directly next to him to his left, another to his right, and one stood behind him. Arthur saw the small flash of warning in Jackson's eyes as he glared at the three instigators but had other customers to tend to.

"Where's your little mouse that you were protecting?" One taunted.

"I could ask you the same thing." Arthur scoffed as he brought the bottle he had been given and throwing it back once again, the empty glass making a distinct _clack_ on the wooden bar. "Oh wait... That's right, he's in jail." He snorted.

"You think you're real funny don't you..."

"Oh, I know I'm funny, partner... You should take some notes considerin' they'll last longer than Myles on the gallows." He antagonized. "Now please, allow me to enjoy my wallowing in peace."

"Why would we do that? Sure seems like you've already laid yourself out, it wouldn't take much to teach you a lesson after all." Another one of the men threatened, looking rather smug until Arthur's head slowly began to crane in his direction and despite the hue of intoxication, Arthur's words were surprisingly crisp and clear.

"... You'd be surprised what I can do to people who piss me off."

It seemed whatever confidence the man attained had all but drained from him at that moment, but Arthur just quickly went back to nursing the next bottle that was brought his way. However, Arthur's casual nature only seemed to piss off his foes, since the next thing he knew, Arthur was thrown onto his back on the ground with a slight _oof_.

"Alright, that's enough! The lot of you get outta here!" Jackson ordered, not wanting another fight drawing attention to his bar.

Arthur wanted to get up and get a swing on the man who threw him off his chair, but it seemed that Jackson came to his rescue thankfully since he wasn't sure if he was going to be able to get up... So he laid there for a little while with a groan, however, he didn't notice the _other_ familiar face walk into the bar until he was suddenly standing over Arthur, sufficiently surprising him.

"... Taunting those less fortunate Arthur?" He mused with a level of amusement, Arthur's eyes fluttered momentarily until they opened, squinting a bit at first before his look of contempt softened.

"Vincent..." He muttered.

"Afraid so... The hell are you doin' on the floor? I just saw a couple of those thugs from before walk out... They didn't seem too roughed up, you on the other hand..." He mentioned, arching a brow.

"He only pushed me..." Arthur slurred.

"And that laid you out?" Vincent asked.

"He pulled my chair back... Wasn't expecting it..." He defended, watching Vincent smile a bit sweetly down at him.

"... Why don't we get you back to the ranch, I think you're done for the night." He offered.

"Who says..? I'm completely fine." He scoffed, waving Vincent off obnoxiously, yet he continued to lay on the floor.

"Uh-huh... I advise you to look at your current situation, Arthur." Vincent mentioned.

Despite arguing with him, Vincent never seemed angry or annoyed, he seemed to enjoy it more than anything, and perhaps it bled over to Arthur, because he eventually groaned once again, never able to say no to him.

"Fine... But you owe me..." He grumbled as Vincent offered a hand, to which he took and nearly stumbled into him when he was finally back up on his feet.

"Alright, we'll see if you remember that." He chuckled before glancing at his uncle. "Thanks for the tip..."

"Anytime, my boy... I'll be sure to stop by the ranch soon, we need to talk after all." The other replied, to which Vincent nodded without hesitation.

Arthur was a mess, he shuffled out the door with one of his shoulders draped around Vincent's shoulder while his feet feeling like they were defying him.

"Can you even ride..?" Vincent asked once they were outside.

"Who cares..?" Arthur scoffed, still in a slightly sour mood from before.

"Arthur, this ain't like you... Drinkin' like this." Vincent mentioned with a level of concern.

"Well, then you don't know me as well as you think you did..." Arthur chortled drunkenly, watching Vincent roll his eyes briefly.

"C'mon... I'll help you up." He mentioned before climbing onto his horse.

Once he was situated, Vincent helped pull Arthur up as he fumbled around trying to get on the back of the horse for a moment. It was pretty pathetic, but Vincent never seemed to scold him and after successfully roping The Admiral, Vincent started a trot back toward the property to keep Arthur from falling off, who leaned most of his weight into Vincent from behind, his head resting tiredly against his shoulder as they rode.

"How'd you... Even know I was there?" Arthur hiccuped.

"My uncle sent someone to come get me... Said you were actin' funny and probably shouldn't be pounding down the booze but it seems I took a little too long before I could prevent that." Vincent replied evenly.

"What a rat..." Arthur scoffed.

"Arthur!" Vincent honked a laugh. "He was just thinkin' about your wellbein' ya know." He chuckled.

"Pft... Why? I sure as shit don't care... Toss me off a damn waterfall for all I care..." Arthur muttered, briefly alarming Vincent for a moment as the ranch appeared in the distance.

"... Speakin' of which... I'm the one supposed to the one actin' a fool... What were you doin' there?" He asked curiously, but Arthur was quick to quiet himself until they got back to the house, and Vincent was sure to note the silence in response.

However, he didn't seem to press Arthur, who was waiting for all the questions surrounding his reason for drinking himself into a stupor, but they never came. Vincent just carefully slipped off the saddle before nearly catching Arthur who fell off the saddle and into his arms.

"Jesus Arthur, help me a little." He scoffed.

"Sorry... You're better off without me..." Arthur sighed, going through various emotions as Vincent helped make sure his feet were under before walking him in the house.

"You know that ain't true." Vincent replied simply as he kicked the front door shut behind him. "Why don't we get you some water..?" He asked as he watched Arthur slinking toward the bedroom, waving Vincent off again.

"Nah..."

Arthur was surely acting... Strange, drunk or not, he wasn't being himself. It worried Vincent, he knew Arthur mentioned having to deal with some family drama, he wondered if it could have contributed to this rapid downfall.

"Vincent heeeeeeelp..." Arthur whined slightly from down the hall. "The door won't work..." He groaned.

Arching a brow, Vincent hurried only to see Arthur leaning against the shut door. He had to admit, it was kinda cute even if was acting like a child. Earning a small chuckle, Vincent walked down the hall and carefully moved Arthur so he was leaning against the wall before opening the door to his room.

"C'mon, lemme help you to the bed... Someone needs a nap." He mused.

"Someone? You mean me right?" Arthur asked.

"Yes, I mean you." Vincent snickered as he gently pulled Arthur's arm back over his shoulders and walked inside, however, Arthur stopped in his stride, confusing Vincent slightly until he looked over to see the rather disarming look on Arthur's face.

"... You're so fuckin' beautiful." He stated, his arm slowly slithering from around Vincent's shoulder while he turned toward him and his arms carefully wrapped around his waist.

"Oh please." Vincent snorted. "Come on, you really need to-"

Suddenly Arthur leaned in and crashed his lips against Vincent's, thoroughly surprising the smaller of the two as he pulled him close. Despite the taste of alcohol on his tongue, Vincent couldn't help leaning into the passionate gesture. However, Arthur's hands were quick to start inching up his shirt while he slowly began to walk them back toward the bed, and once Vincent felt the back of his knees hit the edge of the bed, he gasped when Arthur shoved him forward and quickly climbed on top of him once his back hit the comforter.

"A-Arthur what as gotten into you?" Vincent couldn't help but giggle as he felt Arthur's lips sloppily going after his neck and gently pushing him away.

Suddenly, the previous night's events and the talk with Dutch seemed to haunt Arthur again because he was quick to withdraw and huff softly as he looked down at Vincent, who could see all the sorrow suddenly beginning to make its way into Arthur's eyes. Though, before he could ask, Arthur sighed in exasperation and leaned in, pressing his forehead against Vincent's momentarily.

"Ugh... I'm sorry... I'm ruinin' this..." He snorted before rolling off of Vincent and flopped onto his back next to him, his eyes fluttering shut as Vincent sat back up and looking over at him with concern.

However, seeing that Arthur's eyes were closed, for a moment Vincent thought he had already passed out. Sighing quietly, he looked away and began to wonder what could have possibly set Arthur down such a catatonic and self-destructive journey.

"... He broke my heart, ya know." Arthur mumbled, piquing Vincent's interest as he looked back over with confusion.

"What? Who?" He inquired, watching Arthur's eyes lazily open as well as a drunken smile slithering over his features before he chortled.

"I forgot you ain't apart of that life..." He snorted. "If you was... You'd understand... Hell, he just shows up... Actin' like he ain't done nothin' wrong... I woulda done anythin' for him and he just... Left." He sighed, staring up at the ceiling, seeing Vincent tilt his head in the corner of his eye. "... I used to lay awake at night... Wonderin' where my Johnny boy was and he just... He wasn't there no more..."

Now it made sense... Arthur wasn't just self-destructing, he was heartbroken... And Vincent of all people knew what that was like, for a moment he thought about keeping his mouth shut, but he truly wasn't sure if Arthur would even remember this conversation in the morning.

"... When Myles and I were younger we used to be attached to the hip, did _everything_ together..." He muttered, looking away from Arthur as he spoke. "... I knew from a young age that I was... Different, I knew the way I felt wasn't normal, the way I looked at the other boys but Myles was just... Good for me, and as we grew up together I-... We-..." He stammered momentarily but quickly regained his voice. "... He was my first." He confessed.

Even though Arthur was drunk, he listened to what Vicnent had to say, and even though he was confused at first, he started putting it together in his mind.

_Myles Black..? That's a long and... Complicated story._

_I-I know he's an asshole but... I've known him a long time, I never thought he'd ever do something like this..._

_... Why did you have to do this to us? Wasn't ruining me once enough for you!?_

"After we... Well, he got scared and I can't blame him... But it broke me, I thought... I dunno I guess, I was young, we both were... I suppose part of me just hoped we could keep it a secret together and just... Make a life I guess, but I was naive, I know that now." He sighed before finally looking over to Arthur who seemed to calm a bit as he looked over at him.

"... Did you love him?" Arthur asked, watching Vicnent's expression falter for a moment as he looked away again.

"... I think I did once upon a time... But not anymore." He said, and despite the confidence in his words, Arthur could hear the pain in his voice, just because Vincent no longer held those feelings for Myles, it didn't mean the situation didn't hurt him.

"... He was dumb." Arthur snorted before shaking his head. "I can't believe how dumb he was... But I got lucky so I guess it's okay." He mused matter-of-factly, making Vincent chuckle a little and look back over at him again.

"How so?"

"... Cause you're all mine now, who would be dumb enough to give you up? You're smart, easy on the eyes... And you have a nice ass." Arthur mentioned with a nod, but he snapped his fingers. "Oh, one more thing..." He mentioned before he slowly pushed himself up so that he was sitting next to Vincent who stared at him like a deer in headlights from the callous yet sweet words.

"A-And what is that..?" He mumbled, however, Arthur's face scrunched up momentarily.

"... I forgot." He muttered, watching as Vincent couldn't help but laugh off his blush.

"Alright, it's bedtime."

Vincent managed to get Arthur to move so that he was laying on the pillows, and he was snoring softly before Vincent could even finish pulling his boots off. He looked down at Arthur with a small sigh, frowning briefly but he couldn't help the warmth he had in his heart for the man that slept in his bed. Walking over to Arthur's side, he reached over and gently ran his fingers through the mess of his brunette mop before he began to disrobe so he could get into bed as well, it was late after all, he wondered how long Arthur had been there... Obviously long enough to get plastered...

> This life is a paradox  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  This love is a paradox
> 
>   
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me
> 
> Just like a desert needs a flood  
>  I still need your love  
>  No matter what, I'll hold my ground  
>  Even if I'm drowning, yeah
> 
> It's just the nature of keeping you close  
>  It's the ones you care for  
>  That will hurt you the most  
>  Nothing drops me from so high  
>  You leave me fighting for my life
> 
> Out of all the times I've opened up  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  Out of all the stupid things I've done  
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me, yeah  
>  This life is a paradox  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  This love is a paradox  
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me
> 
> Yeah, you kiss me when I'm down  
>  And you suck the poison out  
>  Then you make me sick again  
>  'Cause you've got the medicine
> 
> It's just the nature of loving you, girls  
>  It's the ones you fight for  
>  That will conquer your world, ooh
> 
> Out of all the times I've opened up  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  Out of all the stupid things I've done  
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me  
>  This life is a paradox  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  This love is a paradox  
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me
> 
> This life is a paradox  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  This love is a paradox  
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me
> 
> I'm bracing for the worst  
>  And hoping for the best  
>  Trying to make sense of  
>  The madness in my head
> 
> It's the problem with keeping me close  
>  The people you hold on to  
>  Are the ones who let go
> 
> This life is a paradox  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  This love is a paradox  
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me  
>  You're the only one who saw the real me, yeah  
>  You're the only thing that almost killed me
> 
> source: [Paradox by Jaymes Young](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uF7RKGqQWAQ)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm like lightning rn I know lmao. Hope everyone is still enjoying it! Thank you for reading!  
> -Eros


	18. Hollow Ground

Despite not wanting to look at him, John watched Arthur saddle up on The Admiral and ride off without another word after his harshness towards Hosea. It only worried John about the consequences he was about to face, but he was ready. He had been preparing himself ever since he had originally decided to reintroduce himself into the gang, and while this was _not_ the way he wanted to do it, it was done.

"Let him go, Hosea... We have others to deal with anyway." Dutch's voice broke out through the tension in the air and John flinched as he swallowed harshly, his gaze quickly turning back to the floor like a submissive dog.

Hearing his boots approaching, John wasn't sure if it was even appropriate to look at Dutch, especially after all the heartache he caused. As the crunching of the floor beneath Dutch got closer, John bit his tongue in anxiety and when the other actually knelt in front of him, John's eyes darted up hesitantly but remained locked on the floor.

"... Look at me, son." Dutch ordered, only torturing John a little more by forcing him to do something that he felt he didn't deserve to, but slowly, his carob hues traveled up Dutch's form until they met Dutch's black orbs. "We need to talk." He muttered before glancing to his left. "Bill." He called.

"Huh?" John heard from behind him.

"Get him off the tree, but tie his hands behind his back... Put him in a chair in my tent." Dutch commanded.

"You want me to carry him?" Bill scoffed in distaste.

"He got a bullet in his leg don't he?" Dutch inquired, arching a brow over at the bearded fellow who grumbled something unintelligible under his breath as he pulled out his knife.

Bill made sure to get his blade _dangerously_ close to John's skin, but he never truly cut him to John's relief, for now at least. He couldn't help but groan a little audibly as Bill unceremoniously threw him over his broad shoulder once he was tied back up, he never resisted and he understood their grounds for binding him. He was an outlaw who knew them and their secrets after all... And he deserted them.

When John was put into the chair he grunted once more, his body was sore and throbbing from the massive beating he had received the night before from Arthur as well as Bill and Mac pulling the shots they did once he was down. John couldn't blame them but he also couldn't help voicing his discomfort. Dutch waved Bill out of the tent when he was content and both he and Hosea were quick to take seats in front of him.

Already, John could tell that Hosea was unimpressed while Dutch was reading him like a hawk. They obviously didn't trust him, but they seemed... Different than the night before, and for a moment he was confused why he was brought before him until Dutch held up the paper that Susan had delivered.

"You gonna explain this?" Dutch interrogated.

For a moment, John felt like his windpipe was closing up, this was the first actual conversation he was about to have with the people who were the closest things he ever had to parents... It was almost too much at first, to realize that they were really there, sitting in front of them... He no longer had to hide and pretend he never cared, and he had to deal with their looks of dismay and distrust. It hurt more than the welts he had on his face and the sore abdomen.

He had let go of his anger toward Dutch long ago, and even though seeing him brought up those unpleasant memories that inspired John to leave in the first place, he would never let Dutch know that, especially now that it seemed Dutch was the one fighting for him the most.

"U-Um..." John mumbled for a moment before quickly taking a breath and clearing his throat.

"C'mon, John. If you really wanna prove that you aren't trying to be a snake this is your chance." Hosea mentioned seriously, arching a critical brow at him.

"I-I'm sorry..." John muttered regretfully.

"Just keep it calm and slow..." Dutch tried to encouraged, to which John nodded.

"... A-After about four or five months after I split, I found myself in Reno after a long stint in the wilderness. Made a bit of money off my hunting and was just tryin' to lay low I guess... But I-I got into some trouble and ended up being thrown in one of the holding cells in the area, I don't even remember which one, but... A fine dressed man walked in, dressed in a black suit, real sharp. It was strange, but I didn't think anything of it." John sighed, remembering getting goosebumps from the conversation.

"I was just laying on my cot until I heard him say your name Dutch, said they had been requisitioned in the area specifically because they suspected we may have had something to do with Chief Beckett's murder from an anonymous source, I swear I have no clue who it was." John promised. "Said they were cleanin' up the west so-to-speak, they've been huntin' outlaw gangs under everyone's noses for the last two years or somethin' like that. They're almost like... Private bounty hunters hired by the government and rich folks alike."

"What did you say they were called?" Hosea questioned.

"Pinkerton Detective Agents," John replied with confidence. "Of course, ya'll hadn't been up in that area so the deputy at the time had no information to give him... For a moment I was afraid he'd recognize me, but he left and it got me curious so... That's when I first started to reach out to-" John paused, worried he'd damage Trelawny's trust with the gang due to his own foolishness.

"Josiah." Dutch mentioned, watching John glance up to him quickly. "I could recognize his penmanship anywhere... I'll reserve my judgment on that later, keep goin'."

"R-Right..." John sighed before recalling where he was. "I sent a letter to Ivy's address for him since I wasn't sure where he was at and it didn't surprise me when he didn't reply, but I just... Knew something wasn't right. So I went back to Virginia City and actually went lookin' for him. I knew he and that woman were friends so I was curious if he was still stickin' around, it took me a little while but when I finally tracked him down, he refused to have anything to do with me." He explained. "I was persistent though, and eventually he told me he got my letter and was doing some digging on the subject but hadn't seen any suspicious characters around lately and assumed I was being paranoid, people looked for us all the time."

"... What made Trelawny change his mind?" Hosea asked.

"They showed up at her fuckin' door." John mentioned simply. "Apparently were really careful with their words, and were trying to connect Ivy to the murder but came up short. After our first meeting, I told Josiah that I'd leave him be but if he found anything out I... Well, I pretty much begged him to tell me, because I knew something bad was comin'."

"Do you know their plans? Anything besides this log entry?"

"Not yet... They're really careful Dutch, almost as careful as you... W-Which is why I..." John mumbled, swallowing harshly. "... Josiah was gonna come with me, I was supposed to meet up with him day after tomorrow and we were gonna come here together so he could tell you everything he gathered with me, I know he keeps things from me just for your safety. All I know is they're on their way... I have no clue when they will be here or how many, but they're comin' Dutch, Hosea, I swear it. They will hunt every one of us down like dogs if they can." He urged.

Dutch and Hosea shared a look of concern, but until they spoke to Trelawny and got a taste of what these _federal bounty hunters_ were made of there wasn't much they could do with John's accusations.

"I assume you know where Trelawny is at then yes?" Dutch asked, watching John nod, he took a breath before looking to Hosea once again. "What are you thinkin'?" He asked, and for a minute or so Hosea was silent, staring John down before releasing a breath as well, no matter how disappointed he was in John, he couldn't deny the danger of the situation if it turned out to be true.

"I think... We should get the bullet out of his leg, and when it's time for him to have his meet up with Trelawny, we escort him and get Josiah's side, if Trelawny really thinks these guys are a danger we should probably start doing some digging ourselves and be on high alert. I'm not so ready to move out just because of the gold trade we've been investigating but this definitely poses a problem if it's true." Hosea explained, briefly relieving John as he got up and walked toward him until leaning down, pulling his knife from its sheath and cutting John's bindings, being a bit nicer than Bill but he found feel the veil of tension between them.

"You're releasing him?" Dutch asked curiously.

"Well, I figured if he wanted to hurt us he woulda done it when he shot that cougar at the riverside... That _was_ you wasn't it John?" Hosea inquired, looking down at John who quickly went to rubbing his sore wrists.

"U-Uh yeah... It was." John replied almost bashfully.

"Hm... It was impressive." Hosea commented though it wasn't necessarily a compliment, but more of an observation.

John felt at least a bit of weight come from his shoulders knowing that Dutch and Hosea didn't have any plans to execute him yet and they were at least willing to listen... Arthur on the other hand... That was another story and John wasn't even sure if he even wanted to go there at all. The way Arthur looked at him... He had been prepared for so long to face Arthur and perhaps even confront him but that one look changed everything... He was truly afraid of Arthur.

"I'll go get Susan so we can go about diggin' that bullet out." Dutch mentioned before standing up as well and going to pass John but he quickly reached out and grabbed his wrist, though John was quick to release it.

"W-Wait!" He gasped, but when Dutch looked down to him he paused, but John knew that out of everyone... Dutch and Hosea deserved this. "... I'm sorry."

There was a long moment of silence in the tent as Hosea looked away and Dutch sent a hard stare down at John, but within a few moments, Dutch's eyes softened. Things probably wouldn't be the same between them, but it didn't matter, John _owed_ it to them. He averted his gaze, unable to take the shame that came from admitting his mistake, but he soon felt a warm palm land gently on his shoulder, forcing him to look back up, and even though Dutch wasn't looking at him he nodded.

"... I'm glad you're alive son." He muttered before gently patting his shoulder and taking his leave.

John actually took a breath, finally feeling an immense weight taken off of him, perhaps things weren't completely ruined between him and Dutch like they were with Arthur, but looking up to Hosea, he wasn't convinced the other felt the same. He cast his eyes down to his feet and his words fell silent, knowing there was no excuse that he could give Hosea that would justify ditching them the way he did, even if the man who broke him played a major role, in the end... He was the one that left, not Arthur.

Hosea didn't know what to say, he couldn't in good conscience confront John about the affair with Arthur just because that wasn't his fight, but he couldn't help the disappointment he felt in John. Arthur had a point... With deserters in the past, if they were found they were either killed or kicked out with nothing. Looking back on it now, Hosea wasn't exactly proud of it just because of the situation they found themselves in now, but why _should_ John be different? Because they raised him..?

"... I don't know what you expect from me, John." Hosea finally sighed.

"I-I don't expect anything... Honest." John replied.

"Honest huh..?" Hosea couldn't help but question with a small snort of distaste. "We'll see about that." He mused before brushing passed John and leaving him behind in Dutch's tent for John to wallow in his regret.

Thankfully it wasn't long before Dutch walked back into the tent with Susan and Mary-Beth in tow.

"H-Hey there, John." Mary-Beth couldn't help but greet in her optimistically timid fashion, catching his attention.

"Hey, Mary-Beth." John greeted in reply, just relieved that at least someone was happy to see him despite the apologetic look Mary-Beth flashed at Susan when she received an iron hot glare from her.

"... Alright John, you're gonna have to lay down and drop 'em." She mentioned motioning to his trousers.

"P-Pardon?" John questioned.

"You heard me." Susan replied, not willing to take any nonsense.

Knowing that he shouldn't push his luck with her, John sighed now regretting that Mary-Beth was here at all now that she was going to get a view of his whole ass, but he didn't complain. He was ready to have this bullet out of him anyway, but he stood up carefully, making sure not to put too much weight on his injured leg before he loosened up his belt and laid down on top of Dutch's cot on his stomach so Susan could dig into the entrance wound.

"It's not as angry as I thought it would be." Susan scoffed softly, and John braced himself knowing she was probably going to make this as painful as possible for him.

The process took about twenty horrible excruciating minutes, but eventually, John heard the piece of metal _clack_ onto the floor to which he responded with a sigh of relief though the alcohol that was poured into the wound had him gritting his teeth roughly. He groaned softly but gasped out a sigh of relief when he finally felt Mary-Beth's kind hands placing the bandage over the afflicted area.

"How are you feelin' John?" Mary-Beth inquired.

"Hush up!" Susan hissed as John made sure he was turned away before redressing.

"As good as can be expected... I-I know you're probably not supposed to be talkin' to me but... Thank you." He said, nodding to both Susan and Mary-Beth.

While he expected Miss Grimshaw to scorn him, which she did, he was pleasantly surprised to see Mary-Beth flash a kind smile at him before the two of them departed the tent in silence. When John was left alone once again he reached up and ran a hand through the dark locks that cascaded down his shoulders. At first, he wasn't sure he'd be able to walk out and face everyone, but he couldn't hide from it. He'd have to build their trust back little by little and accept their punishment in return.

Truly he felt like the omega of a pack of wolves... And in a way he was.

Taking a slow and deep inhale, John finally took a step into the sun, squinting for a moment but once his eyes adjusted he nearly reclused back into the tent when he saw all the eyes land on him, some more friendly than others but in the corner of his eye he saw Dutch waving him toward the firepit while John's eyes kept searching for Abigail out of habit. She was still nowhere to be found but that was to be expected... John limped toward Dutch and Hosea, knowing his leg would be screaming for the next couple of days at least but he wouldn't complain.

"Are you stayin' close to here..?" Dutch inquired.

"Uh sorta, I'm kinda just in the middle of nowhere..." John replied.

"... Mac and Davey are gonna escort you back so you can pack up, I wanna be able to keep an eye on you... When you leave camp you will be accompanied by someone, or you won't leave at all, am I understood?" Dutch asked, his eyes sharper than a blade.

"Y-... You're letting me back..?" John asked hesitantly, but Dutch shook his head.

"No... You'll be situated across the river, every night you'll be watched over to make sure you aren't runnin' off or talkin' to people you shouldn't be." Dutch mentioned, arching a brow at John, and while he wanted to assure Dutch that this wasn't necessary John nodded with compliance.

"Okay..." He muttered, but he looked up to Dutch with just the smallest sheen of hope in his eyes. "Thank you." He said.

"Don't thank me until I can cool Arthur off." Dutch replied before brushing past John with a look of slight exasperation.

John flinched at Dutch's words and stood motionless for a few moments as he processed that his biggest enemy used to be the man he was in love with more than anything in the world. He didn't even remember what it was like to feel that raw sense of devotion toward someone. However, before long he was roughly shoved toward the direction of Gypsy who they had captured after John's assault.

"Let's go." Davey scoffed. "I ain't waiting for you all day."

John sucked up his pride and managed to bite his tongue before walking toward his horse. He knew riding was going to be rough on his leg, he'd have to try and find some alcohol if he could to numb himself before bed.

Dutch's eyes followed John's form out of the camp, he knew people would be asking questions and it was best to address everyone at once. Though he decided to spare John that humiliation, figuring that this whole ordeal was punishment enough on _that_ front. He reached up and slicked his hair back in a stressed-out fashion before walking toward Hosea's tent where he was sitting outside reading with a rather sour look on his expression.

"... You know we can't stay mad at him forever." Dutch sighed as he plopped himself in a seat next to Hosea.

"I never said I was mad at him." Hosea replied shortly.

"Your face says otherwise." Dutch commented.

"I'm not angry... I'm disappointed, I'm hurt, I'm... I don't know what I am." Hosea finally admitted as he slapped his book shut and reached up to rub his eyes tiredly.

"... What do you think of all this... Honestly?" Dutch then asked quietly out of earshot from anyone who could have been listening in.

"... I don't know that either. I'm... Suddenly not feeling so confident on this job. Do you think we should just cut our losses and run?" Hosea inquired back.

"Nah I don't think we should go that far yet... But I know everyone is gonna be askin' the same thing and no matter what we're not gonna make everyone happy." Dutch muttered as he leaned back in his seat.

"You mean Arthur?" Hosea questioned.

"Well, not just him but... He is the biggest danger to John. I ain't ever seen him like that..." Dutch mentioned with a troubled expression.

"... He'll have to deal with it, like it or not if all this proves true and it was John who brought this to our attention... It would be a fool's choice to reject him." Hosea muttered.

"I'm pleasantly surprised to hear you say that my friend." Dutch mused but Hosea quickly shook his head.

"I never said I was happy about it, I was just statin' facts... No use dwelling on my personal feelings for the matter though, you should probably go address everyone before John gets back, we'll fill Mac and Davey in later." Hosea stated with a nod from Dutch before the other stood and began venturing toward the fireplace before clapping his hands a few times.

"Can I get everyone's attention? Gather 'round please!" He implored, and he wasn't shocked to see that people were eager to hear his opinion on the matter of John. "... So I know things have... Changed in the last day, and I'm not gonna beat around the bush about it. John is back... And with him, came some vital information valuable to our safety. I don't know everyone's personal feelings on the matter, but right now, John should be seen as an ally." He explained.

"What!?" Bill snarled.

"You gotta be kiddin' Dutch," Javier growled. "How long was he gone? A year?"

"I'm not asking anyone to let go of the hurt... But if what John has told Hosea and me to be true, he will have more than proven himself worthy of becomin' a brother again. I know it hurts, I know you're angry... But all I ask is that you keep your guns holstered alright? I'm not askin' you to welcome him back with open arms." Dutch clarified.

Hosea couldn't help but roll his eyes and chuckle softly to himself from where he sat. Dutch sure had a way with words and he had a way with people's feelings. Already he could feel the tension around camp beginning to dampen and while it would take a long time to get back to normal, especially with John coming around, he could see sour looks softening... At least for now.

* * *

Abigail had been doing whatever she could to avoid John for obvious reasons. For a while, she had hidden in her tent, but knowing she couldn't stay in there all day, she soon took Jack down by the riverside, though this time she had at least a little bit of adequate protection... If Uncle was good for that. Even though she and the old hermit didn't always see eye to eye on a lot of things, she had to admit his company was a welcome distraction from the mess going on at camp.

"... Curious how babies always seem so happy don't they?" Uncle mentioned from beside her, somewhat surprising Abigail who jumped in response and glanced over to the old man who peered down at Jack wiggling happily on the blanket she laid out for them. "Somethin' on your mind?"

"As if it ain't on yours too." Abigail scoffed softly but glancing back to her baby she couldn't help smiling. "... I hope that light never leaves his eyes." She then sighed.

"It will... Always does."

"Always the optimist Uncle." Abigail snorted, but the pleasant expression soon left her face.

"... You thinkin' about John?" He inquired, watching a frown cross her visage.

"How could I not..? How does he just... Come back and try to suddenly make up for things that can't be made up for..?" She asked.

"It's only up to you if they can be made up for ya know... We all make mistakes." Uncle mused before subtly motioning to Jack, however, as he saw the familiar motherly rage igniting in her eyes he quickly put his hands up in surrender. "O-Or in this case, happy accidents." He quickly defended.

Despite wanting to be angry at Uncle for his callous remark... He _was_ right in a sense. Jack _was_ an accident, though Abigail would never tell him that. Some mistakes were bigger than others and some lasted for life... Only time would have to tell in John's mistake would last that long.

However, the sound of thundering hooves soon caught her and Uncle's attention, he quickly readied his rifle that he carried just in case but he was relieved at seeing Mac, Davey, and John come out of the trees. Abigail gasped softly and quickly turned away, her heart feeling like it was agonizing when she looked at him. John sighed softly not knowing which was worse, Arthur's hatred or Abigail's rejection of his presence.

"Across over there, let's go." Mac ordered, however Uncle was quick to wave them down.

"Why don't you two head back? I got this." He offered, watching Davey send a slightly pointed look at him.

"... Why? You never offer to do _anything_." He replied.

"Well, I am now... I can always stop in the future." Uncle snorted, watching Mac and Davey roll their eyes respectively. "You can escort this lovely young lady back to camp while you're at it."

"Watch it old man." Davey hissed but looked to Abigail. "You comin' then or not?" He asked, watching Abigail nod in silence before she reached down and grabbed the blanket from the ground haphazardly before beginning to follow the twins back while John sat atop Gypsy watching them walk away.

John averted his eyes and took a breath.

"John."

Gasping quietly, John quickly looked toward Abigail... She wasn't looking at him, but her stride stopped.

"... Y-Yes?"

"... Thank you for saving me and my son." She replied before finally turning and meeting his gaze for the first time since he had returned, had he been standing himself he would have felt weak in the knees.

"You're welcome."

There were no more words shared as Abigail turned back away and started following back after Mac and Davey. John thought his heart might pound out of his chest from that interaction but... He finally allowed just the smallest of smiles to grace his lips, however he soon turned his attention to the grey-bearded man who was grinning at him.

"What?" He scoffed softly.

"Now, now, I wouldn't talk like that to one of the few people who wasn't lookin' for an excuse to shoot me." Uncle reminded insufferably, making John groan softly knowing he'd milk this for as long as he could. "Let's go then lover-boy."

John's grasp on his reins tightened briefly, this was the worst punishment he could have received... But he kicked Gypsy across the river as Uncle followed behind him. As predicted, he sat on his ass while John readied his camp, though he reminded himself that at this point, even Uncle held a higher status than him, which pained him his pride to no end. He could see the geezer peering at him from his right and John soon turned a glare over at him.

"... Why are you starin' at me?" He asked once he got his fire started.

"Oh, no reason... You're just a lot better at that then you used to be is all." Uncle replied as he took a seat near John.

While John hated Uncle's aloof attitude and his unwillingness to do anything... Like Abigail, he was a welcome distraction and John continued to remind himself over and over that this man that he often treated like shit even in his youth had _no_ obligation to be nice to him under any circumstances.

"... Thanks." John replied before he slowly lowered his body to the ground, noting the sun was beginning to set.

A grimace took over John's features for a moment as a pang tore through his lower limb but he managed to get into a comfortable position and sigh softly in relief.

"Oh yeah, Arthur shot ya huh?" Uncle asked with just the smallest bit of amusement.

"Yeah." John sighed, wanting to think of anything _but_ Arthur.

"Coulda been worse I guess given how hard you kicked him... You sure got moxie I'll give ya that." He chuckled before reaching into his satchel and digging around.

"Yeah well, moxie doesn't really matter when I'm trying to keep a low profile now does it?" John scoffed.

"What were you doin' by the way? Actin' all mysterious and cagey... Ain't like you." Uncle replied.

"To avoid this _exact_ scenario." John huffed before leaning his head back.

"Now that's not nice to someone who was about to give you some booze." Uncle mentioned, watching John snap his eyes back open and look over him with indignation.

"Alright, alright you're right I'm sorry." John grumbled as he reached up and rubbed his forehead. "I've just been alone for so long I-... I guess it's just taking a little gettin' used to again." He muttered.

"... That's the worst kinda life." Uncle sighed, catching John's attention as he looked up to the sky that began to sparkle with all kinds of light. "It feels meaningless, don't it?" He asked.

John blinked and stared over before he averted his gaze, but eventually, he nodded. However, feeling a small nudge at his arm John looked over to see Uncle holding out a flask with a kind expression. He hesitated but he reached over and took the metal object with a timid nod of thanks before taking a quick swig but quickly winced and coughed.

"The hell is this!?" He groaned.

"I dunno, I think whiskey..?" Uncle asked as he rubbed his beard. "... Maybe it's vinegar." He mumbled, however seeing the rather priceless look on John's face he honked a laugh. "... Gotcha." He then said.

John blinked but once again... A small smile crept back onto his expression and he took another swig, at least he was prepared this time around.

> I feel like I don't know you anymore  
> Whoa-Whoa  
> It feels like I don't know you anymore  
> Whoa-Whoa  
> But do you think that you could forgive me?  
> I know I made too many mistakes  
> Do you thing that you could forgive me?  
> All the times that I made you break
> 
>   
> She said that she don't know me anymore  
> Whoa-Whoa  
> She said that she don't trust me anymore  
> Whoa-Whoa  
> But do you think that you could forgive me?  
> I know I made too many mistakes
> 
>   
> But when she says she wish she didn't know me anymore  
> That's what hurts the most
> 
>   
> But can you see that I'm trying?  
> Can you see that I'm tired  
> Of all the lying?  
> So hard to fight it  
> Can you see that I'm tired  
> Of all the hiding?
> 
>   
> Can you see I'm so tired baby?  
> Can't you see  
> I'm so tired of this?  
> Can't you see  
> I'm tired?
> 
>   
> I like it when no one knows I care at all  
> Whoa-Whoa  
> Yeah  
> It makes me look strong but it's just a wall and walls fall  
> Yeah
> 
>   
> But do you think that you could forgive me?  
> I know I made too many mistakes  
> Do you think that you could forgive me?  
> All the times that I made you break
> 
>   
> I feel like I don't know you anymore  
> Whoa-Whoa  
> I wish that I could still call you like before  
> Oh- no -Whoa  
> But can you see that I'm trying?  
> Can you see that I'm tired  
> Of all the lying?  
> So hard to fight it  
> Can you see that I'm tired  
> Of all the hiding?
> 
>   
> But can you see that I'm trying?  
> Can you see that I'm tired  
> Of all the lying?  
> So hard to fight it  
> Can you see that I'm tired  
> Of all the hiding?
> 
> source: [Anymore by Kayden](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEEtxoY5gxo&ab_channel=AminiumMusic)


	19. Surrender

When Arthur's ocean hues began to flutter open, for a moment he was confused. Where was he? Where did he end up the night previous? Thankfully the memories of the drunken rambling with Vincent came flooding back along with the searing headache that pounded at his head. He groaned audibly and turned over onto his side away from the window to avoid the bit of light that escaped through the curtains. However, when he did that, immediate nausea nearly had Arthur dashing toward the kitchen and he swallowed harshly before curling into a ball as he pinched his eyes shut.

Upon opening them again only when the wave of queasiness passed Arthur arched a brow as he noticed a glass of water sitting on the nightstand and as he peeked over the edge of the bed, Vincent had even brought him a bucket in case he needed to hurl... Arthur _definitely_ didn't deserve him. Thinking back to exactly what they talked about, he was a bit fuzzy making him frown, he remembered going to the bar and drinking, that much was very clear but... All he remembered after that was Vincent bringing him back to the house.

_I used to lay awake at night... Wonderin' where my Johnny boy was and he just... He wasn't there no more..._

Arthur suddenly gasped, no... He couldn't have talked about John, could he? Did he really out himself to Vincent? True, it was rather obvious of his orientation toward Vincent at this point but... At the same time, he didn't want Vincent to think there was something there with John that wasn't anymore. Sweat formed at Arthur's brow, worrying he may have fucked his relationship with Vincent up entirely but he was quick to calm down and think rationally.

If Vincent had truly been upset about his relationship with John he wouldn't have held up Arthur in his room or provided him with the water that he so desperately needed. Taking a breath, Arthur grunted as he slowly pushed himself into the seated position, trying to will away the nausea that was rising fast. He ended up gagging once but managed to keep it down long enough to take a swig of water and endured long enough to sate the boiling in his stomach for the moment. He didn't even know what time it was and he was hesitant to check the bedside clock.

Arthur took his time finishing the water and taking care not to chug it too quickly and risk throwing it back up. He reached up with his hands and gently rubbed his eyes as he desperately tried not to think about his throbbing head. Eventually, though, Arthur turned to allow his legs to swing off the edge of the bed. He felt like there were rocks in his body weighing him down, but he looked over to the clock and groaned.

It was nearly eleven, it was definitely time to get up. He ended up venturing into the kitchen to get a few more glasses of water before he even thought about going outside and didn't end up poking his head out until about noon. Arthur was feeling significantly better being hydrated but he still felt like complete shit and knew his headache would probably last for a while, at least he didn't feel like vomiting anymore.

When the sun hit Arthur's face he actually stumbled back just slightly as an arm came up quickly to shield his face, he would have to go looking for his hat soon. However, despite the physical discomfort, Arthur started his trek forward looking for Vincent. Thankfully even though the sun was bright, there was a chill to the air, it was getting closer to the end of the year after all.

Glancing into the barn, Arthur almost kept walking but he could see a form sitting down against the back wall. There he was... Reading a book peacefully. The barn had been cleaned up from his father's slaying and Vincent seemed to be doing remarkably better but Arthur couldn't help feeling like a jackass after last night when Vincent was the one who really needed the support.

Seeing his form walk inside, Vincent's eyes turned upward and a pleasant expression took over his features. He slowly closed his book and placed it aside and pushed himself up, wincing only slightly.

"Hey, I was just about to go check on you." He chuckled in good humor as Arthur approached, managing to make the older man blush.

"Y-Yeah... Sorry about that... Are you alright?" Arthur inquired, furrowing his brows slightly.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, my horse got spooked this mornin' and threw me, still tryin' to get over it." Vincent sighed before shrugging as he looked up to Arthur's eyes. "... But I feel like I should be the one askin' you that question." He then mentioned, leaning against the wall and looking up at Arthur expectantly. "I was worried ya know..."

Arthur sighed and averted his gaze, the shame he felt in bringing his problems to Vincent was almost too much to handle at first, but remembering that Vincent was an outsider in this aspect of his life... He recalled that he didn't _have_ to tell Vincent anything, and he had already gotten the feeling that Vincent wasn't interrogating him anyway, he was just concerned.

"I-I guess... I should ask what I said first." He murmured, his face only getting redder by the second as he watched a sweet smile creeping onto Vincent's expression, he was hoping it wasn't as bad as he thought it was but Arthur knew not to bank on that.

"... Here, why don't we head to the house..? I need to sit down on something better for my back and I don't think you'd wanna have this conversation here." He chuckled softly as a free hand reached around a bit to rub at the soreness.

Arthur nodded with a look of slight relief and was quick to follow Vincent as they trekked back toward the house. He couldn't help looking around a bit just checking to see if any of the remaining hands were looking at him strangely, he knew he should have been thankful that Vincent found him and brought him back to the house, but he just hoped he didn't make himself out to be an idiot. There didn't seem to be any stares and before he knew it, they were walking inside the empty house and gently closing the door behind them. Arthur was still in his own mind until he heard a small hiss erupt from Vincent's lips as he leaned a bit against the wall.

"Sorry, I'm fine." Vincent sighed.

"You sure? You don't look fine." Arthur murmured as he reached out and ran his hand through Vincent's hair affectionately.

"Y-Yeah, at least I will be, I just wasn't expecting it is all... It wasn't that bad." He assured with a nod as he leaned into the touch as always. "Although, I could use a shot of that whiskey I bought for us... I assume you'll pass?" He asked with a hint of amusement as Arthur groaned at just the mention of alcohol.

"Yes. I will." He muttered but followed Vincent back into his room where he reached into the side drawer and pulled out the whiskey that they hadn't gotten the chance to crack open yet.

Vincent parked himself on the bed with a small exhale while he got the bottle open. Arthur on the other hand stood by the doorway and leaned into it as he watched the other... Just impressed with how much his actions seemed to affect his heart without him doing anything at all. Vincent was a gentle man by nature, Arthur could tell with the way he clutched the lid before it gave away and popped off, especially after all he had gone through... He spared Myles after all.

When Vincent finally felt the eyes on him and looked up he quickly motioned Arthur to come closer and scooted over on the slightly disheveled mattress and of course, Arthur couldn't resist. He trudged forwarded and lowered himself next to the man that he was certain at this point had his heart in his palm.

"So... Last night." Vincent mused with a small amused expression as he looked over to Arthur, however when Arthur didn't smile back and looked forward his expression fell a bit, reaching over he gently enclosed Arthur's hand in his own, making Arthur's heart melt as he looked over once again to see that worried expression... He reminded Arthur of Abigail.

"... I don't deserve you." Arthur replied as the smallest of smiles graced his lips, however as he remembered the events of the night prior that led him to drink he felt his heart being torn into pieces all over again. "W-What kind of drunken ramblings did I get into?" he finally asked, lightening up a bit as he hoped he didn't have to go too into detail.

Vincent could see the hurt hiding in Arthur's eyes, and he had seen it the night before when he spoke of this _Johnny Boy_ as he so affectionately called him... But was it right to probe Arthur about his obviously painful past? He finally sighed knowing it was best to be honest.

"Well, at first you were pretty obstinate." he managed to muse with a small grin as he recalled Arthur laying on his back in the bar. "My uncle sent someone to let me know you were getting hammered and it was probably best to come to pick you up, you were laid out on the floor but when I finally got you back here..." He trailed off, recalling Arthur basically throwing himself at him, though he remembered it fondly. "You were pretty friendly toward me." He mused, flashing a smirk over at Arthur.

"God..." Arthur groaned softly as he reached up and rubbed his eyes, hearing Vincent cackle softly before taking a swig of the whiskey, after taking a couple of swallows he sighed and placed the bottle over onto the nightstand.

"... But you weren't yourself." He then sighed with a small frown before looking over to meet Arthur's eyes. "You said someone broke your heart." He admitted, watching Arthur's face contort with regret as he looked away again, however, he felt Vincent's hand squeeze his quickly making his heart clench.

Vincent felt guilty seeing the many emotions going through Arthur's eyes but watching the other look back and his intense oceans soften, Vincent smiled sheepishly.

"... I don't think less of you, ya know." He reassured, watching Arthur chuckle exhaustedly for a moment.

"That's good..." He mentioned, but Vincent could tell there was something else.

"... But that's not all." He added, watching Arthur look back over before shrugging and shaking his head.

"I-I don't want you to think it's something... Else." He muttered, just speaking of it made him nearly feel sick again.

"... It was though, wasn't it?" Vincent asked, his tone calm and careful, treading as lightly as he could, but he could see plainly that Arthur didn't want to speak of it, Vincent finally took a breath. "If you don't remember what you said to me... You probably don't remember what I said to you." He explained, noticing Arthur glance back over at him with confusion as a blush began to turn his face red with embarrassment of his own. "... B-Before I met you, hell back before I ever even really knew what I was... I was with Myles." He stated, watching the light bulb go off in the other's head.

Yes, he remembered it once Vincent had said it again, but only vaguely. It made some sense after all considering how Vincent acted when he spoke about him. It was surprising considering what an asshole Myles became even though on some level that _also_ made some sense. He never accepted it like Vincent did.

"So... Don't feel like you're the only one who's made some mistakes." Vincent assured as he intertwined Arthur's fingers with his own. "I won't force you to come out with it, but... If you want to, I'll always listen." He promised with the smile that always broke Arthur's defenses.

_John leaving was **not** your fault..._

_The longer you deny this part of yourself, the more you'll lose who you are and the more miserable you'll become. Holding on to what's normal doesn't work for everyone._

All Arthur could hear was Hosea's voice parroting in his head over and over again... He could fall into old habits and push Vincent away... Or for once be honest like he was with Hosea and maybe become even closer with him. Given how patient Vincent had been with him, Arthur felt that he almost deserved to hear what had been holding him back this whole time, even if it felt like a knife in his gut.

Taking a breath, a slow and clear one... Arthur turned and looked forward before he spoke.

"... His name is John." He confessed before his eyes fluttered shut. "... I've known him for almost as long as I can remember, he's about your age. It wasn't until about... Five years or so ago when we started feeling... Different toward each other." He sighed as his eyes opened, he had never told this story to anyone. "One of my mentors had a woman, a _wonderful_ woman... It's funny, she was younger than me and yet she's one of the few people who ever felt like a mother to me but she was murdered." He explained, recalling Annabelle's death in gruesome detail through his eyes.

_Take the girl, Dutch._

Arthur gritted his teeth for a moment but he calmed quickly, it was a long time ago now.

"After that I-... I broke things off." He admitted, remembering his greatest regret, the way John looked at him was etched in his mind. "It was too painful knowing I couldn't protect ones I cared about, my son, her, just..." Arthur paused having to shake off the emotions threatening to overwhelm him, but all through it, he felt Vincent's hand embracing his own. "... And then he met a girl."

Arthur thought very carefully, he wondered if it was worth telling Vincent about Jack, but he remembered that now... He wasn't Jack's father. Jack was Abigail's son, and nothing more. Having John back didn't change that... But that didn't mean he would just let John try to mosey his way into that kid's life either.

"She got pregnant and it changed everything..."

_The only thing I know is you're just like the rest of them as soon as responsibility comes knocking!_

_I didn't want this..._

When Arthur looked back, even when he was with Dutch... He still felt so fucking lonely watching John be happy on the outside. It was so painful watching him move on even though Arthur himself had ended their relationship... But he accepted it and gave John the space he craved. He had worked his way into John's heart all over again to ruin it with getting Abigail pregnant.

"Funny enough, that was about the time we finally reconciled," Arthur muttered, though his voice was devoid of humor. "It didn't last... We were doin' our jobs like always and he had been acting odd that day... But I never thought he woulda-..." Arthur stopped as he felt his throat close up as he recalled walking into John's tent and seeing it stripped bare of everything he owned.

_Why don't you come by my tent later? We can talk then._

Arthur bit his lip out of anger as he felt the ball forming in the back of his throat. Seeing John had brought up all of those bitter feelings of betrayal and guilt once again to be shoved in his face... His failures.

"And one day he just left... Without me..." Arthur murmured barely above a whisper.

Vincent had sat quietly listening to Arthur in the dimness of the bedroom, the quiet annunciating the pain in Arthur's tone. It was raw and gut-wrenching, he could even feel Arthur's hand beginning to tremble in his own. He remembered their conversation the night previous and couldn't help but avert his gaze.

"... You must have really loved him." He muttered.

"... I did." Arthur confessed, but a bitter smile soon replaced his expression. "But after all that... The lies, abandonin' family and the kid... Abandonin' me... He just showed up last night spyin' on us, I caught that fucker red-handed." He stated, the fresh anger still clearly transparent in his voice.

"Yikes... Do you have any idea what he wants?" Vincent questioned, looking back over with some shock.

Arthur paused, remembering that he had to keep his criminal activity from Vincent. He shrugged, recalling John's words about some kind of detective government agent... It sounded like a load of shit anyway.

"No idea yet... Hell, and my mentors want to act like he _hasn't_ been gone a year." He scoffed.

"Wow, a whole year?" Vincent asked.

"Yeah... I suppose that explains my... Actions last night, but it doesn't excuse 'em. I hope I didn't make you look bad." He said with a frown of regret, but hearing Vincent chuckle Arthur looked over with a surprised expression.

"Well, my father might have had some choice words but... Not me." He mused, though the enjoyment soon fell from his face since he was still mourning his father, this time Arthur was the one to squeeze Vincent's hand.

"... I want you to know somethin'." Arthur then said, catching Vincent's attention.

Though, before Arthur spoke, he released Vincent's hand so that he could reach up and caress his cheek with admiration behind his actions. Even with John back at camp... All Arthur could think about now was the beautiful man in his presence, and even after that torturous retelling of his greatest regret and source of hurt... Vincent was still there smiling at him.

He could sit here and tell Vincent how much he appreciated him and how lost he would be without him but... The best way to prove how he felt about him was to show him.

With that thought in his mind, Arthur slowly leaned in and pressed his lips against Vincent's, feeling all of his past mistakes and regrets turning into dust before him as he felt Vincent lean into the gesture. This time though... Arthur wouldn't stop with just a kiss.

He couldn't wait any longer... Soon, Arthur's tongue was dancing with Vincent's, and the hand that was resting upon his cheek carefully traveled down and stopped at his thigh. Vincent didn't stop himself from wrapping his arms around Arthur's neck and pulling him closer, only when the need to breathe properly was unbearable did they separate. Catching their breaths slowly in time with one another, Arthur's piercing cobalt orbs met Vincent's equally striking silver hues and for a moment time seemed to pause.

Whatever this was... Arthur was giving into it, and it seemed that Vincent was too.

The hand that was positioned on Vincent's thigh began to nudge at it and guide him into position, making Vincent carefully swing his legs up onto the bed and moving quickly so that Arthur was between them and laying Vincent down onto his back. All at once, Arthur forgot about his headache as he burrowed his face into the other's neck and once more sampling the skin that Arthur always craved to feel against his own.

Reaching up and around him, Vincent's slender digits soon found themselves entangling with Arthur's locks that always seemed to flow down Arthur's shoulders like a waterfall. His hair was always so soft and thick, he could run his hands through it all day and never tire of it. Arthur's lips rarely stayed in one place for too long, they traveled the expense of his flesh and savored every moment.

Eventually, Vincent flinched slightly as a blush began to form on his face for an entirely different reason. When Arthur finally pulled back, huffing out short breaths and finally got a look at the other's more alluring expression as he gathered his composure once more. Arthur's eyes took their time slowly running up and down Vincent's form, even with clothes on he was still one of the most attractive people that Arthur got the privilege to bed.

Inhaling slowly, the hand that wasn't supporting Arthur's weight reached up to caress Vincent's cheek before surfing down and beginning to calmly unbutton his shirt, watching for any signs of discomfort or hesitance... But there were none, though his hand paused anyway and his eyes soon honed in on the other's arm.

"... Your arm." He muttered quietly, Vincent blinked with confusion for a moment but recalling what stopped them last time he smiled.

"It's much better..." He whispered back before his once injured hand reached up and took over for Arthur in unbuttoning his shirt with ease.

A smile reappeared on Arthur's lips as Vincent spared no time in exposing himself for Arthur's viewing pleasure, to which he greatly appreciated. Arthur's free hand swiftly finished opening up Vincent's shirt and like before his eyes fell upon the blank canvas that was Vincent's body. The only thing that was different now was his arm, the only scars to grace his once unmarred body. Though to Arthur... They just added to his beauty.

"God..." Arthur sighed before leaning in quickly to bite at Vincent's neck.

The other gasped softly at the unexpected pain but feeling Arthur suck on the bite sight and drawing out the pain, turning it into something else. Vincent's eyes eventually fluttered shut as he felt his skin ignite with heat against Arthur's lips. Feeling how perfect Arthur felt between his legs, Vincent let a small breath escape from him as he felt Arthur move downward toward his chest.

Like before Arthur was drawn to the particularly sensitive buds of nerves stationed on Vincent's chest. He felt Vincent wince at his tongue grazing one of them and once he circled it with the tip, Arthur sucked it into his mouth with no difficulty whatsoever. He finally got a more primal reaction from the man beneath him, feeling him inhale sharply and released a slightly struggled whimper, he was trying to hold it in. Now that his hand was free from undressing Vincent, Arthur's palm ran down his exposed torso and soon rested upon Vincent's groin.

"A-Arthur..." Vincent muttered, catching Arthur's attention. "Y-You never play fair." He huffed with a small pout.

"How so..?" Arthur crooned with a smirk.

"C'mon if you think I'm gonna trust you after what you pulled in the storage room you're sorely mistaken." Vincent snickered but his eyes soon shifted over. "And... We should probably close the door just to be safe."

Arthur glanced over before looking back with a grin that charmed Vincent to his deepest core.

"I suppose you're right... And I'd hate for you to think I'm anything but a fair man." He mused before pushing himself up and off of Vincent.

However, when Arthur turned away and walked toward the door, he reached up and began to undo the buttons on his own shirt. He shut the door gently but made sure the lock was in place before venturing over to the window, the curtains were closed and only a sliver of light remained but Arthur wasn't taking chances. When he shut it completely he turned toward Vincent just in time to allow his shirt to fall and finally reveal himself to Vincent in a more intimate fashion once again.

While Arthur had been making sure their private business stayed private, Vincent went to work on unbuckling his jeans and tossing his shirt from the bed. Upon the other's approach, a smirk seemed to slither over Vincent's lips as he beckoned Arthur closer, who didn't wait on climbing back onto the bed. This time though, after positioning himself between Vincent's legs he sat up and knelt between them, looking over the younger man all over again.

There were large blotchy red scars on Vincent's shoulder that lead down his arm, but all that mattered to Arthur was that they no longer hurt, seeing the other's eyes glance over to the affected limb, hesitance washed over his expression again though he said nothing. Arthur reached in and ran his fingers through Vincent's hair before allowing his hand to fall and gently caress the scarring.

"... You know there ain't anything that can deter me from you, right?" Arthur asked, watching Vincent blush but smile nervously.

"Don't tempt me to test that." He chuckled but relaxed against Arthur's touch, who smiled with amusement.

Arthur's eyes couldn't help but take in Vincent's form over and over again, the way his chest rose and fell in time with his breaths along with his sculpted abdomen. He was undoubtedly gorgeous and Arthur knew he'd do whatever it took to make Vincent felt it. Noting that his pants were open, Arthur didn't waste time in reaching inside and taking ahold of Vincent's semi-hard member.

Unable to help the flinch, Vincent leaned his head back more comfortably and took a breath as he prepared himself for more of Arthur's merciless teasing. Slowly, almost torturously, Arthur's hand slid up the shaft and up to the tip, drawing as much blood as he could with the single pull. Vincent hated how much his body seemed to love Arthur playing him like a fiddle.

Arthur's eyes honed in on Vincent's mouth as he noticed him beginning to bite into his bottom lip. He couldn't stop himself from wanting to taste the other and quickly leaning down, Arthur's lips captured Vincent's in his own and his tongue didn't waste time in fighting the other's for dominance. Vincent threw his arms around Arthur's neck and held him tightly, though one of his hands sneakily ran down Arthur's chest and soon began to prod and pull at Arthur's belt.

Pulling back with a small huff, Arthur glanced down only briefly until a grin resurfaced on his face.

"Are you trying to tell me something..?" He asked softly before sitting himself back up and noting Vincent's playful glare.

"You know damn well what I'm trying to tell you..." He mused.

"Oh..? I think you'll have to spell it out for me." Arthur replied before carefully maneuvering Vincent's dick from his trousers.

Arthur wasn't about to allow Vincent to get away with mouthing off to him after all, reaching up, Arthur spat into his palm to give his hand proper lubrication. Without holding Vincent in limbo any longer, Arthur's fingers rewrapped themselves around his shaft before starting a solid rhythm pumping his hand up and down. The reaction was almost immediate, Vincent winced and released a small whine.

"That's right..." Arthur hummed with a grin, finally allowing himself to let go and enjoy this for what it was.

"God, Arthur you better not leave me hangin' this time..." Vincent finally huffed as the blush began to consume the rest of his face.

"Oh trust me... There's nowhere I'd rather be." Arthur purred in response as he focused on Vincent's expression.

Vincent's chest started rising and falling faster as Arthur's rhythm quickened, wanting to keep Vincent just on the cusp of release but never allowing him to get there... At least not yet. His thumb paid special attention to the head, using the pad to circle it while he drove his hips forward into the other so he could feel Arthur's hardness for himself, clothing or not.

"A-Arthur if you don't stop..." Vincent panted, sweat forming at his brow and his eyes fluttering shut.

"Well, we wouldn't want to spoil the fun early now, would we?" Arthur inquired, feeling pre-cum beginning to gather at the head of Vincent's cock. "Especially when I haven't even gotten your pants off."

His hand slowed to a stop, but his thumb still teased at the head, watching Vincent's eyes open to look up at him with a grin. Arthur's eyes couldn't be taken off of Vincent's they were always such a marvel to look at.

"... Then what are we waitin' for?" Vincent replied, catching Arthur only slightly off guard.

"Your back..?" Arthur inquired playfully, recalling that Vincent had been thrown earlier in the day.

"You know, surprisingly I seem to have forgotten all about that." He chortled in response as Arthur backed away from him and took hold of his waistband.

Taking his time, Arthur pulled Vincent's jeans off his body and exposing him at such a leisurely pace that Arthur thought his erection would burst at first. Though when he stepped off the bed for a moment so he could finish undressing as well, when he turned back he was pleasantly surprised to see that Vincent had slipped beneath the blankets and motioned to join him.

Without hesitation, Arthur slid himself within the blankets and soon found himself rolling on top of Vincent once again. It was so different feeling their bodies against each other this way, but it was something Arthur wouldn't trade for anything. He ran his hand slowly up Vincent's waist and caressed his skin gently, leading his fingers up into the curly golden locks that were Vincent's signature. Arthur could feel familiar hands roaming his back as well as entangling in his own mane of brunette. He had forgotten what it was like to feel so close to someone... Not even Abigail could stir this passion within him.

Leaning down, Arthur rested his forehead against Vincent's and smiling openly down at the young man who Arthur was _sure_ could have gotten much better... And yet Vincent chose him. His argent gaze always made butterflies erupt in Arthur's stomach and his heart clench painfully.

Remembering what he was doing, Arthur's smile turned back into a smirk as his hand ventured back beneath the blankets. Wrapping his fingers around their combined lengths, Arthur's hand resumed it's stroking and Vincent's enticing expression returned. If Arthur was being honest with himself, he was probably just as hard as Vincent was even though he hadn't done anything to himself yet... He had just been waiting for this moment for what felt like forever and now it was _actually_ happening... And it was far sweeter than he could have imagined.

"You are somethin' else." Arthur huffed softly against Vincent's lips, feeling heat beginning to plague his body as he finally gave himself some relief.

"You seem pleased..." Vincent mused, his face still crimson from their activities.

"You have _no_ idea." Arthur chortled in response before leaning in quickly and connecting their lips together as Vincent's arms brought him closer.

It wasn't longer than a few seconds into the kiss that an idea popped into Arthur's head, and it was perfect. He grinned into the gesture before pulling back and soon releasing his member, focusing solely on Vincent. His grip firmed up a bit and his pace quickened, watching Vincent squirm slightly with the change in style. He released a shuddered breath and bit his lip roughly.

"W-What are you-..?" Vincent scrambled, his tone was strained in a way Arthur had never heard before and he wanted more.

"There you go..." He purred, not even bothering to answer Vincent's question as he heard the other's breathing quicken as well.

"A-Arthur I-I'm gonna cum..!" Vincent warned off the tail end of a sigh.

"Good. I wanna watch you." Arthur whispered, finally perching himself upwards again so he had a view over Vincent's body.

Arthur's eyes honed in on Vincent's expression as well as the way his chest rose and fell. For the first time in their entire relationship, Vincent felt shy as he saw Arthur's experienced and fierce eyes look upon him but he couldn't dwell on it for long. With so much attention on him, Vincent knew he would crumble any second.

"I'm so close..." He mewled, his torse shifting against the bed as he felt himself teetering on the edge of release.

Arthur's hand kept up its pace gliding up and down Vincent's manhood as it glistened with the telltale sign of an impending orgasm. It wasn't longer than perhaps thirty seconds later when he felt Vincent's body contorting against him and his back arching against the bed.

"F-Fuck! I'm cumming!" He yowled to Arthur's pleasure, who quickly reacted in time with Vincent's writhing.

Reaching up, Arthur's hand cupped over the head of Vincent's eruption, effectively catching the other's release in his palm, but his eyes kept his sights set on Vincent's expression. He was so beautiful when he came undone he almost looked angelic even as he panted heavily and barely managed to catch his breath from Arthur's treatment.

Acting quickly, Arthur coated his erection with Vincent's cum, which provided _excellent_ lubrication. There was just enough to slather it over Arthur's length as well as smearing just a touch over Vincent's entrance who flinched in surprise at the contact. Glancing down and noting what Arthur was doing, Vincent gulped and averted his gaze bashfully.

"You did that on purpose." He snorted.

"I sure did." Arthur replied as the fingers that applied the lubricant began pressing forward.

Knowing to be gentle and to take his time, Arthur started with one, slowly pushing inward until he felt Vincent's muscles relax and finally allowing his digit inside. Vincent gasped softly, still reeling from his orgasm as he felt Arthur prepping him for more. He couldn't help releasing a whine as he felt the foreign object slide further inside.

"How's it feel..?" Arthur asked, studying the other for any signs of discomfort.

"Good... It's good, Arthur." Vincent breathed, and hearing his confirmation Arthur added a second finger to the mix.

This time, Vincent seemed to wince only slightly but he adjusted well. He took a slow breath and relaxed, it just... Came so easy with him, it was like they already knew what to do with one another. There were no questions, no stress... Just them. Arthur's fingers moved carefully, massaging Vincent and venturing deeper only when he was absolutely certain that the other was comfortable.

"H-How long do you plan to tease me this time..?" Vincent stammered as he felt the heat beginning to rise in his core again.

"I'm only makin' sure you enjoy every moment of this." Arthur chortled richly, but eventually slipped his fingers back out. "But if you want..."

"Trust me... I want it." Vincent replied with a flirtatious wink, only making Arthur chuckle once again.

Finally lining himself up with Vincent's entrance, for a moment Arthur felt like he couldn't breathe... He had been waiting for this moment for what felt like eons and now it was here within his grasp. Taking ahold of his throbbing cock, Arthur readied himself up against Vincent's opening and taking care to rub the head against the needy young man beneath him. However, his eyes were gentle when they landed back on Vincent's briefly stunning the other with their transparency.

"... You ready?" He questioned.

For a brief second, Vincent felt like he had lost the ability to speak with just how flustered and pleasantly shocked he was with the events of this afternoon. Arthur was... Different this time. However, his trademark sweet smile spread over his lips before he nodded.

"Yeah... I always have been." He replied, momentarily wounding Arthur's heart with just how sincere his eyes and expression were.

Smiling back, Arthur's free hand reached down to support his weight as he leaned back down after lining himself up. Vincent's arms resumed their rightful place around Arthur's neck and just reminded himself to breathe. Before he knew it, Arthur's hips moved forward and connected them together. Vincent inhaled sharply and cringed at first, releasing a soft grunt of pain and shifting uncomfortably against the sheets while Arthur felt a brief overwhelming sense of pleasure.

Gritting his teeth, Arthur huffed out a breath as he felt Vincent's nails slightly carving into his back. It felt so fucking good, a wall of pleasure overcame him with the wave of pain that followed quickly after. However, his eyes opened and he was quick to check on Vincent who's clawing had slowly started to let up as he breathed through the pain and relaxed his body.

"How you doin'?" Arthur asked, his fingers coming up to brush against Vincent's cheek.

"I-I'm okay..." Vincent replied, leaning into Arthur's touch. "Please Arthur, don't feel like you gotta tip-toe." He then giggled.

"If I wasn't, you'd know it." Arthur chuckled as he pushed himself in deeper with the help of Vincent's own personal lubrication he provided.

"You did say your pleasures are decidedly rough... Why don't you show me what you meant?" Vincent challenged with a wicked grin.

"Goddammit, Vincent." Arthur growled but leaned in and quickly kissing Vincent roughly, effectively silencing him.

Only when he felt his hips pressing against Vincent's did he finally pull away and catch his breath with relative ease. Vincent on the other hand looked rather disheveled feeling Arthur entirely inside him for the first time.

"You're big..." Vincent mused.

"I try." Arthur snorted with a grin.

Finally beginning to pull out, Arthur took a breath as he watched relief flood Vincent's expression momentarily but it was soon replaced with longing. It felt so good... So right... Like they fit like perfect puzzle pieces. The last time Arthur had felt so whole, he was betrayed worse than ever before, but he forced those unpleasantries from his mind and focused on the task at hand which was making Vincent scream his name.

Blinking, Arthur looked upon Vincent's body with a lust he thought had long since left him. The way his body laid against the white sheets, framing his ruby stained face. His golden strands laying effortlessly, perfectly... Arthur forgot what it was like to want someone so desperately and be wanted in return.

He couldn't take it anymore, Arthur breathed in deeply before his hips began moving against Vincent's, he was sure to be gentle and work his way up to speed, but he needed more. The speed was slow, almost agonizing, but it was worth watching the pain melt off of Vincent's expression only to be replaced with pleasure. His silver hues, which were normally sharp with wisdom beyond his age, fluttered shut as the intensity of the pleasure between them started to build. Noting Vincent leaning his head to the side, Arthur took the opportunity to lean down and nip at Vincent's neck, running his tongue along his salty skin and enjoying every taste of it.

"God, Arthur..." Vincent moaned, feeling his lips tingle with anticipation.

"What was that..?" Arthur crooned against the other's flesh.

"I-I was just... Applauding your work..." Vincent quipped even in his flustered state.

"Oh..? We're just getting started."

Gauging Vincent's reactions against him, he was pretty certain that the other could handle more, and dammit Arthur was ready to give it. Thrusting in quickly and feeling his hips slap against the other's, Arthur grunted softly while Vincent gasped and whined. Taking a moment to sample Vincent's lips for a few moments as they remained connected to one another, Arthur gathered his senses and prepared himself to give in to his more primal urges.

"I wish you could see yourself." Arthur groaned, feeling the air stinging his back in the most delightful fashion.

"I think my view is just fine..." Vincent flirted, always taking Arthur off his feet one way or another.

Allowing some of his restrictions to fall, Arthur actually blushed as his hips began to move again, only this time they had a purpose. He started out careful, but as he felt himself gliding in and out of Vincent with ease, he finally convinced himself to let go. He was hearing nothing but positive feedback the harsher he was... If Vincent wanted to get a taste of him, Arthur would oblige.

Taking ahold of one of his hips, Arthur held him in place as the slaps turned into slams. He was sure getting more reactions from Vincent whose body rocked in time with him, panting and feeling the pleasure embrace him. He was just so beautiful, just watching him react so genuinely nearly threatened to force Arthur over the edge, but in holding himself back he knew he was getting close.

"I'm almost there." Arthur panted.

"A-Ah! Arthur, it feels so good!" Vincent exclaimed, moaning in time with his thrusts and giving in completely.

"Christ, Vincent." Arthur groaned, his reaction tempting Arthur further into what felt like a pleasure-filled madness.

Sweat formed at Arthur's brow as well as his back, desperately trying to hold on for as long as he could, enjoying this moment with Vincent. However, he suddenly felt Vincent's legs wrap around his waist and hold onto him tightly, his eyes shifting to meet Vincent's who's drunken haze almost seemed to look through him. Arthur grinned at the state of the man beneath him and continued his rough pounding.

Feeling Vincent's fingers tug at his hair, Arthur hissed in delight, his tongue diving between Vincent's lips and tasting him greedily. Feeling a budding sensation deep within him, Vincent slightly arched his back against Arthur and pulled away as he desperately caught his breath.

"I-Inside me... Do it inside me..." Vincent begged breathlessly.

Arthur audibly groaned at Vincent's needy little request, but he would definitely surrender and give him whatever he desired. Pressing his forehead against Vincent's and meeting his eyes for most-likely the last time before this liaison was complete, Arthur smirked and placed one last kiss on his lips.

"Let's do it together." Arthur urged before leaning back down to focus on Vincent's neck, wanting the world to know that he _belonged_ to someone.

Sinking his teeth roughly into Vincent's neck, almost hard enough to draw blood, he felt the other spasm against him and his walls cling onto his cock desperate for his seed. Vincent released a cry into the air, slurring Arthur's name unceremoniously that echoed through the empty house. At the feeling of Vincent's second orgasm happening against him, it nearly ripped Arthur's away from him. Quickly forcing his hips back into Vincent's one final time, Arthur groaned loudly as he unloaded deep inside of him, the pleasure feeling almost suffocating in the best kind of way.

After the initial waves of bliss subsided, Arthur panted heavily, barely managing to keep the majority of his weight off of Vincent who also heaved out breaths in an attempt to catch them once again. Though, as Arthur leaned down and lazily rested his forehead against Vincent's, he watched as the other's argent orbs looked up at him, exhaustion clearly written in them.

"That was..." Arthur murmured, trying to figure another word for _perfect._

"... Exactly what we needed." Vincent replied, finishing Arthur's sentence for him with a grin.

Arthur puffed out a breath of amusement, too tired to chuckle but he leaned in and planted a slow, long kiss on Vincent's lips, their tongues slowly beginning to dance with one another with ease. When Arthur eventually pulled back, he sighed before pushing himself a bit upward so he could pull out of Vincent easily. Arthur then flopped over onto his side with a small grunt and leaned his head back comfortably against the pillow behind him.

Vincent didn't hesitate in turning over onto his side and scooting closer, smiling happily when Arthur wrapped an arm around him and pulled him close. Feeling Vincent lean his head against his chest, Arthur couldn't help with playing with the scattered kinks in his hair, taking just the smallest enjoyment in the way they wrapped around his fingers and clung to them.

"Really... This was amazing." Arthur then said, wanting to make sure that Vincent knew he felt the same way as him.

"Yeah, you were." Vincent chuckled as his eyes shut tiredly.

Looking down to Vincent as he lulled into a light snooze, Arthur smiled as his hand continued to play with the blonde strands that rested against him. He wasn't expecting to have sex with Vincent after the eventful night prior but... He didn't regret it.

"So, what did you want me to know..?" Vincent asked against him, eyes still closed in contentment but Arthur grinned.

"... I forgot."

> I can't believe this moment's come  
>  It's so incredible that we're alone  
>  There's so much to be said and done  
>  It's impossible not to be overcome
> 
> Will you forgive me if I feel this way  
>  'Cause we've just met, tell me that's OK  
>  So take this feeling, make it grow  
>  Never let it, never let it go
> 
> (Don't let go of the things you believe in)  
>  You give me something that I can believe in  
>  (No, don't let go of this moment in time)  
>  Go of this moment in time  
>  (Don't let go of things that you're feeling)  
>  I can't explain the things that I'm feeling  
>  (No, don't let go)  
>  No, I won't let go
> 
> Now would you mind if I bared my soul  
>  (I bared my soul to you)  
>  If I came right out and said you're beautiful  
>  'Cause there's something here I can't explain  
>  I feel I'm diving into driving rain
> 
> You get my senses running wild  
>  I can't resist your sweet, sweet smile  
>  So take this feeling make it grow  
>  Never let it, never let it go
> 
> (Don't let go of the things you believe in)  
>  You give me something that I can believe in  
>  (No, don't let go of this moment in time)  
>  Go of this moment in time  
>  (Don't let go of things that you're feeling)  
>  I can't explain the things that I'm feeling  
>  (No, don't let go)  
>  No, I won't let go
> 
> I've been waiting all my life  
>  (All my life)  
>  To make this moment feel so right  
>  (Feel so right)  
>  The feel of you just fills the night  
>  So c'mon - let's just hold on tight
> 
> (Don't let go of the things you believe in)  
>  You give me something that I can believe in  
>  (No, don't let go of this moment in time)  
>  Go of this moment in time  
>  (Don't let go of things that you're feeling)  
>  I can't explain the things that I'm feeling  
>  (No, don't let go)  
>  No, I won't let go
> 
> (Don't let go)  
>  No, I won't let go  
>  (No, don't let go)  
>  No, I won't let go
> 
> source: [Don't Let Go by Bryan Adams & Sarah McLachlan](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rnsIZPL8oPE&ab_channel=MegaPurplebunny)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I really hope this chapter was worth the wait and let me just apologize real quick for the future! I'm finally starting up in school again which has led to a lot of stress and has put a dampener on my muse for writing. I have no intention on quitting obviously but if I disappear for a week or two don't panic! I'm just trying to figure everything out lmao. As always thank you to everyone whose keeping up with this series! It means the world to me. <3  
> -Eros


	20. Ocean Eyes

When John awoke the next morning, he was first met with the canvas ceiling of his tent. Carob eyes blinked groggily as they processed what happened the night before and while John didn't want to admit it, he had a pleasant time with Uncle... It was the most fun he had in months, and he was able to go to bed at least buzzed, it managed to soften the voices in his head. Abigail had spoken to him... And despite her eyes wielding unimaginable pain behind them they remained strong and threatened to strike him down if he stepped out of line.

Breathing out slowly, John reached up and rubbed his eyes before pushing himself up, grunting audibly, he was still extremely sore from the beatings he had received. He reached up and rubbed his jaw gently while the other reached around to cradle his leg wound. It felt considerably better since Susan had dug the bullet out of him, he was lucky that he hadn't gotten a fever. He would definitely have to thank her again even if she'd bite his head off.

It required some major will power, but when John was finally able to get up and dressed, he managed to limp out of his tent. He squinted as he was met by harsh light and quickly remembered why he parked underneath a tree before his eyes finally adjusted. He had almost relaxed until he noticed a couple of figures across the river, and upon a second glance noticed it was Hosea, who was knelt next to the water washing his face, and Javier who was armed and most likely assigned to be the one watching him. John froze, after his last conversation with Hosea ending on an uncomfortable note, he didn't know what to do.

When Hosea grabbed the towel that he had draped around his neck and dried his face, he opened his eyes just in time to see John gawking at him in shock. For a moment, his movements paused as well, but any surprise that was on Hosea's face disappeared and a look of something that resembled slight contempt settled in its place, making John's core shutter. Never in his life would he have guessed that Hosea would look at him like that... With distrust, disappointment, and shame.

However, as soon as the moment came, it went, and Hosea stood up and began his walk back to camp in haste. John sighed and averted his gaze, looking back to his firepit that he shared with Uncle and began to wonder if he should light it, desperate to forget what had just transpired.

Javier on the other hand watched the interaction closely, and he could feel the tension skyrocket when Hosea looked at John. Hosea sent just the smallest of glances to him on his way back to camp, and his eyes read uncertainty and betrayal. Only when the older man was gone did Javier settle his amber gaze back onto the injured dog. If it were him, hell, he would have preferred a bullet to the head rather than suffer this dishonorable fate, however remembering Dutch's words from before, Javier took a breath.

_ John is back... And with him, came some vital information valuable to our safety. I don't know everyone's personal feelings on the matter, but right now, John should be seen as an ally. _

Javier respected Dutch more than anyone...

What could John have told Dutch to welcome him back so easily? True, he was on probation currently but if this situation proved certain than John would be let off scot-free? Frowning, Javier leaned against a tree and began to wonder what the other man could have possibly gotten his hands on. He never disliked John before he ditched them, in fact, he and John got along far better than he and Bill despite working so closely with the bearded man often. Finally biting his tongue as he watched John lower himself back down to fiddle with the fire, Javier began the trek across the river, taking his time and slinging his gun over his shoulder as he did so.

Hearing the water sloshing from Javier's legs cutting through the flow, John turned his attention over and tensed slightly. While Javier hadn't taken any sucker punches at him, he had been pretty vocal about his disapproval for John's return. Though his eyes were intense, they softened a little when he approached.

"... I was told to come get you when you were up." He mentioned, and while his tone wasn't exactly welcoming, it wasn't hostile making John relax a little bit.

"Oh... Th-Thanks then." John muttered in reply as he stopped what he was doing, but when he went to stand back up he hissed and was momentarily stopped by his leg.

Recalling that John had been shot, Javier's brows arched for a moment and even though he wasn't exactly John's biggest fan at the moment he sighed and reached out, offering a hand to the other. John actually looked at it in shock and then up to Javier completely baffled. Was this a trap..? There was really only one way to find out, hesitantly reaching up, John took the offer and pushed himself up with his good leg while Javier hauled him up to his feet and made sure he was stable before releasing him.

"... Thanks, you didn't have to." He said, his tone still layered with surprise.

"Yeah well... A brother is a brother." Javier replied, and even though he was obviously still strained with his own conflicting feelings, he nodded sincerely to John who thanked his lucky stars to possibly have another ally.

John kept his mouth shut so he didn't ruin his chances with Javier but he nodded back with a nervously optimistic expression. He kept up with Javier as best he could who slowed his pace a bit when he noticed John struggling, and for a few minutes there was silence, but questions kept plaguing the olive-toned man and he was unable to help himself.

"So... Dutch said you might have some big news, you gonna fill us in?" He inquired, trying not to sound too nosey.

"I-I think I'll let him do that... It's kinda complicated, I don't wanna get anyone worked up yet." John responded uneasily, knowing if he breathed a word of this before Dutch and Hosea got a chance to speak to Trelawny they'd have his hide.

So much for that, Javier sighed but didn't probe John further, knowing that in time Dutch would tell them if it really was important. Though as they walked, John was thinking as well. What if in the end, Josiah betrayed him..?

No... He wouldn't do that, especially with a threat this large, John's mind just couldn't help but race at the thought of his demise. Josiah warned him time and time again not to get too close, not to get sloppy because if there was  _ one  _ thing the Van der Linde Gang was not, it was  _ sloppy  _ and Arthur proved that. Just the thought of seeing Arthur made John's skin crawl for more reasons than one.

However, when the two finally walked back into camp, the first thing John did was look around for the hostile man but wasn't surprised that he was still gone after leaving so dramatically the night before but if John was being honest with himself, he understood Arthur's feelings. Once upon a time, he held those feelings of betrayal and regret in his heart when he left, after seeing Arthur with Dutch... John quickly blinked away the image that had burned itself into his mind as he walked into camp, that was all ancient history now anyway, any chance he had of receiving closure from that disappeared when  _ he  _ did.

"John."

Dutch's authoritative tone almost made John jump as he quickly glanced up to see that Dutch was waving him over to his tent. Taking a breath and remembering that he was technically on neutral ground here and had nothing to fear, he approached Dutch willingly and as relaxed as he could. He used to wonder how Arthur could have gotten himself mixed up with a man who John once considered a father but... He could see it now, the way Dutch's eyes made John feel like something bigger than himself with the confidence and poise that he held in his own black pools... If there was one thing Arthur lacked, it was faith in himself.

Blinking, realizing that he had just made a crucial discovery, John shook his head and realized that Dutch had just spoken to him but he didn't hear a word of it.

"I-I'm sorry can you repeat that?" He asked.

"Somethin' wrong, John?" Dutch asked, arching a curious brow despite knowing the answer already.

"No, no I'm alright... Long night." John responded, reaching up and rubbing his eyes tiredly as Dutch chortled at his expense, but soon after he felt the other man's firm hand resting on his back as it used to... And John forgot how much he missed that sense of security.

"You'll heal up, but right now I need you to head into town with Hosea to meet up with Trelawny." Dutch explained.

"Oh, o'course, but aren't you gonna come with?" John inquired.

"Well, if theses  _ government agents _ are lookin' for me, I should probably stay outta sight at least for now..." Dutch replied watching Hosea slip out of the tent, somewhat surprising John who stood there looking like a startled animal; he quickly cleared his throat and nodded, watching Dutch's head turn over to Hosea wanting to make sure the other was willing to cooperate.

"Let's get on with this then." Hosea stated shortly, and John nodded, but suddenly hearing a baby crying from afar he paused.

"A-Actually... I know I don't have any right askin' favors from you, but do you mind waiting just a minute..? I got some things I gotta say to some folk." John said, hoping he didn't offend either Dutch or Hosea, but to his surprise, they both shared a look of understanding before glancing back to him and nodding their permission.

Taking a breath of relief, John offered just the smallest of smiles to them before turning away and limping off to track down the source of the cries. His palms began to sweat the closer and closer he got and rounding a corner, John stopped in his tracks when he saw Susan and Abigail together while Susan rocked the baby in her arms chuckling at his fussiness, but as soon as Abigail set her sights on John her smile disappeared and she was quick to take the baby from Susan as if to protect him from John, which hurt his heart beyond belief.

"Uh..." John mumbled, but Susan's piercing orbs rendered him speechless for a moment.

"... Abigail honey, why don't you get the laundry ready..? I'll meet you at the river." Susan finally said, giving Abigail an excuse to leave.

"Sure." Abigail replied shortly, turning away without a second thought and quickly retreating away from John... But in her hurry, John watched as the baby turned his face toward him and flashed the most innocent grin at him he had ever seen and his knees nearly felt weak with regret, but as Susan began stalking toward him he held his breath once she stopped in front of him with her hands positioned at her hips.

John felt like he was twelve years old again about to get the switch from the dreaded dragon of the camp, but she stood there watching him like a hawk. He even gulped as she stared him down but originally remembering why he wanted to see Susan in the first place he swallowed his fear and spoke up.

"... Thank you, Miss Grimshaw... F-For helping my leg... A-And I'm sorry that I-I mean-" Without warning, Susan suddenly yanked John toward her and embraced him tightly.

"About time." She sighed softly and hugged him tighter than he ever, John's mouth hung open as Susan embraced him but to his own surprise he gave into it quickly, hugging her back and burying his face into her shoulder.

He hadn't felt genuine warmth and affection in so long, Uncle had definitely helped his tension but for Susan to hug him... John thought he might cry, his arms began to tremble as he felt her palm gently cradle the back of his head.

"You stupid,  _ stupid _ boy." She scoffed, though for a moment John thought he heard her own voice waver.

Thankfully, she pulled back just in time for John to gather himself again, but her hands rested on his shoulders. Her look was critical but she no longer looked like she despised him, which was all he was hoping to get out of this anyway.

"... It's not gonna be easy, my boy." She sighed, reaching up and gently caressing John's face for a moment before her hands dropped.

"I-I know... Miss Grimshaw I promise I'm  _ so _ sorry, I-I don't know what I was thinkin' and-"

"John." Susan interjected, watching John gulp harshly and avert his gaze shamefully. "... If you really came back to save us, that's all that matters." She then said, nodding seriously.

"... Do you think  _ she'll _ think the same way?" John asked hesitantly, looking in the direction in which Abigail went.

Susan opened her mouth to speak but soon closed it as she looked in the direction as well, she took a breath not knowing how to react at first. What was she supposed to say? Technically Arthur and Abigail were involved but that wasn't her business to tell, as well as the fact that John had already hurt Abigail once... She averted her eyes before shaking his head.

"I can't help you there... Whatever plans you have, leave me out of it, and I swear John Marston if you pull this shit again and hurt that girl or her little boy, there ain't nowhere you can run... Understand that?" She asked seriously, her look taking a hardness that almost scared John.

Now it was his turn to think of his answer carefully, he swallowed and thought hard. What did he even want with Abigail? Did he want to pursue her again? In truth, John didn't even know, he just wanted her to know how fucking sorry he was... His leaving was never about her, or even Arthur... It was about himself. Coming to that conclusion he looked back up and met Susan's gaze before nodding.

"I understand." He said, watching a look of relief wash over Susan's face for a moment.

"Good... If you want to say something to her I suppose I can be fashionably late goin' down to the river... But I'm watching you." She said, arching a brow at John as he offered a weak smile to her.

Abigail sat quietly as she scrubbed laundry on the washboard in the flowing river, often looking over to her infant who was busy putting his feet in his mouth and cooing contentedly. She was still shaken up over coming face-to-face with John. She was so conflicted and didn't know what to do or say... What was there to say? She thought John wanted to go on this journey with her, so for him to ditch them like that... How was she even supposed to face him without thinking about that in the back of her mind?

Her hands slowly stopped what they were doing and eventually, Abigail just sighed and reached up, gently wiping the sweat from her brow with the back of her forearm. She was certain that Susan was flaying John alive, and deservedly so... But she couldn't help the painful pang in her heart at the sight of him.

John had taught her how to read... And it was true, she wasn't literate yet, but she at least knew her letters and could decypher syllables... How was she supposed to forget that too?

Arthur had been so distant with her as of late, and he always assured her that it wasn't her fault, but what was she supposed to think when Arthur was never here anymore? Gently wiping her dripping hands on her dress she turned toward Jack who beamed a smile at her when she did so, and his joy couldn't help bleeding over to her. A smile melted over Abigail's expression as she giggled and leaned down, pulling up Jack's shirt and planting a raspberry on his stomach, hearing him screech and squawk with laughter.

Pulling back Abigail laughed and playfully pinched Jack's cheeks, however recalling the cougar that had almost got the drop on her, Abigail's head swiveled around and quickly taking a look around her surroundings. She calmed quickly until she looked behind her and jumped slightly as she saw John approaching... Alone.

John stopped in his tracks and stared at her as well, he hoped she wouldn't be angry at Susan for allowing John this time with her. Though, Abigail was quick once again to scoop the baby up in her arms and turn away from him as she held Jack close to her, not allowing John to look at either of them, afraid she would break if she did for too long. John sighed, knowing he deserved that but it didn't make it any less painful, but he continued walking until he was standing beside her.

Both of them for silent for what felt like eons, and John didn't dare try to get a peek at the infant. He felt like a coward... He was supposed to be the one talking... To say something, anything!

"... How is your leg?"

Blinking, John looked over, and while Abigail still wasn't looking at him and her tone was strained... She was trying, and it meant the world to John since she had no obligation to at all.

"... Hurt's like a-" John paused, remembering there was a baby in Abigail's arms, he puffed out a small breath of amusement but shook his head. "It's sore." he reiterated.

"Good." Abigail scoffed softly, running her fingers through Jack's hair.

"I earned that..." John muttered.

"Yes, you did." Abigail replied, looking over at John willingly, her eyes were fierce, dangerous. "Why are you here, John?" She asked.

"... To be honest, I don't really know." John sighed as he shoved his hands in his pockets and looked out to the river. "I... I had this plan that I would come down and tell you how sorry I was, that it was never your fault... But that doesn't seem right, nor is it fair to say." He sighed, reaching up and rubbing his eyes.

"You're right." Abigail muttered, her tone softening just slightly, at least willing to hear him.

"... But, even if you don't want me to say it, even if I don't deserve to say it... You deserve to hear it... I'm sorry, Abigail." He said, finally looking over at her and watching as she looked back with an expression of apparent shock.

The moment was brief, Abigail was quick to look away again but the genuine surprise and vulnerability in her face was something he missed dearly.

"I-I... I don't know what you want me to say, John." She muttered.

"Don't say anything, if you don't want to... I didn't apologize to you cause I wanted to get something out of it... I did it because it was the right thing to do whether you accept it or not..." He explained, his dark eyes returning to the flow of the water.

Abigail looked back to John and looking over his features as he gazed outward... He really seemed different, more mature maybe. Though Abigail would never express approval for him abandoning her and the gang, perhaps John  _ was _ being honest and... Perhaps it was better for  _ him  _ in the long run, but what about her? Her child?

"Anyway... That's all I wanted to say... I didn't come here to torture you, I know you weren't expecting me." John sighed before he turned around and began his trek toward camp.

"John!" Abigail barked, quickly turning and stopping John again, she quieted when he looked back at her but knowing she called him for a reason she took a breath. "... Did you... Wanna see him?" She murmured, referring to Jack as she gently allowed him to rest against her lap, John gulped but he would be lying if he said he wasn't curious.

Turning around and returning to Abigail's side and finally getting his first good view of the infant who babbled and smiled happily. John's heart pumped erratically and he knelt down beside her as she carefully tilted Jack toward John for a better view, watching as the baby looked up at John with a smile as always. Jack was never a shy baby... And Abigail couldn't help smiling as Jack reached out for John.

"He likes you..." She mused softly before glancing over to John.

John sat there rigid for a moment as he was slapped in the face by what he had missed while he was gone... And words couldn't express how much he regretted leaving, but that didn't take the fear away from this child actually being his own... And those blue eyes...

"... He's somethin' alright." He mused, reaching in and allowing Jack to grasp his fingers.

He couldn't resist smiling for long, babies always had that effect on people after all. He bubbled saliva and played around with John's hand as he felt the callouses from his hard work as a loner. However, when John's eyes looked over and met Abigail's his heart skipped a beat and both of them were quick to look away once more.

"... Thank you for this." John said seriously.

"Don't expect anything else." Abigail mentioned almost playfully as she looked back down to Jack but a question had been weighing on her since John had returned. "... John, why did you come back?" She asked, looking back over to him.

There was a long and slightly complicated answer behind that and John knew he couldn't tell Abigail the answer yet without confirming it with Dutch, Hosea and Trelawny... But Abigail deserved an answer nonetheless.

"... Because even if I made the biggest mistake of my life leaving, not coming back just wasn't an option. I'll do anything to protect this family, as dysfunctional as it is." John replied with a warmth in his voice that Abigail wasn't expecting. "... That includes you two." He then said as he met Abigail's eyes and watching just the slightest shade of pink tint Abigail's cheeks.

She was quick to look away as always but John kept his eyes on her, getting a taste of how beautiful she was, not even motherhood could change that. Though John knew Susan would be here soon and he didn't want to keep Hosea waiting... Taking one last look at Jack he smiled and gently poked his nose and watching as Jack's blue eyes crossed slightly to look at his finger, earning a small chuckle from both John and Abigail.

"... Really, thank you." John said softly, his shoulder gently brushing against hers as he stood up. "I won't take up any more of your precious time, lord knows what Miss Grimshaw would do to me if I did." He sighed hopefully to lighten the mood a little, watching Abigail smile a bit softer at him.

"You're right about that... But John?" She asked before he turned away again, watching him look down at her. "... If you really wanna get back in my good graces, maybe you'll read to me sometime..?"

John arched his brows in pure disbelief, Abigail was... Offering to spend time with him, despite what he had done? Trying to suppress the blush he knew was coming, he cleared his throat but he nodded without a doubt.

"O'course..." He replied.

When he was walking back toward camp, John tried not to get himself too excited, he reminded himself that he still wasn't even sure what he wanted where Abigail was concerned... But it was nice that she was letting him in, even if little by little. It was far more than what he deserved.

John felt lighter than he had in months, but the tension returned when he saw Hosea waiting for him with crossed arms when he finally got back. He tried not to take too much time, but he could only walk so fast with the wound in his leg. He hurried as fast as he could and huffed out a few breaths when he finally got close enough.

"Sorry..." He sighed.

"Let's not waste any more time, then." Hosea stated before brushing past John without a second glance, leaving John behind to revel in that pain.

Slowly inhaling, John turned around and silently followed after Hosea, preparing himself for the awkward ride ahead of them. Talking to Abigail was one thing but Hosea... He didn't even know where to start, he was so ashamed to be in his presence after what he had done he would have rather shriveled up and died than face him but he didn't hesitate to mount up.

John tried to keep his eyes forward, but they always found themselves gravitating toward Hosea who rode in front of him in the lead. He wanted so desperately to tell him how sorry he was like he did with Abigail, how was it so easy with her..?

"You gonna say something?" Hosea suddenly asked, nearly making John fall off his horse with his apparent mind-reading abilities.

"U-Uh I... I just felt like nothing I could say would..." He mumbled.

"Grow up, John, you were grown enough to leave." Hosea scoffed with distaste.

"I-I know that! I wasn't tryin' to act like I was better than that I just... I don't know... I never wanted to disappoint you, Hosea... I'm sorry." He sighed.

For once, Hosea thought and after a few moments of silence, pulled back on his reins so that he could ride more side-by-side with John, looking over at him with a stern expression.

"I know." He said.

"A-And I know that no excuse I give could make up for it."

"I know."

"C-Could you say something other than that?" John asked, sounding desperate as Hosea exhaled and shook his head.

"I don't know what you want me to say John..." Hosea replied.

"I-I don't know either... I'm just really,  _ really  _ sorry, Hosea." John stated, meeting Hosea's eyes confidently, momentarily surprising the older man whose look softened.

"... I know, John... Believe it or not, I was relieved when Arthur dragged you back into camp." He mentioned, watching John's eyes widen.

"R-Really?" He questioned.

"Of course!" Hosea barked, sending another scalding hot glare John's way and watching the ebony-haired man wince in response, he quickly calmed and looked away as he took a breath. "... I can't tell you how many times that I looked into the mountains or the plains... Wonderin' where you ended up, if you were even alive... Trust me, John, I was relieved." he scoffed.

John stared at Hosea as they continued their ride, though a small smile made its way across his face... Perhaps things weren't too late with Hosea after all, though as they rode, John noticed that Hosea steered them toward Airdale, momentarily confusing him.

"Uh, Hosea, Trelawny is stayin' Copper Lake..." He reminded.

"I know... We're goin' to get Arthur." Hosea replied, nearly making John sick to his stomach.

"What!?" John gasped.

"You didn't think we weren't including Arthur in this, did you?" Hosea inquired curiously.

"N-No it's not that, i-it's just-"

"It's just  _ what,  _ John?"

"... Nothing." John eventually groaned, beginning to mentally prepare himself for the face-off.

> It's not fair  
> Yeah, I know  
> I just wish I could be there with you  
> Yeah, it's not fair  
> Yeah, I know  
> I just wish I could be there with you  
> But I can't
> 
>   
> I just wanna scream back at the world  
> I just wanna leave  
> But it make things worse  
> I just wanna hate you  
> But I can't  
> No, I can't, no, I can't  
> I've been going through this on my own  
> Did you even care when I was gone?  
> I just wanna hate you  
> But I can't  
> No, I can't, no, I can't
> 
>   
> 'Cause we got a lot of love  
> But it don't make sense  
> 'Cause we argue all the time  
> Baby, it's about time that we go  
> And start over  
> Yeah, we got a lot of love  
> But it don't make sense  
> It's a pain in my chest  
> I just wanna see you again  
> But maybe it's for the best
> 
>   
> It's not fair  
> Yeah, I know  
> I just wish I could be there with you  
> Yeah, it's not fair  
> Yeah, I know  
> I just wish I could be there with you  
> But I can't
> 
>   
> I just wanna scream back at the world  
> I just wanna leave  
> But it make things worse  
> I just wanna hate you  
> But I can't  
> No, I can't, no, I can't  
> I've been going through this on my own  
> Did you even care when I was gone?  
> I just wanna hate you  
> But I can't  
> No, I can't, no, I can't
> 
>   
> 'Cause we got a lot of love  
> But it don't make sense  
> 'Cause we argue all the time  
> Baby, it's about time that we go  
> And start over  
> Yeah, we got a lot of love  
> But it don't make sense  
> It's a pain in my chest  
> I just wanna see you again  
> But maybe it's for the best
> 
>   
> It's not fair  
> Yeah, I know  
> I just wish I could be there with you  
> But I can't
> 
> source: [I Can't Hate You by Kayou. (feat. Yaeow)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcjvxKmi7PI&ab_channel=AminiumMusic)


	21. New Beginnings

"A-Ah! Arthur!"

All that could be heard inside the privacy of the ranch house in the early morning was Vincent's voice echoing off the walls. Currently, Arthur was laid out on the bed, his arms relaxed and poised folded behind his head as he watched with greedy eyes as the gorgeous blonde haired ranch hand, who Arthur thought to be unobtainable, rode him with _much_ enthusiasm. They had been locked away since the afternoon prior, after all Vincent had gone through he deserved one night to cut loose and be free... And after the unpleasantness with John, Arthur _desperately_ needed the stress relief.

Leaning down, Vincent hastily pressed his lips against Arthur's, once again freeing him of the unbearable thought of John. Grunting into the gesture Arthur's hands slowly fell from behind his head and caressed up Vincent's thighs, his movements calm and collected until his fingers latched tightly onto the other's hips, his own beginning to meet Vincent's with force, causing him to gasp out.

"R-Right there!" Vincent cried out, pushing himself back up into the sitting position so that he could throw his head back, releasing such wanton noises that pursued Arthur in his slumber.

Cocking a small unseen smirk, Arthur continued working himself in and out of Vincent at a moderate pace, wanting to last as long as he could before they'd have to start chores for the day. He too leaned his head back into the pillow and allowed himself to get sucked into the pleasure for a moment, groaning and feeling sweat forming at his brow. Although, Arthur knew he couldn't keep his eyes off of Vincent for long the way his chest glistened just slightly in the peeking of the morning sunlight. He was a stunning young man and Arthur knew he was _much_ more than lucky to have him this way.

"Christ..." He hissed, a struggled grunt coming soon after as he felt Vincent's walls squeezing him in the most delightful of fashions.

As Arthur's eyes opened and locked on Vincent's frame, combing over his flesh with them, he soon surfed upward to meet the flustered and hazed over sterling silvers. They were so intoxicating, he couldn't take it anymore. Suddenly, Arthur briefly released Vincent's hips and with one of his freed hands abruptly pushed himself into the sitting position while the other swiftly wrapped itself around Vincent's waist to keep him from sliding down due to the quick motion.

When Arthur's hips stopped there was only the smallest sheen of confusion running over Vincent's features, but he inhaled sharply as Arthur sat up and as he began to fall back. He was gawking up at Arthur as he was caught but a blush was soon to follow. He didn't have any time to ask questions before Arthur leaned in, crashing their lips together making Vincent's eyes flutter shut once again as his arms found themselves wrapping around Arthur's neck.

Arthur's tongue slipped easily through Vincent's lips as their pace paused for the moment, pulling back only when he had to. Arthur huffed out a few breaths as Vincent wordlessly panted and stared ahead at Arthur with surprise at his intimate gestures. No longer being overwhelmed with pleasure, one of Vincent's hands gently slid back down until his fingers were able to come in contact with his cheek. Without being able to resist, Arthur leaned into the touch much like an obedient dog, and planted a kiss upon the other's palm.

He wasn't used to feeling so... Open and connected, the last time he allowed himself to get this close to someone it blew up in his face and he intentionally kept himself at arm's length for that reason alone but now...

The look in Arthur's eyes was so disarming, but before Vincent could ask if he was alright, he was suddenly dropped back against the bed with just the slightest of _thuds_ as he released a small gasp of surprise. Arthur carefully pulled his lower half out from under Vincent and knelt between his legs. However, as Vincent opened his eyes and looked up at Arthur, whatever words he had prepared died in his throat as he watched Arthur spread his them, his fingers firmly wrapping themselves around his ankles.

Arthur's hungry glare drank Vincent's form up as he prepared himself to finish this and leave Vincent a heaving mess. Throughout the exchange, Arthur had managed to keep himself inside the other, though right now he was so close to slipping out he was just perhaps an inch away but Arthur had no intention of letting that happen. Without warning, he thrust forward rapidly, watching Vincent's expression contort with lust while he arched his back against the bed at the sudden and delightful intrusion, releasing a sharp high-pitched whine.

"... Right there?" Arthur finally purred, his smirk gleaming smug satisfaction at watching Vincent crumble beneath him, his expression turning into nothing short of simpering.

"Y-Yes..." Vincent whimpered, giving Arthur one last chance to look over his body.

His neck was aligned with bruises of all shapes and sizes, though Arthur was careful to keep them from exposure as best he could, he didn't want to make it obvious they were fucking after all. Vincent was like Arthur's own personal canvas, marking him possessively even if no one would see them. His chest rose and fell with anticipation and his argent orbs fixated on Arthur as best they could, but he wasn't prepared for what Vincent said next.

"A-Arthur, please... Fuck me..." He pleaded.

There was something so gratifying having someone as handsome as Vincent begging Arthur to fuck him... It definitely let him know he was doing something right. Gritting his teeth only briefly, the smirk holding on his expression.

"... Ask and you shall receive." Arthur mused simply.

Keeping Vincent's legs spread by his ankles, Arthur began driving his hips forward at a rough and tameless pace, wanting to give Vincent whatever he wanted. Clutching at the sheets above his head, Vincent's mouth fell open and nothing but moans and cries escaped. Arthur winced as he felt Vincent's muscles beginning to hold onto him unbearably tight as he got closer and closer to his orgasm.

Arthur was quick in maneuvering Vincent's legs one last time until they were perfectly wrapped around his waist where they belonged so that he could lean over Vincent and get a better look at his beautiful crimson visage as he came undone. Planting sloppy wet kisses at Vincent's neck, he felt Vincent's arms throw themselves around him and his nails beginning to carve into his back roughly, the pain only heightening Arthur's pleasure.

Vincent didn't even have time to warn Arthur that his end was near, before he could even comprehend that it was around the corner his warmth spasmed against Arthur's cock as the overpowering pleasure forced him over the edge.

"O-Oh fuck Arthur! I'm cumming!" He mewled as the warm wetness of his orgasm coated both of their midsections.

Vincent's words were so needy that it, as well as the delightful stinging against his back, were just enough for Arthur to get lost in his own pleasure. Releasing a muffled cry into Vincent's neck, Arthur's hips bucked forward meeting Vincent's almost with painful force but nothing was able to distract Arthur as his seed gushed and poured into the other beneath him.

When all was said and done, Arthur nearly collapsed on top of Vincent but was able to _somewhat_ slowly lower himself on top of the other as he panted heavily in time with him. The grip on his back had all but ceased and Vincent's fingers soon found themselves delving into Arthur's thick brunette mane once again that messily cascaded downward. The soothing feeling was the only thing that kept Arthur from completely passing out on top of Vincent, which he would've never gotten over if he had.

Eventually, Arthur's head came up from it's resting place against Vincent's hot skin so he could peer down silently at the other whose eyes tiredly fluttered open in response.

"... This was a bad idea." He mentioned softly with a small amused smile as he saw Vincent struggling to stay conscious despite the pride in rendering him useless.

"You... You may be right about that... But I never back down from a challenge." Vincent replied smoothly, his tactful replies always keeping Arthur on his toes.

"That's 'cause you're a young man... I'm ancient." Arthur snorted as he slowly pushed himself up so that he could roll off of Vincent easily with a small groan.

"Oh please." Vincent snickered as he allowed his legs to fall back into a move comfortable position and turn himself onto his side toward the other, propping himself up on his elbow as he looked down at Arthur who relaxed easily. "Men who are ancient don't perform like _that_."

"You have experience with ancient men?" Arthur joked watching Vincent's face light up with a blush.

"I walked right into that one." He scoffed but smiled and shook his head. "How are you so good at _that_ anyway?" He inquired after pushing himself up into the sitting position carefully so that he could get off the bed.

"Well, when you're an uneducated teenager with no motivation or purpose... Your skills get _refined_ elsewhere." Arthur chuckled in reply as he craned his head over and watched Vincent stand up and admiring his body as usual as he heard him laugh.

It wasn't long after that Arthur sat up and scooted to the edge of the bed and before Vincent could disappear toward the washroom to clean himself up, Arthur caught his wrist carefully and pulled him closer. When Vincent was in the V of his legs, Arthur wrapped his arms loosely around his waist and looked upward at him.

"You're amazing." He groaned.

"I'm aware." Vincent snorted with a grin as he leisurely wrapped his own arms around Arthur's shoulders. "You're not half bad yourself." He mused before leaning in and pressing his lips firmly against Arthur's.

"Good to know." Arthur chuckled before reluctantly letting the other go and watching almost longingly as he left the room to get ready for the day.

Only when he was gone did Arthur sigh and flop back onto the bed for a few moments. What the hell was he doing? This was going way too far... Way too fast. Opening his eyes Arthur's heart quickened briefly as he thought about how horribly happy he had been with Vincent these past months... And he had been so _miserable_ at camp. He was so confused... And he didn't understand why.

Eventually, knowing that he'd have to get up no matter what, Arthur pushed himself back up with a small huff before he walked over to his bag and pulled out the last of his clean outfits, he'd have to go back no matter what but just the thought nearly had Arthur's stomach rolling. After taking great care to make sure he was cleaned of any _debris,_ he shoved his arms through the sleeves of his shirt Arthur tucked it carefully into his pants before fastening his belt and meandering back to the bed. Sitting back down, Arthur reached over for his boots just in time for Vincent to walk back in dressed and ready and see him sweep his hair back over his ear after it fell into his face.

"Here, hold on." Vincent mentioned briefly.

He walked over to his wardrobe and pulled open the drawers, surfing through it quickly until finding what he was looking for. When he approached Arthur he held out a dull-colored strand of ribbon and held it out for him.

"Tie it back."

Arching his brows, Arthur didn't realize his hair was _that_ long... He hadn't been able to tie his hair back in years, probably since his twenties. Although he couldn't deny that his hair was becoming more and more of a nuisance lately. Hesitantly, he reached out and took it.

"Thanks."

Gently placing it between his lips for a moment, Arthur gathered his hair swiftly and pulled it back behind him. Once he was satisfied, he reached back around with one hand to take the ribbon and tie it up as suggested. There may have been a few stray shorter hairs but it was already so much better, he didn't know why he didn't consider it sooner.

"Where's the barber in this town?" He then asked, making Vincent chuckle softly.

"What? No! I like it this way..." He argued playfully reaching back to gently toy with the ponytail.

"Trust me, you'll change your mind." Arthur snickered before he slipped his boots on and stood up, wrapping an arm affectionately around Vincent's neck and pulling him close before beginning to walk them toward the front door so they could head out.

"You think so?" Vincent inquired.

"I know so..." Arthur replied.

Releasing Vincent from his hold, Arthur reached out and opened the door for Vincent and winking at him as he walked outside. Vincent released a small shiver when they got out, the cold front was coming in and Arthur was glad that his last shirt was long-sleeved.

"You wanna get started without me? I'm gonna go ahead and make sure the coop is warm enough." Vincent stated.

"Sure, don't keep me waitin' too long." Arthur teased before walking out toward the barn.

* * *

Reaching into his pocket, Hosea took out his pocket watch and glanced to the time, it was about nine o'clock, Arthur should be up by now. Passing through Airdale with John in tow, Hosea hummed softly. He hadn't actually been to the ranch that Arthur was staying on yet and he was having difficulty finding it.

"You okay up there?" John asked as he noted Hosea slowing down.

"I just didn't think a massive ranch would be so hard to find." Hosea sighed as they came to a fork in the road.

"Uh... A-Actually I know where it is... If you want me to take the lead." John offered apprehensively, but watching Hosea glance over to him, he nodded expectantly giving John some much-needed relief as he exhaled and kicked Gypsy to pass Hosea.

Hosea arched a brow for a moment wondering how John knew where Arthur was held up, but he figured the less he knew about that the better. Thankfully, John didn't seem to be talking out of his ass because only after another ten or so minutes they started rolling up on a large homestead and Hosea was left pleasantly surprised. There didn't seem to be any guards at the gates which allowed Hosea and John to trot in nonchalantly. However, the hands seemed to be stretched far and in between, and given the size of the property, Hosea wasn't too shocked about that, but they could see The Admiral tied up on a post by the house, so Arthur was definitely here. Hosea climbed off his horse and tied him up before looking to John.

"I'm gonna go see if I can find someone in charge around here." He stated.

"What do you want me to do?" John asked.

"You can stay here if you want, I don't plan to be long." Hosea replied before looking around and beginning to walk around the back of the house and disappearing from John's sights.

Sighing softly, John dismounted Gypsy and walked her to The Admiral's other side and tied her down before he walked around to the stoic horse's front. At first, he seemed to snub John's presence but as he clicked his tongue and lured The Admiral closer it wasn't long before the aggressive stallion was leaning into John's touch affectionately, something he only did with Arthur himself. Unable to help it, a small smile washed over John's face, feeling nothing but lucky.

"Good boy..." He praised, scratching under his chin just the way he liked.

The process was a lot longer than Vincent had hoped with the coop considering when he arrived, he found that a coyote had managed to get in and slaughter almost three of them. Thankfully, this wouldn't hurt profit but it was still annoying, and Vincent had to spend almost two hours looking for where the coyote had broken into the fence.

"Just board it up, but we need to be more vigilant. Whoever is doin' night watch needs to actually _check_ the coop." Vincent stated seriously to one of his hands who had helped him track the animal.

"Yessir." He replied before retreating with haste to get the materials needed.

Vincent huffed softly as he reached up and ran a hand through his golden curls with slight frustration until movement caught the corner of his eye. Turning, he noted an unfamiliar horse as well as a person standing by his house... Frowning, Vincent reached down and rested his hand on his hip just making sure he was armed before he started his trek toward the trespasser. He had canceled the _shoot on sight_ order after Myles was brought into custody but that didn't make him any less suspicious, but as he got closer his tracks actually paused momentarily as he saw this dark-haired stranger petting none other than The Admiral... Without losing a hand, in fact, the horse almost seemed familiar with him.

"... Hey there." Vincent greeted evenly, causing the other man to jump and turn quickly. "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you." He chuckled.

"S-Sorry, I just didn't hear you comin'." The other replied, quickly taking his hands away from the horse who huffed and nudged him expectantly. "I hope I'm not botherin' you I'm just waitin' for my partner to find whoever's in charge." He explained.

Vincent took a moment to look over the man, long dark hair, dark eyes that seemed both assertive and submissive all at once and he also sported an eyebrow scar. It made the blonde young man hum softly as he reached up and rubbed his chin.

"Can I ask why?" He questioned.

"We're lookin' for an associate of mine, he's been workin' here for a while I guess." The unfamiliar man replied, fidgeting slightly having not been used to interacting with strangers since he left.

"Well, there's a lot of people who work here, you're gonna have to be more specific, we laid off most of the summer workers so I can't be sure." Vincent said calmly as he casually leaned against the house. "I also gotta ask whose looking for my hands too, I've had enough problems here as of late." He explained.

"Are you... You run this place?" The stranger asked with obvious shock.

"Well... It's somewhat new." Vincent murmured, clearing his throat quickly before looking at the other expectantly who nodded.

"Right, sorry... My name is John, I'm lookin' for Arthur?" John inquired almost relaxing until he watched a completely shocked expression wash over the other man's face.

"... You're John." Vincent said, almost sounding familiar with his name and immediately putting John on edge.

It was right about this time that Arthur strolled out of the barn, reaching up and wiping the sweat from his brow until he craned his head over and saw none other than John Fucking Marston talking with Vincent. John could see it a mile away the way his eyes ignited with that familiar blood boiling rage as he began storming over. Almost gasping, John withdrew into himself and actually took a step back away from Vincent who had no idea what was coming until a large hand swept around him from behind and somewhat pushed him away until he was standing behind Arthur as if to protect him.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Arthur snarled.

"I-I-I-..." John stammered completely caught off guard by Arthur's hostility, he knew to expect it but it didn't cut him down any less.

"Get the fuck outta here." Arthur growled.

"Afraid we can't do that, son." Hosea's voice finally came from behind him, making both Arthur and Vincent turn to see Hosea being led by another hand. "Nice to meet you." He mused simply to Vincent who arched his brows at him.

"Uh... Nice to meet you too." He muttered.

"I'm sorry, but what?" Arthur asked, far calmer than before at seeing Hosea, and truthfully he should have recognized Hosea's horse but he was already seeing red at John's presence.

"We need your help away from here, it's important, we can fill you in on the way." Hosea explained vaguely in front of Vincent to Arthur's relief who settled his simmering glare back on John who wouldn't look at him.

"... Fine." Arthur scoffed before turning to look at Vincent who looked just as confused as he expected. "Give us a minute?" He inquired to Hosea who nodded and watched as Arthur walked with Vincent back into the privacy of the barn.

Looking back to John he couldn't help but feel a small lurching in his heart as seeing him look almost utterly destroyed as he watched Arthur playfully sling his arm around Vincent's neck... The same way he used to do to him. However, John quickly looked away before he mounted back up on Gypsy and began riding her back toward the main gate, Hosea opened his mouth to call out to him, but seeing John stop alone... He sighed, he knew it wasn't his business to tell John that he knew about them but it didn't take away the ache in his heart that one of his boys was going through such misery.

Whether he left or not... John was still one of his boys.

With that, Hosea mounted up and kicked off toward the main gate, making sure that Arthur would still be able to see them from where they were at before approaching John who sat still, his eyes closed as the wind brushed through his hair like a calming comb.

"... You okay?" Hosea asked, breaking John out of his apparent meditation before he glanced over but he was quick to look away again.

"... Yeah." John replied softly. "... Who was that?" He then asked despite every bone in his body telling him not to.

"Honestly, I don't really know... Arthur's just been workin' around his ranch the last six or so months..." Hosea replied truthfully. "His name is... Victor... No, Vincent." He clarified, but kept his eyes focused carefully on John.

"Interesting." He eventually stated, opting to leave it at that, his expression unreadable.

Vincent couldn't help but glance behind them as Arthur led him away, watching John and the older gentlemen ride off and settling up near the gate. He hadn't seen Arthur get angry like that since Myles had grabbed a hold of his burnt arm in the bar. Sighing, he just kept walking and casually kicked away the door stopper that held the wooden door open, making the door slowly swing shut behind them.

"So... You gonna tell me what that was?" Vincent inquired curiously as Arthur sighed.

"Sorry about that... I never thought he'd show up here." He huffed, letting go of Vincent and walking over to the wall and leaning against it, looking up at the ceiling with obvious contempt written in his eyes.

"... You know I can protect myself, right?" Vincent then asked as he approached Arthur and leaned against the wall beside him, watching Arthur chuckle a little hollowly.

"Yeah I know... Trust me, after watching you put the Sheriff in his place, I have no worries about you." He replied as he looked back down to the vibrant young man that stood beside him and took a breath, he _never_ wanted his home drama to surface here and more importantly, he didn't want John tainting his time with Vincent. "Sorry... I just..." He mumbled.

"... You were hurt." Vincent finished the sentence for him with a small concerned frown, however, there was something that had been weighing on his mind and while this might have not been the most opportune time, he found himself speaking anyway. "You know..." He started but his voice was quick to die off until Arthur tilted his head somewhat at him.

"What is it?"

"I-I... Well..." Vincent stuttered, actually beginning to look a little flustered to Arthur's surprise. "I-I don't want you to think that I'm jumping the gun here but... I know you mentioned your time here was limited and..." He sighed, reaching up and rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as a blush rose to his cheeks. "And given recent... Circumstances... I-If you ever wanted to... Stay..."

**_BA-BUMP._ **

For a moment nothing but panic went through every vein in Arthur's body at the prospect of staying behind with Vincent... Because deep down... Part of him wanted to, and the guilt that surfaced because of that nearly threatened to push him off the brink of his delicate sanity, but Arthur took a breath as he realized that it had taken a lot for Vincent to offer that. Swallowing harshly, he slowly replayed Vincent's words in his head and managed to slowly calm himself of the inevitable panic attack, he had to keep it together after all.

"I-I... I don't know." Arthur mumbled.

"I'm not saying you have to give me an answer or anything... Just know my door is open, that's all." Vincent said, offering a smile up to Arthur and startling him with his sweetness as usual and his words definitely helped calm some of Arthur's anxieties and without warning, Arthur reached forward and yanked Vincent close to him by his shirt, embracing him tightly when he was stumbled into.

"... Thank you." He said softly, barely above a whisper as Vincent regained his footing and hugged Arthur close to him.

"You're welcome... No rush comin' back." Vincent replied, smiling much more fuller as Arthur pulled back.

Nodding one last time, Arthur leaned in wanting to kiss Vincent goodbye before releasing him and walking out so that he could catch up to Hosea and John with a small sigh.

Hosea owed him _big time_ for this, climbing up onto The Admiral, Arthur turned him toward the gate where he could see Hosea and John sitting on their horses. Taking a slow inhale, Arthur kicked his horse and started off toward his old comrades with Vincent's idea in his head... Why was he even thinking about it? Of course, the answer had to be no, that was just not something that Arthur could do... Especially after John had done it... But how long was he supposed to sacrifice everything he cared about for the sake of people who often treated him like he was expendable.

Shaking his head, Arthur forced the thought out of his mind as he approached, he couldn't even afford to be thinking about this right now. Barely sparing a glance to John, he noted that the other once again refused to look at him, which Arthur _almost_ reveled in but he said nothing as Hosea looked over.

"You ready?"

"As I'll ever be." Arthur grumbled.

The ride toward Copper Lake was _painfully_ awkward, John wasn't even sure how he was even going to do this anymore. Why did he even care if Arthur was involved with someone else..? It wasn't his business and he should be happy there was someone for him to sink his claws into... But he wasn't.

_Whenever you want me... Or whenever you don't... I'm yours, no matter what... I promise._

Biting his tongue, John kicked his horse just a little bit faster to put some distance between him and Arthur. That bitter resentment still boiled deep down... And John wasn't sure how long he was going to continue acting like he was the only person who had ever done anything wrong. He just... He didn't know what he was doing anymore, was it even worth coming back if every waking moment around Arthur was going to be nothing but agonizing?

"It's up this way." He said, his tone short and stiff as the town appeared in the distance.

While Arthur stayed silent, his glare continued to rest on John's back as if he was tracing a target with his eyes. How was he just supposed to forget what happened between them? How was he just supposed to act as if nothing had changed?

... Like John hadn't broken his heart.

Kicking his horse’s sides, Arthur just looked forward to when this meeting was over and he could return to Vincent.

> Is this what it feels like to be lonely?  
> And though I'm not afraid to know it won't be the same without you  
>   
> And now I'm far from home, and I'm not sure where to go  
> I never wanted to hurt you, but you wanted to hurt me  
> And then you left me in the cold  
>   
> So here's what it feels like to be lonely  
> And though I'm not afraid, I know I will be okay without you  
>   
> And now I'm far from home, and I'm not sure where to go  
> I never wanted to hurt you, but you wanted to hurt me  
> And then you left me in the cold
> 
> source: [Without You by Finding Hope (feat. Holly Drummond)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlY_ei-FnGY&ab_channel=AminiumMusic)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys I know I haven't left many notes lately but for real thank you to all those who have followed me from the beginning, this fic is one of my greatest achievements and I only plan to get better from here. <3 Thanks again so so so much for continuing to be on this journey with me! We're slowly starting to get to the end of this part I hope ya'll have your seatbelts ready!  
> -Eros


	22. The Three Wise Men

_Knock. Knock. Knock-Knock. Knock-Knock. Knock._

Bright eyes glanced up from their cup of morning tea as Josiah Trelawny sipped gingerly and took his time getting up out of his chair. Reaching into his inner pocket and pulling out his watch, he noted that John was just on time. Taking a breath as he prepared himself to help John reintroduce himself back into his way of life, Josiah walked over to the door and began to open it.

"I have to say, dear boy for a moment I thought you-" Josiah's words died in his throat as he saw none other than John Marston, Hosea Matthews, and a _very_ unhappy looking Arthur Morgan who rested his steaming glare upon him.

"It's alright, Trelawny." Hosea quickly defused, had Arthur not been in such a sour mood, he would have considered Josiah's face to be humorous, but he was beyond that.

"Sorry..." John mumbled, knowing that they had sufficiently startled the man, watching the other clear his throat.

"Well... I suppose this saves me the trouble of travel now doesn't it..? Come in then." Trelawny invited before stepping aside and holding the door open completely and only speaking again when the lock slid in place behind them. "I suppose you can venture that I wasn't expecting this..." He mused, eyeing John with confusion.

"Yeah well... I got overzealous I guess." John muttered, wanting to forget that look of pure unadulterated rage as Arthur caught him.

"That's neither really here nor there, now is it?" Arthur inquired, doing his best not to appear as pissed as he was.

"I suppose you're right... Is Dutch coming to meet with us?" Josiah asked out of curiosity.

"We thought that until we found out what we were up against, that he should lay low." Hosea replied evenly.

"Ah, of course, it's good to see you again Hosea." Josiah greeted politely.

"Likewise... John mentioned talk of some kind of government action?" Hosea asked seriously, watching a slightly grave look wash over Josiah's expression momentarily before he looked away as if he were contemplating.

"I'm afraid so. I thought John was being too cautious or at the very least foolish for wanting me to look into it... Believe me I tried to ignore him, no offense John." Josiah mused as both Hosea and John sat down while Arthur opted to stand, Josiah parked himself on the edge of his bed.

"None taken..." John sighed as he leaned his head back, allowing his eyes flutter shut for a few moments since he already knew what Josiah was about to say.

It was then that Arthur finally took a moment to glance over at John, he wasn't sure why he did it but he couldn't help but feel his anger beginning to mute slightly as he saw how pitiful John looked... But at the same time, he couldn't find it in himself to feel _bad_ for John either. He had brought this on himself, it wasn't longer than a few seconds before his eyes settled back onto Josiah to listen to that he had to say.

"So tell us about the Pinkertons." Hosea mentioned, arching a prominent brow at Josiah.

"Ah yes... The Pinkterton Detective Agents." Trelawny sighed before casting his gaze down. "I wish I had better news, but I have my suspicions that they're on their way right now."

"Why should we believe that?" Arthur inquired curiously enough. "We've kept our noses clean for how many months now? It seems a bit _convenient_ if you ask me." He added, somewhat eyeing John.

"I thought so at first too, and to be honest I wish it were. Do you remember Duncan Moody?" Josiah asked.

"Yes, we had some squabbles with them back in the day, before Colm was even a problem." Hosea noted. "Didn't he control the entire state of New Austin at one point?"

"Your memory serves you well Hosea." Josiah mused, nodding his head. "... He was hunted down and killed, as well as his company disbanded within four days, all major members faced the gallows within two weeks of Duncan's demise."

"Y-You can't be serious..." Arthur muttered with some shock.

He remembered Duncan well, he was the first man that he, Hosea, and Dutch shot at together as a team. He was a _mean_ bastard and the thought of him being apprehended with such ease and quickness had Arthur on edge even if he didn't want to believe what was said to be true.

"I'm afraid I am... They haven't just stopped at your enemies either, your old friend Gordon Lane from Nebraska, he and his boys are already gone too... You may argue that Duncan was already out to pasture but Gordon if I remember correctly was in his prime... He hung not even three months ago."

"G-Gordon too?" Hosea asked with hesitance to his tone. "How have we not heard any news of this?"

"Frankly because whoever is on your good side at the moment is either already dead or too afraid to warn you in fear of retaliation from the government... They plan for Dutch to be next."

"Over my dead body." Arthur scoffed.

"I assure you, dear Arthur, that you might just get to fulfill that promise." Trelawny murmured. "I haven't been able to dig up any traces of their information, where they've been getting it or how they've managed to eliminate so many of us so quickly but it's coming... And it's coming fast."

* * *

Vincent watched Arthur ride off into the distance as he walked out of the barn and sighed softly before shaking his head with a small smile. Arthur sure was an interesting man, there was no doubt about that... And yet... John.

Blinking, Vincent began walking back toward the house, he looked... So reserved, so drawn into himself. _That_ was the man who broke Arthur's heart, and Vincent had to admit that he was expecting someone much different.

_And one day he just left... Without me..._

Stopping by the front door, Vincent glanced back toward the nearly-complete barn. The men that his father had hired to get the job done we're doing very well despite the murder investigation and even told Vincent they would complete it just out of respect for his father without charge. It really took a huge burden off his shoulders and now all that was left was to finish paneling the roof.

_... You must have really loved him._

_... I did._

The fury in Arthur's eyes was unmistakable pain... And yet John's eyes also reflected that hurt that Vincent had seen on multiple occasions swirling through Arthur's eyes. Why he even cared was beyond him, it wasn't like John was a threat… But Vincent didn't even know where he stood with Arthur, true they were close... But how close _were_ they?

Swallowing harshly as a blush began rising up to his cheeks, Vincent walked into the house and gently kicked the door behind him not really bothering to lock it since he expected Arthur back at one point or another. He needed a wash and he needed to just forget about John. The likelihood of meeting him again was slim to none, especially after Arthur's reaction, such a feral pain...

Vincent had spent so long that morning tracking down the coyote's trail, and he had to admit that he was still sore after his horse had thrown him the day before... And Arthur's brutal treatment of him in private, not that he didn't love it, didn't help his aching back and muscles. Walking throughout his empty house, his heart couldn't help but clench momentarily at the eerie silence... His home used to be a place of safety but now...

Forcing himself through the small bit of anxiety, Vincent walked toward the washroom located just down the hall from the bedroom that he and Arthur were sharing. Of course, now he could move upstairs into the master bedroom but... He wasn't ready, and he wasn't sure if he ever would be.

Reaching up, Vincent began to unbutton his shirt after shutting the bathroom door behind him, all the thoughts of loneliness and worry about the ranch's future melding together as he prepared a bath, desperately needing to soak his soreness away. His shirt fell to the floor in a disgruntled heap and his belt was the next item he worked on, however upon passing himself in the mirror, he noted the rather territorial marks of passion leftover from Arthur... And Vincent couldn't help but smile a little.

Hesitantly, his fingers came up to gently brush against them, almost as if he were worried he'd rub them away... There were a few spread around his neck a couple in various places on his chest... Looking away, Vincent began to wonder about his feelings for Arthur... He had never really thought about it too hard, he had always been the type of person to just go with the flow of things, but with the way things between him and Arthur were going, what _did_ he feel about the other man?

Releasing a small breath, knowing that it just wasn't that simple, Vincent continued getting ready for his soak, and once he was finally lowering himself into the water he winced with the heat but soon a hiss of relief followed. Leaning back against the tub, Vincent allowed himself to just sit in the quiet and allow his thoughts to run wild.

... Was he in love with Arthur?

Opening his eyes quickly as a clenching in his heart distracted him he inhaled slowly... It was sure starting to feel like that.

Vincent wasn't a stupid man, he could see that Arthur wasn't someone who allowed himself to be tamed or tied down, but when Arthur looked at him with those eyes... It sometimes felt like maybe it was possible, and after all Arthur had done for him? Reaching up, Vincent ran some water over his face and groaned quietly.

Vincent stayed brooding in the water until his skin became wrinkly and pruney and the heat had lost most of its bite. He wasn't exactly sure what time it was but he really didn't care, with the snowfall just around the corner, there wasn't much to do until it came. Vincent was thankful that they didn't live somewhere where it was a major problem but they still got their fair share in the county in the dead of winter. It wasn't like he _had_ to get back to work...

For the first time in what felt like a long time, Vincent wanted to wallow.

After he was out and toweled off, Vincent wrapped the towel around his waist before venturing down the hall into his bedroom so that he could change accordingly, however when he walked in he paused, sitting on the edge of his bed and opening his bedside drawer. After a few moments of surfing inside, he pulled out the familiar picture of his brother that he had kept stashed away for so long.

It took a moment to swallow the lump that steadily began to form in his throat, but taking a slow deep breath, Vincent managed to look down at the photograph with something other than grief-stricken pain... The man who killed him was in jail.

However once again, Vincent felt something... Wrong. He _still_ couldn't put his finger on it, but allowing his eyes to flutter shut, Vincent forced his doubts away and put Isaac's picture back where it belonged on his nightstand instead of out of sight before Vincent flopped onto his back with a small huff, glaring slightly at the ceiling. He didn't even realize how heavy his eyes were until they fluttered shut once again... And sleep overcame him.

When Vincent awoke again, the sky was much darker than it was before, the sun was setting later than it used to anyway. Shivering slightly, Vincent let out a small array of curse words as he pushed himself up, remembering that he was still in a towel from his bath before... And he hadn't begun to heat the house up yet. Groaning, Vincent reached up and ran a hand through his slightly messy hair to gain some kind of control over it before standing up and meandering over to his wardrobe so that he could begin putting himself back together.

Digging through the few stacks of clean clothes, Vincent quickly pulled out a pair of jeans and slipped them on as well as snatching a stray belt that was stationed hanging on one of his bedposts and weaving it quickly through his belt loops until he heard his front door open and shut calmly. His heart sped up and his cheeks already threatened to turn red as he assumed Arthur had finally returned.

Not bothering to put on a shirt since he assumed Arthur would want to undress him anyway, he ventured out toward the living room.

"I was beginning to wonder where you had gotten off to-" Vincent stopped in his tracks as he realized that the men who had just walked into his house were _not_ who he was expecting.

There were three men, one of whom Vincent recognized to be his Uncle Jackson while the other two were unfamiliar, dressed in sharp black suits... One of the men sported a rather peculiar cheek scar and his eyes... They immediately put Vincent off.

"Vincent, my boy, I know this is short notice, I'm sorry for that." Jackson sighed as he reached up and rubbed the back of his neck nervously with a smile.

"It's alright... Can I ask who these gentlemen are with you?" Vincent asked in response as he cast his gaze aside, thankful to see a stray shirt laying over the sofa to which he snatched immediately and began covering himself up. "It's a little late for house calls isn't it?"

"We don't plan to take up any of your precious time... We just have a few questions, Mister Taylor, apologies for the time." The stranger mused as Vincent noted that the other man with him began walking around, and Vincent wasn't stupid enough not to notice he was being nosey, but what he was looking for was unknown.

"... Of course. Can I offer you, fellas, anything?" Vincent inquired curiously.

"Actually I was wondering if you have a restroom? We had a long ride." The other stranger replied, from what it looked like this one seemed to be the underling of the scarred man.

"Oh, of course. Just down the hall there." Vincent replied, pointing in the direction and watching him walk away before the scarred fella caught his attention again as he reached into his coat, pulling out a badge of some kind.

"I'll excuse myself to the kitchen so that y'all can have some privacy." Jackson mentioned before breaking away from the two and retreating out of sight.

"Allow me to introduce myself... I'm Detective Lee Osborn, I work with the Pinkerton Detective Agency hand-in-hand with the US Government. I'm currently tracking down a band of dangerous wanted criminals, and the intel I've gathered told me they were in the area just recently." He explained, watching a look of shock wash over Vincent's face.

"W-What? Surely you must be mistaken, we aren't a criminal hub." Vincent replied.

"You'd be surprised at how well they can blend in plain sight... One of whom we're looking for is a man named Dutch van der Linde." Lee mentioned, placing his badge back into his coat and pulling out an envelope. "Heard of the name?" Lee asked as he took out a few folded up papers from the envelope, unfurling one of them and holding it up for Vincent to see, it was a wanted poster.

From the amount of a reward, Vincent arched his brows but looking over the mustached man's face, he hummed and soon shook his head.

"I'm afraid not... Sorry, I feel like I'm wasting your time." Vincent mumbled as he finished buttoning up his shirt.

However as he looked up, he noticed that Lee's eyes were focused, _honed in_ on his neck... And like before, Vincent had an uneasy feeling beginning to creep up his spine, though as soon as it came Lee's eyes averted themselves and he shook his head casually before folding the paper back up and beginning to reveal the next wanted poster he had.

"No, anything helps. Cooperating is more than enough." Lee dismissed, watching as Vincent turned to look toward the hall, wondering where the other man had got to. "We're also after his right-hand man, Arthur Morgan..." He explained, and like clockwork, Vincent turned back only to be horrified by the wanted posters _close_ resemblance to Arthur... _His_ Arthur.

For a few moments, Vincent was completely speechless and stunned... No, there was no way that Arthur Callahan could be Arthur Morgan, there was just no way! Reaching forward, Vincent hesitantly took the paper in his hands and stared down at it with complete shock.

_... You don't know me... For all you know, I could be a wanted criminal or someone tryin' to hurt you... And you're givin' me access to your house? How do you know I won't try to rip you off or worse?_

For a moment, Vincent thought his world was spinning... He wanted to be sick, but quickly handing the paper back and regaining his composure, he quickly shook his head.

"N-No, I'm sorry, it doesn't ring a bell either..." He mumbled, averting his gaze, however as he looked back to Detective Osborn, he almost noted a smirk on the other's face.

"... That's a shame." He sighed, taking the paper from Vincent and placing the envelope back into his jacket. "He's a real dangerous man... A cold-blooded killer, you know how they all are... Wanting to change the world with one body at a time." He mused, watching Vincent becoming more and more uncomfortable.

"That _is_ a shame... But unfortunately, I can't help you, unless you fellas have any more posters to show me, I should probably ask you to leave, I have an early morning tomorrow." Vincent muttered, turning away from Detective Osborn.

"Of course, I didn't mean to disturb you... Oh, one more thing." The detective mentioned. "... Did he tell you to say that before or _after_ he fucked you?" He inquired, watching Vincent spin around with a look of utter abhorrence and disbelief.

"E-Excuse me!?" He snarled.

"Oh drop the act... It's written all over your face and your neck that he's latched onto you... Can't say I blame him, you're almost like a woman yourself." Detective Osborn sneered, beginning to walk toward Vincent.

"How dare you!" Vincent snarled. "You come into _my_ house and dare to insinuate something so severe!? Get out! U-Uncle!" Vincent called as he began backing away.

"Boss, found something." Suddenly the other man's voice popped up and when Vincent turned around he noted that the man that had asked to use the bathroom was holding Arthur's overnight bag in one hand and his journal in the other and reading it carefully. "This is definitely Arthur Morgan's."

Staring ahead at the man incredulously as his worst fears came true, when Vincent turned back, the detective was standing right in front of him, as well as Jackson meandering back into the room from the kitchen, leaning onto the archway casually.

"... You know what they do to queers around here... Don't you boy?" He asked softly before suddenly shoving Vincent up against the wall, his forearm pressing harshly against Vincent's windpipe and restricting his breathing. "If you don't want to end up like all of them... I suggest we revisit our questions."

Vincent coughed and sputtered as he struggled against the detective, frantically looking over to his Uncle who refused to even look in his direction. Why wasn't he doing anything!? He didn't understand!

"I'd love to stay and watch you interrogate my brother's whelp, but all I came here for one reason." Jackson scoffed. "I don't give a damn about what happens to him, but where's my deed?" He asked, making Vincent gasp softly as everything Myles was saying began to haunt him.

_Your Uncle Jackson... He paid me to burn your barn down._

_I-I... I wish that I... I know that nothin' can change what I did... But please... I didn't do it, I-I swear-!_

"Don't worry... I'll see to it by the end of the week that the title to this hovel is transferred over to your name as next of kin. We'll get it in front of a judge for your cooperation on this matter, and I suppose we can expunge the details surrounding your brother's death."

**_BA-BUMP._ **

Tears began to form in Vincent's eyes as he realized that this had been Jackson's plan all along, the realization sweeping over him that his own flesh and blood was the one to wipe every existence of his kin.

"Much appreciated... Have a nice life, Vincent... Whatever's left of it." Jackson chortled coldly before casually walking out of the farmhouse to leave Vincent to the detective's devices.

"Now where were we?" The detective inquired with a smirk as he pressed firmer against Vincent's neck.

"G-... Go to hell." Vincent hissed, glaring up at Lee with determination. "Y-You pretend to be for justice... And yet you'd let a man get away with murder of his own family... Say what you want about Arthur... But he ain't scum like you." He growled before spitting into Lee's face.

Surprise actually washed over the detective's expression as he reached up and carefully wiped the saliva off his cheek with his free hand before his glare settled dangerously onto Vincent. Taking a slow breath the detective wiped the insult delicately over his coat before without warning, backhanding Vincent across the face so hard he saw stars and landed with a hard _thud_ on the ground.

"... I was hoping I wouldn't have to mark up that pretty face of yours... But no matter... I will break you just like I did everyone else." Lee sighed with disinterest as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of black gloves, slipping them on with ease before kneeling next to Vincent and taking a fistful of his golden locks roughly, forcing his head to tilt upward to look at him. "Walker, does that journal say any specifics on where he and rest of them are held up?" The detective then inquired to his partner.

"Unfortunately not, it seems he's smart enough not to leave any evidence of their whereabouts." The other sighed.

"... That’s alright, he'll come back, won't he?" The detective chuckled softly as he looked down to Vincent. "... After all, he's gonna wanna see his little Goldilocks. So we'll just wait for him here... I can't imagine he'll be much longer." He mused as he reached forward to gently caress Vincent's cheek as the young man flinched away. "... But until then... We get to play a little."

> It's a new chance, a new day, avoiding  
> The thought of you coming over  
> Yeah, I've been drafted into you're war  
> I feel shafted waking up, on you're shore once again  
> I never really let you go, just thought that you should know  
> Even though you broke my bones you're soul  
> Is where I made my home, my home, my home
> 
> You where looking for another way out  
> Try to fix these broken things  
> All we had were fragments  
> You were stumbling a new way down,  
> Falling on you're broken wings,  
> All we had were fragments  
> (Ah man I guess that's it)
> 
> Can't blame it all on you, can't blame it all on me  
> We were to young to try To start a family  
> Of our own, of our own, of our own.  
> It's too bad you Finally, came to your senses,  
> I don't wanna hear a damn sentence, out of  
> You're mouth, out of you're Mouth.
> 
> You where looking for another way out  
> Try to fix these broken things  
> All we had were fragments  
> You were stumbling a new way down  
> Falling on you're broken wings  
> All we had were fragments
> 
> And it's hard looking back  
> Knowing what I could've done  
> I'm never going Back  
> I'm always on the run,  
> And you never really find  
> The pieces that you Leave behind  
> All I got from this place is fragments
> 
> You where looking for another way out  
> Try to fix these broken things  
> All we had were fragments  
> You were stumbling a new way down  
> Falling on you're Broken wings  
> All we had were fragments, fragments
> 
> source: [Fragments by Jaymes Young](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xvy_aHpRScA&ab_channel=AminiumMusic)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Just wanted to say I know this chapter is a little shorter so I'm sorry but I wanted to get the precursor to the plot that's about to unfold for real! I've also been receiving so many kind words so let me just say thank you soooooooooo much! It makes me so happy knowing others read and enjoy my work!  
> I hope ya'll have your yeehaws ready.  
> -Eros


	23. Everything I Wanted

Arthur, John, and Hosea all rode back to camp in a dreading silence of what was coming. Normally when threats arose Arthur and Hosea talked a lot but now... Well, he didn't even know where to start, he couldn't even comprehend his emotions at the moment let alone how to proceed. Arthur was many things at that moment, angry seemed to be at the forefront... Because John had been telling the truth.

"John." Hosea eventually piped up, looking back to his two boys riding behind them as he led the way and seeing John jump slightly before looking at him. "... Good job, son." He said simply before resuming his eyes on the road ahead of them.

Arthur couldn't help but look over again like he had in the hotel room, and his heart clenched when he saw the look of sheer shock over John's face as well as its expression melt into the smallest of smiles. However, when John glanced over to notice Arthur's glare it was quick to be wiped away and his stiff posture continued as they rode. Huffing quietly, Arthur's eyes turned away once more to spare him as he desperately tried to simmer his rage.

As they rolled in, John could already feel a few other glares upon him, but managing to dart his eyes over he was relieved when he noticed that Arthur's target was off his back for the moment as they dismounted. He walked around and ran his hand affectionately over Gypsy's nose until he noted Arthur and Hosea heading toward Dutch's tent and he couldn't help but limp behind them.

"Dutch, you in there?" Hosea called.

"Yeah! Come on in!" Dutch replied from inside.

Arthur watched Hosea dip inside, however in the corner of his eye he could see John following and he was quick to spin around and stop him in his tracks, noting the fear already arising in the younger man's eyes... While a couple of days ago Arthur would have relished it but now... Grimacing and looking away Arthur bit his tongue.

"... Not this time." He growled before walking into the tent without another word.

John breathed out slowly, that could have gone a whole lot worse. Despite the cold shoulder, he had to admit that a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Trelawny had backed him up just like they agreed upon... And it seemed that Trelawny's word was enough to cool Arthur down at least for now, truthfully he didn't give a fuck how Arthur felt but it was easier to survive in camp if Arthur wasn't itching to clobber him.

Turning around since he wasn't welcome inside the war council, John looked up just in time to note Abigail walking out of her tent with Jack in her arms... And his heartfelt lighter too. Was it too soon to approach her..? Would she even want to talk to him? Yes, their last conversation had gone pleasantly all things considered but that didn't mean things between them were like they were or ever would be again... But there was only one way to know for sure.

Swallowing harshly, John began trudging toward her, every step feeling heavy the closer he got until Jack looked toward him and babbled with delight. It disarmed John's barb-wired heart almost immediately and he wasn't prepared for when Abigail looked over at him with some surprise as whatever John had planned to say had left his mind.

"Uh... Hello, John." She greeted just a tad uneasily, watching the other shift slightly in place as a red hue came over his cheeks.

"U-Uh... Yeah... Hi." He greeted back just as awkwardly, but thankfully Jack squealed with laughter, almost as if he were laughing at the pitiful conversation going on between John and Abigail and his mother couldn't help but giggle, lifting some of the tension as John smiled too. "He really is somethin', huh?" He asked far more fluidly.

"He sure is... I got lucky that's for sure." She replied with a beaming smile up at John before looking back to her baby.

"Yeah... I sure did." He mumbled softly as he gazed at the scene of pure love in front of him.

"Hm, what was that?" Abigail asked, quickly turning her attention back to him.

"O-Oh, nothin'... Uh, I got a book if you..." John trailed off, feeling completely foolish as Abigail arched a brow.

"Well, sorry John but I got chores to do. I gotta wash the dishes." She mused, looking John up and down with clear amusement written in her gaze.

"Oh, of course... I just thought I'd offer." He said with a nod.

"... Well, why don't you come with me? You can read to me while I do it." She then asked, watching John's eyes light up immediately.

"You sure? I don't wanna bother you."

"Well if you ain't gonna be _doin'_ the dishes you could at least entertain the one who is." She snorted before turning away and walking toward Pearson's caravan, John marveling at her as she went but quickly catching up to her.

He felt pathetic, he felt like a _dog_... But it felt good for once.

* * *

"You're kiddin', Ol' Duncan Moody mighta been a fool but... Dead? Really?" Dutch asked as he sat on his cot while Arthur and Hosea explained the conversation with Trelawny.

"He had copies of the police report to prove it." Arthur sighed.

"... We only had a couple of dealings with Lane last year, you think they could have tailed us from that?"

"I don't know, whoever these people are, Dutch, they're thorough and they don't play games. They're wipin' everyone out." Hosea answered with a frown.

For a few moments, Arthur actually drowned out the conversation as he thought of Vincent... Wondering what he was doing, worried that John may have screwed things up between them... But Arthur breathed out slowly, knowing that if anyone would screw things up it was him, he was infamous for doing that.

"Arthur, you alright?" Dutch inquired, somewhat startling Arthur.

"Huh..? Yeah I just... Can't stop thinkin' about this." He muttered.

"Are you _sure_ it's worth bailing on that gold in Copper Lake? Remember Hosea that's a _good_ investment." Dutch sighed, watching Hosea hesitate slightly and sigh as well.

"I-I don't know what to think, Trelawny has no idea when they'd get here if they were even comin' _here_ but... Is it worth stickin' around and finding out?" Hosea asked, it wasn't too long before both Hosea and Dutch looked to Arthur and he was put on the spot.

"... What?" He asked.

"What do you mean what? What do you think?" Dutch asked with the roll of his eyes.

All at once Arthur froze for a moment... No, he didn't want to leave... If anything, Arthur wanted to stay forever, but life wasn't that easy and knowing that federal bounty hunters were after Dutch's head, somewhat literally, Arthur knew being selfish and risking his life wasn't an option... But the other option threatened to rip his heart out if he spoke.

"... I-... I agree with Hosea." He finally mumbled, clearing his throat and ignoring the slightly surprised expression on Hosea's face. "We don't have to be hurryin' or anything but... I think the longer we stay the more we risk." He explained, knowing that he was endangering Vincent just as much with his presence alone.

"... Maybe give it a week?" Dutch offered, compromising as he looked to Hosea and Arthur. "I say before we panic and leave some very good assets... We don't even know how powerful they really are, Duncan was past his prime, and Gordon... Well, I don't know enough about'em to say otherwise, but we can't panic." He explained.

"Are you sure?" Hosea asked with a frown.

"O'course... I'll get into contact with Trelawny and meet up with him myself. I wanna look over these so-called reports myself." He stated with a nod.

Arthur couldn't help but feel relief but with that relief came a sense of dread that he wasn't sure where it was coming from, but he just nodded and ducked out of the tent before Hosea could catch up to him. They must have been talking in there for almost half an hour. When Arthur looked up, his eyes ignited again as he saw none other than John leaning against Pearson's cabin reading as Abigail laughed and did the dishes... All at once the anger that threatened to boil over before was at the door again, and Arthur had to do everything he could to keep it at bay as he stalked forward.

"Eleanor swooned. Yet, _surely,_ the Duke was dead? She had seen him thrown off the galleon with her own two, _beautiful_ grey eyes. Could this **_dashing and handsome_ **vagabond with a scar across his cheek really be him? It seemed impossible yet in her heart she knew it was true, as true as their love that bound them together like swans that had been tied together." John mused, trying to keep the smile from surfacing but he quickly shook his head and took the book down from his view. "Is this really why you wanna know how to read?" He teased.

"It's better than you, you do a terrible Duke Mulberry." She laughed as she scrubbed away at dishes in the bucket.

"I can't argue that..." He snorted, however when he looked up and noted Arthur approaching he quickly smacked the book shut to Abigail's surprise before he carefully laid it on the table where the bucket of dishes was sat. "Uh, don't tell Mary-Beth I stole it alright..? Thanks." He murmured before suddenly departing from Abigail's side and walking toward the river out of sight.

Only when Jack squawked at Arthur from his little pillow bed on the floor that Abigail make-shifted to keep him from rolling around did she turn around and notice that it was Arthur and immediately she was put on edge as she looked away once again.

"... So you're getting all chummy with John now?" Arthur inquired, doing his best not to sound condescending.

"No, he was reading to me, that's all... Besides I don't need your permission to speak to anyone." She quipped.

"That's not what I meant." Arthur replied just as shortly.

"Then what did you mean? You surely walked over here with an attitude actin' like you want a fight, when if I remember right, I'm the one with grounds to be angry." She challenged, her eyes warning Arthur with an intensity that always intimidated him.

"So what because he read you a story, him skipping out on us is suddenly okay?" He scoffed.

"It's sure as hell more than you've been doing lately." She growled drying her hands sloppily and snatching Jack from the ground.

"Excuse me?" Arthur asked. "Do you have any clue how much money I've put in? Is that nothing? I may have been gone but I've been pulling _more_ than my weight."

"It's not about the goddamn money and you know that!" Abigail yelled, alerting everyone in camp who all turned toward them at the same time, both Abigail and Arthur stood rigid from their public spat but soon Abigail's hand reached up to cover her eyes as tears threatened to spill over. "You are _such_ an asshole." She snarled before quickly turning away and quickly retiring toward her tent and leaning Arthur with a blade full of guilt in his gut.

"Shit." Arthur sighed before quickly following after her, knowing that Abigail just received some leftover anger caused by John, carefully walking into the tent Abigail was sitting on her cot, looking away from him.

"Get out." She scoffed.

"Not without lettin' me apologize to you first." Arthur replied seriously before he took his seat next to her and accepting her cold shoulder willingly. "... You didn't deserve that, I know it's not about the money." He sighed, feeling Abigail somewhat relax next to him.

"... Why won't you talk to me, Arthur?" She suddenly asked. "Before Jack was born... I-I mean I know we weren't-aren't... But why are you bein' so distant lately? You avoid me and Jack... Is it him?"

"No, god no." Arthur quickly replied shaking his head before holding his head in his hands as he took a breath. "... I keep thinkin' that I'm protectin' you but I know I'm just protectin' myself, I can't keep avoiding reality forever."

"Then _talk_ to me Arthur, please I-I can't keep going in circles and gettin' hurt I can't do it anymore." She whimpered as she reached up and wiped at her eyes.

However, before she knew it, Arthur was embracing her, holding her tighter than he had in so long, she could feel his love through his embrace only making this more painful for both of them. Arthur almost slipped back into his old ways, wishing he was normal and wishing to god that he could love her the way she needed him to… But he knew that forcing it wasn't working from experience, and even if by some miracle that Abigail accepted his desire for men… Arthur wouldn't allow her to be sucked into him any longer, like a black hole that she couldn't escape…

"... No matter what anyone says or what you believe… I love you Abigail." He whispered, reaching up and caressing her hair gently, forcing himself to come clean with his feeling for the first time. "... But you deserve so much better… I know it sounds like an excuse but let me protect you one last time… From myself." He sighed, knowing it sounded a lot better in his head before he spoke.

"I-I don't understand." Abigail sniffed.

"Good… You probably shouldn't… I want you to be free Abigail even if…" Arthur trailed off as the image of her and John laughing by the dishes once more popped into his head. "If I can't make you happy… You deserve whoever can, no matter what I'll be behind you to support you but this…" He murmured as he leaned in and pressed his forehead against hers and inhaling her sweet scent.

"... I see." She eventually said, once more baffling Arthur with her tame reaction and for a moment he thought he would break.

"... I-I wish…" He stammered, his voice taking a painful turn and his eyes beginning to burn.

"I know." She replied tiredly, reaching over and resting her tiny hand in his as he intertwined their fingers.

Pulling away from her, once more Arthur was struck by her undeniable beauty. He felt like a complete fool for letting Abigail go... But this wasn't about how he felt, it was about letting her be happy even if it wasn't with him. Reaching up, Arthur ran a hand over her cheek before Abigail suddenly leaned in and pressed her lips against his. It only lasted a second but when she pulled away she hugged him tightly but he could feel his shoulder getting wet with her tears.

"... You owe me, Arthur Morgan."

Her words were short but so transparent to how she really felt and Arthur felt like the devil himself for destroying her... He had forgotten what hating himself was like, and he surely didn't miss it. His hands trembled against her small frame and just held her doing what he could to remain strong so she didn't have to... He didn't have the right to crumble now.

Arthur only walked out when he was certain that he had gathered his composure... But knowing everyone's eyes were on him after his and Abigail's small explosion, he couldn't bear being in camp anymore. Despite all the heartache that he had brought upon himself and caused for Abigail... He knew he made the right decision in the end. Reaching up and rubbing his eyes Arthur turned away and started walking toward the riverbed, wanting to wash his face and try to calm himself down.

He had completely forgotten someone else was around when he knelt at the flowing water cupping it in his hands and splashing it up into his face until he offhandedly glanced up and noticed John staring at him like an alien as he sat at his camp, he obviously wasn't expecting Arthur either.

Once more they were alone together... With nothing but a small creek to separate them. While Arthur wasn't sure what was happening or why his fists began to tremble and that anger that he had shoved down before was back with a vengeance, and soon he was walking through the water toward him. John couldn't help but squirm slightly and stand up just so that he could be ready to defend himself.

"I figured I'd come to you since I know that stream is too deep for you." Arthur taunted, watching John carefully his eyebrow twitching.

"What do you want, Arthur?" He asked.

"What? I thought you'd want to know what me, Dutch and Hosea decided." He defused somewhat watching John relax a little before speaking again. "... And to let you know that just because you brought something to our attention, doesn't mean we forgot what you did."

"I'd hate to think your memory was that shitty." John growled, his own resentment toward Arthur beginning to build at his obvious terrorizing.

"You see, it's comments like that that make me believe we shoulda cut your tongue out when we had the chance." Arthur scoffed before turning away. "... We're gonna wait around a week." He concluded before already starting his walk back, he just wanted to see John squirm a little, but John was far from done.

How _long_ was he supposed to let Arthur get away with being a piece of shit to him? How long was he supposed to take it? How long did he have to pretend that Arthur had no hand in this _at all!?_

"Wait." He spoke up, making Arthur pause but he didn't bother turning around. "... Don't you wanna know why I left?" He asked seriously for once making Arthur's heart speed up uncomfortably.

"... Why would I..? I woulda went with you... And you left without me, you made up your mind, obviously doesn't concern me." He replied seriously until he heard John chuckle.

"That's rich coming from you." He snorted, watching Arthur turn around, the look in his eyes beginning to morph into the stranger that John didn't recognize, but for once that didn't stop him. "... You know why." He sneered softly, narrowing his eyes at Arthur whose enraged expression began to contort into confusion. "It's why you can't stand seeing me with Abigail... You're doin' the _same_ thing to her you did to me... Aren't you?" he asked, briefly stunning Arthur.

"W-What are you..?" He mumbled.

"Not coming together yet..? I thought you were smarter than that Arthur, I suppose I gave you too much credit... After all, you were fucking Dutch behind my back for how long?" He spat.

**_BA-BUMP._ **

Arthur's face must have given him away because a cruel smirk swept over John's face.

Everything that day came together perfectly all of a sudden... John's attitude, his aura, the way he mercilessly beat that man to a bloody pulp. It all made sense now... Sweat began to form at Arthur's brow and nausea began to build in his gut as he reached up and wiped his mouth a bit.

John left... Because he had been with Dutch... It had nothing to do with Abigail at all.

Quickly turning away in case he heaved, Arthur looked out to the calmly swaying water.

"That's right... I knew there was somethin' off about the way you reacted about that one back at the ranch, are you fucking him too?" John spat.

What he _wasn't_ prepared for was for Arthur to tackle him to the floor, just his body weight alone was enough to force the air from John's lungs as they hit the floor with a harsh thud. Arthur already had the upper hand since he was in peak physical condition, pinning John down before straddling his waist and ready to deliver a hit that John was _certain_ would knock him unconscious, he quickly flinched and did what he could to cover his face as Arthur reared his fist back... But the blow never came, instead, John felt droplets of water gently falling onto his face and when he hesitantly opened his eyes he was stunned to see that Arthur's fist was still raised but tears were streaming down his face... He couldn't do it.

"... Goddamn you, John." He scoffed, his fist falling as if the energy had been sapped out of it. "I wanted you with everything I had!" He screamed now that John had no choice but to lay there and listen. "I wanted you more than I wanted to breathe! Because of that, I took everything! Every comment, every word that you said to hurt me! I took everything because goddammit John I couldn't eat or sleep or think! I couldn't do anything without thinking about you but you didn't want me and I accepted it! Don't you ever forget that!" He reminded. "For god sake John I was so fucking miserable... I wanted you so fucking bad but I couldn't have you... And Dutch..." he scoffed, shaking his head as he let out a small tearful chuckle.

"... Why didn't you tell me?" Suddenly John's voice chimed up, and Arthur looked down to see that John was shedding angry hurt tears just like he was. "Why did you keep playing me!?"

"I wasn't!"

"Bullshit!"

"I loved you, John!"

"You think I didn't!? I risked everything! I gave up _everything_!" John cried, trying to hold his tears in but it was useless. "You act like you're the only one whose hurt here! You lied to me! I trusted you and I risked everything with Abigail! I gave up my son because of you!"

Suddenly everything went quiet, both men huffing and breathing heavily as they got out the feelings they had been bottling up for too long.

"... I refuse to act like I forced you out... It was killing me." Arthur growled, his head hanging. "Wanting you... Watching you be happy, it was torture John." He sighed before eventually standing up and getting off of John. "... Dutch was the perfect distraction, I didn't even think you'd want me again."

"But why..? Why didn't you tell me?" John asked trying to wipe his eyes.

"... I don't even know... Maybe because I thought if you really had the balls to leave... That you'd take me with you." Arthur muttered, catching John off guard, it felt like someone had shoved a knife into his heart. "... It really doesn't matter... Does it?"

"... Are you with him? At the ranch?" John couldn't help but ask, but his tone shifted towards desperation and Arthur couldn't bring himself to look back.

"... Yes." He replied honestly for the first time.

John released a small huff akin to laughter but shook his head. Of course... Arthur was here, being happy while he had been in isolation, never able to see the kid that Abigail had been so excited to bring up.

"... What do you want from me, Arthur?" John asked as the moonlight shimmered off the lake, momentarily giving Arthur a much-needed distraction.

"I dunno... I really wanted to shoot you." Arthur replied dryly.

"... You did."

Briefly glancing back, Arthur wanted to say that it felt like old times going back and forth with John... But it wasn't, finally taking a breath Arthur reached up and wiped his bloodshot eyes, a small puff of fog coming from his nose as he did so.

"... I don't know why I came out here." He sighed.

"I don't either." John agreed coldly, finally turning his back to Arthur as well so that he could start his fire.

Without sparing another glance... Arthur just started walking, ignoring the freezing temperature of the water as it climbed up his calves. Truly... This was a waste of time. The only thing left to do was go see Vincent... Arthur knew that was the only way to possibly salvage this night, being able to hold him close and look at his sweet smile.

Arthur bee-lined passed anyone trying to get his attention, which thankfully wasn't many, before hopping on top of The Admiral and kicking his sides aggressively. He knew he would probably get scolded for just leaving camp, but Arthur just needed to be away from all the eyes that he could feel hovering on his form. He didn't even know what time it was, just that it was still dark by the time he had arrived back at the ranch.

The place was quiet, almost dreary but Arthur didn't really pay mind as he climbed off of The Admiral once he was parked by the house. However, Arthur paused, his heart just felt... So heavy. Leaning against his horse for a moment, he just breathed and stroked the beasts pelt along his neck and shut his eyes, just trying to shed some of the layers of self-hatred, regret, and guilt before going to see the one person who had been making him happy these last few months.

"... Thank you." Arthur said softly to the horse, who turned his massive head over to sniff at Arthur's hair that was still sloppily tied up.

Reaching up, Arthur untied the ribbon, allowing his hair to fall down his shoulders before finally looking toward the house and arching a brow when he noticed the lights in the front room were off. It couldn't have been that late right? Looking around, Arthur also noticed that the place was deserted... Something wasn't right.

Frowning, Arthur walked up to the door, carefully peering through the front window before trying the knob, it was locked. Strange... Furrowing his brows, Arthur began to worry until he saw a flicker of light in the barn, and turning toward it, there was just the slightest ray of light coming from the closed door. Tilting his head, Arthur began his approach, looking around carefully and feeling more dread with each step.

As he stepped up to the door, Arthur reached down and felt for his revolver before he hesitantly began to slide the large entrance open. The first thing that Arthur noticed was Vincent bloodied, tied up to a chair, and seemingly unconscious across the room, his clothing ripped here and there; he looked like hell. Terror fueled Arthur and before he could think rationally he bolted forward.

"Vincent!" He gasped, but before he could even get close-

**_WHACK._ **

Arthur fell to the floor instantly with a loud bang and nothing but the pain was radiating across the back of his head, neck, and back. His vision was already blurring and he was having issues staying conscious, but Arthur could see a figure or two skulking out of the shadows once he was down.

"Just like I thought, like a fish in a barrel." An unfamiliar voice snorted.

"What're we gonna do with the hand?" Another inquired.

"Take him with us, he ain't supposed to be comin' back remember? Besides, he can still be tried as an accomplice."

Groaning softly, Arthur's eyes searched around the nauseating swirling room until his eyes landed on Vincent, who still hadn't moved. His hand slowly, pathetically reached forward for him, but it was soon brought behind his back as his wrists were tied.

"V-Vin-..." Arthur mumbled, just desperately trying to stay conscious as he was suddenly hauled upward, eventually losing his fight and becoming silent as his world went black.

"About time, I thought we were gonna have to hit him again." Detective Osborn chortled as he threw Arthur over his shoulder. "Walker, you grab the hand."

As the two detectives exited the barn, Lee whistled for their horses and waited patiently until they cantered around, loading Arthur was easier said than done.

"Hey, whose horse is that?" The other mentioned, pointing to The Admiral who was eyeing them almost suspiciously as the scent of his master grew near the strangers.

"Probably Morgan's... Beauty though, ain't he?" Lee inquired with some surprise as he left Arthur on his own mount so he could approach the impressive stallion.

Right away, the detective could tell the animal was stand-offish, but deciding to try and reach forward anyway, he wasn't expecting the horse to whip around and sink his teeth into his palm. Upon releasing a cry, Walker quickly turned around at the sound of it.

"Boss you okay!?"

"Shut up!" Lee howled back before glaring the horse down. "... You stupid goddamn beast." he snarled, cradling his injured hand before reaching to his hip for his gun, Lee aligned the barrel with the horse's head...

_**BANG.** _

> Don't go to war for me  
> I'm not the one that you want me to be  
> Don't call me up at 2 A.M. tonight  
> It feels so damn good and I wish you would
> 
> Are we just gonna stay like this forever  
> Floating, I'm serious  
> My heart is furious  
> 'Cause I'm so confused when we're together  
> Feels like I'm choking, these emotions  
> I know I'm gonna let you down  
> So don't hold your breath now, yeah  
> Bittersweet in your mouth  
> Can you stomach the doubt?  
> I wish I could say what I'm feeling  
> I'm scared to let these words out
> 
> Don't go to war for me  
> I'm not the one that you want me to be  
> Don't call me up at 2 A.M. tonight  
> It feels so damn good and I wish you would  
> And don't cry no more for me  
> Don't waste your time convincing me  
> That maybe someday we'll get it right  
> 'Cause we never could, I wish that we would but we won't
> 
> So just don't  
> We won't, so just don't  
> But we won't, so just don't  
> Don't
> 
> I can't trust you  
> Baby, 'cause I don't want to  
> This isn't fun anymore  
> Never hurt like this before  
> Broken dishes on the floor  
> Hearts exploding  
> Tell me why I'm still holding  
> Onto the love that we've been breaking  
> Damn, I thought we'd make it
> 
> No other way to say it (don't, don't, don't)
> 
> Don't go to war for me  
> I'm not the one that you want me to be  
> Don't call me up at 2 A.M. tonight  
> It feels so damn good and I wish you would  
> And don't cry no more for me  
> Don't waste your time convincing me  
> That maybe someday we'll get it right  
> 'Cause we never could, I wish that we would
> 
> We burn faster than a cigarette in my mouth  
> I know it hurts, but baby, we can't stop now  
> Baby, we can't stop now
> 
> Don't go to war for me (don't go to war for me)  
> I'm not the one that you want me to be (that you want me to be)  
> Don't call me up at 2 A.M. tonight (call me up at 2 A.M tonight)  
> It feels so damn good and I wish you would  
> And don't cry no more for me  
> Don't waste your time convincing me  
> That maybe someday we'll get it right  
> 'Cause we never could, I wish that we would but we won't
> 
> So just don't  
> We won't, so just don't  
> But we won't, so just don't (we won't so just don't)  
> Don't  
> Don't  
> Don't
> 
> source: [We Won't by Jaymes Young (feat. Phoebe Ryan)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSkxQ__DKcA&ab_channel=LyricFantasy)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me I see you all looking at me like that-  
> In all seriousness, we are finally getting to the end of this part in the series! Probably the next chapter or two will be the end! I hope you all have enjoyed this wild ride with me and don't hate Vincent too much (even though he was cutting in on valuable Morston time). I can only hope the finale I have planned be great and as always thank you guys so much for keeping up!  
> -Eros


	24. Ends of the Earth

_ Blink _ .

A distinct and cold shudder tore up John's back as he sat in the woods alone. It actually caused him to break his gaze away from the fire and look around vigilantly... Something felt wrong in the world. He never considered himself to be a psychic, but these feelings came around only when the worst of things were happening. He remembered a feeling akin to this when Annabelle got shot and Arthur being with Dutch. It was a painful and dreadful feeling.

"You paranoid or somethin'?" Uncle's voice cut through the silence, causing John to jump and turn to his left to see him rolling up casually on his horses back.

"Oh, no I just felt somethin'... Weird." He mumbled as he relaxed some, welcoming the distraction after his confrontation with Arthur, he didn't even want to think about that right now.

"If anythin'  _ you're _ the weird one." Uncle chortled in good humor.

"I advise you to look in a mirror, old man." John scoffed.

"Oh, someone is touchy tonight." Uncle snorted in reply, John always hated how the vulture could read him like a book.

"... Sorry." he mumbled back.

However, as Uncle parked himself next to John like he had when he returned, John was shocked to feel a sense of comfort he never would have expected in the other's company... But the feeling of dread and downright terror wasn't leaving him, it was boiling in his gut, telling him to move, do  _ something _ .

"Hey uh... Is everyone alright back at camp?" He asked, inwardly cringing knowing how out-of-nowhere that question was.

"Sure, at least I think so why?" Uncle replied, but his answer didn't quell John's worries.

"... I'm gonna go check." He muttered before abruptly standing, grimacing and grunting at the state of his leg before whistling for Gypsy.

"W-What? Where ya goin'? I just got here!" Uncle whined as John hauled himself onto his horse as she strolled to his side and kicked her without a word.

The closer he got to camp, the worse he felt and he couldn't understand why. John had no reason not to believe Uncle, and he was certain that if something  _ actually _ happened he would have been told, or he would have  _ definitely _ heard gunfire he wasn't that far. Why did he feel like this!? He pulled back on Gypsy's reins as he saw the glow of the campfire in the distance and eventually slowed her to a stop when he got close, everything seemed calm. Taking a breath, John carefully slid off his saddle before looking around with narrowed eyes for  _ anything _ out of place.

After a few moments, he walked forward, starting to count faces. John ended up leaning against Pearson's caravan where he could see everyone. His eyes hovered over each face, memorizing them and logging them down, and for a moment he panicked when he couldn't find Abigail and Jack until she slipped out of her tent with him in his arms, gently pushing her sleeve back up over her shoulder, right... He was probably being fed.

That meant there were only two people missing... Dutch and Arthur.

For a moment... A hard pit settled in John's stomach and he thought he'd vomit, but thankfully the universe seemed to give him a break when he heard the rhythmic pattern of hooves stamping into the soil. Swiveling his head, he was more than relieved to see Dutch riding back into camp. John actually had to reach up to wipe the sweat that had gathered at his brow.

Dutch didn't know about him and Arthur, right? He couldn't have, there was no way... And yet, John couldn't help but feel some kind of resentment towards him. He felt guilty, but he was unable to shake it... He could have had anyone, why did he choose Arthur..? And why did Arthur choose Dutch..?

John's eyes fluttered shut as he thought back to his and Arthur's argument about an hour or so before now that he had calmed down.

_ I wanted you more than I wanted to breathe! Because of that, I took everything! Every comment, every word that you said to hurt me! I took everything because goddammit John I couldn't eat or sleep or think! I couldn't do anything without thinking about you but you didn't want me and I accepted it! Don't you ever forget that! _

John bit his lip... Because Arthur was right in that regard. He had treated Arthur like  _ shit _ for  _ years _ ... How could he be surprised that Arthur moved on?

But if he had moved on, why didn't he just say anything!? It wasn't like John didn't have grounds to be wary of Arthur, to begin with.

_ Dutch was the perfect distraction, I didn't even think you'd want me again. _

... Did John get it wrong?

"John, are you alright?"

Once again, saved by a member of the family he had abandoned, John glanced over to see Susan walking toward him. She wore a concerned expression as she looked at him and stopped by his side. He was quick to look away as he regained his composure, swallowing the lump in his throat for now as he remembered why he really came here.

"Yeah, I just... I dunno, I got a bad feeling so I came to check on everyone." He replied.

"What kinda bad feeling? Are you sick?" Susan asked, tilting her head.

"No, nothin' like that... It's hard to explain, but it looks like everyone is here." He sighed, reaching up and rubbing his eyes.

"Yeah, everyone except Arthur... You two get into it? He left lookin'... Almost as bad as you do right now." She mused, arching a curious brow.

"N-No..." John stated quickly despite the quickening of his heart as he thought of Arthur  _ not _ being here and safe. "... Excuse me, Miss Grimshaw."

Slowly inhaling, John walked forward where he could see Dutch and Hosea discussing how Dutch's trip away from camp had gone. Dutch had a nervously optimistic expression as Hosea glowered at him, typical for their relationship. For just a second, it warmed John's heart to see them acting like... Them again, but soon Dutch looked over and smiled broadly at John, almost confusing him.

"There you are, I was just tellin' Hosea how  _ my _ talk with Trelawny went." He replied.

"O-Oh?" John mumbled nervously, suddenly worried that Dutch got a different story.

"Don't bullshit the boy, he told you the same thing he told us... I'm tellin' you Dutch, we should just be safe and get away from here. We haven't been sharin' our plans with anyone, if we leave now they might lose us. The longer we stay, the harder it's gonna be to shake 'em." Hosea argued sternly.

"We don't have proof of that!" Dutch sighed. "We have a lot of time and effort invested in Copper Lake, and with Arthur's steady contributions we're  _ so close _ my friend."

"I feel like every time you say that we take ten steps backward." Hosea grumbled, watching Dutch walk away obviously done with listening to him while Hosea shook his head while John stood by him. "... He's gonna get us killed." He scoffed, rolling his eyes.

"Y-You think so?" John asked softly.

"Hm? No, of course not... But sometimes I worry." He replied casually before looking over at John's slightly grave visage. "You okay?"

John groaned softly since everyone seemed to be reading his obvious face, but he couldn't afford to be embarrassed. Eventually, John looked over camp again, once more coming to the conclusion that  _ Arthur  _ was the only one missing.

"... You know where Arthur is?" John finally asked, biting his pride and noting the surprised hue come over Hosea's eyes before he replied.

"No, but he's probably at that ranch he's been workin' at... Why?" He questioned, and while John knew he should have known that, hearing it from Hosea still hurt.

"... I just, I don't know I had this bad feeling and..." Trailing off, John finally looked to Hosea with a firm expression before gaining his courage. "Look, I-I know I haven't done anything back to earn your trust back but... Can you let me off the hook this one time..? I wanna go check on him." He stated seriously.

"... You think that's a good idea?" Hosea inquired more curiously than anything. "If I recall, you and Arthur have been repellent toward each other since you came back... What's with the sudden change of heart?"

"It's  _ not _ a change of heart." John growled in response before reaching up and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I-I just-"

"John." Hosea said gently, watching the young man open his resilient bronze hues to meet his before continuing. "... You've more than proven your worth. You don't need an escort from me, or anyone else to leave camp anymore." He said seriously, watching complete shock wash over John's face.

"R-... Really?" He asked quietly.

"Of course... You heard Trelawny, he backed up everything you said... And gave you the credit for bringing it to his attention, you've more than earned it." Hosea replied, for a moment he thought he saw tears gathering in John's eyes before gently tugging him forward to embrace him. "... Welcome home son."

John was afraid to blink, knowing if he did, his tears would indeed spill over, but his shaky hands slowly came up before hugging Hosea tightly and burying his face into the older man's shoulder. He had  _ desperately  _ wanted Hosea's approval again, and knowing that Hosea was scorning him hurt beyond belief, he still accepted it... Now it was all worth it. Reaching up, Hosea gently cradled the back of John's head as he felt the fabric on his shoulder getting wet.

"... I'll have someone go get your belongings, we'll find out where to set you up. Go do what you have to." Hosea eventually said.

John sniffed before pulling back, nodding, and quickly reaching up to wipe his eyes to see a proud smile on Hosea's face. He was being genuine... Hosea was really welcoming him back, John even managed a smile back before clicking his tongue for Gypsy and grabbing hold of her reins. After hoisting himself into her saddle, he spared one last look at Hosea who nodded at him, John exhaled and kicked Gypsy's sides.

* * *

When Arthur's blurred vision began to gain focus again, it was dark and the breeze was cold. He could hear a voice calling to him, but it was unfamiliar and he couldn't find where it was coming from until a bucket of ice-cold water was thrown onto him, forcing Arthur out of his unresponsive state. He gasped loudly, his stinging of the freezing water coupled with the near-freezing temperature of the November night, he started shivering immediately.

"There he is." The unfamiliar voice chuckled, and looking up, Arthur noticed a man standing before him... But not any man.

Arthur already knew exactly who he was, the large facial scar gave it away, and Arthur was quick to purse his lips as he did his best not to think about his bright red skin at the air's mercy, his sopping wet shirt only keeping him nice and cold.

"Do you know who I am?" The man then asked as Arthur puffed out a few breaths, gritting his teeth from the cold.

"... My daddy, comin' to finally check up on how my mama was fairin'?" Arthur scoffed.

Without hesitation, the man reared back and before Arthur could even see it coming, threw a solid punch across Arthur's face. It nearly dislocated his jaw and he groaned in response as he blinked rapidly to stop his world from spinning. When he looked back up to the man, he was frowning and gently rubbing his hand... From what Arthur could tell it was already wounded, he was lucky that the detective didn't have full strength in it, he was the real deal. Taking a breath, like before, the detective reached into his pocket, pulling out the same pair of black gloves he used earlier and slipped them on his hands.

"... You might not want to admit you know me... But you know him." He mused before stepping aside from Arthur's front.

When the rest of the scene was laid out before him, Arthur tensed as he saw Vincent as he had before. He didn't really look like he had moved at all since Arthur spotted him and tried to help. He was still bloodied and hunched over in the chair. Arthur's heart felt heavy and he balled his fists tightly.

"... What's he got to do with this..? Whoever that is, you got your facts wrong." He growled, doing whatever he could to save Vincent's skin.

"Oh..? Well, let's ask him that." Detective Osborn chuckled before he walked over to Vincent.

Arthur's heart began to speed up as he saw the man beginning to gently slap Vincent's face to wake him up. He was relieved that the man wasn't brutal enough to wake Vincent up the same way he was, but he knew this was only beginning. This would be a  _ long _ night...

"Hey there, handsome." Lee crooned as Vincent's eyes began to flutter, taking hold of the blonde man's chin to angle his face up as he came to. "Ready for more fun?" He inquired, Vincent's face contorting with disgust. "There's those eyes I like... So feisty."

Arthur's breaths came out in enraged huffs as he did his best to look as neutral as possible. What the fuck did he mean by  _ fun? _ One thing was for certain... Arthur already made a promise to disembowel this man with his bare  _ hands _ if he laid his disgusting hands on Vincent.

"However, before we do that... Look who decided to join us." Lee mentioned before motioning to Arthur while his partner continued to rifle through Arthur's belongings.

Arthur saw it instantly, the look of betrayal and disbelief cross Vincent's face, he had hoped all this time that this was a horrible misunderstanding... But it wasn't. Arthur really was the murderer they were looking for. Quickly, Vincent looked away, too ashamed to look at him.

"You recognize him yet?" Lee asked.

"... No, I  _ obviously _ don't know him." He replied with a sneer, with enough hurt for Arthur to avert his gaze in shame as well.

"That's really a shame... I suppose we'll find out for real when I fuck you with the barrel of my gun." Lee replied with a cruel smirk as Vincent gasped and looked over at him with a fear that he had  _ never _ in his life felt.

Those words set off the fire in Arthur, and despite freezing and losing the feeling in his fingers he lunged forward, almost knocking his chair forward, but was caught by Lee's partner just in time.

"Don't you dare touch him!" He snarled venomously, gaining both Vincent's and the Detective's attention.

"Seems I struck a nerve... It shouldn't matter to you what happens to this farmhand now, does it?" Lee inquired.

"You're sick." Arthur growled, shaking his head.

"No, Mister Morgan. I'm efficient... Now, unless you don't care about this boy, I suggest you tell me where the rest of your degenerate squatters are." He mused.

Arthur had never felt pressure like this in his life,  _ never  _ before had he truly  _ wanted  _ to give information to people of the law. He had never been in a situation that endangered any and everything he cared for. On one hand, there was Vincent, who was truly innocent in all this and truth be told, the closest thing Arthur came to loving over the past few months, and then there was the gang... His way of life... His family... What the fuck was he supposed to do..?

"Don't do it, Arthur!" Vincent suddenly gasped.

"Shut it." Lee snarled, backhanding Vincent roughly and shutting him up, but Arthur looked up and met Vincent's eyes.

They were determined... Stronger than most he had seen... If anyone could handle this...

Arthur's eyes finally fluttered shut and he hung his head, prepared for whatever was to come and regretfully sealing Vincent to his fate. Seeing the protest Arthur was putting up, Lee sighed with irritation, at least he had a reason to touch the farm hand now.

"... I expected nothing less from you, Arthur Morgan... No matter." Lee chuckled before reaching to his side and pulling out a knife before leaning forward and cutting the rope that was binding Vincent to the chair.

Looking up just momentarily with confusion, Arthur's heart fell into his stomach when he watched the detective kick Vincent forward onto the floor from behind. His wrists were still bound together separately and when Vincent fell to the dirt, Lee pushed the chair that he was sitting in away before shoving Vincent onto his back. Arthur tried to look away when the detective forced himself between Vincent's legs but a strong arm came from behind him around his neck and forcing his head in the direction.

"Don't think you can get outta this either." The other man that Arthur had forgotten about snickered, and while Arthur resisted and even attempted getting free, the freezing water from before rendered his energy completely gone... And he was forced to watch.

* * *

John rode forward, unsure of what time it was though frankly, it didn't matter... But what if Arthur and that farmhand were...  _ Together _ right now?

Shaking his head before he had a chance to talk himself out of this, John just kicked Gypsy's sides again. No, this feeling didn't come around often, something was definitely suspicious. Looking up as he approached a sign, John sighed in relief when he rode into Airdale. Looking around, there were still a few people walking about, so he assumed it wasn't too terribly late, it was just hard to tell with winter cutting their days short.

"Uh. hey excuse me, can you tell me the time?" John inquired to a passerby as he pulled back to stop his horse for the moment.

"Almost nine o'clock." The stranger responded.

"Thanks."

John sat on Gypsy after the interaction... Reminding himself that he could still turn around right now, but no... He couldn't. Reaching up, John ran a hand through his hair, he desperately needed it trimmed. All at once, he remembered how Annabelle used to cut his hair in camp and the conversations they used to have... Including those about Arthur.

No matter how much John hated to admit it, his and Arthur's lives would probably always be intertwined... It was just the way they were, John had no intentions of being romantic with him again, but he was quick to roll his eyes at himself recalling how that went last time. Kicking Gypsy forward, John just forced whatever thoughts on the future he had aside as he took the path toward the ranch.

As he approached the gate, John stopped, already feeling like he didn't belong here. He looked around the property, which was relatively quiet... He almost thought he was crazy until something toward the house caught John's eye. Furrowing his brows as he noticed... What looked like a blanket as well as someone's belongings strewn around the front yard, and bringing his scope around, John froze...

That was no blanket...

John's heart essentially sank and he wasted no more time in running Gypsy toward the carcass of none other than The Admiral, his body left to rot. The closer he got, the more he thought he'd lose it. He  _ hated  _ shooting horses, he only did it if the animal was suffering but the last time he had seen  _ this _ horse, he was happy and healthy... There was no way Arthur would do this, he loved this horse almost more than anything... This would destroy him unless... He was dead already too.

"No... No-no-no..." He said just above a whisper as he finally got to the downed horse's side.

John was  _ praying  _ that the horse was just lame... But he wasn't, on closer inspection, there was a clean bullet wound in his head. This was a fucking execution... A cruel one at that. John's breath shuddered as he hesitantly reached forward once he knelt by the loyal beast's side. He gently ran his hand over the cold jawline of the massive animal before reaching up and gently closing the horse's eyes so that he could rest peacefully.

"... What do I do...? What do I do?" John parroted in panic to no one in particular.

His breaths started coming in quick pants as he stood up, quickly spinning around, looking for  _ anything _ that could tell him where Arthur was. No... The first thing he had to do was go get help right? If anyone knew what to do, it would be Dutch and Hosea... But if this was the Pinkertons, could he risk leading Dutch right to them?

"Fuck!" John cried and held his head in his hands as he desperately tried thinking of a plan.

Plus, the longer he took in going to requisition reinforcements, the more likely that they would lose Arthur's trail... Trail!

Quickly turning back to The Admiral, John gasped before he hobbled over to Gypsy, shoving his hand into his saddlebag and pulling out his lantern. Turning it up, he quickly began scanning the ground looking for any kind of scuffle, but with Arthur's things thrown around it was hard to tell... What he did find were footprints leading to The Admiral's body, and following them, John found a pair of horse tracks leading south away from town... This had to be the people who took Arthur.

John quickly looked behind him... This was his last chance to go get help...

No... He could do this, he lived in the wilderness  _ alone _ for almost a year, he taught himself how to track, and how to  _ survive _ . If he wanted to prove to himself that he deserved a place back in the gang... He had to do this alone.

Hoping this wasn't a terrible decision, John mounted up. He almost felt it humorous how worried he was about Arthur... But if  _ anyone  _ was gonna kill that man, it would be him. With that thought firmly in his head, Gypsy sprinted forward, slowing every now and again as John tracked. Whoever these people were, they were careful... But not careful enough.

If John was being realistic, he knew these were the Pinkertons, but how could they have slipped by unnoticed by him  _ or _ Trelawny? The charming snake had kept a keen eye on the agents... But perhaps they knew that. It made sense... They expected to be spied on just as much as they did the spying themselves, they were good. Hopefully, assuming Arthur wasn't already dead or being shipped off to federal prison, Dutch would finally listen to reason.

The darkness of the night didn't help John any further, but it made spotting campfires much easier. After being led off the path, John began looking around for sources of light, knowing they couldn't be  _ too _ far from where they broke away from the road. They probably wanted to interrogate Arthur anyway, which meant they'd have to stop somewhere.

Puffs of fog came from John's lips, the cold temperature rending the search unbearable, but John refused to give up, he couldn't. He had been following the trail left by the assailants for about twenty minutes, and he knew he was close... He had to be. Arthur was running out of time!

John had to remind himself on multiple occasions to calm down, knowing if he panicked, he would never find Arthur. Reaching up, John gently pulled down the mask he had slipped on for the cold weather while he swiveled his head around. For a moment, all seemed hopeless until just the smallest speck of light caught John's attention. His carob eyes locked on the target before walking Gypsy forward, knowing he needed to get closer but he couldn't risk getting detected.

Now the darkness seemed to be an advantage, he could almost walk right up on them and not be seen, but he intended not to be so bold, especially if Arthur was in danger. Once more, that building of dread in his gut began climbing into his throat, and forcing John to swallow harshly.

When John felt he was a comfortable distance away, he slowly pulled out his gun to make sure not to draw any attention to himself just in case these men weren't who he was looking for, but as he put the scope up, for a moment John was confused. He couldn't get a clear vision of what was going on, but as he adjusted his magnification and focused carefully it was clear to see what was happening.

There were two men on the floor, one clearly on top of the other in a more than suggestive manner, and while John couldn't hear what was happening from here he was already getting uncomfortable watching the events unfold, but he couldn't get a clear view of the peoples faces.

"C'mon." He snarled softly to himself as he once again adjusted his grip on the rifle and surfed a bit upward.

Gasping softly when Arthur's face came into view, John could have cried, but before he could do that, the first thing he needed to do was access the situation... What the fuck was happening over there?

Now that Arthur was confirmed alive, John took a slow breath, knowing he only had one shot to make count, and while his first instinct was to nail the man holding Arthur hostage, his scope surfed back down just in time to see the apparent attacker in the situation rip open the other hostage's shirt. Arching a brow, once again confusion filled John's senses until he recognized the face of the man underneath.

_ You're John. _

It was the man Arthur admitted to being with... Now it was obvious what they were doing, and enraged John to his core. No matter how much he wanted to hate Vincent for existing, no one deserved such humiliation, they were probably trying to get Arthur to talk... Unlucky for Vincent, they were interrogating the wrong man.

"Shit." He hissed, realizing he had two targets now.

His barrel shifted from the apparent rapist to the man basically choke-holding Arthur, sweat once again forming at John's brow knowing if he chose the wrong target, both Arthur and the ranch owner could be killed... But eventually, John came to the conclusion that the rapist was always more dangerous.

* * *

Vincent struggled beneath the detective, flinching against the cold air when his shirt was ripped open, buttons flying everywhere as he was exposed. Reaching forward, Lee ran a gloved hand over Vincent's bare chest, taking special care to graze one of his nipples.

"I have to admit... This is my favorite part of the job." He snorted as he reached up and shrugged his suit jacket off since he and Vincent were next to the campfire, tossing it over to the chair but not bothering with his shirt since Vincent was the one being disrobed here. "Don't worry... I'm sure we can make this a memorable experience."

Vincent glared defiantly upward, not willing to submit even as the other leaned in, beginning to run his slimy tongue over his neck. Unable to stop it, Vincent released a shudder of disgust as he did what he could to get away from the intrusion, but it wasn't until he felt the other man's hands beginning to work at his belt that he felt truly powerless.

However, what happened next happened so fast that Vincent didn't even realize that it was blood that had been sprayed over his face and torso.

**_POP._ **

It was from a distance, but too quick for the detective to dodge it. Vincent winced when it happened, but when he opened his eyes, the detective wore a look of nothing but complete and utter shock as one of his hands came up to hold his throat while blood seemed to erupt beneath it... He had been shot through the throat.

"W-What the hell!?" His partner suddenly cried, but Arthur took the chance to distract him.

Suddenly lunging forward, Arthur latched his teeth onto the man's arm, earning a sharp and pained scream from him, but giving whoever it was enough time to rush in and finish the other one off while Vincent managed to kick the corpse of the detective off of him while he panted in sheer relief... But that was the only thing keeping him from losing it over the realization that someone's trachea had been splattered all over him.

John took the advantage, seeing that Arthur was still able to think on his toes. While the partner of the detective desperately tried getting his arm out of Arthur's mouth, he completely failed to realize that John was coming fast.

"Arthur duck!"

Without even needing explanation, Arthur released the other man's arm and suddenly threw his chair to the side, effectively knocking him over and taking himself out of range as John rode in with a double-barrel, pulling the trigger once Arthur was out of the way. At such a close range, the detective's partner didn't stand a chance... And all at once, it was over.

Arthur panted heavily as he laid on the floor, completely exhausted and still shivering, but as his eyes focused on Vincent still on the ground exposed so vulnerably like that... It was tearing him up, and he was soon to continue thrashing to get out of his binding. He didn't even have the right mindset to realize it was John of all people to rescue him until he felt John kneel behind him so he could begin cutting his wrists free... But Arthur was so panicked he couldn't stand it.

"Christ John hurry up!" He cried.

"I-I'm trying!" John replied, his hands still shaking before he managed to get his knife between Arthur's wrists and saw upwards.

The waiting was horrible, but once Arthur felt his wrists give away, he didn't hesitate shoving himself up, even though he stumbled from the hypothermia in his arms. He snatched the knife from John before rushing to Vincent's side and working on getting him freed.

While John could have been offended at the lack of thanks, in all honesty, he was just glad Arthur was taking the lead while he could just plop onto his rear and focus on calming his racing adrenaline. Reaching up, John just tiredly rubbed his eyes... At least the fire was still on even if there were a couple of dead bodies surrounding it...

Arthur only slightly fumbled but was careful not to risk accidentally cutting Vincent as the knife sliced through the rope... The relief he felt when the other was free was like nothing he experienced and he was quick to pull Vincent into his arms and embracing him tightly.

"I gotcha... I gotcha..." He whispered as Vincent weakly embraced him back.

Vincent panted heavily in Arthur's hold, almost making Arthur think he'd pass out... But to his surprise, when Vincent pulled back, while he was exhausted, he wasn't ready to throw in the towel yet.

"H-Help me up..." He mumbled.

Arthur nodded, backing away from Vincent before hauling his smaller body up to his two feet, quickly reaching out to support him as he stumbled but Vincent stabilized himself on his own. However, Arthur  _ wasn't  _ prepared for the sudden punch to ricochet off his cheek, surprisingly even in his exhausted state, Vincent packed one hell of a punch.

"H-Hey!" John barked as he watched the display, but Arthur silently held up his hand as John stood to defend him.

"No... No, it's alright... I deserve it." Arthur muttered calmly.

"... Damn right you do." Vincent hissed, narrowing his eyes at Arthur with distrust. "... H-How could you do this!? Were you usin' me this whole time!?"

"No! No I swear!" Arthur quickly replied. "I-I thought if I told you... It would put you in more danger... I-If I knew this coulda happened I woulda told you a long time ago!"

"Yeah, and I woulda told you to get lost a long time ago." Vincent sneered but all at once the venom seemed to be sucked out of him and he bit his lip. "... Is it true..?" He then asked. "... Is it true you're a wanted killer?"

"... Yes it's true." Arthur replied honestly.

"... All this time... You were helpin' me with Myles... It's no wonder you found him, you knew what the fuck you were doing." Vincent snickered, his tone devoid of humor.

"No, I swear! When I started workin' for you I... I was just lookin' for honest work, somethin' under the radar but... You and I... We-... I never intended for any of this to happen, it's just as real as who I am... I promise." Arthur begged, his eyes desperate as they met Vincent's.

"... Uh... L-Look..." John mumbled, already feeling immensely uncomfortable listening to this. "... Even if Arthur made a mistake... He cares about you... Trust me, I would know." He defended, unable to believe what had just come out of his mouth, why the fuck was he trying to help Arthur in his love life?

However, he noted the surprised look on Arthur's face as he glanced over, but John was quick to clear his throat and rub the back of his neck. Vincent seemed to simmer for the moment, but he sighed before looking away and holding his head in one of his hands.

"... Can you just... Take me home..? My head is killing me..." He muttered.

"Are you sure it's safe?" Arthur asked.

"I don't give a shit if it's safe... It's  _ my  _ house." Vincent snarled before doing what he could to cover himself back up, still processing what happened when he was originally kidnapped... Jackson admitted to killing his father.

"... I understand." Arthur sighed before reaching over to grab the coat that the detective had taken off and handing it to Vincent.

While he seemed hesitant since it was the detective's clothing, Vincent eventually took it and hesitantly nodded to Arthur before slipping it on and turning away so he could walk toward the horses that the Pinkerton's left behind.

Arthur took a breath after watching Vincent walk away, now that things had finally calmed down, Arthur was able to look around only to realize that John was alone... That he came to rescue him and Vincent by himself... Even after all the horrible shit Arthur said.

"Did... Did you come out here all alone?" Arthur asked, looking to John.

"U-Uh... Yeah, I was worried that going back to get anyone would waste time..." John replied, and for a moment Arthur's expression was unreadable.

On instinct, John averted his gaze, but when Arthur suddenly threw his arm around John and pulled him close, he gasped sharply. Arthur was... Hugging him?

"... Thank you." He whispered.

John stood there rigid and in complete shock, but Arthur didn't stay long. He released John after a few moments and nodded to him before turning his body to the fire and knelt. He desperately needed to warm up before they could go anywhere and while John ignored the color building on his cheeks, he quickly walked over to Gypsy and pulled out one of his extra coats. Arthur was probably almost twice his size, but this would work until Arthur was able to change properly. Returning to Arthur's side, John held out the offer to which the other looked more than relieved as he stood up and took it so that he could slip it over his form.

"Thanks... Hopefully Admiral is carryin' my spare." He mumbled, and without warning all color in John's face drained and a look of horror crossed his expression, catching Arthur's attention again. "... What? What is it?"

Vincent was standing by one of the horses that the detectives had left behind, but turning back to where Arthur and John were talking, he turned just in time to see Arthur nearly collapse into John's arms. He didn't hear what was said, but Arthur was in tears and John was holding him tightly.

For as angry as Arthur was when he saw John at the ranch... They looked perfect together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed this extra long PRE-final chapter! We're not done yet but I'm pretty sure the next chapter will be the FINAL installment in this part of the series! I hope you all liked this chapter because I am VERY proud of it! Thanks as always for reading!  
> -Eros


	25. The Agony of Regret

Arthur didn't take long to regain his composure when he learned the horrible fate of his horse, feeling Vincent leaning against him in front of him helped as they rode back. He decided to share a horse with him since the other seemed to have issues keeping upright and thankfully he didn't contest. Vincent just focused on keeping his eyes open as well as thinking of the events that occurred earlier in the evening.

_I don't give a damn about what happens to him, but where's my deed?_

_Much appreciated... Have a nice life, Vincent... Whatever's left of it._

"Arthur..." Vincent muttered.

"Hm?" Arthur replied softly, though as Vincent opened his mouth to confess what had really happened he paused, as if he couldn't' say it out loud.

"... I-I'm sorry... About your horse." He said, feeling Arthur take a deep breath before feeling one of his arms gently snake around his waist for comfort.

"It's alright, what's important is you're okay... He didn't... Hurt you did he?" Arthur asked.

"Well no, I gave myself a black eye and a split lip for fun." Vincent grumbled.

"I-I didn't mean-"

"I know what you meant..."

"... Did he?" Arthur finally asked again, dreading the answer but soon he felt Vincent's palm resting on the back of his hand.

"... No, you can rest easy about that." He replied, almost feeling the weight come off of Arthur's shoulders himself as he felt the larger man lean into him a little.

"I'm so sorry about this..."

"... I know."

The ride was silent from then on as John led the way, with both Arthur and Vincent injured he needed to make sure they weren't followed. Glancing back occasionally to make sure everything was still alright, he tried to ignore the stabbing in his heart every time he saw Arthur's arm so protectively around Vincent. He knew he had no right to be jealous, not that he was, but... It hurt. Why was he allowed to be happy?

The night was cold and bitter, and as the three men rolled through the gate, Vincent actually felt Arthur's chest shutter when the body of his horse came into view, though he managed to help Vincent down from the saddle before taking a breath and turning around.

There he was... Such a brilliant beautiful animal... And Arthur loved him.

"Goddammit..." He snarled, but his voice was trembling as he hesitantly walked forward before dropping to his knees next to the still stallion.

The pool of blood surrounding his head had almost frozen in the night, as Arthur reached forward, his hands momentarily bounced back from how cold his corpse was and it only drove the knife deeper that he was dead. Arthur rested his hands gently on the horse's coat, one on his jaw the other on his strong shoulders that had carried Arthur without complaint. Before he could help it, Arthur could feel the warmth cascading down his cheeks before he leaned down, resting his forehead into the horse's mane and releasing a small sob.

He hadn't felt such pain since he had lost the first mount he had bonded to in his younger years, Boadicea and his dog Copper. He and The Admiral were just linked and had been riding for _years_... Losing him felt like losing a limb. What kind of monster shoots a horse for fun..?

Suddenly feeling a hand resting on his shoulder, Arthur was shocked as he glanced over and saw John standing there. His heart fluttered but he soon nodded and reached up, wiping his eyes.

"Take your time..." John reassured. "I-I know how much he meant to you." He muttered, though he wasn't prepared to see the smallest of smiles cross Arthur's face before looking back to The Admiral.

"I know... You named him after all." He sniffed, and John was thankful that Arthur wasn't seeing his blush.

Vincent on the other hand was readying to approach Arthur to give his support but his body was abruptly frozen in place when he saw a different but familiar horse parked near the house... Of course, Arthur wouldn't notice because he was grieving but Vincent knew _exactly_ who it was. Vultures always scavenged skeletons after all.

Vincent wasn't sure what it was exactly... But it felt like something snapped, and slowly, he turned and began walking toward John's horse in a calm manner, not even sparing a glance at Arthur and John before reaching into Gypsy's saddle and pulling out the double barrel that the other had saved Arthur with... Vincent would only need one shot after all.

Neither Arthur nor John knew Vincent's plans before the sharp sound of Vincent kicking through his front door caught their attention, furrowing his brows as he saw the barrel in Vincent's hands Arthur quickly wiped his eyes again and rose.

"What the hell?" He asked, quickly following suit with John.

Vincent, on the other hand, put all his strength into kicking the door, wanting to make sure he announced his presence. As soon as he turned into the kitchen there he was... Standing at the table with a bag most likely full of valuables.

"... I knew I'd find you here." Vincent mused, taking aim at none other than his Uncle Jackson who stood surprised as he noted all the viscera that saturated Vincent's clothing and face, as well as wearing the Detective's own coat.

"... So they couldn't do it, huh?" Jackson scoffed as Arthur and John walked in to see the surprising scene unfolding.

"V-Vincent what the hell are you doin'?" Arthur asked.

"He's actin' crazy, you should take the gun away before he gets someone killed." Jackson scoffed, holding his hands up.

"Crazy..? Maybe I am crazy... Being kidnapped and forced to perform does that to circus animals, didn't you know that?" Vincent asked as his finger hovered over the trigger.

"Vincent, calm down now, what's goin' on here?" Arthur asked, stepping toward the blonde.

"... He did it Arthur... He was the one who killed my fucking father."

"Your father killed himself when he refused to put me on the title of this place."

"Jesus..." John muttered.

"All this time... All this time I defended you! All this time, my pa always opened our door for you! Why!? For this goddamn property!?" Vincent yelled.

"You don't know what the fuck you're talkin' about you little shit, you never did! You really think your pa was gonna show you the workings of this place!? The dream of his kid's takin' over this place died when your brother did and you know that." Jackson spat cruelly.

"That's because you killed him you son of a bitch!"

"Vincent..." Arthur said calmly, watching the others heartbroken eyes looking over at him erratically as the finger over the trigger shook, he couldn't pull the trigger. "... Gimme the gun."

"What!? A-And let him get away-"

"I'll do it." Arthur said, watching Vincent pause and furrow his brows with confusion. "... Come on, don't do this... Don't put this on yourself. He ain't worth it, trust me revenge is a fool's errand." He explained, slowly watching Vincent calm down.

Killing a person changed people, and Arthur knew that Vincent was a kind soul by nature, someone who couldn't take life without thinking about the consequences. Putting that kind of pressure on him felt wrong... And after Jackson's confession, Arthur had no problem with filling his body full of shrapnel for his horse that got killed in the crossfire. For a moment... Vincent almost handed it over.

"... You're weak, just like your father-"

**_BANG._ **

Arthur and John jumped as Vincent pulled the trigger... His eyes cold and unfeeling as all at once Jackson's words stopped and his body fell over wordlessly with a _thump._

"... No, I'm not." Vincent muttered before throwing the gun over his shoulder and taking a breath.

"... You alright?" Arthur asked softly.

"Surprisingly... I'm just fine." Vincent replied before turning over, he looked exhausted. "... I don't think I gotta worry about this place being unsafe anymore." He sighed before looking to John and remembering he took the other's gun. "Sorry, I think this is yours." He then added, handing John the shotgun who took it carefully.

"Uh... No problem." He said, realizing that it probably wasn't the best idea to get on this guy's bad side. "I-I'll wait outside, Arthur." He mentioned before making a smooth departure.

Arthur nodded before looking to Vincent who leaned against the wall and slowly slid down to his rear with a groan. He couldn't help but be relieved before mirroring the other's actions and sitting next to him.

"That was..."

"Crazy..?"

"Nah... I was gonna say impressive. It took guts." Arthur replied.

"Please don't praise me for this... I didn't take pleasure in it." Vincent sighed, reaching up and rubbing his eyes.

"Sorry, forgot you're not a hardened criminal like me." Arthur mused, though seeing Vincent's unamused look he smiled sheepishly. "Bad joke... Sorry." He added, but he relaxed some as he felt Vincent lean against him and exhale.

"It's not you... This was just... A lot... Now I gotta call the Sheriff and try to explain all this." Vincent groaned softly.

"Sheriff? Nah, not for people like this... He just needs a shallow grave somewhere." Arthur mentioned.

"Arthur!" Vincent scoffed.

"You disagree..?"

"... No."

"I thought so... Look, I'll take care of this." He said before pushing himself up with a small grunt of soreness.

"W-What? No, you don't have to clean up after me I-ah!" Vincent gasped as he went to push himself up as well but stumbling before quickly grasping at his side as Arthur caught him.

"... I don’t think you gotta choice." Arthur said with a small frown as he reached up and ran his hand through Vincent's hair as the other breathed harshly against him.

"Y-You kidding..? This is nothin'." Vincent huffed before he pulled away some to look up at Arthur, his gaze softening as it met Arthur's and despite wanting to stay mad... It was hard. "... I'm still mad at you." He clarified, mostly for himself.

"I don't doubt it... So let me start makin' it up to you now while you clean yourself up... The detectives were nice enough to shower me off." He snorted, watching Vincent finally crack a small smile before hesitantly looking over to the body that he had just shot.

"... I did that, huh?" He murmured, watching Arthur frown a little with concern.

"... Yeah." He replied.

Vincent nodded before he took a breath, but Arthur was quick to embrace him tightly, wishing he could have spared Vincent that burden... But maybe it was for the best in the end, he finally got closure and his family could rest in peace.

"Suppose I'll go drop the charges against Myles tomorrow too... He can survive one more night after the hell he put me through." Vincent then added before pulling back and looking up to Arthur. "... Wanna come with me?" He offered, watching Arthur relax considerably.

"... Yeah. I'll be back tomorrow." He promised.

"Good. I'll make sure your horse is taken care of." Vincent mentioned.

"... Thank you."

Trying to forget that his loyal horse was gone, Arthur trudged toward Jackson's body and hauling him up and over his shoulder. He only left after he made sure Vincent was alright and upon walking out, he noted John leaning against one of the fence posts near the house smoking a cigarette... Still waiting for him. Arthur didn't understand the loyalty that John had always given him, no matter how much he seemed to screw things up, John was there... But that also didn't change that he ditched them.

Taking a breath, Arthur began venturing toward him and John glanced over, arching his brows when he saw Arthur hauling Jackson's corpse.

"Sorry, I volunteered to get rid of this... You don't have to wait for me." Arthur sighed.

"Oh, no it's alright... Why don't we just dump it in the river by camp? It'll be easy and even if he washes up somewhere... It'll be far from here. It saves us the trouble of digging." John suggested, normally Arthur liked to be more careful but... He was so tired.

"... Sounds good enough. I guess I'll-"

"Here, load him up on Gypsy so you can go get your saddle..." John mentioned before whistling quickly for his horse.

Arthur gawked for a moment before nodding hesitantly and carefully slinging the body over onto the mare as she shifted in place. He couldn't help but be surprised and before he left to give his final goodbyes to his horse he paused.

"... You know this doesn't just suddenly change everything... Right?" He asked softly.

"... Yeah, I know." John replied, regret lacing his tone.

Arthur knew he didn't have to torture John or himself any longer, so he just nodded and walked back to his downed horse. It was torture to take his saddle away and put it on another horse it felt wrong, but he just reminded himself it wasn't the horse's fault. Before he mounted up, he walked around to the beasts front. She was obviously stressed with everything that had happened in the night, a new rider probably didn't help.

"It's alright, girl... I know." He cooed softly, reaching in and gently shushing her while running a hand over her nose.

Recalling he always kept treats for The Admiral in his bag, he walked around and snagged a carrot so he could offer it. The horse seemed to calm as well at the sight of the veggie and after scarfing it down, she lipped Arthur's hand for more.

"Don't worry, there's plenty more where that came from." He promised.

Arthur knew that this horse wouldn't be his permanent mount but she would do for now. It was better than nothing, but he couldn't bring himself to look at The Admiral again before pulling himself into the saddle and walking her over to John. However, before John got atop Gypsy, he recalled picking something up from one of the bodies of the detectives, and walking to Arthur's side, he suddenly held out the other's journal out to him.

"Here, before I forget... One of those assholes was carryin' it." He mentioned.

Arthur seemed shocked, it had been a long time since he had made an entry and boy did he have a lot to write about... But he didn't even realize it was missing. He was relieved and he reached out, taking it from John with a silent nod before following his form as he climbed on top of Gypsy.

He tried not to, but Arthur's eyes hovered over John for most of the ride back toward camp... He thought a lot as they rode. There was no doubt that after tonight they would have to leave, he just hoped he'd get a chance to say goodbye to Vincent before doing so.

There also was a thought about what to do about John... Yes, he left, but he had no obligation to come to save his ass, and thanks to John... Vincent was spared some serious humiliation or worse, he did owe him. For most of the ride, all Arthur could think of was how to make things even between them.

Despite wanting to just fall to the floor and pass out, the first thing they had to do was get rid of Jackson's body that was hunched over on John’s horse. They rode mostly silent, but side by side toward the river where John was originally staying by, avoiding camp until the evidence was disposed of. As the water rippled and caught the pair's attention, they slowed their mounts and Arthur climbed down.

The smell of iron was making the mare anxious, so he was hasty in pulling the body off of her. It just kept reminding Arthur how much he _missed_ his horse already... He was a tough bastard, didn't care about the dead or living for that matter, he tolerated Dutch and Abigail, but only ever showed true affection to Arthur and John... Which Arthur always found funny.

Arthur grunted softly and actually stumbled to the floor, causing John to glance over and gasp softly before hurrying off Gypsy and kneeling by Arthur's side so that he could transfer the body into his arms. The cold temperature was finally catching up to him.

"S-Sorry I'm fine just gimme a minute..." Arthur muttered, but John just took the body anyway.

"You've had a long night... It's alright, besides you did most of the work." He mentioned, actually catching Arthur off guard with the little joke as he approached the water.

Arthur panted softly, his breaths coming out in puffs of fog, and recalling he had basically soaked John's jacket from the wet shirt he was currently wearing he cursed softly. Just another thing he owed John for... But after catching his breath, he reminded himself that thinking like that was wrong. Why couldn't he get rid of the insufferable bitterness that shrouded his opinion of John, and how could everyone else seem to forgive him so easily?

Simple... They weren't sleeping with him.

Arthur bit his lip as he remembered how fucking happy he and John were... How did it ever come to this?

_Take the girl, Dutch._

Arthur's hands balled into fists... Still, even years later, Arthur remembered that day vividly.

He shook his head quickly, knowing there was no use dwelling on the past before he carefully shrugged the jacket off. He had to get something dry on his body, which meant the shirt was coming off. He quickly unbuttoned the garment and tugged it off his body, exposing his damp skin to the winter air, he shivered but quickly went digging into his saddle, praying for a spare.

As John was walking back toward the horses, his stride was stopped in its tracks as he saw Arthur's bare skin from behind for the first time in what felt like ages, but it wasn't nostalgia he was feeling as he saw scratches that aligned Arthur's back... And John knew exactly what they were because he himself had created numerous of them there as well. They were marks of passion... He couldn't deny it any longer that Arthur and Vincent were together, even if he wanted to blatantly ignore the evidence and confession from before.

And yet... There he was... Standing there... Looking so fucking perfect.

Arthur could have cheered if he wasn't so exhausted when he pulled out a shirt, it wasn't exactly built for winter, but he was also lucky enough to have his own coat as well. When he felt the insulated wolf pelted jacket that Susan had made him one Christmas a few years back cover his body, he released an actual sigh of relief before noting John in his peripheral. When he turned his attention over, John was quick to blink and avert his gaze before continuing toward Gypsy.

"It's done." He said as casually as he could, clearing his throat as he did so.

"Thanks... For all of this." Arthur said genuinely, giving John some much-needed relief of his own.

"Yeah well... I owe you." John mumbled softly, his pride wanting to squash him for uttering such a thing be it true or not.

Arthur couldn't help but release a small tired chuckle as he was thinking the same thing in the opposite respect. They both had done shitty things to each other... It could be argued which one of them was worse, but Arthur knew it was too close a call.

"Nah... We both..." Arthur trailed off, a stiffness settling in the air, but he inhaled sharply and shook his head. "Let's just... Go our separate ways from here..." He suggested.

John didn't know what was worse, being at odds with Arthur or being omitted from his life... But maybe it was for the best, obviously, they didn't go well together no matter how much they tried... They just couldn't. John cast his gaze downward as he felt the burning sensation behind his eyes getting stronger and stronger, but he breathed slowly, calming the erratic beating of his heart for long enough to nod.

"... Yeah."

"Here."

John glanced up, jumping slightly when he noticed how close Arthur had gotten to return his jacket to him... With him so near, John could see all the details about Arthur that he used to think about on the daily, like what his stubble felt like against his fingertips when they kissed, or the way his chin scar stood out amongst his beard... And his striking blue eyes that always seem to look into John and disarm him to his very core.

All at once... John fell apart.

Pinching his eyes shut, John turned his face away as he let out a soft chuckle, but it was hollow and devoid of humor, a chuckle that Arthur knew to be wary of... But when John opened his eyes to reveal that tears were overflowing them, Arthur almost staggered back in surprise.

"... I hate you... So much." John said just above a whisper.

Arthur stood there in silence, he knew this was coming but... Damn did it hurt to hear... And it was worse to see how much it hurt John to say it.

"... I don't blame you."

"Don't." John snapped. "You don't get to do that... You don't get to be sorry." He sneered.

Arthur suddenly felt like he was in a time capsule, looking at John so defeated and heartbroken... It was as if he was looking in a mirror when John had left.

_YOU DON'T GET TO BE ANGRY!_

_You don't get to get to tell us what we should have done better!_

_I swear to god... If you say one more... Goddamn word about him..._

"You think this is easy for me..? That _any_ of this was easy?" John asked. "It felt meaningless... I felt like I was a goddamn child all over again... Wandering without a purpose, but now I didn't have Dutch, or you, or Hosea... Anyone..." He scoffed, shaking his head. "And before you say it, I know... I chose it... But that's because I would rather have sacrificed everything rather than be there with you." He snarled, turning his sharp eyes toward Arthur.

It was as if Arthur could see John's bleeding heart laid out bare... And it was far more painful than he thought it would have been.

"And yet... You've been here... Happy... With _him._ "

"John..."

"DON'T!" John screamed.

A few birds in the trees scattered as John's grief-stricken cry echoed across the landscape, but a deafening silence soon followed. Arthur just stood in the quiet... Knowing if anything, he _definitely_ owed this to John, but the other huffed out a few breaths, seeming to exhaust himself as well. He soon turned around completely, reaching up and wiping his eyes.

"Don't mistake this for something it's not... I saved you because it would be easier for me in the long run... That's all." John then spat before climbing on top of Gypsy and quickly kicking her away from Arthur.

Arthur was still holding out John's jacket when the other rode away... And when he was alone with the silence, only then did Arthur let out a long-held breath. It seemed that despite all the anger he felt toward John, he had forgotten that the other was just as hurt... And just as angry. John had changed a lot since he had been gone, no longer a passive boy that lacked confidence in his emotions, but Arthur... He was still just as much of an asshole.

The softest of cold sensations landed upon Arthur's nose catching his attention, and when he looked up he noted that thousands, maybe even millions of snowflakes had begun to descend on the valley. Arthur's eyes fluttered shut... Of course... Snow.

He wasn't sure what time it was when he returned, but Arthur noted that John's things were now _in camp_ which meant that his return was official, and surprisingly he wasn't nearly as against it as he was just a day prior... He wasn't thrilled with how fast everyone seemed to _forget_ his serious crime, but... Perhaps for tonight, he could give it a break.

Arthur wasn't so shocked that John was nowhere to be seen, but he tied down his new mount and made sure that she was properly blanketed before approaching the firepit that was currently occupied by Hosea and Susan wearing the appropriate winter gear, it must have been early morning. His injuries must have been pretty obvious too, because both Hosea and Susan alike gawked at his approach.

"Christ Arthur, what the hell happened?" She asked as Arthur plopped himself next to the warmth he desperately needed, but without words, his head lulled up towards Hosea and his exhausted eyes seemed to do the talking for him.

"... No, they can't be here already." Hosea murmured, his voice laced with worry.

"... Afraid so, and they don't play nice." Arthur replied.

"... Miss Grimshaw, can you maybe patch Arthur up..? He looks exhausted, and we'll be having a long chat with Dutch when he wakes up." Hosea then stated with a tone of seriousness.

"Uh... Sure, of course. C'mon then, Mister Morgan, can you stand?" She inquired.

"I think so." Arthur sighed since he had just sat down, but he pushed himself up with relatively no issue, thanks to John he was only sore... Not worse.

Susan sat Arthur down near his tent with the bag of medical supplies, she ended up sewing up one of Arthur's eyebrows and bandaging one of his cheeks, but overall he was lucky. She was rather gentle with him, which Arthur was eternally grateful for, but he almost wished that she wasn't. He had gotten sloppy playing make-believe with Vincent and got caught up by the law, only to be saved by the gang's outcast, he didn't deserve her tact.

 _You think this is easy for me..? That_ **_any_ ** _of this was easy?_

Those words kept going through Arthur's mind over and over again as he finally laid in his cot, and while all he wanted to do was sleep... All he could think about was John as he held the other’s jacket against him in the night. No matter how much he wanted to deny it... There was a sense of ease that Arthur felt, knowing John was here... And safe, even if the other hated him.

* * *

"Arthur! Arthur!"

The sound of Dutch's panicked voice had Arthur actually rolling off his cot in shock and once he hit the floor with an ungraceful _oof_ and remembering how sore he was, he looked up just in time to see Dutch rush into his tent.

"W-What is it? Are we bein' attacked?" Arthur asked in panic as he pushed himself over onto his back and sat up.

"What? No, Hosea just told me you got roughed up bad last night. What the hell happened?" Dutch asked.

Ah... Of course, no emergency. Arthur just sighed as he laid back down onto the ground with a small groan, watching Hosea walk in shortly after with a rather proud smile plastered on his face. Fucker.

"We already got the short version from John... Really, what happened?" Hosea inquired as he walked over and sat onto Arthur's cot while he finally pushed himself back up into the sitting position once again.

"They play dirty, they used one of the ranch hands as bait." Arthur sighed as he reached up and rubbed his jaw.

"And it worked?" Dutch asked with a level of disbelief, but a blush soon broke out over Arthur's face, thankfully Hosea kept the conversation moving.

"Nevermind that, what did they look like? What was their motive?" Hosea questioned to spare Arthur any awkward explanations.

"Well, honestly one of ‘em exactly like John and Trelawny described, scar and all... I-I never got a name, but they were definitely lookin' for us Dutch. He had our wanted posters and interrogated me and the hand... Don't worry, he didn't get anything useful before Marston put 'em down." He explained to the best of his abilities. "They'll do whatever they can to get to Dutch, and I don't think this is the last of 'em."

Dutch had a hard look on his face, but seeing the facial injuries Arthur had sustained, and the fact they neither he nor Hosea realized that Arthur was gone... This was a problem even if he didn't want to admit it. He sighed softly and reached up, gently running a few fingers over his mustache in contemplation.

"Honestly Dutch, I don't think it's worth the risk." Hosea eventually piped up, of course having to be the voice of reason in their trio.

"... Perhaps you're right my friend." Dutch sighed.

"The good news is, this will give us time. They won't know what to do for a while, I think we should take the opportunity to cover our tracks. Arthur, you think your ranch friend is trustworthy?" Hosea inquired.

Arthur blinked as he thought, recalling that Vincent was actually willing to be sexually assaulted rather than allow Arthur to incriminate himself, to which he nodded firmly.

"Yes I do." He confirmed.

"Good... But you should probably go tie up any loose ends you might have... I don't expect we'll be around much longer." Hosea said, Arthur noted his apologetic look.

Yes... Arthur knew this day was coming... But now that it was here... His heart felt so heavy.

"Yeah, I'll do that."

"Arthur." Dutch then mused, catching his attention. "... I'm sorry about your horse."

Arthur bit his tongue as his gaze fell to the floor, just another agonizing detail he had forgotten in his sleep, but he nodded, and feeling a warm supportive hand land on his shoulder, he glanced up to see Dutch there for him as always. For a moment, Arthur _almost_ blushed but he just nodded and allowed the ebony-haired man to help him up to his feet.

As Arthur made his way toward the liver-colored mare that he was currently using, Arthur's eyes landed on John's tent, and in response he reached into his satchel to feel the leather of his journal. Why did John go out of his way to return it..? Why did he do _any_ of the things he had the night previous to help Arthur?

Remembering he had something important he needed to do first, Arthur slipped his hand out of his satchel and focused on the task at hand. John would just have to wait...

There was someone else he had to see first.

_Knock. Knock._

Arthur stood on Vincent's porch, holding his belt anxiously with his hands. After the night prior, he didn't feel he had the right to just walk in anymore, he was basically a stranger to Vincent now, would the other even want to see him? Of course, he wouldn't offer Arthur to come with him to see the Sheriff if he didn't want to see him. Arthur took a breath as he waited patiently, glancing to his right where his valiant steed once laid, and while his body was gone the bloody stain remained... It still hurt like hell.

Hearing the door open, Arthur quickly turned his attention over to see Vincent looking much better than he had the night before. He got off a lot better than he looked previously, like Arthur he was lucky to only sport bruising around his right eye and a cut across his nose that would heal nicely.

"Can I help you?" Vincent asked curiously, arching a brow at Arthur causing confusion in the man in front of him.

"Uh... You told me to come over this mornin'." Arthur replied uneasily.

"... Huh I just... What was your name again?" Vincent asked, and soon it became obvious to Arthur what he was doing and a small relieved smile washed over his face as he hung his head for a moment.

"... Arthur."

"Arthur..?"

"... Arthur Morgan."

"Oh, I'm sorry I just don't _know_ anyone by that name... Perhaps you have the wrong house?" Vincent mused, eventually smiling a bit more playfully.

"... I deserve that." Arthur sighed, his smile falling as he thought about it. "... I shoulda just come clean from the beginning but... I never expected that you... We..." Arthur trailed off, feeling like he was making a fool of himself as he glanced up to meet Vincent's argent hues, but he eventually reached forward and took one of the other's hands.

"... You know, I normally don't let strangers into my house, but I suppose I can make an exception this time around." Vincent then said before opening the door more fully and stepping to the side so that Arthur could come inside to which he obliged.

When the door clicked in place behind him, Arthur felt the security of Vincent's hand land on his lower back before the smaller of the two passed him and for a moment he forgot why he really came over. However, as Vincent walked around to his front, Arthur couldn't help but reach out and land his palm gently on his cheek. Watching Vincent lean into the touch nearly made Arthur's heart burst.

"Weren't we supposed to go to the Sheriff?" He couldn't help but ask.

"... I felt guilty and went last night." Vincent admitted, earning a smile of amusement from Arthur, but it soon fell like before as he recalled the events the night before.

"... If you have any questions, you deserve the answers." Arthur then mentioned, knowing this was the least he could do and though there was hesitance in Vincent's eyes he spoke.

"... Did you want to rob me?" He inquired.

"No, god no." Arthur quickly stated, gently ushering Vincent close. "I swear on my life... I-I didn't even think I'd end up working here. When you and I met in the bar, I just came up with the name on the spot, I had no clue that you and I would... I just wanted to be the man you met in the bar... Not Arthur Morgan." He eventually explained, leaning in and resting his forehead against Vincent's as his heart fluttered in his chest.

Vincent bit his lip slightly, if Arthur was a liar, he was a good one... But deep down, Vincent believed him despite how foolish it may have been. Arthur's free hand found itself resting on the younger man's hip and gently pulling him closer until they were just inches apart.

"I-If I had known I had dangerous men like that after me..."

"... You wouldn't have been with me, huh?"

"... Probably not." Arthur sighed to his dismay.

"... Do you regret it?" Vincent inquired more curiously than anything.

"Never." Arthur replied seriously as he took a breath. "... I know you have no obligation to believe me but... This was the happiest I've been in I don't know how long."

"... Why does this sound like you're sayin' goodbye?" Vincent then inquired, watching Arthur pause momentarily and the realization was quick to come. "... Oh."

"I-I can't risk somethin' like that happening to you again i-if that bastard had-..." Arthur stopped abruptly as he remembered being forced to watch the detective crawl on top of Vincent like a goddamn worm. "... I-I can't."

"But he didn't." Vincent sighed, stepping closer to Arthur as he felt the familiar burning sensation behind his eyes beginning to build. "A-Arthur... Stay with me."

**_BA-BUMP._ **

Arthur's heart felt like it was breaking in two... One half remaining loyal to his dysfunctional family... The other staying with Vincent.

Never before had Arthur felt such a tug in two different directions, never before had he _wanted_ to leave the gang... He never saw himself doing anything different but now... With this beautiful young man standing in front of him wanting him just as much as Arthur wanted him in return and seeing his tears, it was too much. The best was to protect Vincent was to stay away from him no matter how much he wanted to stay.

"... I want to." Arthur whispered, watching Vincent's eyes soften despite the tears threatening to escape them.

"... I understand." Vincent eventually whispered back, reaching forward and intertwining his fingers with Arthur's, desperately trying to swallow the lump forming in his throat.

Arthur hated seeing Vincent cry over him, he didn't deserve those tears coming from those sharp silver hues. Reaching up, Arthur gently ran his thumb along Vincent's lower lid to wipe away the tears that were gathering before he leaned in and pressed his lips firmly against Vincent's, their tongues beginning to dance as Vincent reached up and wrapped his arms around Arthur's neck while the other's strong arms wrapped themselves around his waist.

"A-Arthur I-..." Vincent muttered, there was so much he wanted to say that knew he didn't have time for... But Arthur smiled against his lips.

"... Me too." He stated.

A small smile finally melted onto Vincent's charmingly disarming expression despite his tears, god Arthur would miss him... But now it was time to go.

Slowly, Arthur's fingertips slipped away from Vincent's hips as he backed up, who was quick to reach up and try to dry the tears that had been falling to no avail.

"Oh, before you go." Vicnent sniffed as he regained his composure, he quickly walked back into the bedroom and came back out with Arthur's bag he left behind a few minutes later. "Don't forget this." He reminded.

"... I really don't deserve you." Arthur snorted, reaching out and slinging the bag over his shoulder before offering one last kiss to Vincent.

"... Goodbye, Arthur Morgan."

"Goodbye, Vincent Taylor."

* * *

Despite wanting to get out of Airedale as fast as he could, there was _one_ thing Arthur did that he had been meaning to for months but never had the chance. As he rode back into camp, he was gently twirling the ribbon that Vincent's had given him to tie up his hair in his fingertips since he no longer needed it. He reached up and gently swept back his much more manageable short hair. He had to admit he loved the close shave on the back of his neck as well as no longer having to put any effort into his mane.

However, despite feeling more fresh his mood was still rather down as he climbed off his current mount. Arthur reached over and gently patted her shoulder before glancing around camp to see Susan ordering people around to pack up, if they didn't leave today they would definitely tomorrow. He took a long breath, he would miss it here, and not just because of Vincent. It was beautiful countryside, just the kind of place Arthur wanted to end up...

_A-Arthur... Stay with me._

Arthur's eyes fluttered shut before he began his walk toward his tent. He needed to pack up his things anyway, he slipped inside and set his bag on his cot before sitting down with a small sigh. It had been a long time since Arthur had felt so depressed, but reminding himself that only forcing himself to continue would the pain eventually fade, Arthur shook his head and reached down to his bag.

One by one, he pulled out his clothing and began separating them on which garments needed to be washed and which were just ruined. However, when he reached into his bag for the final time, something cold and metallic caught his fingertips. Arching a brow, Arthur latched onto the object and pulled it out, tilting his head he turned the silver circular object in his hand to see a small note on the other side.

_Take me instead._

Arthur's heart began to thunder deeply in his chest as he carefully removed the note to see that Vincent had snuck a pocket watch into his bag, probably when he retreated to grab it for him. Watching the clock tick effortlessly, it reminded him of Vincent's heartbeat... And despite having done well keeping his emotions at bay until this point, he felt tears began to build up behind his eyes, and he pursed his lips tightly before reaching up and already trying to wipe them away as he held the ticking watch close to his chest.

"Arthur can you-"

"Not now." Arthur interrupted as Susan walked inside, stopping her in her tracks. "... Please, not now." He said stoically enough for her to pause but eventually brush back out of the tent so that he could grieve in peace.

Arthur kept himself secluded for the rest of the afternoon, knowing he was unable to face anyone at the moment in his current state of mind, but as usual, his thoughts eventually began meandering back to John. By the time the sun began setting, Arthur was laying on his cot, his arms folded behind his back as he stared at the canvas. It felt like the past few weeks kept playing in slow motion in front of his eyes... But one thing stood out above everything else.

_You act like you're the only one whose hurt here! You lied to me! I trusted you and I risked everything with Abigail! I gave up my son because of you!_

Blinking, Arthur sat up and dug into his satchel before pulling out his journal and beginning to flip through the pages quickly, going back to May when Jack was born. Through his first few months of life, from his time as a newborn to an actively bubbly baby, Arthur sketched him often as if to record his growth. It was the only way Arthur could capture memories of him.

_May 15th_

_Jack, 4 days old._

The first drawing of him as a newborn... All at once, Arthur's heart swelled and a small smile melted onto his features as he remembered Jack's early days with such clarity. He then flipped a few more pages and began carefully folding the top corner to mark every illustration. In total there were about eleven, some were better than others, but Arthur felt that some of his pictures of Jack were some of the best he ever drew... So despite the hesitance, he carefully began to tear them out of his journal, one by one.

Once they were all together, Arthur thought his plan through one last time... But ultimately, he pushed himself up and glanced out of his tent. He saw John sitting by the fire, thankfully alone for the most part, he could still hear Susan sneer something unintelligible to others not far away. It was the first time he had seen John at all since their _talk_ at the river... For a moment Arthur was nervous, but one foot after the other, he began to approach John.

Noting movement in the corner of his eye, John glanced over looking shocked and horrified, but when Arthur simply held out a stack of papers, his expression morphed into confusion. Looking from the papers, to Arthur's face and back, he hesitated.

"W-What's that?"

"Just take it, Marston." Arthur muttered.

Blinking, John glanced back to the papers before carefully taking them from Arthur's grasp, and without a single word, Arthur walked off to help Susan do whatever the hell she wished of him earlier so he could avoid watching John look at his works.

Confused amber orbs watched the large man retreat, that was odd behavior for Arthur, however as John finally looked down to the first paper on top his heart felt like it was seizing. This was... His son.

Gulping harshly, John looked over the first picture slowly. Arthur was such a talented fucking artist... And despite wanting to hate him, John's hands began to tremble. Inhaling slowly, he turned to the next page which was drawn a few weeks later, and so on. Knowing that this was the best he was going to get to experiencing the birth of his son, John had to resist the urge to hug the papers to his chest and never let them go.

As he eventually made it to the last page which was done sometime in September, John bit his lip and released a small shuttered breath. However, through the paper, John could see some writing on the other side against the contrast of the campfire, and even though he hesitated, John turned it over.

_September 12th, 1895_

_I wish I could say the kid looked more and more like John every day but he doesn't... He reminds me a lot of Abigail, and if he were to take after her, perhaps it wouldn't be so bad. Lord knows we all could have used a woman's care in our childhood, maybe we woulda been better if we did..._

_God, I miss him... I miss him more than I miss air underwater... Why? Why did he leave?_

_I wish I had known, I wish he had talked to me... Anything... I would have rather left with him than this, it feels more painful than death itself._

_Wherever he is... I just hope he's safe and warm._

John's breath shuttered, was it really that simple? Could talking to Arthur have solved this before it even began? Did John make a horrible fucking mistake?

Well, that was obvious, there was no doubt leaving the way he did was a mistake, despite the information he had gathered. He lost everything... But in truth, he lost everything before he even left... At least now, he wouldn't have to worry about Arthur trying to be with him anymore, as long as they could truly go their own separate ways. Hell, Arthur had moved on... He was in love with that ranch owner, there was no doubt in John's mind.

_**FIN.** _

> I'm really on the ropes this time  
> I've been fighting all my life for you  
> I never should have said goodbye  
> But maybe that's what stupid people do
> 
> 'Cause you gave me peace  
> And I wasted it  
> I'm here to admit  
> That you were my medicine  
> Oh, I couldn't quit  
> And I'm down on my knees again
> 
> Asking  
> For nothing
> 
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life  
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life
> 
> Don't think I could forgive myself  
> I'm sorry for the ways that I used you  
> And I could care less right now  
> But you know, you hurt me pretty good too
> 
> Yeah, we made each other bleed  
> And we tasted it  
> I'm here to admit  
> That you were my medicine  
> Oh, love, I couldn't quit  
> And I'm down on my knees again
> 
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life  
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life
> 
> So wake me up when they build that time machine  
> I want to go back  
> Wake me up when you were sleeping next to me  
> 'Cause I really loved you
> 
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life  
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life ohh  
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life, yeah  
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life  
> Thank you for the happiest year of my life
> 
> source: [Happiest Year by Jaymes Young](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1ACVF-zqWQ&ab_channel=AminiumMusic)

> * * *

Hey guys! Wow, I can't believe we're at the end of Part 3 already! I'm honestly baffled but so proud of myself and so thankful to everyone who has been leaving Kudos, love, and criticism! I never would have gotten this far without your support, and even if you're new, seriously thank you!

PLEASE also check out this amazing fanart of [our baby gORL Annabelle done by Minkkk!](https://minkkks-blog.tumblr.com/post/632441786459111425/annabelle-sweetheart-for-gaydaroverloaded)

Once more I say thank you all again for following, and I promise to start Part 4 as soon as I can! I'm in the process of starting school but still, keep an eye out over the next couple of weeks!

Much love and Happy Halloween!

-Eros


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